₦airaland Forum

1Sharon:
Marriage wouldn't stop people like this! He has an addiction and it need to be cured.

Really, I thought it would, I’m already looking forward to possibly getting married soon if possible next year and have access to sex as long as I want I guess.

Mosdiii:
I am also battling this addiction. I love women so much presently I am dating 5 girls simultaneously including other girls who i still meet. I am 35 years old and very comfortable. The strange thing is that all this girls are below 24 years old. I just don't know how to stop this sex addiction

Oh really you in similar situation, that’s sad, are you married?

I hope we both find redemption and salvation

brodalikeme:
So many people on the platform, giving wrong, senseless advice because they don’t understand your pain.

I feel your pain of addiction. I have been there. What you are doing is unnatural and will destroy you beyond what it had already done to you. I know aside escort, onlyfans, masturbation, there will be others too. Pornography is certainly part of this corktail as well. I’m also sure you do alcohol. I know, I have been there.. Sexual sin I’d one of the most ravenous vices to fall into. It’s will cause you stagnation, dis favour, poor self assessment etc.
The truth is that you can quit all of these. I know you can, your spirit is already resisting these lifestyle. You need to start taking radical steps to overcome all these.
YOU CAN OVERCOME ALL THESE TODAY IF YOU WANT. If I can be clean, then you can. If you want we can talk.
I pray for you, and I break the hold of satan over your life. May the spirit of God guide you, live big inside you and give you the grace to overcome sin in Jesus name-amen.

I think you understand my situation very well, though I don’t do alcohol or smoke but I do the rest. It’s so hard and I feel like I’m in a hole, I lost my virginity at 13 in ss1 and it’s been off and on, but of recent it’s been terrible so so terrible , cause of the money I’m spending on escorts and onlyfans models .

Though I didn’t do it , but I once almost paid about $1,500 for an hour to a IndecentStar that stays in Buffalo New York and was willing to drive to New York to see her , it’s about 1hr drive from Niagara Ontario . But I didn’t do it though , but the thought of doing it alone scares me, I’ve watched so many of her videos and wanted to experience it in real life . It’s terrible.

I need to turn away from this path otherwise it would completely destroy me totally .

LIVINGICONREBOR:
Only you can save yourself.
You are still quite young but this is when you really need to put in the work on yourself. If you have a high libido what stop you from having a sex partner over there rather than wasting your resources on different women?

You used the right word, wasting valuable resources, I would break up with my girl In Nigeria and then look for someone here

eniolorunfe:
I think part of your problem is the negative terms or negativity you are attaching to the fact that you have a high libido. You first need to accept that s*x is a beautiful thing and accept that aspect of yourself. This is where therapy comes in. If you’re serious about therapy, go seek help from a professional therapist in Canada. They can’t be that hard to find.

It’s also obvious that long distance relationship is not working for you, so look for someone who is within your reach for a committed relationship. Make sure you both are sexually compatible, it’s a must!

Hmm, would work on breaking up with her, though she didn’t do anything to me at all, I just feel bad breaking up with her , but I need a partner here that would help out and all I guess

carl90:
common !
Is the church the only place you can find a nice lady over there in Canada.
really ?

Not the only place but I guess the easiest and fastest, cause I think lots of Nigerian girls are there

ValCon888:
You don't have game that's why escorts are ruining your life.

I guess you right, if I did probably should have had a girl now I guess

LIVINGICONREBOR:
Do you know how many people are willing to trade places with you right now? You are in Canada and you still want to throw your life away. Please don't be unfortunate.

I know, I mean I literally saw myself personally through school and paid over 40k in fees . But lately I’m loosing focus cause of this act , it’s terrible and shameful . Just struggling badly

LIVINGICONREBOR:
True true, this one nah case of person wey get cap but no get head. Damn!! 🥱

You right I guess

carl90:
Is there no beautiful lady over there at Canada you can have as a girlfriend or build a relationship with ?
do not put so much hope in this long relationship with your girlfriend here at Nigeria .
Personally ,I do not even fancy long distance relationship.
Life is too short for that.
You can't have so much cash with you and still be paying to have sex with a woman.
It does not make sense.
Get a good woman over there at Canada and build a
serious relationship with her.
Life na once o.

