₦airaland Forum

mogentle,

Too bad that my husband was not one of the 63 deported Nigerians. I've done everything for him to save his ass and he started making plans to leave me on the same week that his papers were approved. He does not seem to care that the first card is temporary and when it is time for us to sign the joint papers for the permanent card those Calabar harlots that he consorts with can't help him and I'll be long gone. Idimilli can have him back

Could this mean that he has another wife waiting in the background. I married him because I loved him. Would it be improper for me to introduce myself to his family when I visit Nigeria with my girlfriend. I'm not fat and ugly and love Nigerian people. Why does he seem to be ashamed of me. I think that If they knew me they would not object to our marriage. In Anambra Idomilli area is it shameful to be married to an African American woman. Let me hear from Nigerian people about this issue.

None if the Igbo names listed . The most beautiful name I love is Chinyere

Hi Nilanders,

What do you think about the so called Christian who attends mass on Sunday after having been to the Traditional Chapel where they wear white and do JuJu the same evening. What's with these fake christians who profess Jesus but seek out Dibia and whitchcraft people.
This is my delima And I never knew that my husband ws like this until after marriage. I am so disgusted about this turn of events. I don't want a divorce but I'm miserable in this marriage.

Egnimatick

What a woman or man does before marriage is none of either of your business. The only thing you need to know is what happens after your wedding date. What were you doing prying about her past, even you have a past which is only your business

In regard to all the cheating husbands,

We as wives can't change a cheater but If you are lucy enough to find out his girlfriends name like I did, What you do is expose her name to the public and let the world know where she comes from.Let her village know that they have produced a husband stealing harlot, then what will her parents and relatives think of her then. Sometimes you just have to shame them both. De demons work best under the cover of darkness and like it if no one knows whst they are doing. EXPOSE THEM

What should a good wife do with her earnings.

She should always be willing to spend it in her household. When the husband wants her to ask permission to spend any of it and wants her to bring her check home and hand it to him, now thats another story. The wife did't need help punching that time clock everyday so she needs no help in spending it without preapproval from her husband. Personally I'll pay bills but I don't give him my cash, especially when he's running about with his harlots and concubines. I won't pay his pu**y bill out of my pocket. Lets hear from you other sisters about this.

Hi Sagitarius,

I would love to show afection to my Anambra naji man who I loved dearly at the start. I have now found out that his JuJu woman frm Calabar has turned his head and rattled his brain. I know that as soon as I extracate myself from this mess that I'll find a nice naji man to love who is not just after papers and knows how to treat a woman. So I won't give up on naji men I was just unlucky the first time.

Cimonjorr,
I think I found the solution for my cheating spouse, don't get mad get even. Since the harlot that he consorts with has no papers I think
that I'll just call the hotline at immigration so they can have the bangles ready when she goes for her green card interview. I think she needs a free one way ticket back to the bush she came from. By the way she is not innocent, she knows that he is married and persists in harassing
my household with her calls. If he doen't like it, he can go with her and I told him so. She could not be so bold without his cooperation.
Now that I know her home address they may decide to pick her up before her interview. Will she think going back home in disgrace be worth what she has done. I'd like to know what others think about this problem I have. What would do?

Frank 3.16

You seem like such a wonderful guy., but don"t do it, ever. If I had only known before I married this juju loving man I;m married to. This nonsense is what has broken us up. I've prayed and prayed, cried and shouted to no avail. He calles himself a good Catholic and yet persists
in keeping company with this juju woman from Calabar. How can you be a christian and a Dibia witch doctor at the same time. I don't believe in juju so it can"t hurt me. A thousand curses to the juju harlot who has destroyed his mind and our marriage. Get on your broom anf fly back to Calabar

Some say there is some good juju, please tell me what kind is good I love my Anambra man and don't want to divorce him.

Confused,

Just follow your heart. If it feels good, do it. Don't try to keep them both tho, someone is bound to have hust feelings.

Good luck and good loving,
Euchena

Lucio,


PLEASE , DON'T DO IT. tELL HIM YOU WANT TO MARRY HIM BUT YOU COULD NEVER SPONSOR HIM tHESE 419 MARRIAGE CROOKS ONLY WANT SEX AND MONEY. tHEY USUALLY HAVE A BUSH WIFE AND OTHER CONCUBINES WAITING IN THE WINGS, SO AS SOON AS HE GETS THOSE PAPERS HE'S GONE OR YOU HAVE TO SHARE HIM WITH THE OTHER WOMEN ALL DURING YOUR MARRIAGE.

