₦airaland Forum

I think so, especially when most men are busy cheating on their wives during their "business" trips;

abi o!!!!

From my experience, I think Nigerian men are very possessive and jealous.

Brussels

@ justmoi,
merci. I also appreciate your effort.

no doubt.

I assure you love is more important. If you are in a loveless relationship where money is present, you still feel poor.

Money and size of the u know what are not good enough.

I agree it's important to be able to cook but it should not be a role description for women. What's wrong in a man being better than his wife in the kitchen?

You are funny!! You sound superficial

What are you all talking about? There's no such thing as an ideal man. All the qualities you want cannot be found in 1 guy.

[quote author=G-reycells link=topic=17574.msg535115#msg535115 date=1154347644]We romanticize this love thing.Love is conditional. Very very. Even that between mother and child.

A pointer in that direction is the Yoruba cliche that says ' Ko si iya were' (this means 'the insane has no mother'. Every mother has favourite child and that even changes after heer wards become grown up. In most cases, the most affluent becomes the favourite child. That is as far as that goes.

Love in every relationship is conditional. Very conditional, I say! We all love for one reason or the other. You love a guy, maybe, for his prospects, for his cool looks, for his personality and other intangible value.


Our beaus here, why do many of you prefer to love within your station and not below it. I am sure we do not have anyone of us dating a leper, hunchback, cripple, deaf & dumb or any other person with physical deformities.
Love, in its altrustic sense has not been experienced on this plane, like it was when Jesus the Christ, was around some 2006 years ago.

We all love according the proddings of our ego. Once we cease to behold the attribute we love to behold in the confessed love of our life, the rest, as they say is history.

Love is conditional and that is why both the men and womenfolk love their partners for one reason and continue to cheat them and cheat on them for other reasons. ;DThe size of our ego is the measure of our love [b][/b][/quote]My friend, I do not share your opinion that love is conditional. I'm sure if you really loved someone, you would not have made such a statement.

But back to the topic of discussion. When you love someone as in for who they are, there's no way you'll cheat on them. I mean you'll fight the temptation. Naija men should learn how to love one woman through thick and thin. Men are not just made up of joysticks. I'm sure if you all searched yourselves you'd find something interesting.

@ Nia,

There's no need; You've done perfectly well!!!!

Exactly, Let's cheat away,

I'll ensure that my son takes your advice.

Come on, you guys are funny. I'm trying to be serious and you keep making me laugh.

looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool; How did I know you were going to say that?

[quote author=Jay-O-Jay link=topic=17574.msg533419#msg533419 date=1154273125]@faa. A general statement is an average statement.  There is always an exception in any case in life.  Man is not perfect only God![/quote]Mon Dieu, C'est incroyable!!!

Thanks to you guys (Mamaput and Jay O Jay) I learned something new. I've made up my mind; I'm going to cheat on my future husband, of course I love him but oh well, the devil in me is just too much. Also, thanks to your arguments, I'm 100 % sure he'll stay with me and love me. I mean, he doesn't want the society judging him (I'm sure the society cares about me).

Wow, THANK YOU *shakes their hands*. You've changed my life.

Come on guys, lets cheat away!!

[/sarcasm]

LOL,

Every woman is a princess? Wow, I never knew that.

@ Jay-o-Jay,

*Faints*. So every woman who decides to leave her husband for cheating on her automatically starts sleeping around. Wow, I must have come from mars.


@mamaput,

I don't think your examples should be reasons why women have to stay with a cheat. What do you care about what society thinks of you.

@ Nia,

You are blessed. You are the best!!!!! Everyone just seems to have travelled a million years back.

[quote author=Jay-O-Jay link=topic=17574.msg533336#msg533336 date=1154271432]@faa. Perhaps u've not read my contributions in the past on the topic.  I hate every bit of it and I can't stand anyone cheating a woman.  For your information I love every woman like my mother and I hate seeing her being hurt.  Even if I cheat, it does not mean I,m right nor is it my moral right because I'm a man & stand up to tell my woman, take it or leave it!  All I'm saying is, this thing happens not because u don't love your woman but because of the weak nature of man that can not take his eyes away from beautiful women like u, because of u women that can not stop making yourself look attractive. If I may say, one of the reasons why you make yourself look good is because of men!  I'm sure If u don't get a man toasting u once in a month, u will feel inadequate. I am just trying to be realistic, so don't get me wrong.[/quote]Maybe it's me but I do not actually make myself look good for men. Though, I get ur point. Eh! flattering doesn't work here. I see cute men everyday it doesn't mean I want to jump into the sac with them.

