₦airaland Forum

seunfly: You must be:
* Rich, even if you are a theif.
* Connected, even if it is drugs.
* Politician, even if you are a thug.
* Senator even if you rig election.
* CEO, even if you are poisonious to National industrial sector.
* DGs, MDs and heads of gov organisation, even if you are killing the organisation.






IN SHORT it all boil down to MONEY! MONEY!! MONEY!!! and MONEY!!!! Irespective the man's integritity, intention, image, indictment etc.

haba!

ebi30: U must ready 2 endure

lolz endure wat?

luvmijeje: Caseless ogini why u dey always stop me?
Well to answer d questn 4 u to date a Nigeria lady d guy has to be responsible,romantic,decent,respectful and faithful.

yo'baby...u gat it rite!

=> If u wanna date an Indian
girl, u must know how to sing....
=> If u wanna date an American
girl, u must be honest or she
shoots u
=> If u wanna date an English
girl, u must be brilliant in ur field
=> If u wanna date a Chinese
girl, u must know kung-fu or
know how to eat fly
=> If u wanna date a Russian
girl, u must be white
=> If u wanna date a Brazilian
girl, u must fix your front teeth
=> If u wanna date a Jamaican
girl, u must be black and rugged
=> If u wanna date an Italian girl,
u must be a sex enthusiast
=> If u wanna date an African/
Nigerian girl, u must be
______________?
If u gat no answer to this questn, jst roll over...no insult!

onila: no one nominates me

i did! Check 4rm d begining of this thread. Onila, d curvez explorer na evry minute u dey post. Sorry, buh am jst curious...u get any oda life outside NL?

slimyem: Thunder fire IZUKWU...the real one i mean!!

and rain no go quence the fire till he burns to ashez!!! He gat me

I wonder why people hate her as much as this. Buh me still lyk am sha

rokiatu: The only one?

He's freaking hot.

Why do you think I posted his profile pic?

very gud then

Shollypopz: https://www.nairaland.com/ogidi-olu Omo Yoruba with swag!

im b omoyoruba to fine

[quote author=gree-die]dats d real izukwu[/quote]why am I the only that think he's so cute? Or isn't he?

Idowuogbo: Lmfaoo!!! Dis gal means business

saw this coming!

livialives: Hello sexkillz is the miss nairaland competition still legit? The thread is locked and I can't post on there. Just saw the thread now. Apologies for derailing . Thanks

https://www.nairaland.com/livialives

oh dear...you look sexy and cute buh the nomination is over.#i tink. Well, u might still be consider in the voting era.#notsure

In case a restless postaholic poster can be considered; there is no one other than ONILA

rokiatu: https://www.nairaland.com/izukwu

I don't want anybody telling me this is some celebrity again.'

Even if it is, just keep it to yourself.

if say na im real pishor be dat, im be the guy we they wait for niyen. Im cute wella!

abiL: NL girls are obviously better looking than NL guys

u ar right! They aint cute enough joo

Haven't seen any other top poster other than you. Unfortunately, u aint qualified to contest.

abohrandy: common guys, she was just trying to b fun nau!! na wah oh make wuna easy on the systa.

the first reply was soo rude . if na me, we for don kill ourselves by now!! crap.

U see am so also. Dnt mind the thing. He's too dumb to tink straight. And i guess he's sense of humour is also stolen.

