₦airaland Forum

bellong:
I don't think you have been around. I sent you messages but never got delivered...

We should talk.

Really?

Where? BBM? Haven't used that in almost a year.

Let me see if I can connect you on Hangout.

bellong:
where have you been

My oga...lol. I've been around o. Busy and all.

How is madam and big boy?

skylowlow:
Caracta

How many monikers do you have?

Please don't talk to me

You guys should stop attacking him left, right and centre. At least he has made his intentions known. He is far better than many irresponsible fathers and husbands who have lots of children out of wedlock and baby mamas they don't even care about.

He has stated his terms of agreement and what he wants. He didn't ask for opinion or advice. Even if you have to counter his opinion, do it without insults please. You don't know his story. Though his moniker threw me off but I've seen enough cyber bullying to know we have no right to 'cyber-judge' anyone.

nahzyla:
You will be there for them how? Will you live under the same roof with them?

What will you do to stop them from suffering the stigma of being called bastard.

People don't even call them 'bastards''. The upgraded version is "children of contract" or simply 'benefits'

The world is evolving. Whatever rocks their boat.

FannySwindler1:
Caracta. Thank you for your input. Who will look after the kids if surrogate? I want then to have a good life with father and mother present. Two is ok by me. Don't want more than that. Are you interested or you had like to be a surrogate.

We have babysitters and nannies everywhere. You can never give the children a good life by staying apart. I guess you have carefully considered all options. It's your choice though. All the best.

And no I'm not interested. Not even qualified. I have undivided loyalty to my hubby

Marriage is sweeeet!

Only two kids?

But why?

Why not just get a surrogate?

Funjosh:
Oh my Caracta how are you doing and Oga, you sha not let me come chop owambe for Akure Diaris God o.

No vex jare. Many more owambe still ahead.

What a thread!

Interesting. All pages loaded.

Oldies (NL seniors) are back from hibernation.

Kobicove:
Why would the management of an establishment accept responsibility for an item that was stolen in an 'open' area?

If you were the owner of the company would you accept readily accept responsibility without proof?

Do that and you would be inundated with spurious claims form members of the public with regards to loss of non existent items in your outlets

A reasonable company would protect every customer that transacts business with them as much as they need to. It's just common sense and the right of a consumer, except if stated otherwise.

Now the issue is not even accepting responsibility, but lies, deception, lack of empathy, outright disregard for the claims of a customer.

@OP, why did you leave without making a video ehn? Let's put the fear and respect of consumers/customers in companies like this.

1miccza:
It's been like centuries can we still talk?

Sure. You can send an e-mail

1miccza:
How have u been?? You must be mad at me right now .

Nah.

Acidosis:
Caracta, HML

Thanks

1miccza:
Of course it is but the stories from those in it here are giving me goose pimples

Yeah. I can imagine.

ThatBoheemyan:
Ok, share your experience with us.

I'm still a fresher

1miccza:
Seriously i am shivering right now

Lol. What's wrong with you guys? Marriage is cool!

daveP:
If its a fact, then maybe 'men' can even qualify for the 'keep denying' category. But unfortunately, we both know it aint a fact. Unless our definition of it differs. I dont key into that 'women are ALWAYS the victim' stuff. Perhaps a derivative of societal EXPECTATIONs from a man!!

This isnt just a gender defence talk(i cant blast guys' attitude). Its just ive seen lots and im still learning; even from on here.

Let us face it, the society expects much more from the women. A man can have 200 children out of wedlock. A man can have a side chick. A man can decide not to sleep at home for days, and so on and so forth. Nobody crucifies him for all that. Because he is the head of the family. When there is no peace, the woman gets blamed, oh she is too stubborn and disrespectful. When there is no child, oh the woman must have done series of abortion or she is possessed. When the man loses his job, oh the wife has brought him bad luck. When the child breaks an arm or leg, oh what a irresponsible mother...and so on and so forth.

Let there be some sense of responsibility on both sides. That's my point.

Everybody screaming 'bleaching' up and down. Can't somebody be naturally light-skinned again? I don't understand how you guys spot 'bleachers'. And I'm not just talking about this Olori.

I do not envy light-skinned girls at all. To some Nigerians, heavily-pancaked light-skinned girl with filtered photos has bleached her skin.

daveP:
what happen to we men o? is this a comeback with some permanence?

Lol. No. In many divorce cases I know, the woman is always the victim, everyone sees her as "not good enough" irrespective of the man's bullshit package. Even if the man is 60, he is still encouraged to move on and marry again.

Also, every woman has a limit. There is a breaking point. She could keep forgiving and tolerating her man's nasty attitude until she gets to her limit. At that point, she forgives you, tolerates, but has stopped loving you. That doesn't make her a bad wife, just a wife that has lost the connection.

Like Ujujoan2 and Efe said, you just have to manage expectations and acknowledge that no two people can ever have the same ideologies and understanding at every point in time. Of course, you can have a peaceful and loving marriage. Don't go into marriage believing it's going to crash like all others out there. Don't go into marriage prepared to fight and protect your sanity. Don't wait for your spouse to make a mistake so you could say, "I talk am". And if your spouse nags or complains about a certain attitude of yours, why not change or prepare to change? Would it kill you? It's all about compromise. Doesn't make you the stupid or weak one.

Just be prepared for the differences, take it one day at a time, live it, love it, enjoy it, triumph in it.

Viking007:
Yeah right, women are just victims. What a "brilliant" comment.

She is actually right to an extent.

And we know we also have dangerous women out there. But our men...? Hmmmm.

Finally a thread that speaks a lot...a thread to learn from.

Marriage is a lot.

I still feel year 0-5 has lots of challenges. If you can get it right at this stage, then you've got things covered.

I see a lot of pretty scary divorce cases and I feel so sad for the children involved. How could love turn bitter? What makes a one-time sweetheart a forever-time enemy?

Honestly, marriage is a lot.

Ishilove:
Caracta darling! Happy birthday dear

Thanks ma'am

Really? Naptu2?

Wow. Then why am I not half as smart as he is?

Happy birthday to Naptu2, my birthday-mate.

daveP:
Caracta tops ma list....

Awwww. Same same here.

SSBN:
I'm suffering from the following : this is a statement of fact.

Schizotypal personality disorder.
OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder.
TMAU (this is what destroyed my social life completely)
Mild form of Tourette syndrome.

......Yeah I know. .ONLY ME. Such is life.

Hmmm. Quite a list.

You are still better than some people out there. I guess you don't believe that huh?

Find what makes you happy and calm and don't believe all negative medical reports.

You'll be fine. Stay strong. *warm hug*

She did a wrong thing. However, I strongly believe something must have prompted her action. Perhaps, you did something that hurt her feelings previously or she found out something she didn't like about you or she found someone better.

Either ways, no person in love, none, would see his or her partner in need and not show concern. Why is your conscience giving you doubts about your action?

Take a step back. Review your relationship. Review your partner. Give time to heal and don't dwell on her shortcomings. Pray. Things will fall in place. The more you flog the issue, the more you hurt yourself.