₦airaland Forum

[b]My people, as far as am concerned, there is nothing wrong in adding a little more weight after marriage. Infact I love it. I and my wife have been married for 7 years now. Both of us have added a little more weight, and believe you me, we look so lovely like a happily married African-Nigerian couple should look. Adding too much weight would not be good for health and other reasons;Yes. But I definitely will not tolerate my wife looking like OGBONGE FISH because she wants to look slim-fit. I do not like skinny-slim-fit girls. I love ladies with curves. So as my wife has added a bit more weight after 3 issues, she is even more curvy, more mature and certainly more s²xy and more beautiful. And I love her the more for it. A married woman should look well-fed and respectable. There is nothing like village mentality in this. I have been arround the world, but I love us Africans more than any other race. So I don't buy the idea of someone trying to look like tooth-pick just to keep in shape. For what? But its also good for one to watch your weight and not become too fat or obesse. Bottom line is that every couple should decide what's best for them and go ahead to achieve it.Societal consideration and conformity is also important. If you live in Western Europe or America, you might do your best to give yourself a hell of exercise all the time to conform with their ogbonge-fish-looking preferred stature. But if you live in Naija, you should consider adding a bit more weight after marriage to look wellfed and trendy. Just make sure you deal with the tummy after childbirth. Nigerians are among the most beautiful people on planet earth.[/b]

[b]My People, I am one of those who believes that Jonathan is on the right track in many areas of National development although his nature does not command respect nor inspires one as a Leader should.
But honestly this pardoning of Alamesieya is a very wrong move. I know that Alams is his former boss and all those crap, but if GEJ takes fighting corruption even a bit seriously he will not commit this grave error of judgement. There is no justification for this irresponsible decision. I have always said that fighting corruption headlong is Jonathans weakest link and If its true that a chain is as strong as its weakest link then GEJ should realy buckle up and fight corruption headlong.
I do not criticise for the sake of it. A father can take a wrong decision (once in a while, not all the time), but He still remains your father and you will still respect him and not resort to calling him names. Let us condemn this counter-productive, ill-advised decision of Jonathan in the strongest possible terms. But let us not resort to name calling. Mr President has made a serious mistake in this. In short by this singular act, he has aborted the fight against corruption (that is if there was any fight against corruption since Yaradua and later GEJ took over).
This is one silly mistake. But does this singular act make Mr Jonathan unelectable come 2015, The answer is simply no.
If Jonathan gets it right in Railways (affirmative), if GEJ gets it right on Electoral reforms (affirmative) If GEJ gets it right on building more Universities and funding existing ones (affirmative), If GEJ gets it right in improving our Power generation and distribution (affirmative),If GEJ gets it right on Agriculture (affirmative) and if GEJ gets it right on the second Niger Bridge (I hope affirmative soon) amongst other things etc; Then even if GEJ scores below average on fighting corruption (Affirmative because he is already scoring far far below average), He will still have more positives than negatives to brandish as his score card to merit him getting a second term.
I just pray and Urge our president to please stop punching corruption with Kid gloves. Grow some serious balls and fight this scourge so that it will not bury Nigeria one day.[/b]

[b]The scenario painted here looks straight but is a complex situation.
I think you are a good guy for assuming responsibility for your late brother's wife and children, and completing your brothers house (with your other siblings)for his wife and family even after his death. You are indeed a good man.
I think the lady in question is also a good woman, that is why you go to many lengths to see that she does not feel the loss of her husband very much.
As for marrying her, I think you should think this through very carefuly. If you think you can cope with two women, considering the financial implication and the baggages of polygammy, then go ahead and marry her.
I am a christian and I prefer sticking to one wife because am a product of polygami and has seen first-hand the ills of polygammy. However those that say christianity forbids polygammy have not read their Bibles at all because Abraham, Isaac, David, Solomon etc all were polygamous bc it was their culture then. Jesus did not even marry. If we must follow Christ bumper to bumper then we should all remain celibate like Christ and Paul. If we insist on following the Western Culture bumper to bumper on the other hand then we should not shout TUFIAKWA when Men are marrying men and women are marrying women in their stupid same-sex marriage.
We are Africans and our culture accepts polygammy where necessary. I do not subscribe to it. But in this case I think it is the best thing to do for these reasons:
1. Marrying your late brother's wife will make her and her children remain permanently in the family.
2. Marrying her will stop her from looking for another husband that will not even come easily as she already has 5 kids.
3. Marrying her will stop her from bringing shame and embarrasment to your family while sampling for another husband.
4. Marrying her will make you the Father (and not only the father-figure) to your brother's children (and this is very important in the life of growning up kids).
5. Marrying her will give you a large family (I love large families), only make sure you are financialy and emotionally up to the task.
6. Marrying her will ensure that your brother's property remain in the family. Although there shouldn't even be cause for concern here as she already has a fairly grown up son who should get the property with his other siblings should she marry someone else.
7. Marrying her will give you the legitimate access to her Juicy part which you realy crave for (forgive me bros, but it's ok to admire your brothers wife if she is admirable, as long as you had no hand in your bros death, better take over before someone else does and jealousy will make you seize from helping her and her kids, ha ha)
To conclude, There is no guarantee that you will have a succesful marriage with one woman. There is also no guarantee that your marriage will be more successful when the women become two or more. Make your calculations very well and involve your whole family if you decide to marry her.
Very importantly, you must carry your wife along in every decision you want to take at every step of the way.
I wish you good luck.[/b]

