₦airaland Forum

Tinubuadvocate:
How many tyres ?

Two tires like Tinubu's two legs...you don't know how many tyres tricycle dey get. You were born and live in Tinubu's diapers.

newdawn2017:
I know u keep having sex with ur mother, ahab, imhotep

Your mama toto too wide. The last time I bleeped her no friction at all. Is she also in the same business with you...you and her who introduced each other to Olosho business.
Anyways, that one no be issue, the issue is that I get legit connect for you. One man for my estate here in Benin City, dey find girl his he goat go bleep...₦2.5million...are you in or out?

This is my email sir_fabrizio@yahoo.com, no let shame make you loose the money..btw you no even get shame

IsellSmartTvs:
Atleast,this kind of local achievement will compete with those imported ones,causing competition in the market value,which Inturn increases IGR,to make this our economy great once again.suffering don too plenty abeg

Good one. I have taken down your contact, I will get in touch for smart tvs...your moniker attracted me.

This will crash Keke prices.

We keep solving problems, other regions keep creating problems.

newdawn2017:
Bleep off u piggy nonentity! re we still in d olden days ?? No more old Eastern Region, dis is what u hopeless pigs re hidden under to keep attaching urself forcefully to brave, lush, fruitful & mighty , peaceful southerners. Stay in ur barren & land locked regions pigs.

Says a she pig from the pit of hell. Get a life, Olosho and internet trolling no go help you. Na your toto dey landlocked. Bet am pikin no fit come out from there...cos it's a goddamned landlocked piece of kpomo.

newdawn2017:
wetin concer abia with SS state?? Re we tribal brothers or same region?? Abia is East naa, compare it to d other 4 Eastern States pls. Stop dis stupid attachment to southners, we don't want, we hate u guys, we re brave, we re united, we re not cannibals, we re not pigs. Take note.

I guess they born your papa in 2020, during COVID-19 lockdown, if not go back to him and ask him the boundaries of the Eastern Region, also ask him if the Eastern region are one people.

I guess you go school abi? Then go to your dictionary if at all you have one at home or in your phone abi na porn, tik tok videos, fashion style apps full your phone. In case you get dictionary for your phone; check South South for your dictionary, snap or screenshot it and send it here. In case you no see am for dictionary, then go back to school and ask those who taught you South South for a refund.

Alternatively, you can ask Google the four cardinal points, or you use Bing search or DuckDuckGo...if any one lists South South for you, then your brain is intact

Finally na today I confirm say some people brain capicity dey small like peanut. Even the pig you said you're not; wise pass you. Na only South South you sabi, you never hear of North North or West West ...ezi ọfịa. I used South South because people like you will come out and misyarn. It was a bait and you're caught

AFONJAPIG:
Ngwa people are lazy and selfish, I was in Aba when this baboon took over, just 2 months as governor he went deep inside his village umuobiakwa Ngwa and recruit hundreds of Touts in his village to come and chase away market women of ndi ohuhu selling at the entry path of Ahia ohulu ( New market) in the name of making the city clean, abeg u fit bath pig Aba is dirty yeah do ur part and leave what was there even before they gave birth to your mother, street market is everywhere in the world even here I am , I shop in street market but its conductive and cheap than buying from mall, back to my story, they chased them away and burn the bus they came with, they are ran away, with the help of this baboon here they rallied themselves around and recruited all the criminals in ngwa land to come and chase street traders away, I was in sitting In front of my plat because I was living close to Asia ohulu, I saw hundreds of hungry Touts both males and females wielding all kind of weapons approaching en mass, I kuku ran downstairs and clock the gate because I knw It will end in looting and destruction of properties, these criminals of Ngwa started destroying of people's goods, stealing it, all thanks to useless Nigeria police they came with because boys would've shown then they has no place there, they vandalised all the vehicle on their path, destroyed and stole goods, this particular incident caused one young man his life, after all these what happened Nothing the same idiots are the ones collecting tickets selling potion of lands to market women , this idiot of ikpeazu locked Cs Park , personal business of Anambra man merely because the manager of the Cs Park lease the place to opposition party in Apga for his youth empowerment, I was in Cs Park aba that morning to wash my car when tens of police vans accompanied with Touts from ngwa drove in and sealed that place along with everything in there I jumped fence to escaped , my car was there for 3 months until he finally pushed the man to apologise in national news paper, for what ?? For leasing his business place to opposition, same ngwa people broke there are night to steal properties, I can go on and on , but one thing is certain he will end up with efcc, abi ndi ngwa has lose their voice since he came in ?

