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Blacksta's Posts

Nairaland Forum › Blacksta's Profile › Blacksta's Posts

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Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 4:19pm On Aug 20, 2010
Bob was removing some engine valves from a car on the
lift when he spotted a famous heart surgeon, who was standing
off to the side, waiting for the service manager.

Bob, somewhat of a loud mouth, shouted across the garage,
"Hey , Is that you ? Come over here a minute."

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where
Bob was working on a car. Bob in a loud voice, all could
hear, said argumentatively, "So Mr. fancy doctor, look at this
work. I also take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and
when I finish this baby will purr like a kitten. So how come you
get the big bucks, when you and me are doing basically the
same work?"

The Doctor, very embarrassed, walked away, and said softly,
to Bob,, "Try doing your work with the engine running."
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 4:14pm On Aug 20, 2010
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the
playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child.

Smiling sweetly the teacher said, "When I was a child, I
was told if I made ugly faces I would stay like that."

The student looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you
can't say you weren't warned."
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 4:11pm On Aug 20, 2010
Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and
after the wedding, laid down the following rules: "I'll be home
when I want, if I want and at what time I want - and I don't
expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on
the table unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing,
boozin, and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and
don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules.
Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand
that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night - whether
you're here or not."
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 4:07pm On Aug 20, 2010
Idowuogbo:
i sense addiction yet anoda thread
but any how me wa spoil bodyy

a woman was pregnant and she was overdue by a week
doctors told her to turn to sex as it mite help induce her a bit
woman went home and told her igbo husband ,
her husband shouted chai chineke doctor wicked oo na me go take preeek chuk my pikin for head wen d pikin come out na dentations for full my pikin head , wen time reach wen pikin suppose begin school dem go call am Holario
grin
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 4:06pm On Aug 20, 2010
This 75 year old woman had a vision one night, she saw
and spoke to God. She asked him, "how much time do
I have to live." He said, "you have 35 years left."

So that whole year she had a ton of cosmetic surgery, she
had a face lift, a tummy tuck, her nose reshaped, liposuction,
she completely did herself over. She figured as long as
she was going to live another 35 years she was going to
look young again. After all this was done, that same year
she was hit by a car and was killed instantly.

When she entered St. Peter's gate she walked over to God
and said, "What happened? I thought you said I had
another 35 years." God replied, "I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE YOU!"
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 4:00pm On Aug 20, 2010
SCHOOL TEST ANSWERS

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 3:59pm On Aug 20, 2010
DAMN KIDS!

A farmer in the country has a watermelon patch and upon
inspection he discovers that some of the local kids have
been helping themselves to a feast.

The farmer thinks of ways to discourage this profit eating
situation. So he puts up a sign that reads, "WARNING: ONE
OF THESE WATERMELONS CONTAINS CYANIDE!

The farmer returns a week later to discover that none of
the watermelons have been eaten, but finds another
sign that reads: "NOW THERE ARE TWO!"
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 3:56pm On Aug 20, 2010
Cyhoney

I no wan derail thread - before Ben 10 ban me - So need a suitable medium - so i can dance alanta for u grin
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 3:45pm On Aug 20, 2010
cynthoney:
u messed me up,now tell me

y sud i be for u?
<blackie sobs  cry > I bind that demon of woman pulling. >

Anyway i have  decided to move from England to France.  grin
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 3:34pm On Aug 20, 2010
[quote author=Ben-10 link=topic=500438.msg6607987#msg6607987 date=1282314411]Is that not Studio? tongue grin[/quote]Stop on bro
cynthoney:
blackie,wat is this?! angry
Haba babes - r u with me or against me kiss
Jokes Etc › Re: Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 3:32pm On Aug 20, 2010
Q: Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?

A: He wanted to see what High School was like!
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 3:30pm On Aug 20, 2010
cynthoney:
yes,a heart made of steel!

where is everyone?
That means i go need catapillar kind love to break that one - grin
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 3:26pm On Aug 20, 2010
cynthoney:
sorry babes,im back being bizz

wetin dey happen for here?