My people, this write up is a great truth. To be a man and remain faithful to one girlfreind or wife is a heculian task. Any guy that is faithful to his spouse should realy be crowned a SAINT. Yes I mean the kind of bombardment we men receive from Ladies from every angle on a regular bases is unbelievable. If you are a married woman and you respect yourself by wearing reasonable clothes, disturbances from guys will be minimal. But if you are married man and you happen to be a bit well to do, with a nice car and house etc, ha, the arsenal the ladies will be throwing at you from the moment you leave your house to the time you come back in the evening will be so ferocious that if you scale through for one day , you are supposed to be crowned seriously. I have been in this francophone country Cameroon on a project for some time now. You can't believe what I see on a daily bases. Very skimpily clad ladies with big backyards in tights that are completely see-through (both married and unmarried, infact girls don't even get married here). When I say see-through I mean every word of it, you can even see the Kanda if you look well, Jeezzz. Infact only God knows how I have managed to hold myself all this long bc am one of those that so much love ladies with huuge Ikebe and this land happens to be the land of the Ikebes for real. But whether I do or I no do, no one can stop me from committing lookery. I mean if a lady is stupid enough (or ambitious enough) to come out half-naked in the street, I will be bold enough to look at her very well to marvel at the great curves that are being exposed. The temptations we men face on a daily bases are just too much.

[b]My people, I hadly comment on such posts as I prefer politics and the economy. But this one touches home right where it pains. Ordinarily marrying a virgin is and should be a thing of immence joy and pride for any man. But with my experience now, I don't think I will advise any man to consciously go for it. My reasons:
I have been married for seven years now. I have three issues, and honestly I have a very lovely and wonderful family that is the envy of most of my peers. However I have a huge problem inside. And am scared of what the future will bring.
My wife was not particularly a virging when I married her, but she was "almost" a virging, therefore she had little or no experience in matters of sex and intimacy. Incidentally I had many girlfriends then and one of the major reason why I chose my wife above most of the other girls was because she is faithful and can not mess arround, and I can completely trust her on that. We dated for 3 years before we eventualy got married. I saw the signs that this girl doesnt realy like sex but since I was preserving her for marriage I never realy disturbed her but unleashed my exploits on the other girls. Then we got married. Then I decided to become a responsible married man. Suddenly I realised what I had gotten myself into. My wife does not like sex. She will only do it (once in a while after several excuses) to please me. She has refused to learn anything from the first time we met till now ten years later. I have tried every reasonable way to teach her. I have taken her to counselling. I have pleaded, I have cajoled, I even withdrew my belt and flogged one day (very unlike me), yet all to no avail.
Now I have almost resigned to my fate. Now that is what scares me a real lot. Because I know myself. I love life and I love sex. I do not have unrealistic expectations as I know that my wife never had the experiences I have. But what I have gotten is a raw deal. All I expected was a healthy sex life with my lovely wife. Is that too much to ask? I sometimes think its a purnishment for all the girls I have dribbled before settling down.
What scares me is that if this continues I am bound to mess up. I have such a lovely family. My wife is such a good wife, responsible, takes good care of my home and kids, pretty, respects me a lot, infact every other thing is okay except the sex life. And this is what you can't tell your next door neighbour.
So I am a very happily married man, but inside I am realy turtured because my sex life is zero and I do not trust myself if things continue this way. Infact I have done a few runs outside and it was as great as before, but guilty conscience made me quit.
If I were a European or an American, I would have divorced my wife, reason -Sexual incompatibility. But that reason is bullshit here. I can't throw away the lovely family I have just because of Sex (that is precisely the problem).
My senior friend has advised me the way out - that is to get a secret concubine.
I have tried it and believe you me, it worked. I do not disturb my wife any more, and she is happy that she is not being disturbed for sex again as she would prefer not to have sex even for a year unless its time to make babies.
But the problem is the other lady. Some of them are always scheeming, either for money, or to displace the one inside and come inside too. And they could even be diabolical or do something funny to your lovely family just to get a part of you too. Infact though this arrangement works for now, there is no guarantee that something ugly might not come out of it later.
I am the responsible family man type. So having concubines is not realy my style. But am forced to do it.
So my advise is that YOU MUST KNOW THE SEXUAL CAPABILITIES OF YOUR WIFE-TO-BE BEFORE MARRIAGE, AMONGST OTHER THINGS. Or else you might find out that this Sex thing can derail a marriage and life you have painstakingly built. I rest my case.[/b]

