₦airaland Forum

Just the kind of sh!t that happens when a man thinks he is not being a man until he asserts control over a female.

Nigeria is a country with intelligent, talented, hardworking and healthy people.

The problems we have are the bad people in power, the small percentage of people who paint an overall negative picture of the country to foreigners, and our high tolerance for their bullsh!t.

soberdrunk:
No girl is 'into you' instantly', unless you are a celebrity, you have to make them become 'into you'......

Wrong. Within the first 5 seconds of seeing you, a girl has already decided whether SHE WANTS to fvck you or not. Every other thing she does after that is just a way of putting you through a proverbial filter to see just how much she can get from you or how far you are willing to go to get between her legs i.e. how much YOU 'value' her pvssy (in other words: to 'form' as if she is not cheap).

The more you 'value' her pvssy, the easier it is for her suck resources from you and the less likely it is for you to access her vag.
The less you 'value' her pvssy--the less you care about fvcking her--the less sh!t you are willing to put up with just to get laid, the more she will desire to fvck you.

Shikena.

pocohantas:
Since you know all these. How come you guys only say women hate women, when both culprits are women?

What did the woman in question do to warrant her getting stripped in public?
There's a difference between punishing someone for a serious crime or fighting to protect one's valuable property and going overboard over silly or 'small' matters.

You won't see a man stripping another in public because the latter wore an item of clothing that belongs to him.

A woman on the other hand will stab another because of a blouse:

https://www.nairaland.com/957761/horror-igbinedion-university-student-stabs

Men don't bathe their fellow men in acid just because the former dreamt that the latter is cheating with their spouse:

https://www.nairaland.com/3895037/lady-pours-acid-17yr-old

Men don't conspire to beat their fellow man to death because he went to gossip over something. Men don't do sh!t like this:

https://www.nairaland.com/3732357/see-how-girl-murdered-roommate

pocohantas:
...men have done more harm to women.

So typical. I expected you to say sh!t like this. You women never fail to portray men in a bad light and blame them for your woes whenever you get the chance.

pocohantas:
Kontinu to deceive yourself. Men that neked suspects and carry out jungle justice on their fellow men are the ones that love each other ba?

And on what grounds do men do that? If the 'fellow' man committed a criminal act, he will get something he DESERVES.

You don't see men stripping each other naked or bathing each other in acid over trivial and pointless things do you?

Men love women and they rape them physically?

Women rape men too. Don't forget or ignore that.

Safiaa:
She's beautiful either way.

If she knows this, why does she need to wear make-up?

Most people only wear this amount of makeup for weddings and special occasions.

Wrong. I can remember when I was still in the university. Many of my female course mates wore make-up as heavy as this to class EVERYDAY.

Deception at the highest level.

Without make-up, almost all women won't be given a second look when they are passed on the street.

Look at the pic above. The only reason why the lady looks as good as she does even with the make-up is because of the photoshoot techniques that have been employed.

It is this make fake-up of a thing that makes each woman behave like the world revolves around her. She safely hides her insecurities behind this mask of deception.

Dear men, when women behave like they are "too good" for you, or think they are "out of your league", just remember: it all washes off with soap and water.
As a man, NO woman is out of your league because men look even better without make fake-up.

She is not unattainable and unapproachable. She only ACTS that way.

This is why womens self esteem is generally so fragile. They know the self esteem is derived from a shaky foundation that could easily topple if the photoshop filter is not right or if it rains & their hair and/or make-up gets messy.

Make up represents the complete narcissism of the female mind. It is about them making themselves appear more desirable yet having the power to appear unattainable. It is about them trying to get the best mate with the manipulation of make up. It is about them spending tens to hundreds of thousands of Naira a year on hair, make up, their appearance yet complaining when they are being judged about their looks. And when they fall outside of the marketable age, they then complain they are not getting looked at or considered attractive any longer.

Nice one.

Too bad he is in a country that doesn't encourage his kind of creativity...

[wrong thread]

Fucktensei:
MEN GOING THEIR OWN WAY. It's the current trend in Japan right now

MGTOW is not a trend and it's not a current trend. Jesus in the bible is a good example of an ancient MGHOW.

It is a philosophy of life and each man that Goes His Own Way has HIS OWN unique way to live.

