₦airaland Forum

Neyoor:
Same way some men would neglect their women in bed as punishment for erring. Some would even go as far as neglecting their wive's food even when they are responsible for the make-up fee.


It is called Manipulation, Both Gender are guilty of it.

Perfect point.

So, are we to agree that women v'got more edge over men in "Sex" ?

Grayjoy:
by having the edge over men in SEX what do u mean? Am nt cleared on dat line.

I mean women using sex as a bargaining tool to extort money from men.

greiboy:
Absolutely, it is tag they should live with.

Although, some ladies offer way more than their body.

Lol, thanks man.

You smart but stubborn to concur to a different motion

RuthDaniels:
You are welcome!
Have a nice night

You too dear, stay cool.

makydebbie:
Yes, lol. But you're talking about serious relationships which has got me confused. You mean relationships leading to marriage?

What do sugar mummies boyfriends offer their sugar mummies aside sex? I think that answers your question then.

Yea, leading to marriage

Sugar mummy shii is an agreed "Offer and demand" deal of a relationship, unlike relationship between serious partners heading to somewhere.

I want to know if women can aswell use the cliche "Some men offer nothing but sex in a relationship"

greiboy:
Men cannot offer what is not demanded, only a few men is showered the sex in the first place . Ladies only present sex to a few as gifts.

Those showered can then decide to start offering sex as something special in return if they want to. I.e. the playboys and Bleep boys

Word!

AntiBrutus:
Yes, a man can offer 'just sex'. There are so many women using men as sex objects. The major differences are, the male ego won't allow him agree he is the one being used.

Then, a woman will most likely not come out to brag of how she is using a guy for sex. It's not the average female thing to talk about such...plus in our society, she'll still end up getting shamed.

Here, a woman is the only one that depreciates via sex.
Never a man .

Lol, I never expected less

Your comment said that it happens, but a mind game, it's hardly revealed by women and accepted in the society.

But, you tryna say that a gender offers sex?

Not a "Both thing"

Safiaaa:
That’s because the hunt and crave for sex is a temporary want. It’s like when you’re craving a bottle of Fanta, you’ll do anything to drink it. Once you drink it, the crave automatically disappear and you see it as less valuable. When the men have achieved their goal which is sex they move on to the next. Men are not emotional so they have sex without attaching emotions. Sex can get you materialistic things from a man (when he’s at the craving stage) , but it can’t make a man love you or stay with you. That’s surpassing the temporary stage. Hope that makes sense.

Perfect, I now get.

You made sense

Grayjoy:
That is where we go back to what d society installed in our mentality. Every lady deserves a man dat preserves his body but what d society made us believe is dat, that preserved male is nt important like d preserved female. Let's take 4 example, a guy keeps sleeping with a lady and a certain neighbourhood lets say work place or school in dis context is aware of it, d lady is assumed to be a slut and could even be publicly addressed with dat tag by both male and female but what do we call d guy? We applaud him. It's sumtin dat has been passed down to us but in fairness, with normal reasoning and equity in consideration, what is good 4 d goose is good 4 d gander.

You are right brO, very very right.

Preserved women are more valued than preserved men, infact preserved men are in some cases mocked as novice.

You typed of gender equity in considering sexual issues, do you really think "Gender equity" should be considered in sexual issues?

If YES, why then do ladies have edge over men in SEX when it should be equalized?

greiboy:
Sexual manipulation works both ways my brother.

Women are less likely to be manipulated though because it takes something special to manipulate them.

In addition, any man handsome or good enough to manipulate women emotionally is already preoccupied with many ladies, so it it is highly unlikely.

Men on the other hand, take less effort to be manipulate because most men were denied the privileges in the first place.

Take for example, in the Nazi concentration camp in Second world war in Germany. when many Jews were freed by the allied forces and given bread. They valued it so much to the extent that some were hiding it and ready to die, thinking the allied forces were German forces.


Same principles can be applied to sex


It goes back to hoarding of sex bro, it isn't a cycle it a deliberate plot by most ladies.