Lemme continue...
Victor started pleading for lizzy's forgiveness. She accused him tagging her a liar and accussing her of being unfaithful; therefore, she asked for a break up.
She wanted 2 walk outa him buh vicky wont let her go. He doesnt wanna lose her again.
YAWA CU.M GAS when Temi call lizzy right there.
After receiving Temi's call lyk dat of just a mere frnd, vicky dialled lizzy's number immediately. She was surprised wen her phone rang and saw dat it was Victor who's calling. She became more surprised when victor smash his own phone to pieces on the tiled road. U no sey slidin phone no dey get life? D tin cum scatter into pieces.
'Wat's it?' lizzy asked.
Vic: who just call you now?
Lizzy: a frnd of mine, Temi! Wat?
Vic: u saved his number wif 'His Majesty' and mine wif 'victor' jst a frnd, huh?
Lizzy was speechless. It was then she knew the reason 4 victor's smashin of his phone. She used to save victor's no. wif 'His majesty' until wen they fought. Since they started datin, she hasnt renamed him on her phone. She jst renamed Temi, 'His majesty' dat particular yesterday. She did so bcoz wen she was with Temi earlier, he was eager 2 know wat my frnd saved his name wif.
Victor snatch Lizzy's phone and walked away angrily. Lizzy followed him, screaming at him to give her back her phone.
Victor kept walking until he got to where there's a pillar and sat down. Lizzy tried to snatch her phone from vicky buh what she got in return was a HOT slap!
'did u jst slap me?'
vic: u nid not ask me! Lizzy, temme wat u want? Wat? I love u wif my whole life. Heaven knowz dat I rill love u! Who is he? Why?
Lizzy: u just giv me my phone now! U can beat me more. Wen u cheated on me, was i mad @ u? U even gave me d go ahead 2 call Wole! Temi is my new bf! I jst find myself datin him. I left Wole bcoz of u! I dnt rilli luv dem. U alwyz knw I luv u! Buh nau i hate u! (tearz started strolling down her pretty cheeks). I showed u Wole's msgz to me both on fb and phone. Didnt i? Cant u c i broke up wif him giving flimzy excuses? And i have been planning to break up wif Temi also. U said it dat i cant love 2 guyz! I tot abt it and knew it was true...i dunno want 2 hurt dem and datz y am getting out of d relationship. Now, i tink i av only Temi. Who sayz i cant luv any oda guy? Who sayz i cant live without u? Wat d hell do u tink u are? Even if u are d guy 4 me, i'd rather remain single! Vicky, u dare slap me?...etc
vic: buh u knw i cant live without! I cant luv any other!..etc...pls lizzy. I h8 myself 4 wat i did, i cant 4give myself. 4giv me plz!...(he went on pleadin)
Lizzy: i hate ur temparament.
She collect her phone and walk away while vicky kept following her and pleading.


So long palz! The question is, victor is sending palz and broz 2 beg Lizzy. Should she accept him back?
My frnd know dat she's quilty though ready 2 ammend, buh she's so scared of accepting him back. Vicky is the most cool guy I av ever known. I do tell my frnd dat she's lucky. Buh guyz can turn to something else! If victor of all guyz can slap Lizzy, know one knws wat he wud do 2mao. Shit happenz buh can dis shit b forgiven and forgotten?
Thank you all!

k2039: It's better they both path ways,that relationship will never work(trust issues will continue to arise from time to time).

Op from the way you narrated the story,I can bet my life that you are the one.

So Op,my 2 cent for you(because I know the story is your story),just forget that guy,if you expect him to change his ways,I can tell you from my long experience in the dating world that you will only be left dissapointed for the rest of your life.
He is insecure,insecurite breeds jealousy which in turn brings anger which in turn will bring more dirty slap.


Ya,I told you



Sent from my smart brain

Thank you! I thought as much. Think about this also.
Buh how can u b damn sure dat am d 1?
Well whether am d 1 or not is not d main issue. The problem on ground is.

abohrandy: i swear!! i am not a fan of break up and make ups!! i prefer we go silent for a while and den resume later no announcing that we broken up and den later commence the whole show again!!

about her accepting the dude again, i will say he is way passed his bed time!! and lady-beaters are so yesterday. there are better ways of handling a lady and not laying ur hands on her. thats just not right!!!

so i will say let her get anoda guy in her life, this victor dude is just too insecured for ma liking!!!

yeah! U got it right!