[b][b]My people, This sounds good. But its been quite some time (in fact its been centuries as someone aptly put it here)since we started hearing about "Federal government to build second Niger Bridge". If President Goodluck Jonathan delivers on this particular project (ofcourse I think he will), then Jonathan's prediction of becoming the best president Nigeria ever hard from the most criticised one, will soon become a reality. If Jonathan brings back the rails (which he is already doing), If Jonathan takes our electricity generation and distribution to an enviable level (which I believe he is right on course), If Jonathan Makes this second Niger bridge a reality, plus the giant strides he is already making in Agriculture, Airport repairs and building new ones, New Universities and funding existing ones, Electoral reforms which are already bearing fruits etc, Then surely this much criticised Jonathan, this much maligned Jonathan, This much disrespected Jonathan will end up Becoming the best president Nigeria has actualy ever had just like the Super Eagles under his administration has ended a 19 years drought and won the last AFCON. Let us keep encouraging Him to do more. And let us also keep critisicing him constructively to keep him on his toes. He certainly needs to do a lot more in the area of fighting corruption and National security. I SEE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL, WHAT DO YOU SEE?[/b][/b]

[b]My people, it is said that a prophet does not have respect in his homeland. This is very true in this case. We do not realise what a GREAT GIFT God has given this nation called Nigeria and humanity at large by given us this major prophet T.B.Joshua. This is one of the greatest prophet/men of God that humanity has witnessed and we are very very lucky that he is a Nigerian. Yet we do not appreciate him. "By their fruit you shall know them". T.B.Joshua has been consistent in giving documented prophesies that manifest exactly as he prophesied it. T.B.Joshua has been used by God to heal SO MANY PEOPLE from SO MANY COUNTLESS COUNTRIES OF THE WORLD of SO VARIED TYPES OF AILMENTS. T.B.Joshua has been used by God to deliver so many people from so many bundages renginbg from family curses to Mental health issues etc. T.B.Joshua is very humble, gives so much out to charity. In fact if the other Men of God in this country follow the foot step of T.B.Joshua Ngeria will be far much better than it is today. Do you know that This great prophet of God T.B.Joshua is VERY VERY INSTRUMENTAL TO THE SUCCESS OF THE SUPER EAGLES in this just concluded AFCON? Have you people ever wondered how the Eagles that struggled through the group stage of the competition suddenly became a world class team playing great games and beating Cote D'ivoire, Mali and Burkina Faso in style? Try to figure it out. We should learn to appreciate the fact that God loves Nigeria so much that he gave us this great and Major prophet. He is there to help guide us into receiving the blessings in Christ Jesus. But ofcourse its your choice to keep criticising and remain stagnant in life. But I tell you Smart people like Stephen Keshi, and many Presidents of the world are going to the Synagogue church of All Nations in droves to get what ever they need from God.[/b]

[b]My people, it's good to note that government officials are brainstorming on how to rescue the textile industry. This Jonathan presidency that many Nigerians are lampooning might just end up as one of the best administration in Nigeria like the Super Eagles turned from super chickens to Cup Winners before our very eyes. Jonathan might not look inspirational, he might not look presidential enough, he might not be an orator, he might not have enough balls to fight corruptuption as we desire, but he is certainly getting certain criticals things right. He is getting it right in Railway, He is doing much in the power sector,etc The good results that we seek are coming slowly and steadily. It wount be long before many of us realise that this man is actualy working. Ofcourse he certainly needs to do a lot more in many other sectors. He most certainly needs to grow some balls to fight corruption headlong. Let us learn from our mistakes in not having faith in the Super Eagles early enough. Let us stop lampooning but encourage Mr Goodluck Jonathan to do more to get us out of the woods. With more faith in our president, he might just spring a surprise like the super eagle and get this country standing on its feet once again.[/b]