₦airaland Forum

Retardeen.....

Oduntan Gabriel: 1st to comment ooooooooo, oluwa ose ooooo.... Thanksgiving in a jiffy

Retardeen.....

LMAO!............

stan4b: Number 11, For my calabar brothers,If she can't pronounce ur surname well.

LMAO!............

hmmmmm.... Really?

Remember a couple of
days back when we
revealed to you how
Ghanaian housemate, Selly
and cute small bodied
Nando had a one night stand? Well there is more
news to that. The Namibian housemate
Nando has confessed to
fellow housemate Bimp
that his one night stand
with Ghanaian housemate,
Selly gave him Chlamydiae STD. Although the details are
still a little rough and we
aren’t sure how true it
is, believe that we will get
you more details. Nando has always been an
outspoken housemate in
the house and if this
reports are true, then
expect him to SPEAK OUT!!! LOL!!!

www.informationng.com/2013/07/bbathechase-nando-reveals-that-one-night-stand-with-selly-has-left-him-with-chlamydiae-std.html

abeg o o o neymar and suarez,..... who sabi dive beta?

PAULINHO O O O O O!!!

nawa o o o... Which kind charm/chaplet dem dey giv our boiz.... Lolz

half time....

Goal!
chelsea 0 vs sunderland 1... Azicuputa own goal (forgive my typo...)... Lol

JOIN THE FUN AGAIN

1. Two guys are fightin, a 3rd guy comes along, sees dem and walks on - Dat's Lagos!
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2. Two guys are fightin, a crowd gathers to watch, a guy comes along and quietly opens a bottle of beer - Dat's Jos!
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3. Two guys are fightin, a crowd gathers 2 watch, a guy comes along and quietly says, 'God doesn't like all dis nonsense'...Pea­ ce settles in - Dat's Enugu!
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4. Two guys are fightin and a 3rd guy comes along, den a 4th and dey start arguin about who is right - U are in Sapele!
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5. Two guys are fightin, d 3rd guy comes frm a nearby house and says, "Don't fight in front of my place, go somewhere else and keep fightin". - Dat's Benin!
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6. Two guys are fightin, one runs away only 2 return with boko boys 2 start killin innocent people who know nothin about d fight - Dat's Yobe!
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7. Two guys are fightin, a 3rd guy comes along with a carton of beer, all sit 2gether drinkin beer and abusin each other and all go home as friends - U are in Waffi (Warri noni)!
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8. Two guys are fightin and one of dem starts callin d other one thief, armed robber, cultist and so on...A mob gathers and burn d accused alive - U are in Aluu!
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9: Two guys are fightin, both of dem take time out and call deir friends on deir mobiles...Now 50 guys are fightin - U are definitely in Ibadan!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
10. Two guys are fightin, a 3rd guy comes along and tries 2 make peace...D 1st two get 2gether and beat him up - Dat's Bauchi 4 U!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
11. Two guys are fightin, and the two of them are saying the same thing "Do u know who I am?" - U are in Abuja.

Naija no dey carry last...Add urs!........

JOIN THE FUN AGAIN

1. Two guys are fightin, a 3rd guy comes along, sees dem and walks on - Dat's Lagos!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
2. Two guys are fightin, a crowd gathers to watch, a guy comes along and quietly opens a bottle of beer - Dat's Jos!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
3. Two guys are fightin, a crowd gathers 2 watch, a guy comes along and quietly says, 'God doesn't like all dis nonsense'...Pea­ ce settles in - Dat's Enugu!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
4. Two guys are fightin and a 3rd guy comes along, den a 4th and dey start arguin about who is right - U are in Sapele!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
5. Two guys are fightin, d 3rd guy comes frm a nearby house and says, "Don't fight in front of my place, go somewhere else and keep fightin". - Dat's Benin!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
6. Two guys are fightin, one runs away only 2 return with boko boys 2 start killin innocent people who know nothin about d fight - Dat's Yobe!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
7. Two guys are fightin, a 3rd guy comes along with a carton of beer, all sit 2gether drinkin beer and abusin each other and all go home as friends - U are in Waffi (Warri noni)!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
8. Two guys are fightin and one of dem starts callin d other one thief, armed robber, cultist and so on...A mob gathers and burn d accused alive - U are in Aluu!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
9: Two guys are fightin, both of dem take time out and call deir friends on deir mobiles...Now 50 guys are fightin - U are definitely in Ibadan!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
10. Two guys are fightin, a 3rd guy comes along and tries 2 make peace...D 1st two get 2gether and beat him up - Dat's Bauchi 4 U!
---------------­ ---------------­ ----------
11. Two guys are fightin, and the two of them are saying the same thing "Do u know who I am?" - U are in Abuja.

