₦airaland Forum

CzarChris:
I don't much about a woman's psyche, but as a man. If a woman respects her man and treats him like a king, because truth be told all men including yours truly have a huge ego, feed that ego make him feel important. Believe me even if he just wanted to chop and run, he'll be hooked after playing around and finding out what he's got in you.
The truth about men is once or if a man cheats, he will most definitely come back home because he knows what he has in you, but once a woman cheats, it's over. Just forget about it. My observations though.

I know about the ego thing
What if two or three women around him know this same thing who will he then choose?

What if after massaging him balls and ego he still decides in his warped up, ego driven, self absorbed mind, that he wants another wife or a third or fourth. It is then he realizes he is an African man or a devoted muslim

I see complaints on Nairaland of men with narcissistic and terrible wives yet these men still stay faithful why? What makes them different from majority of their male folks don't they have egos Tobe massaged to?

CzarChris:
Exactly, it's a pity most girls don't think in this direction. Character matters a lot in keeping a man, or its unto the next one.

Naa a man that doesn't want to be kept wouldn't even if you give him a mixture of Virgin Mary and Beyonce


It's the same for women, a lady that would cheat would no matter how much love you shower on them

kennygee:


With the divorce rate these days. Yes I do.

With the kind of comments from men on NL, yes I do.

I saw a post where NL men were insinuating that Nigerian women don't deserve to be cared for and pampered, it made me feel sorry for women who would thank God that they had found "husbands" in these type of men.

Then, how many men really know God. Most men just go to church and some claim to be workers but don't live like Christians should. A man that can't lead you spiritually, what is the goal of your marriage?

So right especially at the last part
That scares me the most. How many men even ask for God's guidance in choosing a spouse, compared to the ladies

My greatest desire is a man who loves God, even more than he loves me. Yes because the love of God is the fear of God, and with the fear of a lot of nonsense we see in today's marriages will be taking care off, you don't have to be chief snoper there'll be peace.

You finally took down your mask?

Hi bigboyz32 can I use any type of laptop for this and any special apps I need

sukkot:
listen i aint ashamed of my age, if you want to see my birth cert let me know i will scan and post. like i said fashanu hosted the biggest game show in UK called the gladiators up till about 7 years ago which is about 2007 or so and he hosted it for close to 10 years. b4 the show they announce all his achievements. anybody over the age of 15 knows everything about fash the bash in the UK. so you dont have to be old to know who he is. by the way i removed you from my list. i dont like people who get in my personal business . feel free to remove me from yours

Really your birth certificate? You are funny
Why are you getting all worked up
Actually I believed everything you said earlier

Are you new on Nairaland

Because you are reacting like a newbie

Chill nigga, it's a faceless forum no need getting worked up


And remind me how I got into your personal business again?

sukkot:
nah nah nah this aint about me. i did not experience john fashanus legend. however i grew up in england and heard about it. its like how indomie generation heard about felas legend but never experienced it

I seeeeeeee

sukkot:
the guy is more than a sports legend. like i said earlier he hosted several groundbreaking shows on british television after his football career was over. he was a big celebrity in britain. he was more so famous after football. now i see where you are falling short, you think i said he is a legend based on just sports alone ? this nigga hosted the british gladiators show throughout the nineties.

and the nigga scored 149 goals. thats a lot of goals. you must be indomie generation if you dont know fash the bash is a british legend. or maybe you were just based in naija and not clued up about happenings in england during his era. back then there was no internet so maybe those in naija didnt know about him

Guy you Don old o?

emyibe:
this man is sure not happy. imagine been forced to take a picture with a shameless daughter who has a child without getting married. ime mkpụke. where is her dignity as a woman

People make mistakes everyday. Even you regret something you did

Would it have been better if she had done abortion?

Stop judging single moms sex is a two way thing

OkoYibo:
Who was the Angola Hall Chairman when Akeredolu was in OAU?

Who was the Class Rep when Mimiko was in Ife?

Who was the Awo Hall Chair when Fayemi was in OAU?

20 Years from now, you'll see that all these things don't count.

I always wonder where these people are

Maybe they are just making it silently

Not everyone will be a governor

VargasVee:
I think there's more to the story the Op isn't telling.
Have you heard such a silly excuse before?