My man, Ngwa people made me hate Aba with passion. They extort you, can you imagine, my Landlord will get ultility bill from EEDC, he will hide it and tell us any amount he likes, na so this guy keep extorting us untill one day I gave it to him woto woto.

Their girls are horrible, bleaching and opens their legs to any fair handsome guy at reckless abandon. They no get shame. With 1 bottle of beer and pepper soup, you don bleep them. I bleep them tire sha. But they no add any value to my life. I stopped allowing them closer to me. You don chat with an Ngwa person for WhatsApp before? You will just weak reading his/her reply na there English die.

But why is it that they can't work?

Omo! Sokoloan defame me, tell my niggas I be loan prostitute, that I defrauded them, that I am wanted by EFCC

Omoh I shock o. How can I defraud fraudsters I come ask one of their agents one question?

"Shey my house address dey my loan application form, why not come my house come collect una money if they born una papa well"

AFONJAPIG:
Ugly twins.. abi their son got married early this year So his grand child from his son and this his ugly children will be dragging age mates... Ndi Ngwa dey fxxck dey breed like rat

Guy if you see as I hate ndị ngwa ehn...the most backward, selfish, entitled, wicked, evil, itibọrịbọ, hedonistic set of Igbos.

The highest block heads per capita of the entire Igboid tribes is found among the Ngwa people. No strength to work. They will sell their property and begin tax and fight you.
Tell me one Ngwa man that was useful to Abia State, Ala Igbo and Nigeria in general.

Abakaliki and Ebonyi people are more organized, useful than Ngwa people. Dave Umahi have shown the World the type of brains that Abakaliki people are endowed with. Abia cannot catch Ebonyi State again.

Of all South East and South South States only Abia without an airport.


Cross River - Margaret Ekpo Airport
Akwa Ibom - Victor Attah Airport
Rivers - PortHarcourt International Airport
Bayelsa - Bayelsa Airport, Yenegoa
Delta - Asaba International Airport
Edo - Benin Airport, Benin City
Anambra - Anambra International cargo airport
Imo State - Sam Mbakwe Cargo Airport
Enugu - Akanu Ibiam, International Airport
Ebonyi Ebonyi Airport, Abakaliki nearing completion
Abia State Abia Tower Umuahia

The federal government should appoint governors from other parts of Ala Igbo for Abia State. Since they are not capable to govern and develop their state. All of them keep embezzling funds meant to develop their state. No amount of money given to them will be enough, if you like give Abia the allocation of Akwa Ibom or New York they will embezzle it. You no go even see am being used to construct ordinary roads.

Abia is officially Igboland's prodigal son/promiscuous daughter

This is total bullshit man.

Solodu will defect to the next ruling party in your wildest dreams. Let me tell you what you don't know.
Firstly, The Anambra man thinks of himself first and Anambranians before any fellow Igbo or goddamn Nigerian. Solodu knows he is finished if he leaves APGA, he thinks first of himself, Anambranians than any Goddamn WEF agenda causing you sleepless nights for nothing sake. That's why the YPP Senator Andy Uba is not defecting, he enjoys the support of his constituents...he is a house hold name in Nnewi and the entire Anambra South. Ruling Party no dey reign in Anambra. Peter handed over to APGA governor he helped become governor before defecting to PDP. What brought Peter Obi to PDP was Goodluck Jonathan who promised him SGF. Goodluck Jonathan was rigged and Peter Obi had no option than to forge his own political future alone in PDP. His patience and doggedness may pay off this time. Should PDP return to Power with Tambuwal or Atiku, Peter Obi may Land VP or be the next President as he is still young and promising.

