₦airaland Forum

nubian999:
And You're an Idiot... Glad WE cleared that up.

So one cannot express himself without getting insulted by ugly girls? Nubian, you are way more than this but I understand your plight though.

btw, being called ugly is not an insult, it is pointing out the obvious Miss Clear the Air

I saw a topic that says, do you like my profile picture? I made the mistake of clicking on her profile...

Who are the guys that liked the pishure? Una get mind sha.. .

Am outta here.... Please mamagee, next time put graphic picture inside ..

Lol... Been long I came here, phew, I remember those days we were strong romancelanders... Hihihi

So I was doing online and offline love with Cutebliss, #phew....

After office hours, I was supposed to meet with a girl for the second stage of our bedematical experiment. I got there, around mararaba. I looked for condom to buy then proceeded to look for Alomo so that the show will happen under toxic effect. Normally I no suppose dey kpansh the binsh... No be say she no fine o but I no trust am enough and my bulala fit no stand because of the issue.

I no see drink buy, I reach her crib, babe arrange me confirm pounded yam and vegetable soup. Na so she dey play with my head as I dey chop. For my mind I just dey pity myself. This babe dey gimme food to energize me. Talk about fattening cow na.

After I was done eating and the whole pre-intimacy stuff was underway, I don even dey finger fvck her sef when my phone ring. I look contact, Cutebliss. Choi, I been no wan pick but this babe force me.

Na so me and cutebliss gist for like fifteen minutes. Call end, I face shima wan continue, na so she tell me...

"Go and fvck the girl that just called."

Wa gbe mi, this babe dey east o. I do make this babe open, for where. Her puna wet die but to plug in na war. I no know whether make I vex with cutebliss or not. I just turn the other side sleep.Na around 3:00am this babe finally wake me up to staff o. By then her body dey hot like fire.

End of story and na my secret be this...

TOILET SEAT

Hello toilet seat,

Do you miss me? It's been long I came visiting. Now I prefer to seat on you and go through my social platforms. Is that good? Am I not supposed to write the greatest ideas or think it through while seating on you? Well, I miss you and I hope you miss me too.

There is something I've been meaning to tell you. At first I felt it would be somehow but now I understand better. I cannot keep quiet because it is of the utmost importance. I am in the dark. No don't get me wrong. I am not evil, I am just without knowledge of things. Yes, I know. I don't understand my country anymore.

Why? You may ask. The answer is not far fetched. Lots of things are happening at the same time that makes one wonder if all these were written in a giant script. No more bomb blasts or coordinated attacks, at least, the media doesn't report it anymore. But now the focus have shifted. The searchlight is now beaming on the south.

Oh, not the militants, they do theirs too but the media doesn't report it, we only feel the bites in petrol scarcity. Now it is a new evil. They call them the herdsmen. Yeah, the same Fulani that we grew up knowing to be peaceful and coexistant. They say they now move around with guns and attack recklessly. They are now the number one kidnappers in the south of all places and even if your goat goes missing, the Fulani man is responsible.

The people cry foul and the security agencies according to them fold their hands and look. Okay, you want to ask me questions? Go ahead...

Why did the Fulani stop using sticks for their cattle? I don't know but the few I've come across still use sticks unless something is happening down south that they are not telling us.

When did the Fulani become this reckless? The moment they were tagged the fourth most deadly militia in the world.

What is the government doing about it? They say he is their kinsman and making their attacks a top priority in a security meeting was just a smoke screen.

Enough of the questions toilet seat. I am done. I have to go now. Maybe we will continue this tomorrow, maybe not. Just know that I am in the dark and without knowledge.

Yours truly,
Joseph Success

True, this is frontpage material....

I want to have plenty likes but I don't have anything to say.

Oh, I do....

There was an incidence that happened to a Fulani man back then in school. FGC Kano, give me back up...

We were always going to see the man who lived in a hut close to school, one day while there, his daughter ran through the bush to her father's house o, no wrapper, her panties in her hands. Okay, the view was nice but something else completed the day, she was busy screaming.

"Baba, bana so. Buran shi babba ne kuma yana shan maganin buran tashi."

**father, I no want again. His manhood is huge and he drinks sex enhancement drugs."

Apparently her husband has no joy. O boy, imagine how Fulani man preek dey long o, come go join monkey tail.

We no laugh there na when we reach hostel...

LWTMB that day...

This happened to me when we were growing up in Deeper Life. During one of these youth retreats, I think SAY 2001, I was dosing off. Each time I close my eyes this usher was always closeby to poke me with a pen.

I got tired of dozing that I started acting like someone who was praying seriously. After some time, I dozed off. Slept off with no disturbance. My dream was sweet but unfortunately, it was one of those dreams that you fall from a height endlessly.

Brethren, I was at the edge of the of the row. My head was resting on the bench in front of me. When i fell in that dream, it was the ground that collected my body in real life. People laughed and I grinned. Usher came close and said...

"so you were sleeping..."

I answered...

" I wasn't o, I was actually meditating on the message that is going on."

The End...
If you no laugh this week go dey joyous for you. If you laugh i wonder wetin funny...