Pls my friend needs ur advice on this issue urgently.
Lizzy(my frndz name) is in luv wif a cool dude, victor. Everybody know dat victor lovez lizzy. He's crazy 'bout her. But they do fight alot! Victor has the fearz that lizzy is cheating on him; coz she's d girl evry guy want. Sumtimz, he startd accusing her of cheatin on him; while she wasnt! This made my friend swear wif a bible, jst to make him forget his fears. She even tried to break-up wif him dat day. Buh victor came back begging wif his friendz and brotherz. She accepted him back.
Again, lizzy found a girl's msg, whom victor had claimed 2 b his ex, in his inbox. It read thus: 'wow! I have never enjoyed sex lyk dis b4. I rilli enjoyed my nite. I will marry u, victor! I luv u.'
my frnd nd victor dnt av sex! Jst romance.
lizzy just smiled after reading this. She was teasing victor. She was lyk; 'vicky, bad boi! Hmmn...i dunno ur banana is as sweet as dis...'
victor denied havin anyfin 2 do wif his ex, buh lizzy wasnt as dumb as believin him. After tryin all his best 2 convince her to no avail, he said 2 her: 'wat ar u plannin 2 do now? U wanna go nd start datin those ur "toasters"?' and lizzy said yes. He gave her his phone and lizzy called a male friend. She told d guy dat she's ready 2 b his gf. Victor was lyk is dat all? Common, call more guyz! Buh lizzy jst walk away.
Oneday, victor called her and told her he cant share his gf wif any oda guy, dat he wud leave her 4 wole, her new bf. So they broke up.
A month later, vicky came bck pleading. He tried all his best; giving her gifts and taking her out, and she accepted him bck.
Yesterday, my frnd was wif anoda guy, Temi. She started datin him wen vicky and her broke up. She had broke up wif wole wen victor came bck pleading bcoz she doesnt rilli luvs him.
Victor called her when she was wif Temi;
vic: where ar u?
Lizzy: am in my bf's house.
Vic: lizzy, temme u ar joking!
Lizzy: (she laughs till Temi went out 2 get sumting den continued her conversatn wif vic) victor!
Vic: temme u love me.
Lizzy: i luv u vicky. Kiss me *muah*
and vicky hang d call. Then Temi came in.
Later, vicky called her again, buh lizzy behaved lyk she cudnt hear wat victor was sayin. Wen he calld again, Temi pickd d call nd giv d phone bck 2 lizzy.
The problem arises wen lizzy got 2 her mum's shop. She saw vickky nd went 2 meet him.
Vic: where ar u comin 4rm?
Lizzy: d market wif my frnd, Lilian nd her bf!
Vic: who pickd ur call? U told me u were in ur bf house!
Lizzy: i was jst kiddin! My frnd's bf pickd up my call. He did wen i cudnt hear u clearly!
Vic: u ar lying! I can leave u 4 dis! Call him now!
Lizzy: i dunno have his no!
Vic: call ur frnd then!
Lizzy dialed my no nd i hrd shouting.
Lizzy: victor, i will call lilian now and u will confirm dat i went 2 d market wif her nd her bf! Her bf pickd my call!
Vic: Call her nau! Am ready 2 lie on dis tile road, jst 2 beg u if lilian can confirm ur story!
Meanwhile, she had dialed my no already and am listenin 2 their conversatn.
Lizzy: ok, i will! Buh ve it in mind dat dis our relatnship wud b a history.
Vic: jst call her!
She did as if she's jst diallin my no, den put it in speaker!
Lizzy: lilian! Lilian can u hear me?
Me: sup dear. Yes i can
lizzy: where did we go 2?
Me: go to? U mean dis evenin? Cmn, we went 2 d market 2geda nau wif my bf!
Lizzy: tnk u! Was it nt ur bf dat pick up my call?
Me: sure, he did. Wen...
Lizzy: God bless u my lilly girl. Tnk u. Its victor again o. C u on monday.
I laughed and laughed.
Victor started begging!
But d bomb blast wen...AM COMING.BRB!

ndukwejoe: good one permissions to copy.

u ar free to buddy

Warri Bible is finally out...Grab your copy now!!!
Sample version:
English: As it is written in the bible
Warri: As dem yan 4 bible
English: jesus entered the boat with this disciples!
Warri: bros J cum enta canoe with I'm padi dem!
English : As the boat was sailing,there was a great storm!
Warri: As the canoe dey move na I'm yawa cum gas!
English:.the storm waz so great with it was like a whirlwind!
Warri: As the yawa dey gas na I'm kasala brust join!
English: the disciple became so afraid and they shouted Master! Master!
Warri: na im liver fail im padi dem, na im dem begin dey hala Bros eh! Bros eh!.
English: jesus got up and calmed down the wind!
Warri: na so bros J get up kon arrange the mata!
English:. He turned to his disciples and said oh ye with little faith !
Warri:.na im bros J luk im padi dem shake im head kon provoke "O BOI ! Una fail ma hand oo!
English:.the disciples replied and said what MANNER of man is this
Warri:..im padi dem kon hala. "SHOO"bros J which level nan! U BE WINSH

makizee: It is just a matter of time before this poster will post " how drinking water will lead you to hell fire"

It is just a matter of time.

wagbayi broz! I no knw sey no b only me c am so.
Oga poster don yoo

donguutti: As a male, i would say its more difficult being a Female,
1. the thought of having a monthly bleeding cycle is a NO for me

2.The specter of having a pot-belly for 9 months only( i prefer longer durations), Ante-natal , Labor etc ,
is just too much for me.
3.The possibility of a baby sucking my breasts gives me goose bumps. (What if a problem child bites my nipples)

4.The prospects of wearing high heels , mini skirts(with my hairy legs) is just to scary to imagine .

Females especially mothers tend to think, care and worry alot........i dont have the strength to do all that.
BABA G_D, if i would be reincarnated in my next life,please dont make me a female, i am not strong enough.
Even if its not possible for me to return as a guy , then i prefer to be a TREE, a Rubber Tree in particular,
*******^{at least i would be used as raw material in making latex and *******}

naughty boi!

[quote author=Mynd_44]SMH[/quote]
Am so keen abt her buh nt jst lyk her being in Illuminati. So, can u explain y u wan shake ya head fly off, broz?

[quote author=oke_chukwu]Job title with repect[/quote]Na so o