₦airaland Forum

kitakoli: I saw her with ARMS and AMUNITIONS online dat day 2....

Omoh! Shey you want them to hang Tonto.

Dikeh had on June 28, 2013, posted photographs of a wrap of hemp and grains of the weed formed into the letters, ‘Happy birthday POKO.’
She also posted a photograph of herself with the inscription, ‘Mi smoke ganja mi smoke weed while my haterz smoke ma gossip.’
In an interview with our correspondent on Friday, the Head, Public Affairs, NDLEA, Mr. Mitchell Ofoyeju, saidthat Nollywood stars had been prosecuted for drug-related offences.

http://www.punchng.com/news/tonto-dike-ndlea-probes-more-celebrities-for-hard-drugs/

BetaThings: So did this reliable source make the information available to anyone
Otherwise someone can also say that the sky was clear in Tegina or Azare and they did not sight it
Should we not be co-ordinating rather than just calling cities at random?

Yes, the Emir of Yawuri ordered it to be announced to the public as tomorrow is the first day of Ramadan.

BetaThings: So did this reliable source make the information available to anyone
Otherwise someone can also say that the sky was clear in Tegina or Azare and they did not sight it
Should we not be co-ordinating rather than just calling cities at random?

Yes, the Emir of Yawuri ordered it to be announced to the public as tomorrow is the first day of Ramadan.

New moon been sighted in Yawuri. This marks tomorrow as the first day of Ramadan. Please if you have anyone to contact in Yawuri you can do so as it has been witnessed by many according to a reliable source.

BOKO HARAM vs ISLAM!

1) ISLAM: There is no compulsion in religion.
BOKO HARAM: Everyone must adhere to our ways else…

2) ISLAM: Love all and be just to all regardless of religion.
BOKO HARAM: If you are not with us you are against us.

3) ISLAM: Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) lived with peaceful Christians and Jews as his neighbours.
BOKO HARAM: All non-Muslims must leave the North.

4) ISLAM: You are only permitted to protect yourselves when you are attacked first. And you should retaliate justly but when u gain an upper hand, u shld better forgive and leave everything to Allah.
BOKO HARAM: We attack all who stand in our way

5) ISLAM: A true Muslim is one from whose tongue and hands his community is safe.
BOKO HARAM: We do not care your religion. Muslim or Christian we will crush any who stands in our way.

6) ISLAM: Killing of innocent souls is a great sin. No human being has the right to take life except through the due process of the Law.
BOKO HARAM: Allah will understand. He will not punish us.

7) ISLAM: During war, non-combatant women and children must not be touched. Talk less of peace time.
BOKO HARAM: We kill men, women and children.

ISLAM: At war time, all non-Muslims that run into their places of worship or their homes will not be harmed. Talk less of peace time.
BOKO HARAM: We bomb non-Muslims in their places of worship. We also kill Muslims in their mosques and homes if we feel they are a threat to us.

So who really are these people with warped ideologies and intents?

I may not know what they are really out to achieve but I do know for sure they do not represent Islam. Rather, they are acting contrary to it's most sublime teachings: peaceful advocacy.

Of course, Islam strongly disapproves of corruption and incapable leadership!

LET'S WORK TOGETHER, REGARDLESS OF TRIBE AND RELIGION TO PROVIDE A BETTER TOMORROW FOR ALL. May Allah help us all!

See as everybody is claiming to be an introvert.
Your case is not being introvert rather you guys are under the spell of confusion and disorganized ways of living a life in this country Nigeria. In other words YOU GUYS ARE DEPRESSED.

Vanishing of swagger remain constant.

The Federal Ministry of Education has refuted reports that President Goodluck Jonathan had made a U-turn on the change of name of the University of Lagos.

It said on Friday that it had yet to receive any categorical statement from the Federal Government on such a decision.

www.ngscholars.com/2013/02/unilag-remains-maulag-ministry-of-education-insist-on-name-change/

And it came to pass that on the fiftieth year of the slavery of the tribe of the owners-of-black-gold-but-hewers-of-stone in the deep south, God gave ear to their cries and hearkened. And there was a man named Jona the teacher who was of the house of Fedora. And God came upon Jona in a dream and saith: “lo, I have seen the affliction of your people whose black gold hath been stolen these past fifty years to build other peoples’ tents to the north of the river; I have heard the cries of your people on account of their taskmasters from the desert. Indeed, I know their sufferings and I have come down to deliver them from bondage and to place on their tongues the milk and honey that floweth out of the abundance of their land for the first time in their lives. So, come, I will send you to the city by the Rock in the land of the taskmasters of the desert and place you on the great throne from whence cometh all power.”