Nothing surprises me any more
People get tired of their marriages for no good reason
At least he gave a reason

KevMitnick:
There is something wrong with your story. It appears incomplete. If we hear the guy's side of the story, we'll be able to assess the situation better.

He said he likes fair girls, chai

sekxy:
Ithappened to two of my friends but lem me talk about one..

Their relationship started this time last 5years. When this my girlfriend was just in her under 20's. So this guy came to her when he had nothing. Though it took this my gf time to actually accept him. Then I would advice her to at least date when she turns 20 at least to know a lot about relationship but due to her love for the guy she accepted him.

Then the guy graduated from university and luckily for him he went for his NYSC shortly when my gf accepted his proposal.. Then this guy would visit her without giving her anything, they were loved up and she was cool with it..she loved him so much that nothing about him pisses her off..

hmmm, so many times this my gf would go to visit him but because he doesn't have money she would transport herself...the guy then loved her.. Maybe because he was still broke.. I would then ask this bae if she cheats on him but she would say no, even to the extend that she doesn't club or do any social stuff because of his guy, she prays and encouraged him.

Fast forward to this time last year, the guy started making money ..bought cars and started building ..he has many investments.

Just last two months she called and was crying that the guy had broken up with her and I was like ...please calm down and tell me what transpired. .she said that the guy chatted her up to tell her that he likes light skinned ladies...and that he doesn't love her enough to marry her because of her skin colour..

I called the supposed bf and the guy was actually telling me he Will cheat on her if he eventually marries her...but this bae suffered with him all this while for 4years and he didn't notice her dark colour until he started making money.

Op I'm not playing

If your story is true, ask your friend if there is a recurrence of promise and fail in her life
Some people have that in them oo

Tell her to start praying seriously and while at it she should work at being a better person.

Kondomatic:
No guy leaves a GOOD woman who stood by him when he was poor.

Lemme Highlight Some Things.

1. Dating a broke guy doesn't mean you are a good woman

2. Dating a broke guy and building a future with a broke guy are not the same

3. Dating a guy because you've looked into his future and seen that he will turn out great is not love, dating, support or whatever you girls take it to be. It is an investment into his blessing with nothing and every investor losses.

4. If you date a guy when he was broke but didn't invest in him or support him(and prayer isn't the support I am talking about here, his mama prayers for him even in sleep) , he owe you nothing and can break up with you anytime

5. Dating a broke guy is like sponsoring a lady's education when she is not married to you, they come back with another guy instead of certificate most times.

If he says the girl has bad character, or is a cheat or is a liar I would still understand

But skin color?
Really nigga

Of all excuses it's her skin colour.

It shows the true intentions of the guy
It's not just about money, I wasted five years with you now you are saying I'm too black chai

I will swear for the guy if it's me

VargasVee:
No pun intended, but this sounds like a load of Bullshiit.


She's not light-skinned?

Lamest reason I ever heard, Or he didn't see her before when he was broke?


Ask Your friend, she is yet to tell you what she did.

But the girl called the bf and heard from the horses mouth na. What then is there to ask again
Must we blame the gurl


Sometimes I think these things are more spiritual

There are men and women that people will just forget when things get better

sukkot:
well fortunately for me I am not a christian. I consider myself a spiritual person and yes reincarnation is in the bible. elijah returned as john the baptist

matthew 11 vs 14 "And if you are willing to accept it, John himself is Elijah who was to come. <<< REINCARNATION

John 1:21 KJV
And they asked him, What then? Art thou Elias? And he saith, I am not. Art thou that prophet? And he answered, No.

John didn't reincarnate

26andsearching:
wow
all I needed to hear in one piece.
thanks for this advise.
u must be such a lovely lady.

U are welcome

Op do you know the irony of this post?


It is in the north where it's popular that men are more polygamous
If it is were so potent me think those alhajis would stick to their first wives and stop forking goats and fellow men.

A good and faithful man will remain so whether you use kayak Kanda or Maya or whatever

stagger:
Are you farming on the moon? N521,000 to setup a hectare of maize? Smething I just did on a heavily stumpy land which had been fallow for close to 6 years? Unbelievable!