There are MANY men from all over the world who are Going Their Own Way and they don't even know that there is an acronym (MGTOW) for their lifestyle.

Jamiubond009:
Marriage is an archaic and oppressive institution that should have been abolished years ago. And love is nothing but a magical comfort food for the weak and uneducated. Yeah it makes you feel warm and relevant but in the end love leaves you weak, dependent and fat. Proudly MGTOW

.

Buhari's "irresponsible elements" comment followed an account of a meeting he had with Ojukwu---a meeting that ended with a consensus for unity.

Buhari is from the North and Ojukwu was from the South East.

I watched the footage of his speech this morning and I can vividly recall that he didn't specifically tag any group as "irresponsible element".

Anyone with common sense will know that the "irresponsible elements" he addressed is ANYONE who is advocating the division of Nigeria be it Arewa Youth, IPOB or any other entity out there.

Seyi Law is the goof here.

momentum85:
you just want to paint men black, 2years old baby doing all these? mtcheew!

Don't mind them. Society (women & pvssy worshipping men) and mainstream media love to demonize boys and men in an overwhelming manner.

Girls and women, on the other hand, are portrayed as the sweetest and most harmless things to have ever existed on the surface of the earth. Like, they can't do anything wrong.

sweatlana:
.
If a man taking care of his wife and kids is exploitation to u,...

Because that man has been raised to have the false belief that the ultimate purpose of his existence is to work and earn to provide for a woman and the 'fruits of her womb'.
The woman takes advantage of this and exploits it (mostly in a subtle manner).

sweatlana:
I feel sorry for ur future spouse

.

My future spouse doesn't exist.

The savings I have is for my family. I can't even touch it with out notice to my husband.

Ok. Now I have more clarity on the sh!t you posted previously. Hopefully, you are one of those who will be too ashamed to dump your husband and move ahead with the savings if he goes broke.

I don't blame u guys. Most Nigerians grew up in dysfunctional homes...

Lol. Who is "u guys"? You don't know me and you are linking me with a dysfunctional home.

u can't give what u don't have

I can also choose to not give what I have.

But it would be better if u try to ensure ur kids have it better than u did.

Working towards having enough to raise a child(ren) before bringing one to this world in the first place.

sweatlana:
... sane men too pride is buying their woman "shinny things" !
When a men knew that a woman is 100% his responsibility!

He pays ALL THE BILLS WITH JOY AS A MAN TAKING CARE OF HIS FAMILY!

My personal money is ment for savings.

Hopefully my daughters will marry men like their dad.

"He who finds a wife has found a good thing". They say.

The above quote is proof that he who finds a wife has found someone that will exploit him for the rest of his life.

gozzlin:
And oh, for the records, not everything is about money. You can have all the money in the world and attract all sorts of women. But you'll most prolly never attract a woman who loves you sincerely, but rather loves the cheddar you give her.

A sensible man seeks a woman that truly loves him for who he is not what he has.

It's funny to me that in 2017, there are still guys who believe that there are women who are capable of 'loving' men not because of money.

The only type of men that women 'love' not because of money are the bad boys. This is because the bad boy is an embodiment of what turns her on sexually.

Bro, try marrying a woman without any money and you will find out exactly what love means to her.

3 billion Naira on a stinky vagina that will still end up blown out and slacked at the end of the day.

3 billion Naira on a female who will inevitably get old and ugly.

This guy is the biggest loser of the year.

Posting sh!t like the OP did is a complete waste of time.

The average female has a good number of men who are chasing after and showering her with attention on a daily basis. This results to an over inflated ego, narcissistic behaviour, over-the-top sense of entitlement, and an exaggerated self estimation in females.

As you can see, some females on this thread are already dismissing the OP's write up. That should tell you a lot.

In the typical female's mind, asking her to do or become what the OP has in his write up is bullshit. She believes that men should be falling at her feet without any real effort on her part just because she has a vagina.

The average female can be the most disrespectful, nastiest, extremely self centered, and most mediocre being on the planet and still demand that she deserves the best man with the best things in life without putting any effort into EARNING them.

StephDamielola:
At that very time of their life, they are vulnerable. They could kill for a boy who only cares about their Pussycat and to discuss it with his friends.