Naija no dey carry last...Add urs!

10 Reasons You Know You Bought a Bad Computer

1. Lower corner of screen has the words "Etch-a-sketch" on it.
2. It's celebrity spokesman is that "Hey Vern!" guy.
3. In order to start it you need some jumper cables and a friend's car.
4. It's slogan is "Pentium: redefining mathematics".
5. The "quick reference" manual is 120 pages long.
6. Whenever you turn it on, all the dogs in your neighborhood start howling.
7. The screen often displays the message, "Ain't it break time yet?"
8. The manual contains only one sentence: "Good Luck!"
9. The only chip inside is a Dorito.
10. You've decided that your computer is an excellent addition to your fabulous paperweight collection.

hmmm.... Tempted 2 join d 1st,2nd,3rd....100th to comment wagon.... Some pple need to grow up

no comment yet

nawa ooooooo.......9ja and their definitions of demons..... understanding mathematics was my 1st step towards becoming a mathematician

hmmmmmmmmm, my inbox dont look like such,or are you copying from your inbox? lol

@ op, y nt ask abt d best OS 4 Programming? Hp dual core laptops r gud.

Pls ve online registration started? I wantd 2 reg 4 my sister who applied der. If possible post d site 4 registration and d requirements. Tnx

if u r staying far for umuahia, text me on 07065216334 to help you register coz i stays in the school. thanks

Post – UTME Screening Exercise for 2012/2013 Admission

Submitted by webmaster on Mon, 04/06/2012 - 9:03pm

This is to inform all UTME Candidates who applied for admission into First Degree programmes of Michael Okpara University of Agriculture, Umudike and scored 180 and above that the Post-UTME screening exercise for the 2012/2013 admission into the University will hold at the University Campus on Friday 15th and Saturday 16th June 2012.

DAY 1: 15/6/2012

1. All Programmes in the College of Agribusiness & Financial Management (CABFM).

2. All Programmes in the College of Agricultural Economics, Rural Sociology & Extension ( CAERSE).

3. Animal Science/Animal Production (CASAP).

4. All Programmes in the College of Agricultural & Science Education (CASE).

5. All Programmes in the College of Crop & Soil Sciences (CCSS).

6. All Programmes in the College of Natural Resources & Environmental Management (CNREM).

7. Department of Biochemistry (BCM).


DAY 2: 16/6/2012

1. All Programmes in the College of Engineering & Engineering Technology(CEET)

2 All Programmes in the College of Applied Food Sciences & Tourism(CAFST)

3 College of Veterinary Medicine (CVM)

4 All Programmes in the College of Natural & Applied Sciences (CNAS), EXCEPT Biochemistry.

Eligibility:
All candidates who chose Michael Okpara University of Agriculture, Umudike as their First or Second choice are eligible.

Requirements:
Beginning from Wednesday, 6th June, 2012 candidates are required to register online for the Screening Exercise by logging on to the University’s website at www.mouau.edu.ng. To register, candidates must proceed as follows:

Get to any of the under listed banks in and around Umuahia to pay the sum of Two thousand naira only, being processing fee and obtain a scratch card.

The Banks are:
* EcoBank International Plc, Umuahia & Umudike.
* Access Bank Plc, Umuahia & Umudike.
* Zenith Bank, Umuahia & Umudike.
* First Bank Plc, Umuahia.

Log on to the University website at www.mouau.edu.ng and follow the link for 2012 Post-UTME registration.

Proceed to complete the form, including uploading your passport photograph and print out the completed form.

Registration closes on Wednesday, 13th June, 2012.

Candidates should come to the venue of the exercise at 7.30 a.m. with the following:

Printout of the completed online registration form.
A copy of the passport size photograph uploaded with candidate’s full name and JAMB Registration number written at the back.
Printout of the JAMB Result.
Writing Materials (e.g. Pen, HB Pencil, Eraser, Ruler).

Information on venues for each programme or the respective Colleges would be available on the University website and would also be widely circulated on campus.