Perfect!, brO.

Ofwhich they should be blamed for the countering cliche that says "Most women offer nothing than sex"

Neyoor:
Either offer sex or make sex, this is only peculiar to sex outside marriage. When you are married, you make love and don't offer sex. Making love is mutualistic hence the reason for the uniqueness of its contextual and literal meaning. in my mother's tongue, they called it "Ibalopo" which is the art of making love.

However, sex outside wedlock could be regarded as anything, according to why and what people indulging in it are getting from it. Ladies offer sex same as men, for the financial reason, pleasure and other personal beliefs.

But some women hoards sex in a marriage so as to get and meet their demands

RuthDaniels:
Now you are deviating! The emboldened is another topic entirely, I tried to explain the Genesis of the offering cliche. Does that mean things are still the same they were back then?

Women have no right over sexual satisfactory complaint? Well maybe in the 18's... Yes! but in this very century... Hell no. Hold that believe, and watch how quick you and your dick will be replaced!

I had to laugh at your "Dick replacement" hint

Thanks a bunch for your contribution.

makydebbie:
I think that happens with friends with benefits, where both parties want sexual satisfaction only.

How about in a serious relationship where some women are said to be offering only sex, can men aswell be said to offer only sex?

If YES, In what possible condition and assumption can such be stated?

That's one of my major answer for creating this thread.

Safiaaa:
very impossible African men love sex diee, esp naija ones. Gosh it’s actually shameful Lool.

Do you know statistically men who prioritise sex too high tend to be less successful in life? Do your research.

Lol.

I will find you annoying if I start misinterpreting this comment

Now tell, who are we to blame nature on that?

Gungnir:
@donstan18
It's dump not dumb.

Thanks man

Safiaaa:
Explain the bolded again. That question doesn’t make sense to me.

Now if women couldn’t use sex as a manipulative tool then their options would be limited. But let’s not forget that men are visual beings. Sometimes you don’t have to have sex with them to get what you. If you look very attractive, nice body, you can get what you want. I’ve personally received money randomly, got things for free and had free rides from just being ‘attractive’ to a man. In this life we all take advantage of what we can, that’s just life.

Men are on the receiving end most times with sex,because they hunt, initiate and crave it more than women. That’s just the truth.

@My bolded.

I meant, since weak point is seen as the spot by which you can be manipulated or convinced, if we are to agree with you that sex is the weak point of most men.

Why then do men dump ladies?, despite the fact that their assumed weak point is "Sex", how about ladies capitalizing and attempting their weak point which is "Sex" to avoid being dumped.

---

Your last line is true, men hunt and crave for it, hence giving women higher edge over them in sex.

greiboy:
No

it cannot be reversed in the Nigerian society

It has been reversed to an extent in most advanced societies though, as we have now seen ladies openly ask men out and seen ladies propose to men, although there is still remnant of that mentality.

In Nigeria, it is highly unlikely.

Makes one wonder why Africa women are advocating for equal rights

Not my headache tho

@Bolded, I'm preparing a thread for that soon


I think it can only be reversed with a high contribution of men.

The question should be.

How many men tends to resist sexual manipulation by ladies, hence prompting women to ask for it.

How possible is that in Africa ?

makydebbie:
But why are most of you all not really answering the question?

"Can we say men offer nothing except sex? " is the question and everyone is emotional.

Lol... One of the questions I asked which is yet to be answered.

So I ask ma'am, can we say such?

RuthDaniels:
The society made women on the offering side when it comes satisfying sexual urges. Women are expected to give only when it is asked but must not ask, they are not allowed to express their sexual feelings. This is the Genesis of the offering mentality.
Lol.. @ Countering cliche, although it sounds perfect.

Some men offer sex. The world has revolved, women are getting more expressive, there are fvckboys and jigolos out there who satisfy women's need in exchange for money or other materials. They are in minority though.

I would rather say, men demand sex more not offer.