And Jona fell on his face and saith: “my Lord and my God. Be it done to me according to thine will.” And the word of the Lord came to pass and Jona the teacher was indeed placed on the throne of power after death hath looked upon King Yarus of the tribe of the desert taskmasters who had gone to seek healing from the descendants of Ishmael in the land of Arabia. And there was great rejoicing among the tribe of the owners-of-black-gold-but-hewers-of-stone in the deep south for the hour of their redemption is indeed come.

And they lifted up their eyes unto the mountains and sang:We have overcome We have overcome We have overcome today Oh deep in our hearts We do believe We have overcome today And their leader, a fiery patriarch called Clarkodemus, saith unto the desert taskmasters of yore: “touch not Jona my anointed for who God hath blessed no man can curse!” And after the new King Jona had burnt a thousand offerings, the Lord appeared to him in a dream and saith: “because thou hast found favour in mine eyes and art now king, ask whatever you want and it shall be granted unto thee.”

And King Jona did obeissance and saith: “my Lord and my God, great indeed is thy faithfulness. You have been kind to me your servant by making me king and to my people in the deep south by giving us dominion over the black gold of our earth that was taken away for fifty years by our taskmasters from the desert.

Therefore, I would have asked of thee wisdom and a discerning heart to rule over this 160 million people; I would have asked of thee knowledge to distinguish between right and wrong but, unfortunately, King Solomon already asked for all these things so many years ago before me.”

"My lord and my God, being my own man, I do not want to copy the requests of King Solomon. Seeing that my people in the deep south have suffered and never made merry in fifty years, I ask that you grant unto me, my wife, and the guardian-warriors of the black gold of my people the years of Methuselah whereupon we may live forever to make merry and recover the locust years we lost to our taskmasters from the north.

Grant unto me the wisdom to make merry with the shekels that cometh out of the abundance of black gold in the land of my fathers. Let my mouth sayeth unto my servants: bring forth musicians to play the horn, flute, zither, lyre, harp and all kinds of music for that which was taken by our taskmasters in the north has been rendered unto us tenfold. King Solomon asked for wisdom. As for me and my household, we have decided to make merry.”

And the Lord saith unto Jona the King: “thou seeketh the shekels of thine inheritance to make merry?” And Jona the King replied: “we shall also buy the best robes for our guests and we shall put rings on their hands and shoes on their feet. We shall kill the fatted calf and buy the best wine from the bridegroom’s store in the land of Cana And we shall say unto our guests: rejoice and be glad for that which was taken from us hath been restored”And the Lord cast King Jona away from His presence. Whereupon King Jona’s heart hardened.

Foolishness and pride took dominion over his mind. And he sent forth for all the guardian-warriors of the black gold from the land of his fathers and saith: “come thou now into the kingdom of this world and partake of the bounties which hath been added unto our inheritance. Thine bellies shall be the bellies of our people. Whatever thou eateth shall be considered eaten by our people.”

And the guardian-warriors of black gold who hath lived by the sword and by blood in the creeks and the bushes made haste to the city by the rock. One was called Tompolus the Mighty and the other was called Asarius the Ijawmite.

And they came into King Jonah’s presence and did obeisance. Whereupon great joy is come unto King Jona’s heart upon seeing his brothers. And the king saith unto the guardian-warriors: “brothers, I welcome thee into our inheritance. Look at this great city by the rock, look northward and southward, look westward and eastward, all that you see was built with our black gold and upon our backs by our taskmasters of yore. Now eat and let us make merry for that which was taken from us hath been restored tenfold.”

And there was great rejoicing among King Jona and his brothers from the creek, Asarius and Tompolus. And they invited the palace servants to partake of the great feast. One was Orontus and the other was Renokrim, also of the creeks. One was Dokupemus, a moneychanger who hath robbed people in the land of the farmers in the middlelands and the traders in the east before he found favor with King Jona as a trumpeter. The other was Reuben the Ogunite, a junior trumpeter to Dokupemus.