For her to have killed someone because of the boy, I'm pretty sure that she meant it from the bottom of her heart to give him her Pussycat.

bukatyne:
A lot of women will tell you they find working outside the home less stressful than working inside the home.

(keyword is bolded). A lot of women will TELL....That doesn't mean it's true (I still don't see how cooking and cleaning a house are such stressful tasks). Women who work just say those things as a way to uphold the facade that they are 'more valuable' and 'better' than the women who do not work.
A woman will also TELL you such a thing as a way of saying that deep down, she does not like to cook for her husband and take care of the home (i.e. doing simple chores)--that she is in the marriage primarily for HER own benefits.

And all these talk of men 'working hard' to provide... except they work menial/multiple jobs, job descriptions are not gender specific. Whatever 'hard work' a man does at work, there are wives doing same

I did not state anywhere that women also don't work. But look around you. Who, between the husband and wife, provides more of the welfare for the household out of what they earn from their work in most cases? Who is expected to bring more to the table? It is a well known and obvious fact that women prefer to marry men who make more than them so that the men become the ones to carry the bulk of the task of providing for the household (wife and children). In a marriage; For every woman that 'works', there is a man who works to provide and/or earn more than she does.

with expectation to still keep their home.

So men are not expected to keep their homes? A man can abandon his 'husband & father duties' and his wife, family members, and society will find it OK. Right?

Women are pressured to marry in the society; women dream of their weddings (not marriage) because of the festivities....

Hmm...let's see... Women don't want marriage and are pressured into it. But still, all their lives, they dream of & long for the day that signifies and marks it's beginning. How does that even make sense?

If someone told you that you are going to eventually be sentenced to life imprisonment, will you be looking forward to the day of your sentencing or will you be praying for that day to never come?

Older wives always tell younger wives that dating is not same as marriage...

Yes. Dating is not the same as marriage. With marriage, a woman has a tighter grip on a man's balls, his resources, and his life in general than when she's merely dating him.

And in Nigeria of today, a man as the sole provider is an anomaly .

Once again, I didn't say that women don't work. Women will marry men who make more than them so as to ensure that the husbands are the ones who make the major provisions for them and their children. In this same 'Nigeria of today', a woman will be making her own money and still demand that her husband provides for HER.

Have you considered why widowers quickly remarry

The widower who quickly remarries does so because he is either advised (read: pressured) to do so or because the the new wife was able to successfully convince him (mostly through subtle means) that she will put an end to his grief and "loneliness"---that she will 'make his life sweeter'. He is not doing it because he is looking for someone to support him with finances.

why widows esp with kids face their children and stay on their lane

Lol. It's not as if the widows made the deliberate choice to 'stay on their lane'. The reason why most widows remain unmarried is because they were widowed at the time when they have become physically unattractive (not necessarily old). No man in his right mind will want that. Also, no man in his right mind will want to assume responsibility for another man's ejaculation(s) child(ren).

Do men love slavery so much to do multiple rounds?

Those men who 'love slavery' are brainwashed and/or pressured into it.

bukatyne:
Chimo, all these to a simple question?

Did you miss the part where I wrote that I didn't write all that solely for you?

Using Nigeria as an example, how many wives do you know who truly stay at home waiting for their husband's paycheck?

The ones who work still shift the onus of handling the major expenses to their husbands.

Also, this male work horse, what does he typically do apart from 'working' in a traditional marriage?

The work horse works harder, takes very great risks, might do dangerous and life threathening jobs, amass debt e.t.c. just so his household can be as comfortable and well provided for as possible. Wives who work don't go this far to provide.

Who takes care for the daily running of the home and every other thing apart from providing?

If by 'every other thing' you mean cooking, cleaning and looking after children, you have no tangible point here.

Who translates the cash to comfort for him?

By 'cash to comfort', you mean spending HIS money the exact way SHE WANTS. Right?

A working wife has it worse.

How? By cooking and cleaning?

Most women want to be mothers and marriage is the legal route to that

Not legal but socially accepted. You women work under a collective mentality. You work with what is trending and 'in vogue'. The reason why most women still want to get married as a way to become mothers is because that is what most of you still approve of.

.