Of course, but I think a child's happiness is much more important than money. I know that most of the time when mums are unhappy the kids tend to be unhappy too. So it depends on how well you can control such a situation but I still think a man who cheats on his wife does not love her.

mamaput:
We are not talking about the good or bad in it, just that it happens.
And it happens everyday. so no need to be rude.
Fact is one dose not even need a reason to cheat it happens,

No offense but I do not share your opinion and I wasn't trying to be rude. It's just that it's shocking when people say it's natural for men to cheat and that the woman has to suffer the consequences and you are telling me women shouldn't have problems with that (leave her husband) is appalling.
That's my opinion and I do not expect you to accept it.

[quote author=Jay-O-Jay link=topic=17574.msg533245#msg533245 date=1154269272]@Mamaput. They are all living in fantasy island! Tell them!!!!!


We are not saying it's good but it happens everyday! They love their wives & they still cheat on them! PEOPLE STOP PRETENDING FOR GOD"S SAKE!!!!!!!!!![/quote]I'm not surprised cos u are a man looking for reasons to cheat and u men don't think with your heads ( u know the real head). I'm talking to bricks here!!!!

Well with that kind of attitude men will continue oppressing women. If the woman is angry at her husband for cheating on her, her kids won't be happy. Maybe you can afford to do that to your kids but I'm sure not going to take such nonsense.
I get the impression you care alot about other people's opinion about you but eh 1 piece of advice for you, u'll go no where with that attitude. You better get rid of that mentality.

How can "he cheated on me be a lame selfish excuse" to leave your husband. The guy is sleeping with 2-3 (if not more) and you think you do not have any justification to leave him? Are you waiting for him to kill you? Cos I bet you such a woman will die of anger.

mamaput:
Faa Let us call a spade a spade . Nigeria is a polygamous land.
That means a man can marry more than one wife. The first wife can accept it or go.
Many of us even if we do not admit it here, have cheating fathers and brothers.
If everybody thinks >>>> youThen no two people will ever marry.
by the way Love is not the same thing for everybody.

crappppppp is a fairytale "and they lived happly ever after" thinking

We aren't talking about Nigeria. We are talking IN GENERAL. A man who cheats on his wife, does not love her. I am sorry, it's not done. How can you say you love your wife but bang the next woman you see?
Besides, I don't think polygamous marriages are based on love. They are based on children and other issues BUT not love.

This is overwhelming. Saying 'I love you but I'll cheat on you because I'm a man, it's our nature'. *Yawns*, if a woman should do this, she'd be stoned to death, called a bitch, a slut or whatever. But when a man does it, it's his nature. Ha! What's next? Men are overrated.

The bottom line is; if my husband/boyfriend should cheat on me, *prepares bag* I'm off. He definately doesn't love me.

Seriously, how in the world can you cheat/hurt someone you love all in the sake of 'nature'. It's NOT in your nature! If men can do it, hell, women should do it too!

Try to be realistic, YOU CANNOT CHEAT ON SOMEONE YOU LOVE. That isn't love, that's your penis talking.

Quit thinking with your joysticks and start using your brains.

I'll put it this way. If a man thinks there is a chance he might cheat on his girlfriend/wife etc, then it would be wise not to get tied up in a relationship and I wasn't making any assumption. I don't think men reason with their head when they cheat.

Now to everyone who believes a man can love a woman and still cheat on her. I'll tell you all that you've been talking craaaaaaaaaaaap!!! The idea that you can even affirm such a statement beats the hell out of me. There's no way a woman in a right state of mind would have anything, I mean absolutely nothing to do with a guy if she's aware he's going to be paying visiting rounds to other women while she's supposedly his girlfriend.
I don't know if it's the Naija mentality, but 1 thing I'm sure of is that when you are in love with a woman you do not have eyes for another. If you find yourself wishing for other women then you are not in love. You just love the idea of someone loving you. I don't know why anyone would say yes to this question. Just imagine your father doing the same thing to your mum or your brother- in- law to your sister, the next time you feel like cheating on your woman.

nuellabond:
@ imomoh24

I do believe u in a way anyway but its not like the ladies don't have a choice. If a man says he really loves u and yet messes around then the relationship is bound to crash because he'll start comparing her with the other girls he deals with.Therefore instead of wasting ones time, the best thing to do is to call it quits with the guy and move on.

Thank you!!!!!

Seun:
If men are not full of the same emotion and sentiment, why do they get their friends when their girlfriends cheat on them? Afterall, it's "just sex" right? So why do you want to call down fire from heaven when she does it?

Preach it bo!!!!!
Thank God for people like you.