₦airaland Forum

JhayJoe:
Op

"Has successfully used up his lifetime erection bundle on masturbation and prostitutes. To renew your bundle,please go see a doctor.
Thank you for sharing your problem with A.C.N (Association of Concerned Nairalanders)

I wonder which network OP dey use, e come be likesay the data quick finish

Raydos:
I thought they said by 2020 we gonna have flying cars, Colonisation of Mars, Building house on Jupiter, and so much more!!


But Na so so death we dey hear for this 2020 ooo, Abi nah the wrong 2020 we dey ni?

My brother this 2020 na counterfeit.

Ivimilly:
No time let's call on INDABOSKI for national prayer and deliverance

You forgot to add the suffix bahose to his name.

Anigreat:








The use of face masks will reveal to you the degree/concentration and intensity of your mouth odour. What you have been serving others you'll be served a hundred fold.

Tinubu is afraid of using it, he knows he might not survive the horrible smell oozing out from there.

this table you are shaking, some people fit fall ontop your head o!

Lekan239:
I already have my OND in mechanical engineering, and I'm currently in HND1 but there's no clue on how I could get enough money to pay the remaining bills before exam. Sometimes I still thank God for bringing this corona virus at the right time, if not for the virus exam would have began and I would officially have been a dropout again. Either way I'm always looking forward to what life throws at me. And I'm already planning of the way forward if I eventually dropout. But all I know is that either now or later I will surely complete my education

Been following your write up bro, I feel so sorry for you and I honestly wish I could do something for you at this point but this corona shit is affecting everyone.. Take heart bro, all will be well with you in future, just don't give up. And I wish your mum speedy recovery and long life to reap the fruits of her labour on all her children.
Remain blessed.

Kate06:
Chinese are the world's greatest enemies and bill gate an agent of Antichrist.

Meanwhile,here is what we do to earn online...

Time to trade Bitcoin & get some good profits.

I need just 10 people to join me with 100 euro each to get massive monthly profits from trading. Each investor will get as low as 100 euro profit at the end of each month guaranteed.

I made 74 euro profits last week & I have been making it weekly with just 500 euro capital.Quote post to start investing now.

Our members have started getting good profits already..

Sup bro? can we talk privately?

I wish I got tears to shed for him

NaijaRoyalty:
Then paying tax too is not compulsory , the people paying it are also doing it out of goodwill.

You should not have replied that fool.

RedBlackPepper:
Hmm! I learnt hunger virus is more brutal than corona virus. But wouldn't it be wise for us to remain indoor and endure the hunger rather than dying of corona virus?

It's not wise bro, if the govt cannot do the right thing then the masses have no choice but to learn how to live with the virus while they hustle for food to look after their families. By the way the virus is more lethal to the white folks and the Nigerians who have died were those that lived in the UK/US.

ornicus:
No one will take it seriously if people are not dying.

Nwanne it's not about death, if the govt can provide the basic amenities for people they will stay at home. A few of us may be privileged and can survive for as long as possible staying at home but what about the poor? You don't expect a single mother with children to watch her kids cry of hunger everyday when there's no hope in sight from the silly govt that ordered her to stay at home.. I'm a single dad and I know how it feels seeing my daughter cry for food, not to talk of a woman who naturally has a high protective instincts over her offsprings.

fulaniHERDSman:
Mumu talk. If na me, the slap U go receive, teeth no go remain U for mouth again. Na your priick
No respect again for this world.

Frankicent:
Did you check the category she was watching? Hardcore, lesbian, g*ng b*ng.. Etc it will help you understand her better.

If na me I go check oo. After that you know the rest.

lol your head dey there

visijo:
See talk

Those guys without beards, how do you feel when washing your face?� feels like you're washing mango right?�

stupidity:
Today I witnessed the most bizarre of stupidity in the history of Nigeria.


You tell people to stay indoors to help fight disease spread, you tell this same people to come out and line up in queue to receive one “derica” cup of rice each. What if that person one way contacts the disease he or she is avoiding because of our leader’s stupidity and take it home to share to families?


I was in shock mhen........ I shar know this Coro nor fit kill me. I can’t die now.

If una like make una use stupidity spread am well.

You just said what I had in mind

JubrinElSudan:
We must hear I ASSUA you today

lol.. "assuarance"

Openbusiness:
Chaiiii, so this Lagos total lockdown from tonight is real ? I swear I thought Buhari was just playing. Pease someone should just do 'mistake' an transfer money to my account, may hunger no kill me the next 14 days abeg. If I don't login on Nairaland, after 3 days from today, just know that na Buhari and Sanwo Olu kill me. Buhari, I know you don't like me and I don't like you and we don't like eachother, and eachother don't like ourselves and ourselves don't like the 2 of us but please credit my account before hunger kill me Stanbic IBTC bank, 001 851 2460! Don't turn my children to orphan . Don't turn my girlfriend to widower, she's too young, and na Lagos girl she be, she will date another guy after 6 hours

Shellsploit:
Useless country!
Na to go mama uchendu shop go stock fufu sure pass.