Perfect!

You made a point concerning how less women tend to demand or ask for sex due to African societal view or tag, it's either they are tagged cheap or less dignitary conscious. You are right.

Concerning the fvckboi offering sex, it's minor, it can supersede the rate in which women hoard and offer sex when they want.

If we are to agree that men demand, not offer.

Are aswell suppose to agree to the motion that Women have no right over sexual satisfactory complaint , since they offer what was demanded of them

Grayjoy:
We do say men get d sex due to the following reasons 4rm my point of observation.
1. Men are more outspoken about their sexually which makes the female folks to believe dat d existence of men so much depend on sex, so we all feel it's a favour 4rm d lady.
2. Some men feel like it's an achievement wen u sex d beautiful dat many guys are drooling over, although d lady herself enjoys the sex, but mentally we feel it's an achievement on d part of dis guy.
3. How will u rate a lady who speaks much about d sex and how much she enjoys it? i.e to say d society makes us to mentally picture it as a gift 4rm a lady if she agrees to sex u, although many ladies view it dat way. But in reality, sex should be enjoyed by both partners. That is wen ur involvement with her is nt d sex aspect and hers with u is nt whatever she will gain after d sex.
And to crown it all, a woman's body is delicate and
sacred and should be preserved 4 sum1 she loves and spend her life with, and whatever u get dat is nt meant 4 u automatically becomes a gift.
HOPE MY POINTS ARE ON POINT THOUGH.

You have a clear and good point brO!

I perfectly understood you.


But, you said a woman's body is delicate, scared and should be preserved for someone she loves, don't you think women aswell deserves a man who preserves his body

Safiaaa:
Its very rare to find men who can’t be manipulated with sex. That’s every mans weak point, and women know this and that’s why they use it to their advantage. If more men could halve self control, then women will not be able to use their pussy to get what they want from you. But unfortunately, that will never happen. Women will continue to take adantage of your weakness. And men will continue to shout that’s all they offer when indirectly that’s all you value. It’s a cycle

Lol, we have such men

Permit me to say that we have many of them that can hardly be manipulated sexually .

I personally do not think "Sex" can be a man's weak or spot point, if it was, why then do men dump ladies for another lady when that same lady can give them sex which you claimed to be the weak point of man

Again I ask ma'am, if more men start having this very control you scribbled of, what would be the fate of women who gets what they want with pussy how do you think they intend getting what they want.


But wait, do you mean men don't offer sex?

greiboy:
Yes
sex shouldn't be a demand and supply thing

It should be a commodity as free as the oxygen we breathe in, but if something bad happened and the air becomes polluted with excess carbon dioxide, it becomes toxic. So we have to start valuing oxygen.

Same thing applies to sex, Many ladies have decided to hoard it and add value to it. They have decided to make it an offer, something special

Yes, they are to blame because they created scarcity to some, while over showering some with it. just like money. Especially in the Nigerian society

Yes, men demand sex in Africa, because it is an offer that we work for


We pay bride price

We have to provide for the home

in the past, in some cultures we have to beat ourselves up just to marry a wife

Heloooooo bro, it is quite obvious

@Bolded, that was too raw

Having generally said and known that women do the offering" while me do the "Demanding", do you think such sexual mentality can be equally reversed and mutually neutralized amongst partner?

greiboy:
Anything that does not have value, not every price is money

Have you ever heard of the saying" pay the ultimate price"

What of things that doesn't have value to the rich, but has values to the poor?

Jman06:
A good woman does not only offer sex but also offers companionship, great food, some even offer money etc. In marriage they also bear children and nurse them until they grow.
Many Nigerian ladies can't even offer great sex. They would lay like log of wood as the man sweats it out. They hardly even initiate sex or go on the offensive during sex and that makes them boring in bed. But we'll continue to wife the few good ones among them who can offer other things than their boring sex.

Lol, why did you say "Women offer" sex?

Do men offer as well?