There are but I barely go to church where you find them a lot,

Mikespecialone:
Focus , my brother .......... Find someone to marry and make sure she likes Sex too ..... then problem solved

I guess so too, marriage would solve all this for good

Meteng:
As in, you’re knacking ashawo?

Technically escort but I guess you right

RealityKings:
You are at the age where you should have a permanent woman spend the night with. If you can look for a woman and marry her or sign a contract with...
Its just nature telling you what is next. Nature wants you to have a partner. Getting married is the best solution to masturbating and patronizing hookers.

I was listening to an Islamic cleric who said, there is a demon that influences masturbation by the time an average male is matured to have a wife but refuses. This age spans from 17 upwards.

It made me think back and remember the age I started sleeping and waking up with Wet Dreams. So normally, for a male, by the time you are 17 to 20 and unmarried, masturbating will set in because you are not meeting "Nature's Standards" except if you are lucky to get a girlfriend during this phase.

Now you are way matured you need to get a constant or permanent woman.

This is quite enlightening

JustPowerApps:
The solution is more women

You setting me up for further destruction lol

HopeVictor:
I'd have suggested masturbation but una go say na bad thing.

I sadly engage in that too since 2013 in my first year in university.

I just spent $350 last night on an escort and $15 on onlyfans
For a 1hr session with the escort , after going about 2 weeks without doing anything then I fell back again .

I’m thinking of breaking up with my girlfriend and telling her the truth . She’s always seen me as an angel but clearly I’m a terrible person .

ActiveFarms:
Have you considered saving those money and use it in financing your girls trip to you so you can get married and contained ?

She’s in nigeria, and Canada visa process takes a really long time . I considered coming to Nigeria but I’m even scared cause I don’t trust myself at all. I might be seeing upto 5 different girls a day, cause of how cheap hookup is in Nigeria, I think it’s like 100k or so,

Hence why I’m afraid of visiting ,

I don’t know why this lust/burden is on me . It’s been going on for a long time, for a period I think it’s all gone away, then I see a beautiful picture on Instagram and from there it goes downhill .

Yugoslavia247:
Look for a homeless gal and date. Give her house and food. She will pay you with sex.

Make sure you sign contract. And make sure she falls in love with you.

Forget your gf. Is it the money you spend that is paining you or the sex.

It seems like it is the money thst is the problem

Honestly , the money part , then the sex part too . Cause it’s my saving I keep depleting and using . I feel worthless

Hi guys,

I thought I would have overcome this act by now, posted awhile back about my lust with women and escort, and how I’ve been spending so much on escorts more than $300 per session and from 2022 till date have spent over $20,000 on both escorts, onlyfans models and all. I have a girlfriend I’m in a long distance relationship with in Nigeria , but haven’t told her about this part of me and this my addiction issues. I tried seeking a therapist but it was a pastor and lots of judgemental things were attached to the therapy session, I couldn’t continue with it.

Honestly I feel so lost especially after seeing the escorts or paying, it’s affecting my work and can’t focus at work or anything, the little savings I have , all have been depleted, I try to save back and in a week I can go all out and deplete it again

I need help / guidance. I’m 27 years old living in Canada

I’m just lost and like I posted I think last year and was advised against it, I feel marriage would help me or make me stop.

PastorOlokonla:
You will have to create new good habits to combat old ones. Go out more, make new friends. Read a lot of books.
Remove yourself from environments that enables bad habits. Its all a mind game my brother and nothing special about sex, if you let it control you, it will destroy you and your wife.

Also, there are good therapists in Canada that can work with you.

