₦airaland Forum

Blissfully naughty, you're right, it is new. I know very little about Nigeria or the people from there. That is why I started to read up on this site to begin with, so that I could have some insight on where he comes from, his culture, his country, and his customs.

cvide, yes I do. He treats me good and I treat him good in return. A relationship is give and take. I wish he were a bit more open with his thoughts but I guess that will come with time.

As for the comment about him being a gentleman because I'm white, Hmmm, I very much doubt that the color of my skin has anything to do with how he treats me. He's a gentleman because I am a lady.

Sistawoman must be a quite the sweetheart then.

Vexxy, you wrote this like a poem.

"love is a rainbow of colors

It's blue because it can bring peace and tranquility
It's green because it can cause envy
It's yellow because it radiates
It's white because it can be innocent
It's red because it can be a danger zone
It's black because love of the wrong thing can cause death
It's pastel colors because it can be young and soft
It's bold colors because it can stand out, make you take notice
It's plaid because it can be confusing

Love is a splendid array of colors and patterns, interweaving causing both happiness and sorrow, joy and pain, forgiveness and hatred.

Love is. . . . unable to be defined by words or expressed in colors."


You're very talented. You should get that published, you could make yourself some mad money.

Well, if he is right, and in a few months I have some guy walking ahead and bitching at me to walk faster then he can walk by himself!

What a man has to do to get me, he has to continue doing to keep me.

I don't NEED him. I LIKE him but he should never make the mistake to think that I'm desperate enough to stay with ANY man who doesn't treat me right. I am a good woman who treats my man with only the best and I expect it in return. A man should NEVER think he is irreplaceble!!

A handshake to a stranger, a hug to friend, a kiss to my love.

Dr. Tony, I never really thought about going to Nigeria, but if the opportunity arose then I have no reason to say no. Life is an adventure that must be lived.

well thanks for that advice. I have to say, I realize I am not like most women. I am far from needy, I am not jealous, I hate drama and I am very strong mentally and emotionally, I am not submissive and if I need something then I get it for myself and I don't need anyone's approval to do so.

I don't need a man, I want one, there is a big difference, lol

hmmm, what does 'wbb' mean?

Marriage and children changes everyone because priorities shift so I don't think that has much to do with culture.

I did learn something new from him last night, he told me he wanted to take me dancing on saturday night, which I think is great but he's working most of the day into the evening (12 hours) and I don't want him to go out of his way for me especially when I know he will be tired, I told him that we could just watch a movie or something that would take less of his energy. He made sure to tell me that he does things for me because he wants to and for no other reason and if he didn't want to dance with me then he would not have offered.

He has a bit of a stubborn streak, we might butt heads over that in the future, but with every arguement is an excuse to make up.

Thank you all for that information, He is very cool headed. And I do praise him because he has a job that he works very hard at and he also returned to university at 33 years old to better his life, so he doesn't sleep alot and is always at work or school, what little spare time he has is for me, I always let him know that I am impressed and proud of him for working so hard to improve his future. I don't expect anything from him because I am quite capable of getting anything I want for myself, so maybe that is why he tries so hard to make me happy.

I mainly call him 'sweetness'!

I truly believe jealousy is one of the most negative emotions you can bring into a relationship. It will only feed into the destruction of both of you. With jealousy comes doubt and lack of trust. Without trust, you have nothing.

haha, no no, no need to voodoo him or anything, lol

I'm just trying to learn about his background and how relationships usually work in your culture.   I wish he were more willing to discuss things but he was hurt badly and trusts very little.  So instead of pushing him to talk about something he is not ready to discuss, I am trying to learn on my own.

I believe in lust at first sight. Lord knows nice tight abs on a man have had that effect on me a time or two. lol

But seriously, How can you love someone you don't know??

You want a submissive woman who listens to you?

This is not the stone age, you don't beat down an animal with a hammer and drag it back to your cave for some woman to cook it over a burning pile of wood.

It's 2009, get a grip!!!

Whether you stay or go is in equal proportion to whether you truly love her or not. So do you love her enough to stand by her? Or do you walk away using the excuse that she lied to sooth your conscience?

I hate to say it but she just isn't interested and doesn't know how to say it. She doesn't want to hurt your feelings so when confronted by you, she's making excuses why she didn't call, don't waste your time on a girl who's just not into you. Sorry sweetheart!

Hmmm, Interesting. I have high expectations so I know I'm not easily satisfied.

But, shouldn't the question be,

Do you really want a woman who is easily satisfied

Girl A needs to have a bit more confidence in herself and realize that she's worth a lot more than he is offering her. If a man can't make her his first and only choice then she needs to get rid of him because he is not worthy of her love. She may love him but time heals all wounds and she will move on, stronger and better for the experience.

Girl B, if she knows about Girl A, is just a tramp and loves the challenge of winning over the guy but will get rid of him once Girl A loses interest.

The guy, is a dog!!! Woof!!

[b]I'm a white Canadian woman in a relationship with a Nigerian man.  The differences in culture are still new to me so I thought this would be a good way to learn about him since I believe where you come from is a big part of who you are. 

So far, he is quite sweet.   He opens the car door for me, takes me out to movies and dinner, he holds my hand when shopping in stores and compliments me all the time.  I have heard that Nigerian men are not generally romantic and yet he is, or at least he seems to be.

I really do care for him and I guess I am hoping to get some insight in how he thinks and feels from people who share his background.  He is definately someone who's actions speak louder than words because he does plenty for me but is not very forward with discussing his feelings.  Any insight any of you care to share is appreciated.  Thanks!