₦airaland Forum

Happy new month to all our readers. Wishing you all the best the month of September has got to offer and the rest of the year.

As you enter this month, i hope you love freely without limits and conditions. Love as a soul unchained, as one who is not shackled by the pains of yesterdays. Love as if there existed no threat of incurring heartache in return. Love from a heart that refuses to be enclosed in ice. Love from a heart that defies imprisonment behind the iron bars of mistrust.

Demonstrate love at all times and place no limit on it. Let it be a symphony that stirs your soul, a battle cry that beckons you to extend compassion to all, irrespective of culture, religion, political views, and other statuses that separate us more than they unite us.


Be a manifestation of the highest and purest forms of love, think kindly of others, assist those in need even in the most trivial of gestures. Use your gifts, talents and skills to bring hope and healing into a world that struggles under the weight of despair and discouragement.

Smile at strangers in passing and speak only what is helpful toward uplifting a kindred spirit. Speak with the knowledge that every utterance has the potential to serve as balm for a weary soul. Your words possess vibrations and these vibrations can either create a world of peace between you and others or cause disharmony and destruction.

Never serve pride above love, as pride will never serve you well. Embrace vulnerability and express your love at all times. Proclaim 'I Love You' as if tomorrow may never come. Hold hands with the dear one beside you to remind them of your affection and envelop others warmly.

Abandon all misgivings and all unforgiveness. Holding on to these things will bar fulfillment and love from entering into your heart. Set yourself free from these negativities and experience the peace that awaits you.

Wherever your journey takes you, cherish the love you have to offer others. Live it, share it, show it, be strengthened by it, find sanctuary in it so that at the end of your life on earth, you may look back on the years behind you and experience bliss in your soul at having lived a life of radiant, joyful and world changing love.

Have a wonderful and fulfilled SEPTEMBER!

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/09/relationship-tips-september-month-of.html#more

There is a brutal conflict between custom and smugglers in Seme border along Badagry road. If you know anyone travelling towards that route, please, call alert them to get back. A serious gunfire war is on right now and more than a dozen custom officers have been confirmed dead.

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/breaking-news-gunfire-war-between.html

Mobsync: ^^^lol, the two of you are very funny .

By the way, how can I comment on this topic?

u just half killed me with laughter n i'm managing d remaining life to type this comment .....lmao

This is really funny! Who knew police could be this fun? Three Metropolitan Police officers engaged themselves in a light hearted dance with the community in the ongoing Notting Hill Carnival. They will probably be punished for not doing their job but i think they did just fine. They didn't only keep the crowd at ease, they built a positive relationship with the community, showing that the police are not drones but humans who care; and they succeeded in making the crowd focus on the fun not violence.
Police keeping the crowd at ease are police keeping peace. They deserve a pat on the back
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/metropolitan-police-dance-of-at-notting.html


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-E_tikSXfc

I weep for my country Nigeria.

Nollywood diva, Genevieve Nnaji, speaks out about the rumored interview she had with a media house when she declared she prays to have a husband and kids. The actress said via her twitter and instagram handle that her last official interview was with Genevieve Magazine and anything aside that is false.
She wrote:
"My last official interview was with @GenevieveMag. Anything else is either false or as old as my career. #Justsaying"

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/any-rumored-interview-is-false-or-as.html

In an interview with Channels TV 'Rubbin' Minds' with Ebuka Obi-Uchendu, Nollywood actress/songstress Tonto Dikeh denied ever dating Iyanya and said she only met him on few occasions and that the rumor about their triangle relationship was a mere publicity stunt.
When asked if she dated Iyanya or if they are just friends, she answered by saying:

"It's surprising because when i just tell people i have met him like just once or twice, people don't believe it. I don't know him. Although, i admire his work and i like him, i could say i love him as a fan too because his music are very good to me. But then, i don't know him personally."

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/tonto-dikeh-denies-dating-iyanya-says.html


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujA2aV4QiA8

[img]http://www.nairaland.com/attachments/1269903_png-10-1_png3333366a9405fe4038d23dfe41b9a8ad[/img]

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BRkyxPSCYAErt6K.jpg
https://twitter.com/cozanigeria/status/367380666091986944
Christianity is seriously taking another shape as you can now pay your tithes, offerings, redeem your pledges and sow your seeds online. What else can i say other than Nigerian pastors are really 'making all things new.'
COZA is definitely going to be on news for some more time as the head pastor, Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo, is involved in a sex scandal with one Ese Walter which he has refused to address and now he is in for an online offering to God. #heheheisitdownlook!