And when their bellies hath filled with food and wine, Dokupemus and Reuben cried forth and saith unto the assembly of King Jona and his brothers from the creek: “though we come from the land of the merrymakers to the west, it is meet that we spit on the land of our forbears and adopt your land. The gods of your creeks shall be our gods and the ancestors of your creeks shall be our ancestors.”

And it pleased King Jona and Asarius and Tompolus what they heard from these two servants whereupon King Jona saith: “Dokupemus and Reuben my humble servants, our gods shall be your gods and our ancestors shall be your ancestors.”

And they made merry.

And nights passed.

And mornings came.

And life got worse for the tribe of the owners-of-black gold-but-hewers-of stone in the deep south even with their son as king; and nothing changed for the other people all over the rest of the land.

And when a great famine and pestilence came upon the land, the people of the creeks became agitated and cried up to their son King Jona: “give us bread and shekels.”

And King Jona rent his clothes in anger and saith: “lo, you people of the creeks, for three years now I have killed the fatted calf for our guardian warriors, Tompolus and Asarius. Their bellies are your bellies. Whatever they eat into their own bellies is sufficient unto the people. I have given Tompolus dominion over the waters and unto Asarius I have given billions of shekels.”

And nights passed.

And mornings came.

And the people of the creek were hungry still.

And they came unto King Jona their son and saith: “give us bread and shekels and water that we may wet our parched throats.” Whereupon King Jona saith unto his people: “Lo, I still feed Tompolus and Asarius. Their bellies are thine bellies. When they feed, thou art fed. When they drink, thine thirst disappears. Go now in peace.”

And nights passed.

And mornings came.

And the people of the creek were hungry still. But in the fourth year of King Jona’s reign, he sent his servants forth into the creeks with a message for the people.

And King Jona’s servants went to the creeks and saith unto the people: “lo, the time is come to choose a new King for the great throne of the land in the city by the rock. Behold the evil taskmasters to the north, the greedy traders to east, and the lousy merrymakers to the west covet the throne of our son, King Jona. It is meet that we come together to secure the throne of our brother who hath fed two great bellies in the last four years. For he took our brothers Tompolus and Asarius out of the creeks and bushes and made moneychangers of them.

And when they fed, the people fed, when they drank, the people drank, for their bellies are the people’s belly. Let not our enemies to the east and to the west and to the north visit iniquities upon our inheritance.

And one poor fisherman who hath seen years and suffering rose and saith: “lo, it is true indeed that our son hath been King in the last four years but pray, how doth the food and the wine move from the bellies of Asarius and Tompolus into my belly? For I have known hunger in the last four years of King Jona our son like I knew hunger under our taskmasters from the north.”

And great anger is come upon the servants of King Jona. Whereupon they called their centurions and saith: “take this ungrateful fisherman and cast him into the lions’ den. For he knoweth not that the hunger you suffereth in the hands of your son is sweeter than than the hunger you suffereth in the hands of strangers. He knoweth not that the thirst inflicted on you by your brother is sweeter than the thirst inflicted by strangers. He knoweth not that when two of us eat, like brothers Tompolus and Asarius are eating from the table of our great King Jona, even so the multitudes are automatically fed, for their stomachs are the stomach of the people. Cast this fisherman away and let it be said that though the Nazarene son of a carpenter fed the multitude with five loaves of bread and two fish, our King Jona hath performed a greater miracle these past four years for he fed only two bellies and the whole creek was fed. So let it be written, so let it be done.”

By:Pious Adesanmi

[quote author=Richy.]Thank you for letting me know that it is a word. if you were so well updated as you claimed, you would have known how to spell "vocabulary". I do not have time for kids learning English language. [/quote]Oh my..... you really catch me on this typo. Anyway, no wahala, we jam next time.
Remain blessed.

[quote author=Richy.]Hmmm was that the grammar you learnt today? Someone asked for your advise, all you could chip in or do was being sarcastic. [/quote]PHANTASMAGORIA is not GRAMMAR. It is a WORD (a noun in this case).
Yes, it is a new word to me that means my vocablary has been updated.