"Having sex with a maid is not easy to live with. Whenever you hear her say "auntie I want to tell you something".... you can even develop symptoms of COVID 19."

Burst my head!

Buliwyf:
Which tribulation? Lol. You clowns are hilarious. This virus is going to pass as usual and you jesters will crawl back into your circus and hide to wait for another disaster or crisis so u can slither out and keep parroting drivel.

You entertain me.

Please don't mind those deluded fools who don't fail to seize every opportunity to glorify their biblical god, it amazes me as much as you how they think that coronavirus is wrath from their god to punish mankind.

SultanOfPuna:
NO PASTOR ON THE LIST
if after you survive corona
And you go back to give Pastor Your Tithe
That means your Stupidity is Stronger Than Nuclear Bomb..
Even Jesus will be Shocked At Your Stupidity

trutht828:
You should ask Buhari how he spent all the money voted for healthcare. Ask yourself how come there are only 2 functional ventilators in Abuja despite billions budgeted for the same purpose by the man who is deceiving himself that he is fighting corruption.

His only solution to his personal health was to travel abroad for medical care and refuse to improve Nigeria's healthcare services. If he had done the right thing, there won't be problem today. So, may Buhari and Abba kyari eat the fruits of their wickedness to the full.

Amen

backnbeta:
See our so-called leaders sitting packed like canned fish, without any form of protection against corona virus! Who does that? Is it illiteracy or stupidity?

Because they think corona virus is meant for the poor masses.

GuyWise101:
It is hitting the ruling class back2back


Corona na u biko

Lmao!! No be small "na u biko".

buygala:
Ok

That still doesn't mean he will make a good Governor...if Rochas with all his charitable works and Oshiomohle with all his holy-pass attitude as NLC President can end up being among the worst Public officers Nigeria has produced, then Mr Maduka should know that all this image laundry won't do him much good...

I wish him well tho...at least it isn't my state that he is intending to Govern....

So if this is your yardstick for measurement, how then do we know who the right person is for governance? How then do we give the young ones a chance to rule?

GOFRONT:
Wow, Table has turned....

She must have taken too much of Agbojedi before the sexcapade..

lol!

abluck:
As a woman actress, model to millions

the thing shock you abi?

ouzo1:
Why do people record or take nudes?

As for me o if I want to watch blue film na straight to xvideos o,i can not comman ruin somebody's child life cuz of my foolishness.

guy watching porn on xvideos is not same thing as when a woman you are crushing on or planning to sleep with sends you her nude, damn it's mind blowing!!

Pavore9:
God "created you" that way and still commands you not to commit fornication nor adultery? He created you in His own image, to be the physical and spiritual head of your home and not to sleep around like a dog.

Oga or madam, he said the gospel truth. Men are polygamous by nature, when a man sees a woman the first thing that come to his mind is sexx. A man loves with his d*ck first before his heart.

Excallibur:
I use to think that these celebrity news were a waste of time, but with recent ocurances in this country, they are now like a breath of fresh air

lol i swear, thought I was the only one who knew.

solmusdesigns:



many Northern youths are innovative, but their greedy elders wont let them shine.. i remember sometimes few years ago when Habokkiis designed a PVC pipe LED AA battery using lamp and where hawking it about, i was currious and i bought one, and it was not only very effective it used lesser energy

Young Habokii youth are inventing sucide bomb vest and new drugs to get high by sniffing soak away , gum , and reptile feaces... if Government sponsor them t get proper training, i see them producing Nuclear bombs and Hybrid of cheaper crack cocaine

.

Lol

Did you say this guy is 31years and he has five children?

hopefulLandlord:
Christians should be very watchful of their utterances against this pastor as what he wanted to do might've been commanded by Yahweh as he works in mysterious ways and his wisdom, as our Holy Bible said, looks like foolishness unto man.

Yahweh once told the Israelites to kill all midianites but keep young virgin girls as war booty. This sounds wrong to us but whatever Yahweh commands is wise even if it looks wrong in our limited knowledge he has his reasons

Yahweh figuratively destroyed Saul for not totally destroying the Amalekites

Yahweh once told Ezekiel to eat bread baked with human shiit

Same way Yahweh sent lying spirits to Ahab's prophets. This also sounds wrong to us but he has his reasons we aren't privy to and he answers to no one

Yahweh also hardened Pharaoh's heart while using that as opportunity to send more plagues and kill innocent people until all firstborn sons of the Egyptians are dead. This also sounds cruel but that's Yahweh showing us his loving power and nobody should question him

Yahweh struck Onan dead for refusing to cum into his brother's wife's vagyna


Yahweh's ways are not our ways. its possible Yahweh instructed this pastor to sleep with his church elder's wife. Yahweh might have his reasons so we should not use our limited knowledge to judge what a man talking to a being of unlimited knowledge does. Beware not to bring a curse upon your lives and future generations by attacking a true man of Yahweh

Lol..

eaddyboy:
Awesome

While some are wailing on top 7am - 6pm jobs here in Nigeria

Them go still come pay u 30k at the end of the month.