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/you-can-now-pay-your-tithes-offerings.html

Watching the inhuman act of these so called peace soldiers breaks my heart. Are these soldiers human? were they born by women? or they were popped out from d anus?

Maj. Headache:
The same highly disciplined Military that produced rogues like Babangida, Obasonjo and Abacha that have plundered and institutionalized corruption and mediocrity.

The same military that has no qualms in engaging unarmed civilians (preferably their own citizens in their own country)

The same military that is full of crass spineless bullies

The same Nigeria military that cannot tackle a ragtag Islamic sect operating in open semi-arid desert.

The video below is from the civil war in Sierra Leone.
For those of you scrounging on a poor waif data plan, the video clearly shows Nigerian army personel taking their frustration on a half naked teenage boy who was hiding for his dear life in one of the many abandon buildings. A sniper had just killed a Nigerian Army officer and the barbarians took it out on this young innocent poor boy.

Gallantry indeed.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUcTb1i9184

I think the ambassador to Canada should see this. How can you close an embassy because of some consular duties...without notice, after giving appointments to people? Nigerian embassies around the world are all alike. They act so Nigerian-like even outside Nigeria. Corrupt people with no respect for people and the law.
I'm not surprised at what Oluwakemi Ola said "I'm not Canadian yet; but the moment i become Canadian, i'm burning this passport. I'll burn it and I'll never in my life get a Nigerian passport.."
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/nigerians-in-canada-laments-over-level.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFNjgvz9NZ8

The joystick of a father of three has been chopped off by five assailants as punishment for dating the girlfriend of one of the attackers. The victim, whose name was given only as James, a married man and final year student of Gbewaa College of Education in the Upper East region in Ghana, was attacked on campus on Friday August 23, 2013. The assault happened in broad daylight on the College’s campus.

It was reported that the attackers ambushed the victim, overpowered him and severed off his joystick after confronting him about dating their colleague’s girlfriend, Comfort.

Police in Pusiga have arrested a young man in connection with the alleged crime. The four other accomplices are on the run. Comfort is also in the custody of the Police helping with investigations. James is currently receiving treatment at the Akonye Memorial Hospital. Crime Officer of Bawku, Adamu Seidu, who confirmed the incident said James joystick was completely severed off with a knife.
Click on the link below to see the uncensored pix
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/omg-married-mans-joystick-cut-off-in.html

I'm so laughing my heart out right now. An Australian friend of mine sent me the above snapshot and captioned it "Only in Nigeria" lol
This story reads : "Police in Nigeria are holding a goat on suspicion of attempt armed robbery. Vigilantes seized the black an white goat, saying it was an armed robber who had used black magic to transform himself into an animal to escape after trying to steal a Mazda 323. A spokesman for the police in the eastern state of Kwara said : "The goat is in our custody. Vigilantes saw some hoodlums attempting to rob a car. One escaped while the other turned into a goat."

Really?! Nigeria Police will kill me with laughter and bring bad publicity to themselves. lolzz

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/police-arrest-goat-in-kwara-state-over.html

If you are a Nigerian artist, you need to be celebrating right now as COSON (Copyright Society Of Nigeria) signs big reciprocal agreement with PRS for music based in London. This means that anywhere your music is being played in the United kingdom, you are going to be paid for it.

This agreement formalizes the mandate to COSON to manage in Nigeria the extensive repertoire of world music controlled by PRS for music while PRS for music will ensure the collection of royalties on behalf of COSON in the UK and other territories where PRS operates directly or indirectly through its affiliates.


The agreement was concluded during a visit to London by COSON chairman, Chief Tony Okoroji. Reacting to the development, chief Okoroji said "The signing of the agreement between COSON and PRS for music if proof that the world has taken notice of the significant progress COSON has made with respect to the collective management of copyright in Nigeria. Nigerian artists can now feel confident to churn out world hits knowing that wherever in the world their music is utilized, there is a worldwide network heavily protecting their interest."
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/nigerian-artists-celebrat-as-coson.html#more

Men of the world, here's a piece of advice: There are many ways to bring happiness to your Joystick, but sticking a fork into it isn’t one of them.

A 70-year-old Australian man was rushed to the hospital after he attempted that very feat. According to a report published in the International Journal of Surgery Cases earlier this month, the Canberra man was admitted to the hospital with "bleeding urethral meatus" after he stuffed a 4-inch fork into his urethra in an attempt to achieve sexual gratification.