[quote author=Richy.][color=#660000]A school might have only 6 teachers my Brother. It happens a lot in Bayalsa state especially Government school. the teachers only show up on pay day just to sign and disappear again. they have chains of businesses in the city, so they give the principal something on pay day for him to shot up. then the principal will request 13 or 14 corps members to cover their ass. I am saying this out of experience. we were 15 that served in one school.The most annoying thing in those days was that You will repeat what you were trying to pass across to the student numerous times, they keep looking at you like ST LUKE. some just keep smiling sheepishly. some of our members began to teach them in pigeon English. it was really funny.[/color][/quote]Mehn!!! This guy as a graduate really needs PHANTASMAGORIA treatment.

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This is the only healthy way to watch this final.

Nonsense, can't you see the hind leg. The person who made this crap is an amatuer photoshop learner.

I came across these MEN (yes MEN) that looks like ladies even finer than some ladies. They achieved this by undergoing plastic surgery

Please don't argue, you can google "Nong Poy" and "Nong Toom"

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ghettodreamz: Culled from the meaning of "Retar-d". That word is an offensive one. A mentally handicapped person (often used as a general term of abuse). And commonly used by some Nairalanders to address their opponents or someone they have ill will for, e.g GEJ.

Oh my GOD! So, it means these guys are referring to the whole president of this country with the above definition "Mentally Handicapped" because I know the meaning of GEJ means goodluck ebele jonathan.

Thank you for this info bro.

Have been seeing this word on nairaland for long yet to get its meaning. Can someone help me with its meaning. The word is RETERDEEN

Parnassuss: THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH...AT LAST

You 're welcome

RIPA + Rest In Peace in Advance
Tis happens only in Nigerian community when one of them is going to be hanged in Malaysia or any country, they will RIP the person before being hanged

ayusco85: What about IMO?

IMO = In My Opinion

pro01: What is your point? In Nigeria, the official language is English, which means that EVERY graduate - regardless of how "productive" he or she purports to be - is expected to be fluent in the language. Is that not why English is a COMPULSORY subject for ALL courses in tertiary institutions?

Having gone through primary, secondary, and tertiary education, what excuse does one have not to be fluent in the language in which he or she acquired all their education? This also applies to the Chinese people you alluded to. They don't need to speak English to be productive because they are did not learn their productivity in English. It's as simple as that.

How do I ascertain your "productivity" when you cannot even communicate effectively in YOUR own language? Yes, English is our language, NOT a "foreign tongue". I'm sure no one in Nigeria receives formal education in their native language.

If you're a "productive" engineer, how did you read and assimilate the engineering textbooks (written in English) in school? How did you pass your exams? How do you study manuals?

Let's stop making excuses for dullards abeg!

Excellent! Excellent!! Excellent!!!

What about this yoruba ancestral tribal marks

[quote author=tpia@]i think you have deep seated issues which need intensive treatment.

what are you expecting from this type of thread, besides promoting racism, xenophobia, hatred and immoral behaviour.

you're one of those psychos who think they'e normal, simply because they have some hacking job somewhere.

remember, you have no power beyond what God has allowed you to have, and the day your master, satan, decides he's finished with you, that's the end.

typing lies will get you nowhere.[/quote]C' mon, relax, life is easy, why making it difficult for yourself. Ogini!
You are going too hot. It is about history not war.
Easy baby, cool down and enjoy life.
By the way, what about the apology?

OgidiBoy: Tpia@ is a bro now ?

Allah be praised nothing is impossible in this world.

My Holiness, I swear I thought Tpia is a male, chineke mei. Adingara maga bobi* kind of speaking in tongues*
I 'll correct it now now.
Thanks bro (hope you are a bro) for reminding me.

[quote author=tpia@]People with characters such as the op, never end up well sha.

Very unfortunate, but you cant change what you are on the inside i guess.[/quote]Hey sis (initially "bro" ) take it easy, we are promoting culture not hatred. It is a way of knowing, studying and getting acquinted with one's history. As some may not have known that this was the original authentic yoruba tribal marks as it was many centuries back. They only know the modernise contemporary version of it. So, I am expecting e-apology from you in particular, and all those that initially mis-understood the intent of this topic in general.

/\ /\

This one is a modernise version of the real authentic one.

What can you say about this YORUBA picture in relation to their ancestral culture.

What can you say about this YORUBA picture in relation to their ancestral culture.