Hi NJean

It is so nice that you love a Nigerian man. I remember when I had stars in my eyes when I was in love with my Anambra man. We eventually married and later I found out that he only wanted papers. Did'nt even have the decency to pretend. Now I've been abandoned and he cavorts around with his Calabar harlot and stays gone all of the time. I no longer have a marriage. I hope your love lasts but don't under any circumstances sign any papers or sponsor him. I did everything for this Idomilli man and he has brought nothing but misery to my life. I was hoping that we'd grow old togather and bounce his grandchildren on our laps. This masquerade of a man does not want his children or family to even know that we are married. I had heard that an Igbo man was the best kind of man to marry but I wonder what on earth did I do to deserve this poor ass excuse of a man that I got stuck with. I hear that this other woman is married to an American man trying to get her papers. Now that I know who she is and where she lives I think that I need to turn her in to immigration so she can get her free one way ride back to Nigeria. I can't change his behavior but I can change her address. If he doesn't like it he can go back with her. Now when he f#@@s up she can pay! He can't have two wives in America and I won't share.

Hi Puskin,

I don"t have one but if I could be so lucky to find one. Here we call it friends with benefits. I have an incapacited husband
and ain't had none in so long. Don't know how much longer I can put up with this drought. Body no made of wood!

ifalwars,

If what you suggested was true, maybe I could live and let live and just pray the demons out of my house each day and ignore this juju stuff. Unfortunately we have seperated but still live in the same house. I would love to resume my marriage but this situation is hopeless. I would never refuse him and I want a christian man in my life. Before we married he promised to go to the Methodist church with me sometimes and I promised to visit the Catholic church but I never promised to convert. Now he is not even true to his own religion because know that you cannot serve two masters. It is impossible to be a good catholic, and I'm his third wife by the way and be a juju man at the same time. He is lying to himself and to God and he was certainly lying when he said "I do". I'm left alone and lonely while he cavorts around with that harlot from Calabar.

Of course I've discussed this whole mess and have cried a river of tears. But no longer. He says that I can't take his culture away from him but he never disclosed this aspect of his life until after we were married. I only found out about this madness after the fact or I would never have married him.

I feel sad for the predicament that you find yourself in . I'm in somewhat similiar situation. My Anambra husband after 18months of marriage now wants nothing to do with me and lives elsewhere on weekends. I have found out that the woman he has been seeing has no papers and is married to an american man trying to get papers. Since I now know her name and address and family I am seriously considering turining her in to Immigration so when she goes in for her papers, they will have the bangles waiting for her. I told him that I can't make him love me and I can't stop his actions but I sure can change her address. If he does not like it he can go back to Nigeria with her. For all of his dishonesty and lies I'll just make her pay. By the way she knows he is married and had disturbed our marriage the whole 18 months we have been togather.
I feel so cheated and disrespected by this Wyowyo man. I hear she is a JUJU woman from Calabar and he is from Anambra. My Enugu friends say this is a hopeless case and marriage counseling has not helped. He is a well educated professional man living a double life and now claims that he is a seer which I think is a JUJU or Dibia man. What are these prayers to Elmez, is this a wichcraft diety. We used to be friends and worked togather before we bacame lovers and married. I feel that he may have another wife or may be still married to his children's mother. He won't let me meet any of his family and they probably don't know of my existance. I thought we'd grow old togather and rock his grandchildren one day I am so hurt and betrayed, disappointed. I had always heard that African men were so family oriented and good husbands. He claims to be a good catholic but lives a double life with this JUJU business. I married for love but got hate in return.

On the subject of marriage to an Anambra man, I am throughly puzzled and confused.     As an African American woman I married an Anambra man  and my life has been hell every since. What is this thing about the blatant disrespect of the marriage and all of this JUJU business. After marriage he now claims that he is a Seer and hangs around with his JUJU Calabar friends and claims to be a good Catholic while practicing JUJU at the same time. What are these prayers to Elmez. Is this a diety.  My Enugu friends said not to marry him, but love won over. He has turned out to be a WyoWyo man of the worse sort. I'm considering after 18 months of marriage to get out of this farse of a marriage. Oh by the way his last name is Ezeoranu and I truly feel betrayed and misled yet i hate the thought of divorce. Marriage counseling has not helped.

I loved and married an Anambra man and have had a very difficult time trying to figure out if he married me but is just not interested in being romantic. I've felt lonely lost and thrown away. If I had only known that Nigerian men are culturally just unable to show their feelings very well.
Now that I've read this article maybe I can better cope with this situation. I hope over time I can warm him up to being more attentive to me. If not I'll just have to resort to Igba N'Rira. I've been married only 16 months and he certainly is unromantic but has found the time to learn how to chase after a witchcraft loving Calabar harlot who knows he is a married man but persists in being a major pest in our lives. As an African American woman I have always loved the idea of marrying a educated ,tall and strong black man of West africa but I have been betrayed in every way. Talk about unromantic, disrespectful and unfaithful

Euchena