Is it cheaper?

DarkRebel69:
And who says a vibrant, goal-driven, young adult cannot possess knoweldge should he faithfully commit to seeking for it?

What about my signature? Does it offend your priggish side? Or are you simply taken aback–in a good way–by the ingenuity of my wordplay?

When one is surrounded by guys your age who glory in small talk and speech devoid of depth , it actually comes as quite a surprise especially here on Nairaland

Priggish? Lol, you have no idea

I just went through it again and as one who appreciates the beauty in word play I LIKE IT

Initially all my mind captured was kitten and I juxtaposed it with your earlier comment about seeing women as sex objects.

DarkRebel69:
Who says addiction to pornography bears no malign ripple effect?

It's been observed that men who watch porn habitually are thrice as likely than male non-porn watchers to see women as nothing more than objects of crude sexual satisfaction, and also that these niche of addicted male porn-watchers tend to be more aggressive and violent toward the opposite sex than male non-porn watchers. Really, does pornography depict anything beyond male domination and the humiliation of females, especially as with acts such as “facial ejaculatiøn”, “bukake”, and in usage of demeaning language during penetration—all of which is cloaked by the unopposing and compliant body language of the female actor which goes the distance in suggesting that she is in fact relishing the degradation, hence entrenching the idea in the minds of chronic porn-watchers that such is the acceptable norm and standard.

What about the fact that addictive pornography could lead to depression, low sense of self-worth, and social anxiety disorder or inability to fuction optimally in social situations, especially one involving the opposite sex?

What about the fact that the fall of the domino pieces is put into motion the minute a person feasts his/her senses on a tableau showcasing erotic sex, and that if such person is unable to salve his/her sexual frustration by currying mutual consent from another, he/she is more likely to resort to that most dreaded jackboot option: Rape.

Yet you wonder how such exposure would negatively color the perception of an impressionable fourteen-year old boy? To worsen matters, you even compared the effects of addictive pornography on a kid still drinking in the first flush of adolescence to the effects of porn on a married couple who probably only indulge in the act on an occassional basis.

I fear that you are in fact a (insert apt expletive).

Wow a young guy with such knowledge, you are very correct



Your signature though...

sexybbstar:
Give him a "torchlight" head phone that has no SD card slot. Since it's just for him to make calls.

Story
Even when phones weren't in vogue some of us still found a way to watch porn don't ask me how looool

Where there is a will there is a way, you have to find a way to break that will to stop the action from repeating itself.

jejemanito:
I collected the phone - an android phone - and told him it is for less distraction purposes. But he needed a means to communicate with his parents so I gave him an old Techno java phone plagued with memory card issues

Guess what? He figured out a way to still use it to download UCbrowser then a batch of P*rn

Na for there I weak.

People fail to realize that wacthing porn is actually an addiction and should be treated as such.

In rehab You don't forcefully withdraw all tracies of the substance from the person, it would only cause temporary results, but he would go back to it and night even become worse

This is a very dicey situation and should be treated with care to avoid terrible results

I think you should do some research on the topic, why it isn't good and how to curb it


The goal is to make stop it, you'll have to employ wisdom with dat

First and foremost ask him how it started, if he enjoys watching it or it is just an habit that he knows it's bad but can't break from. You have to know if he thinks it's bad because If not you might just be wasting your time especially with an opinionated child.

If he knows the dangers then you could even tell him to Google articles on it and read it so he has a clear understanding of what he is delving into. Then both you can discuss with you analysing it more (you too should have read about it) and then linking those articles to his own situation eg porn can lead to feeling like mastubating, does it make you do so? he might lie because he dosent want the to see him in a worse light.

You will have to be diplomatic especially if he has an opinionated child
Please don't tell his parents, you would have lost his trust which is hard to get back.

I pray he is able to to break out of it, because these things lead to bigger issue like sexual promiscuity

nkwuocha1:
Had same issue as a very young man.I would sell off gadgets my elder brother send down from abroad to please my ex girlfriends. .Theres one sw lady that deals with jewelries and Turkey ladies inner wear in CMS patronise often to change my ex girlfriends pants those days .Till the last gf messed me up.