Secondly, All those occupying Agụ Akwa house post Mbadinuju, Ngige and Andy Uba have realised that the oligarchs and religious leaders move the masses to vote for you to win elections in Anambra State. The party in Aso Rock cannot win elections for you, if the Oligarchs, the Religious leaders turn against you. You will not win, no rigging will save you in Anambra State

When Soludo lost to Willie Obiano, he came out and made it clear that the Catholic church campaigned against him , that's why he lost.
Peter Obi was too generous to the Catholic church that they supported his Candidate Wille Obiano. He returned many schools to the Catholic and Anglican church, donated buses, places of worship, learning materials to Catholic institutions even in Enugu State. Bigard Memorial Seminary, Enugu is a case study. He donated a Hyndai Coaster bus to them.

Andy Uba failed in the just concluded elections he also blamed the Catholics that they didn't vote for him because he was of the Anglican Faith. That they campaigned against him. That's not true in some sense. The Anglican church themselves were those that claimed they were marginalized by Wille Obiano administration. They claimed all government appointments and jobs went to Catholics. So they now made the Catholic to realised that they Anglicans will enthrone nepotism if their own succeed in getting to Agụ Akwa house this is on the one hand. On the other hand, their main candidate Andy Uba have some bad record in the past that keeps working against him.

Now you said Soludo was an Economic hitman, was a member of Economic Advisory council headed by Osinbajo, that Soludo help ushered Nigeria into recession. Man that's another amala joint gibberish. Nigeria enjoyed the best economy since the 3rd Republic when Soludo was CBN governor, the naira was very strong...Okonjo Iweala also helped waive Nigeria's foreign debts. So in this present administration, it was Soludo that advised Buhari, Amaechi and co to go on borrowing spree right? It was Soludo that advised Emefiele to print money to send to states as allocations as Gov Obaseki revealed. Soludo accepted the membership of the Economic Advisory council because as a man with ambition and plans to become Anambra State Governor, he need not step on the toes of the Aso Rock handlers so that they will not work against him. He need to present himself as a docile and malleable fellow that will do their bidding. Very simple and street smartness.

Now the violence and insecurity in Anambra State was caused by Solodu not for any WEF Agenda, but because of his zeal to revitalise Anambra Economy that was retrogressing during the last days of Wille Obiano administration. He wanted to end the Monday sit-at home so that markets will open and workers will go to work. That's where he miscalculated, hence Biafra agitators who felt betrayed because they lifted the sit-at home order on the day the elections that brought him to power was held, the indirectly campaign for him because of Ojukwu the APGA founder... Soludo should have not towed that path, as it was sacrosanct to their agitation, that's why they decided to launch attacks in Anambra State on all fronts. He then made a U-turn and visited Nnamdi Kanu in detention to placate them, to show solidarity and sympathy to their cause. So in no distant time peace will return to Anambra State.

Your claims of West goading Russia into War, etc, I will return latter to dismantle them one by one...let me settle some tie-me-downs.

sylvestersamuel:
You won¡t understand the pains of heartbreaks until you experience it first hand.....imagine building a relationship for 10 solid years, then, someone just comes from nowhere and roof the relationship.


O wrong na!!!

The day my girlfriend broke up with me, i woke in the middle of the night, open my window, and screamed "Life no be so ooo, Chioma"


Heartbreak hurts fah!!!

Dude my first and only, heartbreak many many years I couldn't sleep for over 1 week. Each night I kept rolling back and forth on my bed. My head want burst sef. Since then I never carry my heart give woman...I view relationship now as a game of luck

This one no be news na. Almost all the Catholic dioceses in the East run microfinance Banks of their own.