Yh I guess they are good therapist, already in talks with scheduling a session with one

Bolt458:
bro, I try dat shit wen I first land. When I realized how much I was losing, I give myself brain

Oh really, how did you approach it bro

Though so far haven’t told any of my siblings about this my terrible and shameful act

In the last born , they are all married and here in Canada and United States .

But I feel terrible telling them as I would break their hearts and all . Especially my mum, it would shatter her.

Just few friends that know, hence why I feel comfortable on this faceless forum and feel like pouring my heart out here.

So far I almost did it again recently but I quickly overcame it, wasn’t easy that day as I had to masturbate like 5 times for the konji to totally die off

PastorOlokonla:
It wouldn't stop after marriage.

Sorry to break it to you.

Meaning I have to figure it all out before getting married otherwise I would be cheating even in marriage badly

Lord help me

Ilekokonit:
I think what could break the temptation is non availability of funds.

You could try opening an online savings account that only allows you to withdraw twice a year and you just make 2 withdrawals of $1 each on Jan 1 and 2 and then you cant withdraw until the next year when you then repeat the cycle. Also avoid credit cards which may allow you to withdraw cash at the machine. In fact, avoid loans and credit cards and from your salary only leave in your account what you need for the basics and transfer the rest into this 1 year account.

This will slow you down at least by your not having access to cash easily and you should also tell your mum and siblings not to lend you any money i you ask the. Tell them you are saving for a mortgage.

Actually if you have that kind of money, what about getting a mortgage even if it is a little one so that the bulk of your money will go to paying off your monthly mortgage and the good thing is that that house you buy will pay off in 25 years time and will be a good source of additional pension. All rent is waste by the way.

Delete your only fans and Instagram accounts so that you don't get tempted by those women and if it means changing your phone number / sim card to avoid those women that already have your number, then so be it. The end justifies the means.

Good luck.

This is really smart and a good way to go. Hopefully it helps , and hopefully I can also work on the after effect which is reducing my masturbation too

Gerrard59:
You are a rich man o. You need strong therapy and spiritual prayers as backup. Very strong one. I recommend Mountain of Fire Ministries. Go to the headquarters o. But sorry to inform you, you won't get regular sex from your wife, especially after childbirth and above two children.



Which means you don't have a girlfriend in Canada. The question is: why? Since being in a committed relationship will reduce your "going outside" to satisfy yourself.

I’m working on it. I’m 26. Would be 27 this year. Really working on getting a girlfriend .

Rickmann:
Pls try to seek counseling.

I’ve started talking to close relatives and friends about it.

And also trying to use the money to buy things for myself when the konji hits

But another issue is my masturbation has increased greatly. I can masturbate like 6 times in a day .

That’s another issue too

Anashe:
It's good you're willing to stop, and it's an important first step. But you should go to therapy before subjecting another person's child to this habit. Without seeking proper help, I'm afraid you won't stop after marriage because your wife will not always be able to (pregnancy, childbirth, life, etc.)

Wow from the comments now I’m scared, cause that was really my main aim of getting married to help solve this issue

imagrg:
Don't blame him oh...toto scarce for Canada oh.

It is technically

Psady:
End it before it kills you.
Since u got that desperation of coming out and stating your bad ordeal about it then truly u serious about stopping it. I was once in your kind of situation but I took that bold step of ending it by getting married , but u need a good and understanding woman,I tell you it's basic step to end such addiction.
Just work on yourself by determining not to live such demeaning life anymore.

Oh nice, I think I would accelerate my plans of getting married too. I just feel it would help solve the problem to a large extent

Bfly:
Is losing money to it the problem or what?

Loosing money is one but the guilt that comes from the act is another one too

Rickmann:
What?
Omo, that's close to 15million naira.

Yh it’s an expensive thing to engage in especially in this part of the world . Imagine what I could have done with the funds . Maybe even gotten a land back home or helped someone in serious need

fyzaila:
When you don't kill/stop fornication it will definitely kill you.

I sincerely believe this . Need guidance