Efe,wats d latest?
Honey boo - I am sure you r back with a new heart. wink
Jokes Etc › Revamp Of D Spoil Bodi Small Edition Series 1 - I Am Back. by blacksta(op): 3:22pm On Aug 20, 2010
A drunk staggered out of a bar, swaying and stumbling all over the place, barely able to put one foot in front of the other. He eventually managed to reach his car, but just as he was about to try and open the door, a police officer tapped him on the shoulder and said: "I hope you're not thinking of driving tonight, sir?"

"Of course I am," replied the drunk. "I'm in no fit state to walk!"
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:58pm On Aug 20, 2010
Has Nuthin to do with me I think na ileke idi the person dey yan
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:49pm On Aug 20, 2010
jennykadry:
Just saw you reply on the omotola's locked thread and wanna clarify sthg. I did nt type the idiotic, I typed ileke idi dont know where the idiotic came from
You most def from Yaba left .  tongue
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:47pm On Aug 20, 2010
sledge406:
Blacksta, take a bath
Lol - I don baff untop transformer - Your turn and see if i no connect am back to the grid.  tongue
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:43pm On Aug 20, 2010
[quote author=Efemena_xy link=topic=498991.msg6607677#msg6607677 date=1282311729]Oh my baby's back!!

**Efe runs to him, throws her arms around his neck and covers him with kisses**

**MY**kisses**sweet**kisses**baby!!**kisses**
[/quote]Obese kissing  tongue
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:33pm On Aug 20, 2010
[quote author=Efemena_xy link=topic=498991.msg6607591#msg6607591 date=1282311019]Men kissing virus na berra ting o!  tongue[/quote]I forget say you sef dey suffer from kisslomatinilsitcs  grin
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Let's Kill English Language by blacksta(m): 2:30pm On Aug 20, 2010
jokingmary:
shocked

those is ma student grin
impossiblcant - she is expelling cause she not doesing the tisha - in forestazation.
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:28pm On Aug 20, 2010
Maka abi na waka - wey your sidekick - they wey give u kissing virus
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:27pm On Aug 20, 2010
lysaa:
Who is sledge? wanno give his post some credit? can't u see how i ignored it?
hmmm  -  Sledge ke ? that one belongs to studio  - lol
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Let's Kill English Language by blacksta(m): 2:22pm On Aug 20, 2010
[quote author=Ben-10 link=topic=492003.msg6607525#msg6607525 date=1282310396]googles, in my absence. . .telling me everything that happen.[/quote]why u choosed yahoozing googles
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:18pm On Aug 20, 2010
Idowuogbo:
oga no aba gals are bricklayers now wink grin grin grin
grin
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:12pm On Aug 20, 2010
[quote author=Efemena_xy link=topic=498991.msg6607462#msg6607462 date=1282309861]Nothing lost my brother - I be wan cry but seeing as you dey in middle of fight

na I say make I siddon watch the show. . . tongue

you run when im hot for here - oya settle all your babes now. . .but nor spread urself thin sha tongue[/quote]I dey try - na u be my mentor - How bodi abi vicks dey for eyez
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Let's Kill English Language by blacksta(m): 2:08pm On Aug 20, 2010
hello crass - hoping the engrish crass is speeding smoothlingy
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 2:04pm On Aug 20, 2010
Efe

wetin lost - u don cry finish .
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 12:46pm On Aug 20, 2010
lysaa:
i know who i am. .who are u?
Haba - wetin do you memory - u travel or this jail sef - dem don release u - anyway welcome back

Efe don dey look for u - your beloved twin sista

grin
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Let's Kill English Language by blacksta(m): 12:37pm On Aug 20, 2010
lysaa:
shakes head in disappointment.
your heading might fallen off - tongue
Jokes Etc › Re: ~ Jokers Offtopic Amusement Park by blacksta(m): 12:34pm On Aug 20, 2010
lysaa:
pleased to meet u a-again but my mind slips me. Er. .abeg, could u introduce yasef? huh
grin or u introduce yourself. lol

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