Owerri Archdiocese: Chikum Microfinance Bank
Aba Diocese: Chibueze Microfinance Bank
Umuahia Diocese: Umuchukwu Microfinance Bank
Onitsha Archdiocese: Oluchukwu Microfinance Bank ( more than 20yrs old
Nnewi Diocese: Akuchukwu Microfinance Bank
Etc

They also have their own local news papers.

Time for me to join NATO cos Nigeria is not to be trusted with the security of my humble self, my kids and my wife.

I will begin consultations with my wife and my first son. Before weekend I will issue a statement on that.

Person fit kill you for this country and police will say na kerosene or water explosion, hence the need for all man to join NATO

All through my stay in Nigeria, I have never seen a state as peaceful as Edo State. Benin City precisely.

The rest are just one week one bad news.


As for those in the North, I don't pity any Igbo killed there. Na today IPOB warned all of Una to come home.

"If you think your 2 by 2 chemist shop in Sabon Gari, Kano will make us abandon Biafra. You are mad. Chineke Kpọọ gị ọkụ. If Fulani Janjaweeeed kill you there, you died a free death" --- MNK

NairaMaster1:
Don't mind him. Someone that is struggling with Ukraine is still looking for another thorn in his flesh.
The only thing left for Putin is his nukes.

Nukes just dey like Matchet. Most World Powers get their own, so if he use his Nukes, Germany,France,UK,US, Canada, Italy etc go nuke am woto woto

Demolakay:
U mean d same countries joining a league of nations,for protection can actually defeat Russia.And to think,if NATO ND Russia fights now,it will b just lyk dat? Russia will damn any consequences ND fight dirty,ND definitely will receive allies support too,it's definitely gonna b d end of d world.All d NATO countries tgeda are nt bigger Dan Russia.A nuclear bomb can clear almost all of Dem.All Russia needs to do now,is to court other countries too,ND collaborate.Nato is no threat, Russia is d threat to NATO,dat was d main reason d organization was founded in d first place.

I don't know o, I only dropped my phone call with Putin ..that's all

Good one. Apostle Chibuzor is truly called to serve God and humanity.

The young girl's death, though painful and gruesome, have opened doors for her siblings and family members. I think her soul will rest very well as her faith in the Lord Jesus Christ was not in vain.

May she continue to rest in God's abode.
God bless Apostle Chibuzor
Long live OPM

Finally Doctor Jesus is here

Cry me a River

Faber Vs Vladimir Putin few mins ago

Me: " hello sir e get 2 countries, dem wan join NATO, I wan make u invade dem...one Mr. Simon Ekpa dey make mouth say he go join hand fight u if u invade im japa country Finland"

Putin : " Aje wich countries be that, dem dey ment? dem wan collect? dey no born dem well"

Me : " Oga invader na Finland and im broda Sweden o, dey wan try u, to see as I rugged reach"

Putin : " Aje I bin think say na Chad and Niger wan join NATO. As for those ones free dem base on I dey collect woto woto for inside Ukraine"

Me : "hello..are you there..hello sir...hello can you hear me..." Omo! mad man Putin just hang up on me like dis o

If Putin dare Sweden and Finland, he will be fighting a triumvirate league of Nations... Ukraine, Finland and Sweden will join hand finish him. Stupid tyrant

Sorry we have run out of advice for simping niggas...you can check YouTube or Reddit

What we have here on Nairaland for simping niggas is curses

You want make we swear for your head, abi you want break up with that your community Toto

It's obvious she is the hope of the family. It's obvious the parents are working hard to give her the best education so that she will make them proud in the future.

Look at them now in pains and grief. "why God have you remained silent in the face of all these, are you dead, deaf or asleep"

Lesson to all those from poor homes like my humble self. Focus on your hustle/education, thread softly with wisdom until you get to the top. Nigeria no send you if you're not from an influential/wealthy family.

DonTattaglia:
My brother I wish I can send 1 cow and a carton of beer to u for this gladdening statement..