Well, I decided to give myself a BIG break and concentrated on my business and career for years. Yes! No gf and no intimacy. :-

Until I noticed a friend's sidechick. Very nice girl men. She would cook and bring to us in the field after Saturdays football match.Very nice lady. I would just sit one corner and watch her, wishing she was mine. Sincerely, good ladies are out there, wasting their time with wrong people. He finally married his university young gf. Me? I married the ex two months after she accepted to date me. My guy came for the wedding.

Focus on your career, observe alone, when the time is ripe you will see what you're looking for.

You married your friends *coughs*

Wow, I thought that was a no no for guys

26andsearching:
I don't know why am always meeting materialistic ladies

Although I didn't do much dating at school, but the few I had were so demanding. Meanwhile the reverse is the case for my guys.

Am not the stingy type, I love to go out on dates , once in awhile​ hand out not so expensive gifts but cool gifts. Send airtime if I can.

But the kind of gals I meet eh
Be like

I need money to make hair 3k...

I need money for one silly thing or the other and so on.

Virtually putting responsibilities​ that belongs to her father on my head.

I tend to yield to some because of konji sometimes, I can't die na

I always admire my friends​ babe. She is so content. I mean I can't even describe how cool she is.
She actually paid for my friends final year fees and supported him when he had family issues. I know there lot of ladies like this out there , but why am I yet to meet one

Okay this happened to​ me last week at ICM. Saw this chic looking all good. I didn't dull we started talking exchanged contacts , immediately we got home started chatting on WhatsApp , in my mind was already happy my have got an honest one.

Next day was a Saturday. Woke up na she they my mind

Started chatting immediately , cut long story short , she asked me for 3k , I nearly mad.

I mean am yet to even ask u out and u had to make that request.

This threw me off balance, and I had to take a long pause and think. It's really scaring me cos am in the point of my life where I have to be serious.

I just can't phantom out wat the problem might be.

Is that am too fine Cos hell yeah I am ( don't ask for my pic)

Or they money smell on me when I walk

Money isn't my issue, but I don't just want to build a relationship around a liability gal.

I would really appreciate good and solid opinions especially from married people.

Thanks

Well I understand you op I'm a lady
I've had roommates like the girls you mentioned, no girl started out like that just as men didn't start out as players bad experience causes these things.

The funny thing is the majority of simple and less demanding girls are always indoors or live a from work to house ' lifestyle so you might not see them more often

You sef when you go out stop looking for classy chick there is a 70 percent chance that that iPhone, bag and nice perfume she has isn't being financed by her 50k bank salary, duhhhhhhh she's not a money doubler

Try get a simple girl and clean her up to your taste
She will appreciate it more than all these girls were Don tear eye

Billyonaire:
There is something worst than HIV. It is called, the fear of HIV.

Wah?

Lol Dr dipo continue deceiving yourself and your sister
You could have told her to do her background check very well before going for her masters about who masters help? Except you want to lecture

What was she doing during nysc and law school internship? slaying I guess

That was the time she could have begun hustling, experience is what builds knowledge and confidence the hallmark of any lawyer even if you no get shishi yet

My friends sister just got another job (a lawyer) and she's being paid 50k

Even in law firms that they pay 70-100k they will so use you you will ask yourself why

The idea is to gain as much experience and network in the first few years
Law firms don't really pay that much cause they believe you are all colleagues and you can only give them stipends for transportation

Billyonaire:
What if he is loaded and is ready to take over all your living expenses and get you a convertible Mercedes ?

What if he has hiv

I hope they don't end up looking like their father

Good one

Just thinking though... What if he was the one with the problem and the wife was able to cover his secret all these while

You try But we still no go buy techno

pcguru1:
I hope so too, cuz these days people are no longer trustworthy and honest. But I will thanks for the comment i still apologize about my comment too.

No problem

pcguru1:
Oh sorry I thought you were a guy, I apologize for my insultive comment. The last part of your comment is true and for the taking a walk, if for some reason I end up with someone that will frustrate my life I will keep taking a walk, I grew in a troubled home so am not gonna spend a single day of my life living in frustration esp if its something that van be remedied.

Wow
I hope you meet someone who loves you enough to compromise and you must be ready to too with love all things are possible