Now that baby mamaism is less stigmatised,

...by fellow women. Because more women are now opting to be baby mamas. Because that's what is gradually trending & getting popular.

2. Lol! again. You are obviously not talking of the Nigerian marriage. Wives are capable of using physiological tools and Iya Risi is still hawking to send her kids to school.

Iya Risi hawks because she is well aware of her husband's economic strength. She knows that no matter what she does, she still won't get more than what she's getting from him. That doesn't mean she still won't demand for soup money from him.

I believe this is as a result of plenty African Magic...

An attempt to shame me won't work. So don't even bother using it.

Take a poll of real people and see how many wives/mothers were able to use 'tools' to force their men to provide.

MANY. These tools are not used in an obvious manner so alot of men fall for it.

3. A wife can only 'starve' a husband that can't cook.....

...or a husband who she knows will come back home hungry and too tired.

4. And husbands don't throw tantrums when things don't go their way?..... Anyways they only beat their wives

What is the true percentage of men who beat their wives? Just because many men keep quiet about what they face from their wives and because the reverse is blown out of proportion doesn't make it true that majority of men are wife beaters.

. Brother, I am sure you really don't believe this. Here that a man seemingly loses nothing in divorce?

The point is not whether he gains or loses from the divorce. The point is the backlash that comes with it.

8. These tools might work once in a while.... later, the novelty wears off.

And then, the wife resorts to crazy & desperate measures (and that is IF the novelty ever wears off)

10. This must be as a result of reading many reddit and MGTOW.

No. It is as a result of me being sure that I am telling the truth. Now I see where your perceptions are coming from. But like I said, shaming doesn't work on me.

Asking married men would help a lot.

You mean the same married men like *FX* on this very thread? You mean the countless married men who are currently regretting their decisions to get married?

And any man who feels like a slave should switch positions with his wife.

Yea...just so the wife can turn around to mock and even resent him more for it. Be honest with yourself: if you are a wife, will you like to be the one under the pressure of making sure the needs of your home are provided?

Even the Bible says 'He who finds a wife finds a good thing'

Not in my own book. This is the same old mantra that is being used to lure naive men into marriage in the first place...only for them to find out that they've been lied to all along.

bbeautylik:
hmmm I guess you said all this because you ain't a woman. I have twins who are less than a year, I wake up at night in intervals to feed them.. waking up by 5am to get everything done and get ready to work while my husband still sleeps. 7am I leave for work with the kids with divided attention. come back 3pm start battling with house chores and the kids till after 8pm when they are asleep.

Ok. Good job. But the babies don't remain babies forever. Do they? Looking at the big picture, You will do those midnight tasks for only a minimal percentage of time. The children will be remotely dependent on you for most of the time they are under your 'care'.

Every man/woman dream is to get married.

wrong. I know men and women who don't want to get married.

bbeautylik:
we both work...... then everything else I do?

I can accurately guess that your husband's labour (work) is the means to the bulk of you and your children's comfort and provisions.

"everything else" is nothing difficult. There are many men (bachelors) who work, cook, and clean all by themselves. You don't see them complaining and moaning about those domestic tasks being difficult.

Besides, if you think wives suffer more in marriages, why do you women always look forward to getting married right from your teenage years? Why do you women spend a very extended period of time planning the perfect weddings for yourselves?

Why do brides faint and go crazy upon learning that the grooms are not showing up for the wedding?
It's just like saying that a prospective slave is looking forward to being taken away by a slave owner to be subjected to hard labour, and then feeling bad when the slave owner doesn't show up.

bbeautylik:
Women suffer the most in marriage.... Imagine I work,cook,clean take care of my kids... practically I do everything so what are you saying?

Abegi. You women make it sound as if cooking, cleaning, and taking care of children are herculean tasks.

I cook for myself and clean my own house. It doesn't take me anything. Even a monkey or a dog can clean a house if properly trained.

And as for taking care of children, I don't see how keeping an eye on children while they play in order to prevent them from harming themselves is such a difficult thing.

practically I do everything

So your husband doesn't work? He doesn't labour to the best of his abilities to make sure that you and your children get what they need? And if your husband doesn't do all these, you are ok with it? You don't complain?

mamagee3:
Guys, why would a man ask a lady if she ever had sex with her ex-boyfriend?