It takes a wise mind to spot a thought awakening statement. Remain blessed wise man

Totometer
a device to check the number of dicks wey done enter a lady pussy..that's the pussy milleage. E go shock you as the babe you want marry her milleage will be 500 dicks and 420,000 pounding

Cheat Detector
To know when your partner cheats. If you place it and it shows red, he/she cheated since Una last meet

That's the two device that will bring sanity back to the world

paulolee:
my guy. pass ur message using Nigeria or African stadiums...no refer to the Almighty camp nou because Nigeria can never build one in the next 3 decades..
the staidium can hold 100,000 fans, the biggest in Europe and its 65 years old meaning before we even got independence.
which Nigeria stadium get museum inside?? u de funny oo...

Hi Culer!

Be calming down, you're not the only Culer in here

Gerrard59:
Tomorrow, he will be the first to lampoon prostitutes but forgets that by patronising them, he is entrenching the industry.

I have never visited a brothel all through my life. I have never contacted a runs girl for sex..I have never done hook up. But as a young handsome man many ladies I meet would like me and them to have one or two flings. I know their green lights. If it goes well we bleep you go your way, I go my way.

I have never visited a brothel all through my life. I swear with anything you fear and respect.
I have never done online hook up, inmessage, coded runs or whatsApp hookups. I don't patronise prostitutes.

There are many ladies who are sex starved. If you dont know how to get them, then send me message I will teach you. Na those ones I usually have one or two flings with. I don bleep a girl who last had sex in 2018...sounds untrue right? Babe is damn ugly sha. But her tight and wet Puna was all that mattered...we don't bleep face sex starved girls plenty for town

Gerrard59:
Tomorrow, he will be the first to lampoon prostitutes but forgets that by patronising them, he is entrenching the industry.

I have never visited a brothel all through my life. I have never contacted a runs girl for sex..I have never done hook up. But as a young handsome man many ladies I meet would like me and them to have one or two flings. I know their green lights. If it goes well we bleep you go your way, I go my way.

I have never visited a brothel all through my life. I swear with anything you fear and respect.
I have never done online hook up, inmessage, coded runs or whatsApp hookups. I don't patronise prostitutes.

Olanre05:
Lol...your sisters that are yet to be married, do you follow them about and leaving your day to day activities. When last did you visit the hospital with them for virginity test. Well let’s put your Sisters out of this. Thank you. Ain’t you a serial cheater and a liar as well.

In as much as I have flings with different ladies. When in a serious relationship, I don't cheat. As for lies, I do tell lies when necessary. But am I am not a serial liar. If I tell you 1000 stuffs, lies fit be 10. My honesty score is almost 99%.

So madam am an honest guy

Olanre05:
Is It not men like you that used and dump those ladies you described as evening newspapers. After promising them heaven and earth only to come back to them with stories.
Everyone wants to marry well and right.
Remember you have sisters too, are they modest, are they as clean as a slate.
I’m against hook-up and the likes. But believe me you can tame a lady to be want you want her to be. Before you throw stones at others, are your own girls clean of stoning. I come in peace.

I have 3 sisters. The most senior one of them married in 2019 at age 25 as a virgin. I will drop her husband number, just send me your whatsApp. You can call the man and confirm..the remaining 2 are still virgins and suitors are already coming. My sisters are clean. I keep monitoring them and praying for them to get married and have a happy home.
Most of you ladies are ill - mannered, crude, proud, serial cheat, liars from the pit of hell and stupid that's why they keep ending the way they end.

No lady, absolutely no Lady on Earth will claim that she was not once chased by a guy who meant well for her, who truly loved her, whom she dumped in her quest for an utopic life that later eluded her.

You ladies are your own undoing, make una leave men alone. The one that dog bleeped na man cause am abi

Truthisunique2:
that's her way of signaling to Hollywood say she too wan belong

I really pity those who don't believe in Yaweh but worship Satan through its ministers like Hollywood

Na this kind talk dey cause religious riots. Let's leave both Yahweh, Allah and co to fight for themselves. Don't pity anyone for his beliefs.

In eschatological issues...are religions are confused. So focus on right living, humanity and being successful in this present world

this one na Halloween styled. E no make sense for an entertainment show