Safiaaa:
It baffles me when men talk about women only offering sex. What else is of value to you men, apart from sex? When you idolised sex so much and put it on a pedestal, wouldn’t it be smart to take advantage of that?

Why do you think women sell their virginity’s for millions of dollars?
Why is the porn industry worth billions?
Why does ‘sex sell’?
Why do men spend their life savings/end up bankrupt for 5 mins of pleasure?
Worshipping and following women just for sex

Before anybody says anything about women offering only their vaginas, prioritise your life. If you put sex before everything, expect women to take advantage of it. Sex is a mutual agreement, beneficial to both. The desperation and crave that men have for sex, is the reason why men are at the receiving end whilst the women are givers.

Lol, you made a smart comment and as well blunt and annoying to men .. That's by the way,

Back to the point.

In summary of what you commented, you meant that Men are the reason why women financially bargain and take advantage of sex

How about men that can't be manipulated with sex, how do you think these set of ladies that bargains for sex will fit in to the society with their man?

Grayjoy:
IMO, no gender "offers" sex except d 2nd party is just there to "accept" the sex.
A woman's worth is far more than sex, sex is one of the secondary benefits u get 4rm a woman even when it's ur primary aim.

Lol, cool.

But, must men be the ones getting sex?

Why do we say "Men get sex"?

greiboy:
ok I get your question now, I didn't pay much attention before


You have asked the question from the other way round.

In fact, many ladies often prioritize sex as an advantage in the African society more than men do

For example,

Beninoise music icon and human right activist Angelina kijo once said on an interview with CNN that women in Liberia once threatened to deny their husbands sex to blackmail them to vote the former president of Liberia Ellen Johnson Sirleaf to power because she is a woman as against Weah a man back In the early 2000s


This is a mentality shared by most women in Africa, as many of them often claim that a poor guy doesn't deserve sex or relationship.

So in essence, women are the one dignifying the role of sex in relationships. They see it as a bargaining chip. I.e. what they have to offer


Most men use the word "offer sex" just to qualify that attribute in women

Lol, I'm glad you now understood me


Yes, you are right concerning how women prioritize sex as an advantage over men, hence prompting men to say that's what they offer, because I can't remember seeing a woman say "Men offer sex" , when we both know that sex should be a "Two gender thing".

But brO, judging from what you scribbled, are we to agree to the cliche that "Women offer sex" when we know sex shouldn't be a supply and demand thing?

If YES, are they to be blamed for such cliche?

If YES, can we aswell say that "men demand for sex" ?

RuthDaniels:
Lol!
The cliche "women have nothing to offer than sex" is mostly used by guys! There is a difference between a man and a guy. A man in this context is one who is matured, sane and also understands the diversity of human. He understands his counterpart, the woman. He knows how to make best of his woman. So I will be basing any further argument on this description.

Of course it takes two to mingle, two to have sex. saying one gender has nothing to offer than sex simply means the other gender has nothing to demand than sex. What will happen if Ladies start with the cliche "men wants nothing more than sex". Sounds crazy though!

If I see a man who wants nothing from me aside sex, who only seek my attention only when he is Hot I wouldn't think twice to cut all ties with him.

Prostitutes offers sex, Ignorant ladies who think all they can ever be to men is sex object offers sex. But I must put this.. They offer sex in return for something

All said, I believe no one should offer or demand sex. Sex should come and be enjoyed naturally by both genders without actual demand or supply.

Lol, I couldn't help but to concur to your smartness, your second paragraph clearly hinted to my point.

I may have used the cliche, but I don't think it's logically proper if we men are to give a neutral thought in it, sex should be a "Both thing", but the motion of women offering sex left me with no other choice than to think loud about it... Could this be a countering cliche?

How about men?, can you in anyway say they offer sex?, how proper is that statement.

Once you stop Nairaland, she'll stop.

*Modified*

mofeoluwadassah:
Hmmm.....

How do you do?
What do you have to say?

kimbraa shouldn't be viewing without commenting. Opinionate