If someone wants to buy a pre-owned car, they have to know exactly how much mileage it has.

bukatyne:
Marriage is slavery for whom?

What is your definition of slavery?

Marriage is slavery for men. A man gets married under the delusion that he is going to become the "king of 'his' own house". But he ends up becoming nothing else but a work horse---for the comfort of 'his wife'.
This is a key reason why women always want, and are looking forward to, get married: so they can have someone to shoulder all the burdens of providing for them while they do little to nothing, and also have someone to blame when there is a lack of provisions. A man will foolishly get married because he has been told all his life that being a husband is his role and his life is SUPPOSED to be that way.

Once a marriage takes off, the wife assumes the position similar to that of a slave owner---managing the affairs of her slave (husband). Using certain psychological and physical tools, she will exploit the husband and make sure he is as productive as possible so that there are enough resources (coming from the husband's labour) for her to satisfy herself with. She also uses these tools to keep him from running away (i.e. divorce or leaving the marriage eventually).

The major tools she uses are:

-the threat of starvation (the wife takes over the kitchen and can decide anytime to not cook for the husband if he doesn't do what she wants).

-loss of peace of mind (the wife will nag endlessly, b!tch, moan, raise her voice & refuse to shut up, cause deliberate confusion & disorientation, and also throw tantrums whenever something doesn't go her way).

-loss of sexual 'privileges' (the uninhibited & heightened sex drive of a man is taken advantage of. The wife will either use sex as an incentive to make the husband do what she wants or she will go on 'sex strikes' whenever the husband doesn't behave according to her wishes and desires.)---making it look like she is doing her husband a great deal of favour by just laying on her back and spreading her legs.

-the baby/children (the wife knows to a great extent that a man in his right mind will not abandon a child he believes to be his own. She will use the child as a way of keeping the man from running away and making him work even harder. She will also threaten him with the poor well-being & her refusal to take care of the child if he goes against her wishes).

-shaming tactics (in our society, a man is shamed severely for his "failure" to keep 'his' woman. A lot of men fear being subjected to this shaming. So they rather just stay in the marriage, suffer in silence, and do whatever the 'wife' wants.) (men also get shamed with things like: they should "man up" or that they are not "man enough" or that they are "not being a man" if they don't do anything their wives or women want them to).

Other tools include: praise, blame, flattery, withdrawal of approval, manipulation of the man's insecurities and fears, the shattering of his ego, e.t.c.


*I don't need to define slavery because anyone who knows what slavery means and reads what I wrote above will see no difference between it and marriage.
The only difference is the enabling environment, methods (of reward/punishment), and institution (or 'bracket') under which a successful slave-master relationship takes place.

P.S. I didn't write all these solely because I want to reply you. Your profile says you are a female so deep down, you already know that all these are facts. I did it in case there are men 'out there' who NEED some clarity on marriage, might end up reading this post and save themselves from the scam called "marriage".

AnonyNymous:
Wow! Thanks so much for getting back to me. And yes, I agree with a lot of your post. I just wanted to ask though, what are the legal implications of a civil union? You know, what homosexuals used to have before they were allowed to get married? I guess I should research this myself but as far as I know, heterosexual couples aren't allowed to have civil unions in the UK.

I myself am not really that interested in sex, I mean I'm a healthy human and some days I have sexual urges but a lot of the time I just see it as two naked sweaty bodies exchanging disgusting fluids, lol. But assuming I was, say, hypersexual, what if I met a partner that was into the 'same stuff' as me? What if I met a partner who was into swinging, hedonism, or polyamory? Then if the reason to avoid marriage was because of infidelity/sexual satisfaction, hasn't the problem been solved? Thanks to technology, a search on the most basic dating site will help you find someone like that very easily. What would you say about that?

Well, it depends on the kind of society you are in. If the laws of that society recognizes civil union as illegal, then it is best to avoid it.

You should also take note that living with someone who is into 'the same stuff' as you for a period of time might lead to assumption of marriage by the laws. Again, this depends on the society and the kind of laws they have there. I know little to nothing about UK laws. But what I'm sure of is that if assumption of marriage takes place, you are going to be forced to perform the same marital duties as a married man.