Fortunately, the report says the fork was successfully removed using forceps and "copious lubrication."

According to the report's authors, this isn't the first time that a man has attempted to insert a foreign object into his nether regions. Pens, safety pins, telephone cables, glue, cocaine, straws, marbles, light bulbs, carrots and snakes, among other strange things, have allegedly been found stuck in joysticks in the past.

"It is apparent that the human mind is inhibited let alone creative," the authors concluded.

Needless to say, wedging objects into one's peen is a hazardous activity. According to a 2010 study on the subject, the "urological consequences of this type of behavior can be significant and the implications for patients can be serious including death from sepsis."
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/an-australian-man-stuffed-fork-into-his.html#more

WARNING: Graphic images.
For those of you who are bold enough to see the real picture of the fork being removed, click HERE http://download.journals.elsevierhealth.com/pdfs/journals/2210-2612/PIIS2210261213002320.pdf

solarj05: For the sake of some of you who always ask for estimate i have decided to upload this as a guide. The prices i put here are subject to change due to unstable market prices. The Treatment tank i put here has the capacity to be used for 2 sachet machines and one bottle machines (to express it in a non technical way for everybody to understand) and it is a fabricated one made by me. it guarantees a perfect water quality.



WORKPLAN FOR ESTABLISHMENT OF SACHET AND BOTTTLE WATER FACTORY IN NIGERIA.

CITYVINE CONSULTING SERVICES


OBAFEMI AWOLOWO WAY, IKEJA, LAGOS.
08032800595, 08184144390.

STEPS TO PRODUCTION
1. Register a Business Name
2. Register a Trademark
3. Buy equipments and machines
4. Install equipments
5. NAFDAC registration
6. Production commences.


LISTS OF EQUIPMENTS AND PRICES
SACHET
New Used
1. Automatic machine 280,000 170,000
2. Treatment Plant 150,000 80,000
3. Storage Tanks 120,000 120,000
4. UV Sterilizer 15,000 15,000
5. 3 surface pumps @ #8,500 25,500 25,500
6. Installation Materials 25,000 25,000
7. Treatment chemicals 25,000 25,000
8. Micro Filters 20,000 20,000
9. Air Sterilizer 5,000 5,000
10. Installation Cost 80,000 80,000 (including purification system)
745,500 565,500

ADDITIONAL EQUIPMENTS FOR BOTTLE
11. Automatic Bottle Line 1,700,000 1,000,000
12. Bottle Moulding Machine 1,500,000 1,000,000 (optional)
13. Ozone Generator 250,000 250,000 (optional)

NAFDAC COST BREAKDOWN
Sachet only bottle only both sachet and bottle
1. Bank draft 35,000 55,000 90,000
2. Raw water analysis 15,000 15,000 15,000
4. Treated water analysis 15,000 15,000 30,000
5. Processing fee 50,000 70,000 80,000
TOTAL 115,000 155,000 215,000

OTHER REQUIREMENTS BY NAFDAC
1. Business registration
2. Trademark registration
3. Fumigation of premises
4. Medical certificate of fitness: (for all the staffs)
a. Sputum test
b. Urine test
c. Stool test
d. Chest x-ray
e. Widal test
f. Heaf test
5. Retainership Agreement with hospital
6. Retainership Agreement with public analyst
7. Company letter head paper
8. Inspection materials:
a. Rubber sandals
b. White overall
c. Head gear
d. Hand glove
e. Nose and mouth protector
f. First aid box (duly equipped)

OTHER EQUIPMENTS NEEDED
1. Delivery Van
2. Generator (at least 12KVA/15KW/10hp)
3. Building (duly fenced)
4. Borehole or other source of water.


PROFITABILITY ANALYSIS
1 machine can produce 600 bags to 800 bags in a day
1 bag cost N60 to N100 (depending on your location)

USING THE WORST CASE SCENARIO:
N60 x 600 bags = N36,000 per day sales

Cost of production
Cost per bag is N24(average cost)
N24 x 600 bags = N14,400 per day


Profit per day:
N36,000 – N14,400 = N21,600

Monthly calculation of profit:
N21,600x 26 working days= N561,600
Less provision for monthly contingencies N100,000
N461,600

On a worst case scenario, you will make notting less than N400,000 (NET) monthly.


OUR SERVICES
We offer the following services:
• Business Name registration
• Trademark registration
• Comprehensive fumigation services
• Comprehensive analysis of water, drug, cosmetics, juice and any kind of food item.
• Installation and training.
• Nafdac Registration Services.

