₦airaland Forum

wat happened 2 there GSM's
let them sms ans to themselves
at least dean no fit supervise 4 rooms 2geda

i must confess i'm out of my league.
not familiar with any of this

@ vescucci
1st, Banderas is a spaniad not a mexican.

2nd , Robert De niro acted as an italian 4 a very long time b4 he bcame a citizen of italy (he wasn't born an italian) yet he acted all his roles perfectly. Banderas was perfect in 13 warrior not sloppy.


the movie was titled [color=#990000]TWO MUCH[color=Black][/color] and dont let it surprise you that he picked his wife from the cast, Melanie Griffith. he was suppose to marry her in the movie b4 falling in love wit her sister. they av a daughter and they've been married since 1996 so u can b sure he knows how to handle d ladies n d troubles that comes with the fame.


in a collabo wit QT, i'm equally waiting
@ moondust,

[b]hello every one! i've been away too long , dont even know where to start  .
talking about 007, casino royale was actually the 1st bond story, so instead of agreein with iice i will say the producers are actually going back to the original fleming creation without the weapons sophistication that characterised bond. casino royale was supposed to be bond at the beginning of his career. that explains the lack of charisma we were all used to in our james.

o brother was lovely likewise ladykillers, nice work from the cohen brothers but i dont think it was too soon. o brother was 2000 n ladykillers was 2004. i think hanks n clooney are both lovely actors from diffrent worlds. wouldn't want to compare but if i'm to pick, i will def c o' brothers again b4 ladykillers.

"Haba! Hitchcock can make even the simplest things scary and anyone that could make James Stewart scary is gotta be on the top of the heap" heard hitchcock blamed him for the failure of one of his movies, probably the last they did 2gaeda n neva used him again. not confirmed though. and what do i care, they were @ there peaks b4 my existence so i can only talk 4rm hearsays and worse, rumours. but from stewart list of awards, he was definitely , 
frank miller to me is a comic writer, wont accept him as a director  
will try to c hopkins in fracture. 
come what do u guys think of harry potter?
c ya [/color][/b][color=#990000]

dason4life:
Is the guy a really instrumentalist?
I was thrilled with the music he played in MAMBO KINGS

not sure but he was a footballer, sustained an injury @ age 14 n neva played ball again.
still a real madrid fan.

Cosmetics Line

Luke's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products she asked, "Darling, honestly what age would you say I am?"

Looking over her carefully, Luke replied, "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty-five."

"Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed.

"Hey, wait a minute!" Luke interrupted. "I haven't added them up yet." [size=8pt][/size]

Letters On The Skin

Three women at the doctors office. The first one goes in to see the doctor. When the doctor goes to examine her he notices a big Y on her chest.
The doctor asks, " Why do you have a big Y on your chest?"

She replys, " Well, my boyfriend went to Yale and when we make love he likes to wear his college sweater."

The doctor nods and continues on with the next patient. When he examines her he notices a big H on her chest.

Agian, the doctor asks, " How did you get a big H on your chest?" The woman replys " My husband went to Harvard and when we make love he likes to wear his college sweater."

The doctors just nods his head and continues on with the last patient. As he examines her he notices once again that this woman also has a letter on her chest. A large M.

He says, " Dont tell me, your boyfriend went to Michigan?"

" NO" replys the patient " But my girlfriend went to Wisconsin"

Bayi ni OLUWA OLORUN awon omo ogun wi,


emi yio sure fun awon ti o ba sure fun e,
(gen 12;3)

nice ones

Thrity In A Raw

On a farm out in the country lived a man and a woman and their three sons.

Early one morning, the woman awoke, and while looking out of the window onto to the pasture, she saw that the family's only cow was lying dead in the field. The situation looked hopeless to her -- how could she possibly continue to feed her family now?

In a depressed state of mind, she hung herself. When the husband awoke to find his wife dead, as well as the cow, he too began to see the hopelessness of the situation, and he shot himself in the head.

Now the oldest son woke up to discover his parents dead (and the cow!), and he decided to go down to the river and drown himself.

When he got to the river, he discovered a mermaid sitting on the bank. She said, "I've seen all and know the reason for your despair. But if you will have sex with me five times in a row, I will restore your parents and the cow to you."

The son agreed to try, but after four times, he was simply unable to satisfy her again. So the mermaid drowned him in the river.

Next the second oldest son woke up. After discovering what had happened, he too decided to throw himself into the river.

The mermaid said to him, "If you will have sex with me ten times in a row, I will make everything right." And while the son tried his best (seven times!), it was not enough to satisfy the mermaid, so she drowned him in the river.

The youngest son woke up and saw his parents dead, the dead cow in the field, and his brothers gone. He decided that life was a hopeless prospect, and he went down to the river to throw himself in.

And there he also met the mermaid. "I have seen all that has happened, and I can make everything right if you will only have sex with me fifteen times in a row."

The young son replied, "Is that all? Why not twenty times in a row?"

The mermaid was somewhat taken aback by this request. Then he said, "Hell, why not twenty-five times in a row?" And even as she was reluctantly agreeing to his request, he said, "Why not THIRTY times in a row?"

Finally, she said, "Enough!! Okay, if you will have sex with me thirty times in a row, then I will bring everybody back to perfect health." Then the young son asked, "Wait! How do I know that thirty times in a row won't kill you like it did the cow?"

i neva knew ha sterrs in his movies
noticd that though
was talking about jerry bruckheimer? nice producer. produced enemy of d state, d rock, pirates of the carribean 1,2 n 3, deja vu, national treasure, bad company(i likd dat) con air,
berverly hills cop

Genius Dos

A butcher in his shop, and he's real busy, and he notices a dog in the shop. He shoos him away. But later, he notices the dog is back again. So he goes over to the dog, and notices he has a note in his mouth. He takes the note, and it reads "Can I have
12 sausages and a leg of lamb, please. The dog has money in his mouth, as well."