In MY honest opinion, I think the best option is that when you find a person who is into 'the same stuff' as you, you should have nothing more than a casual relationship with them. That will save you from a lot of headaches in the long run.

AnonyNymous:
I've just been thinking/wondering if there's anything everyone else is seeing that I'm not.

I understand you and the fact is: there is a lot of things YOU are seeing that everyone else is not. Like I said previously, people get married blindly. Most people who are looking forward to get married (especially men) have been indoctrinated from birth to believe that they are SUPPOSED to do so. They have been told things like their life is meaningless if they don't end up with that 'special' person to spend the rest of their lives with. They have no other vision of their future other than to 'settle down'. This indoctrination (and brainwashing) is being done through various channels such as family and social pressures, TV, Music, movies, institutions (religious, academic, governmental), shaming tactics e.t.c.

The indoctrination is so strong, so relentless and so in-your-face that one is most likely led to believe that that is how their lives SHOULD be. Virtually everything we've been taught about life since birth is false.

You have to learn to stop looking at how people pretend to be living and start looking at how they are truly living. There's a lot of lies about how marriage is all about eternal bliss and blah blah blah. The reality is that marriage is a rollercoaster of endless drama, headaches, and inconveniences.

As an adult I'm definitely not living in this country, and in most developed places marriage is basically betting 50% of everything you've ever worked for in your life,

With such knowledge and awareness, would you really want to get married when you get there? It's just like walking into a casino to gamble knowing fully well that you will end up walking out with half of your wallet or bank account drained out.

that you won't get tired of your partner.

You just have to be brutally honest with yourself as a man. Man's natural make-up is not intended for him to be---or spend the rest of his life---with only one woman. At most, women should only be temporarily, casually and occasionally involved in a man's life.

Because once you get divorced you have to give away half of everything you own.

Even more than half in some cases due to either or more of certain factors such as: the judge, the jurisdiction, poor or weaker legal representation, e.t.c. You might even end up with nothing at the end of the day (after paying legal fees & the rest). Also, remember that alimony and child support [if you have a child(ren) in the course of the marriage] will be involved.

To avoid that I'd have to get a pre-nuptial agreement. If I sign a prenup and I'm sitting down with my future 'wife' discussing the terms of agreement of what should happen in case we can't handle each other's shit anymore,

There are certain western men I communicate with regularly and from what I've learnt from them, their judicial system is corrupt and biased against men. Prenups are thrown out of the window the instant a woman files for divorce. Any pre-nupital agreement you think you have with her is shunned once she decides that she is 'tired' of the marriage.

then is marriage still about love?

I'm convinced that you already know the answer to this question.

*Based on the questions you've asked and the observations you backed them up with, I perceive you as someone who thinks correctly. Trust me, your line of thinking is not abnormal and I can assure you that you are not alone on this.

In short, let me stop talking writing plenty and let me lead you straight to this place:

https://www.mgtow.com/forums/forum/marriage-divorce/

-If you have any further question(s), feel free to ask.

(sorry for the late reply. It's been a quite busy Saturday for me)

AnonyNymous:
I'm the one that needs advice here. On whether marriage itself is really worth it, or if its just a social construct that people have followed for so long but isn't really necessary. Considering how marriage now has legal implications in our world today.

Why do you have to?

Most people these days are like sheep that are guided and led towards certain directions by social 'norms'. They blindly do things just because everyone else is doing it. They don't even stop for a second to think and ask if such things are right or healthy for them.

Most people are getting---or are willing to get---married because everyone else is doing it. They believe it's the "normal" thing to do. People who are refusing to get married (for good reasons), on the other hand, are seen as "abnormal".

Marriage is a way to make yourself a slave as a man. Read the replies that FX has posted on this thread so far.

"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late." --- Max Kauffmann

FX:
Marriage is not easy at all. If you know what married couples are passing through just to keep the marriage, u will better stay on your own. If I'm to advise my child , I will tell him or her never to get married to anybody. You can have all you want without getting married. Freedom is priceless. Money can't buy it.

I tell you, man. Marriage is slavery.

It's just unfortunate that the older men are failing to warn the younger ones because of their ego. They also don't want to be seen as defeated people. So they just suffer and slave away in silence.

One will always wonder why most husbands die way long before their wives do....

T