Other than the highlighted services, we offer full consultancy engagement as clients demand.

CONTACT: 08184144390.

If these things are needed and it cost about N5million, how come you quoted one can start up with N500,000? How will one manage N500,000 in a biz that requires N5million?

A Brazilian woman has reportedly sliced off her husband's penis with a bread knife after she caught him cheating on her with another man.

The woman had waited several days before taking out her revenge on her 28-years-old husband who didn't know she had found him in bed with a man at their home in Santos, Southeast Brazil.

The woman suggested they play out a sexual fantasy in which she would tie him up in bed, and he readily agreed to it. When he was completely immobilised, she took a bread knife from the kitchen and sliced off her husband's manhood.


The man and his penis were rushed to the hospital but the organ could not be saved. Doctors described his condition as stable but he would probably have to use a catheter for the rest of his life.

#Cheating is vile and cheaters do not just expose themselves to diseases, they also endanger their partners along the way. There is really no reason to be sleeping with a man when you are married to a woman... and many women have gotten HIV from their husbands this way. All he had to do was tell her he doesn't want her anymore. However, there is no good enough excuse to f**k with someone's private part. Cheating is vile but cutting off someone's private part is inhuman. Ladies, just because you are mad at a man for whatever reason doesn't mean you have the right to chop off his willy. Men, stop toying with your partners emotions and lives...women can be mean.

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/weirdo-woman-sliced-off-her-husbands.html#more

Nigeria is a country where influence covers everything, a land where even if you are heavenly qualified and you have got no backbone or highly placed godfathers, you go nowhere. A country where someone who cannot read, teaches.

How can a teacher who reads to her audience/students for a living be dumbfounded by stage fright? I think a teacher should be able to read even in their sleep.

This is the case of Mrs Augusta Odenwingie, a teacher who teaches at Asologun Primary School, Ikpoba Okha Local Government Area of Edo State. Mrs Odenwingie couldn't read a sworn affidavit she tendered as part of her credentials when the Edo State governor, Gov. Adams Oshiomole, paid an unsheduled visit to the State Staff Training Centre venue where the verification of certificates of Primary School Teachers in Edo State is going on.


On arrival at the venue, the governor took time to go through some of the teacher's credentials and documents presented and when Mrs. Odenwingie took her turn for the exercise, the governor who listened to her defence asked her to read the affidavit she presented along with her documents. Mrs Odenwingie started stuttering and read the affidavit like a kindergarten pupil who is learning to read.

The governor who was shocked that a teacher could not read said "If you can't read, what do you teach the pupils? What do you write on the board?"

Comrade Patrick Ikosimi, the chairman of the Nigeria Union of Teachers (NUT) who was also at the screening to monitor the exercise, described the teacher's failure to read properly as an embarrassment.

I think this exercise should be conducted in all states of Nigeria because primary education is a fundamental education for a child and it's very important to state and national development. If the fundamental education of a child is poor, it goes a very long way to affect the child's academic performance in the future. I can't deny the fact that many factors might have been the cause of the teacher's inability to read; it may be that she has eye problem, or the affidavit wasn't clearly written, or it was tension, or perhaps, she was intimidated by the governor's presence.., because this is not the first screening she has gone through in her career. Inasmuch as there are so many reasons why she failed to act like an abled teacher, such abnormalities should not be condole in public services.

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/scandal-edo-state-primary-school.html#more

It has been discovered that the sergeant who was dismissed from the Nigeria Police for extorting money from a citizen has been impersonating his classmate for over 21 years.

Information gathered by Channels Television revealed that Osugwor festus and not Chris Omeleze is his real name.
A source, who chose to remain anonymous, said that the "real name of the dismissed policeman is not Chris Omeleze. His real name is Osugwor Festus from Umuseti in Ndokwa West LGA of Delta state. He was classmates with Chris Omeleze...,they attended Ndemili Grammar school and finished in 1987.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/shocker-dismissed-sergeant-over-bribery.html


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2oNHK5fa2w

After watching this video, i wonder how many innocent people are dying silently in prisons without being able to prove their innocence.
Donald Andrews Jr, an African-American and a New York business owner's surveillance camera saved him from a 2-7 years jail terms after his shop cam captured an undercover police informant planting and photographing a crack cocaine in his shop, which led to his arrest.

The police had become suspicious of Donald Andrews who owns a smoke shop on Mohawk Avenue in Scotia, New York, and an undercover police informant was sent to the shop twice.


It was during the informant's second trip to the shop that he was caught on camera planting and photographing what appeared to be cocaine.