The butcher looks inside and, lo and behold, there is a ten pound note there. So he takes the money, and puts the sausages and lamb in a bag, placing it in the dog's mouth. The butcher is well impressed, and since it's close to closing time, he decides to shut up shop and follow the dog. So off he goes.

The dog is walking down the street, when he comes to a level crossing. The dog puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then he waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the lights to turn. They do, and he walks across the road, with the butcher following him all the way.

The dog then comes to a bus stop, and starts looking at the timetable. The butcher is in awe at this stage. The dog checks out the times, and then sits on one of the seats provided.
Along comes a bus. The dog walks around the front, looks at the number, and goes back to his seat. Another bus comes. Again the dog goes and looks at the number, notices it's the right bus, and climbs on. The butcher, by now open-mouthed, follows him onto the bus.

The bus travels through the town and out into the suburbs, the dog looking at the scenery. Eventually he gets up, and moves to the front of the bus. He stands on 2 back paws and pushes the button to stop the bus. Then he gets off, his groceries still in his mouth.

Well, dog and butcher are walking along the road, and then the dog turns into a house. He walks up the path, and drops the groceries on the step. Then he walks back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door. He goes back down the path, runs up to the door and -Whap!- throws himself against it again. There's no answer at the house, so the dog goes back down the path, jumps up on a narrow wall, and walks along the perimeter of the garden. He gets to the window, and beats his head against it several times, walks back, jumps off, and waits at the door.

The butcher watches as a big guy opens the door, and starts yelling at the dog. Kicking him and punching him, and swearing at him.

The butcher runs up, and stops the guy. "What the hell are you doing? The dog is a genius. He could be on TV, for heaven's sake!", to which the guy responds, "Genius me butt - this is the second time this week that he's forgotten his key!"

M. Night Shyamalan's of sixth sense, unbreakable n the village
all with a twist @ d end
ss and qt are both great
what of these guys that did the rock n enemy of the state amongst others? i 4got d name now mayb later

not queer at all. take your time

Farting Contest

An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few minutes the old man farts and says,"Seven Points." His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?" The old man replied, "It's fart football."

A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says, "Touchdown, tie score." After about five minutes the old man farts again and says, "Touchdown, I'm ahead 14 to 7."

Not to be out done the wife rips another one and say, "Touchdown, tie score." Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeaker and says,"Fieldgoal, I lead 17 to 14."

Now the pressure's on and the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains really hard but to no avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he has but instead of farting he soils the bed.

The wife looks and says, "What the heck was that?"

The old man replied, "Half-time, Switch sides".

dont step on me!! are u blind?? (Scent of a woman) Al palcino


salma hayek- y dont u invite ur friends? banderas- they will destroy the city (Desperado)

A gentle man does not disscuss such- 13th warrior (banderas)

, but u go in pieces ASSHOLE (dark angel) dolph

Police Academy
The Saint (Val Kilmer)
Ronin (Robert DE Niro etc)
Brave Heart (Mel Gibson)
Shangai Noon (Jackie Chan)
Anna & the king (Chow Yun Fat)
After the sunset (Pierce Brosnan, Salma Hayek)
Desperado (Banderas)
Ordinary decent criminal (Kelvin Spacey)
Man in the iron mask (Di-Caprio, John Malkovich, Jeremy Irons}
and lots more

Wrong Expression

"Doc," says Steve, "I want to be castrated."

"What on earth for?" asks the doctor in amazement.

"It's something I've been thinking about for a long time and I want to have it done" replies Steve.

"But have you thought it through properly?" asks the doctor, "It's a very serious operation and once it's done, there's no going back. It will change your life forever!"

"I'm aware of that and you're not going to change my mind -- either you book me in to be castrated or I'll simply go to another doctor."

"Well, OK.", says the doctor, "But it's against my better judgment!"

So Steve has his operation, and the next day he is up and walking very slowly, legs apart, down the hospital corridor with his drip stand. Heading towards him is another patient, who is walking exactly the same way.

"Hi there," says Steve,"It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me."

"Well," said the patient, "I finally decided after 37 years of life that I would like to be circumcised."

Steve stared at him in horror and screamed, "Shit! THAT'S the word!”

how about this
q; so tell us, did she make u or did she finish u?
a; a gentle man does not discuss sych

Happy Birthday To Me!

A woman decides to have a facelift for her birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home she stops at a newsstand to buy a paper. Before leaving, she asks the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 32", the clerk replies.

"I'm actually 47," the woman says happily.

A little while later, she goes into Mr Bigg's, and upon getting her order, asks the counter girl the same question. She replies, "I'd quess about 29."

The woman replies, "Nope, I am 47." Now she is feeling really good about herself.

While waiting for the bus home, she asks an old man the same question. He replies, "I'm 78 and my eyesight is starting to go. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was, but it requires you to let me put my hands up your shirt and feel your boobs. Then I can tell exactly how old you are."

They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of the woman, and she finally said, "What the hell, go ahead."

The old man slips both hands up her shirt, under her bra, and begins to feel around. After a couple of minutes, she says, "Okay, okay, how old am I?"

He removes his hands and says, "You are 47."

Stunned, the woman says, "That is amazing! How did you know?"

The old man replies, "I was behind you in line at Mr Bigg's."

mine is just 4rm my passion 4 ian flemmings writting, sean connery acting and its 2007