Candidates should note that the use of handsets, scientific calculators and other electronic devices will not be allowed during the screening exercise. Candidates should also note that incorrect on-line registration will not be captured in our data- base.
Results of the screening exercise could be accessed at the University Website from Monday 18th June, 2012.

Dr. A. C. Nwokocha
Registrar.

WORD 4 2DAY

WORD 4 2DAY

TOPIC: Launch Out
MEMORY VERSE:
'Launch out into the deep.' Luke 5:4

Dr. Robert Schuller's hobbies include raising koi fish. Asked why some grow big while others stay small, he replied, 'If a koi fish lives in a small tank it will never grow longer than two or three inches. In a larger pond they can grow up to ten inches long-in ponds the size of mine they'll get to be eighteen inches long-but if they live in a huge lake where they can swim and stretch, they can grow up to three feet long. The size of the pond determines the size of the fish.
Similarly, little ideas in little-thinking minds produce little achievements. But little ideas embraced by big-thinking minds produce enormous achievements.' Jesus said, 'According to your faith be it unto you' (Mt 9:29). The size of your faith and your vision determines the outcome of your idea.
Edison had to install electric lights for free in an office building before anyone even came to look at them. The first sewing machine invented was destroyed by a mob in France. Morse waited for ten years before the world showed any interest in his telegraph. And when the idea of travelling by railroad was introduced, people scoffed because it was widely believed that travelling at thirty miles per hour stopped blood circulation in the human body. Ronald E. Osborn said, 'Undertake something difficult; it will do you good. Unless you try something beyond what you have already mastered, you'll never grow.' You attain in direct proportion to what you attempt, which is why Jesus said to His disciples: 'Launch out into the deep.'
Bible in a Year: Judges 16:1 - 19:15; Mark 14:66-72; Ps 48; Pr 13:2-3

In MOUAU, We ve gt Eco Bank and Access Bank. If u thinking of withdrawng from dem is beta to go as early as possible or b ready to join que

Over 8, 000 ghost workers have been discovered in the Kano State Government payroll by the
committee set to audit workers in the civil service. Umar Faruk, the state’s Commissioner for Information, Internal Affairs, Youths, Sports and Culture, disclosed this while briefing journalists in Kano on Thursday. He said the figure is contained in an interim report of the committee on the on-going
capture of biometric data of workers in the state and local government service. Faruk also gave an indication that this figure may be higher.
“The report highlighted the progress made so far in which over 8,000 ghost workers were identified in the interim report,” he said.
The state government, according to him, has embarked on a massive overhaul of services and
infrastructure, adding that N3.1 billion has been approved for the execution of 11 projects. “These include N1.7 billion
approved for the State Universal Basic Education Board to utilise the 2011 matching grant to
construct classrooms and
provide teachers and students’ furniture,” he said.
He said N740 million would be used as share capital for the 37 proposed micro finance banks across the state, adding that
N197.8 million was also approved for the supply of 2, 300 tonnes of aluminium sulphate for the
treatment of water at various water plants in the state. Other approved projects include:
N66.1 million to facilitate the third batch of the
government’s Animal Traction Programme; N24.4 million for the construction of overflow parking lots in front of the state government house; and N15.9 million for the construction of
drainage and other civil works around the same premises.

Source; Daily Time

A gang of 10 gunmen
today, invaded the cattle
market in Potiskum, Yobe State,
killing two traders and injuring
an unspecified number of people. Riding on motorcycles, the
gunmen attacked the market in
the same way as a group of
hoodlums invaded the same place
early this month, killing about 50
traders. Residents confirmed the incident
on the telephone.
Attempts to obtain a
confirmation from the state
police command failed.
Source; Punch

A Pakistani court has sentenced
a Pakistani doctor who helped
the United States track down
Osama bin Laden to 33 years in
prison.
Shakil Afridi ran a vacation
programme for the Central
Intelligence Agency to collect and
verify bin Laden’s presence at
the compound in Abbottabad
where United States commandos killed the al Qaeda chief on May
2 last year, the Associated Press
reports.

Wearing ties makes u look coporate and professional. Occasions demand wen to wear it... As 4 me i look naked without my ties on wen it comes to attending special occasion.

@ 1025, lol... Market fyn. But which kyn market?

Lol cant believe he is saying dis afta his ordeal... Smh