Andrew was arrested for a crime he didn't commit and was later released when he produced the incriminating video evidence recorded on his seven-camera surveillance system.

Schenectady County Sheriff, Dominic Dagostino, said that proper procedures were not followed; he however placed the blame on the undercover informant who has allegedly escaped.

Meanwhile, Andrew is in the process of filling a wrongful arrest lawsuit.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/man-saved-from-jail-after-camera-caught.html


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gna4-FRIJn4

Usain Bolt once again proved he is the best ever after winning an incredible sixth World Championship gold medal with victory in the 100m final in Moscow.
The sprint king won the race in a winning time of 9.77s, ahead of American Justin Gatlin and fellow Jamaican Nesta Carter in third.
Congrats to him!

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/breaking-news-usain-bolt-wins-sixth.html

Sergeant Chris Omeleze of Lagos State Command Motor Traffic Division, Force number 192954, who was caught on camera demanding for bribe has just been dismissed from the Nigeria Police Force. He was found guilty as charged in an Orderly room trial that was concluded earlier today.

In as much as i'm against what he did, I still think dismissing him is not the best solution because at the end of the day, he will end up being an armed robber. I think an alternative punishment should be given to him.

Nigeria is a country where it is allowed to punish a poor policeman but political hoodlums eat their cakes and still have them.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/policeman-caught-on-camera-demanding.html

The Nigerian Policeman that was caught on camera demanding for bribe has been arrested by the police. The announcement was made known via the Facebook page of the Nigeria Police, although, his name was withheld but it was revealed that he is a Sergeant with force number 192954 and he is attached to the Lagos State Command Motor Traffic Division.

"ARREST OF UNETHICAL POLICEMAN CAUGHT ON VIDEO.
The Policeman involved in the unprofessional and shameful act as seen in a video clip currently in circulation on the social media has been identified. He is a Sergeant with Force Number 192954 (Name withheld) attached to the Lagos State Command Motor Traffic Division (State MTD). He has been arrested and currently in detention awaiting the commencement of his orderly room trial (Nigeria Police version of court). The Inspector General of Police IGP MD Abubakar has directed the Commissioner of Police Lagos State to ensure that the orderly room trial is concluded in record time. The IGP therefore reiterates his assurance to the public of his zero tolerance to any form of corrupt practices involving any Police officer. He equally advises citizens to take advantage of the use of the Nigeria Police Force’ complaint email address; policemonitor@npf.gov.ng which guarantees their confidentiality in forwarding all manners of complaints of unethical conduct involving any police officer or security agent for necessary action.
‪#‎NigeriaPolice‬"
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/breaking-news-nigerian-policeman-caught.html

After two kids, Peter Okoye of P-Square finally asked Lola Omotayo, the mother of his kids to marry him. The dude asked ask in a big style, placing an engagement ring, flowers, and a card where he wrote "please say yes" placed on top of a Range Rover. Uhm...who wouldn't say yes? Congrats to them both.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/she-said-yes-peter-okoye-of-p-square.html

Nigeria police is your friend abi? See how friendly they can be by collecting bribe from you to set you free or arresting you if you can't afford to bribe them.
I couldn't upload the video here, so plz click on the below link to watch naija police negotiate bribe at the Murtala Muhammed International Airport, Lagos.

http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/busted-nigerian-policeman-caught-on.html

I wonder why Nigerians continue to celebrate 'lootocracy'. They honour looters, terrorists, militants, assassins etc. Uhm...only Nigerians can make a mad man look sane and make a sane man look mad. If he were to be a common criminal, no one would want to associate with him, but now that he is a rich criminal, everyone want to be recognized with him. Nigeria my beloved country! The land where mad men direct traffic and the supposedly sane people follow obediently....Is there really any hope for this country?

On Sunday 4th August 2013, the people of Oghara in Delta State celebrated their former governor in grand style on his 55th birthday. Although, the ex governor, James Onanefe Ibori, is currently serving his jail terms in a London prison for fraud, his admirers and political associates gathered to celebrate him. The celebration started with a Thanksgiving service at the Baptist Church, where the pastor, Rev Iweh Godspower, challenged the congregation to emulate Ibori.

While the Rev was preaching, he asked:

"What is that aspect of ibori's personality that could attract such mammoth crowd which filled the church and overflows outside?"

He answered his own question by saying:

"It is given that Ibori is a huge success, but that is not why all of you have left your homes and different towns to be in Oghara today; even though the man you have come to celebrate may never know the individuals that have come to do him honour. You have come to Ogahara today because Ibori is a man who after climbing high in the social, political and economical ladders of Nigeria, he did not seize and throw away the ladders in the way most Nigerian big men usually do; he made the ladder available for others to climb up too. And even when some people are too weak to make good use of that ladder, he helped pull them up. That is why you are here today. Never forget that and you go and do likewise; help others to climb up the ladders of life and love." The crowd applauded him and others bellowed Ibori's nickname "Odidigborigbo of Africa."

The three days celebration ends today with a topflight novelty football match at the Oghara Township Stadium.

http://www.mjemagazine.com/emulate-james-ibori-pastor-advice-nigerians/
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/emulate-ibori-pastor-advice-nigerians.html#more

Yesterday, Linda Ikeji posted on her blog about Eva Alordiah confessing to child molestation on HotFM Abuja Breakfast Show with Tutu and Cheezy Charles.
The rumor didn't go down well with the Nigerian rap queen as she took to Twitter to confront Linda over the issue. She tweeted
"@lindaikeji wouldn't it be nice to ask questions before publishing shit & making it look like Jesus rove on limousines?"
She didn't stop there, she went on to tweet

"And in the end, gossip Bloggers would be.... Well, gossip Bloggers."
Six hours later, Linda Ikeji replied Eva tweeting
"@EvaAlordiah Lol. I see u're beginning to believe ur own hype. I listened to ur interview, u said it, I quoted u, how is dat shit? #dntblameu"

Eva, i'm sure no one needs to confirm what was aired. Linda, take it easy oh...these are the things that goes with blogging and we know why u nor blame her.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/tweetfight-eva-alordiah-diss-linda.html

This is so hilarious. In as much as i love and adore kids, watching this advert gave me cold feet. It's an award winning spec advert for Durex condoms. It's an excellent depiction of what may lie ahead if you (guys) are not careful with your willy. The slow motion movie builds the misery of fatherhood. The unkempt yard, the overcooked hot dog, the wild kids that won't stop running around, the screaming wife, the fake smile, etc.This is a wake up call for the guys to protect themselves before they get this far. lolzzzz
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/guys-this-hilarious-condom-advert-shows.html#more


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiiN_AME1bQ

This is serious! How on earth is this possible? A 64-years-old Dominican man,Geraldo Ramos, woke up with no penis after blacking out drunk the night before. The man said he simply cannot recall the point in between being drunk and being rushed to the hospital for emergency surgery on his dismembered member.

Eyewitness claims Ramo was drunk, naked and attacked by a dog but the dog allegedly responsible is yet to be found. In an interview (in Spanish) with Ramo, he said this is a wake up call for him to lay off the booze.
I wonder what he drank that he couldn't feel his member being munched off his body.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/wtf-man-wakes-up-with-no-penis-after.html


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLb0YJYMstw

Oya oh...guys...wake up...put on your dancing shoes and get your rings ready!!! Karen Igho has officially announced that she is single and needs a husband. She doesn't needs you to be extraordinary nor does she needs you to be rich or tall with six-pack chest like P-Square, all she needs is for you to be God fearing and love her.
"I'm very very single...if there is any guy out there that thinks he can be my Mr.right, holla...call HipTV...halla them...let's hook-up..." Listen to what she said and holla at her if you are interested.
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/i-need-husband-call-me-if-interested.html


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgcmmehSfpg

maxwello.yg:
I read the topic and laughed my ass off. Then I read the content and my ass came back. It was not funny. Ops!

See http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/9japolicebelike-trend-nigerians-diss.html and you will understand where d story is coming from. HILARIOUS!!!

immortalcrown: This one is a joke.

it's no joke oh...go check it out on Twitter and u will lol

I just can't stop laughing....! This ‪#‎9japolicebelike‬ trend is damn hilarious that even a sadist will laugh out loud. While the Nigeria Police on Twitter were trying to stop the trend on Twitter, they tweeted "WARNING: BEWARE THAT ANY THING YOU TWEET WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU IMMEDIATELY...TO BE FOREWARNED IS TO BE FOREHARMED".
This warning got people laughing the more and even Tonto Dikeh couldn't help but laugh. Her laugh got her into trouble with the police who threatened to arrest her if she doesn't stop laughing. Tonto replied that she was with them,.....and then got an epic advice from the police..lol "STOP SINGING AND FOCUS ON ACTING"
http://www.allaroundgist.com/2013/08/9japolicebelike-nigerian-police-warns.html