SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/funny-introvert-signs.html

In this age and time, being an introvert does not seem to be what anyone easily admits to....readily, everyone is trying to prove they have the requisite social skills of an extrovert.

Between, here are funny but real reasons why you just might be an introvert...do read on!

1. You think before you talk and check before you chat
Sort of the right thing to do huh?...You have a consistently running internal monologue that screens every word before it drops from your mouth. Not a fast speaker there...You screen your chats too severally, before you send them...lol.

2. You go to parties -– but not to meet people.
Nooo...you may not necessarily be hanging out alone...but meeting new people is rarely the goal of attending a party. You simply get in your safe harbour- looking out for your friends and hanging out with them.
3. Great speaker, fearful mingler
You may not be shy...infact, you can give a great speech in front of 500 people but mingling with them one-on-one afterwards is a huge problem.
4. You hate idle chatter
You can be in a room with room mates with them discussing on a topic without necessarily making a contribution...you hate small talk not because you hate people but because they seem meaningless to you.

5. You are self conscious
Since you are not doing most of the talking, you are doing most of the observing and hence, assume that everyone is observing you in the same way...judging the way you speak, your accent etc....whereas, they might not necessarily be doing so,
6. You like extreme sitting positions
When you have to sit at a bench, you don't sit in the middle because you don't like being surrounded by people on all sides. In church, you prefer the extreme rows of seats to the middle ones.
7. You dread audience participation
You prefer a talk or a lecture to a discussion or interaction. If you must be involved in the latter, you must have been informed earlier so that you can "compose yourself".
8. You've been accused severally of not keeping in touch
The funny part is that you cannot fathom why someone who called you three days back would call you and say something like; "You have forgotten me abi..."and you're like, "Are we supposed to be talking everyday"?....you also do not like midnight, except its utterly the last resort. For you, it's too much time to waste on "nonsense talk".
You screen all your calls and you may not pick up your phone even from people you like only to call them back as soon as you’re mentally prepared and have gathered the energy for the conversation.

9. You're a Writer
...a good one at that. Or sometimes, a poet. You prefer to put your ideas in writing than to speak them because the former gives you the opportunity to perfectly choose your words and structure your thoughts.

10. Friends made you and not the other way round
Check out the list of your closest and distant friends and you'd realize that they made more efforts at being your friend than you did at the initial stage before you settled into the friendship.

If you can boast of some of these qualities, then check again...against your initial judgement, you just might be an introvert!

In case you missed 12 shocking habits of Nigerian ladies, click here

Alright people...thought it was worthwhile to add the male version of shocking habits Nigerians are proud of. You asked for it, and now you have it...!

NOTE: Not all Nigerian guys are engaged in these bad habits; some are much respectable and disciplined too...but actually, a good crop of them do some of these things without thinking them to be anything at all... Let's branch on...!

1. Taking time to rotate pictures of beautiful women on their DPs without ever deeming it fit to upload theirs.
2. Urinating everywhere and anywhere, including beside the road.
3. Forgetting to have their bath on weekends, public holidays and after sports.
4. Keeping bushy armpits, staining their shirts with sweat...and still offering a protective hug...yuck!

5. Drooling and staring at women, especially when they pass by or are seated next to them.
6. Bragging about any little accomplishment...their fathers' houses, fathers' cars- most times, accomplishments that are never theirs. The funny one is when they go as far as bragging about a celebrity or sports person...you'd hear something like; "Dbanj, that guy is bad! He has this, he has that...mehn....!..." And they go on and on and on as if the person in question is their elder brother.
7. Wearing dirty and smelly stockings. If some guys remove their legs from their shoes...oh, goodness...you'd feel like throwing up! Singlets and boxers are also worn for days and indeed, weeks!
8. Staying glued to their gadgets, especially computer games. Some guys are so addicted that they play till their thumbs hurt from the game pads, only for them to add plaster and still continue with the game...highly irrational!
9. Bringing a spoon when another guy is eating and joining in without permission, all in the name of "my guy"!
10. Taking pride in carefree and self-done electrical connections....wires joined with wires with no sort of taping or soldering. As long as it can conduct electricity, any connection does not necessarily have to be decent.
11. Having no definition of personal property...an average guy can share even a toothbrush!
12. Killing themselves over football and its induced arguments...worse still, attaching themselves possessively to foreign football clubs and saying words like "We have bought Mikel Obi" as if Chelsea coach knows they exist...!

Guy, I hope some of these things are not true of you o...lol!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/bad-habits-Nigerian-guys.html

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/toyin-adegbola-political-appointment.html

Hopefully, we'd still get to see her face in Nollywood flicks...

Yoruba actress, Toyin Adegbola (Asewo to re Mecca), joined the train of actors and actresses who have been appointed into various government positions recently.

The actress who once worked with the Broadcasting Corporation of Oyo State (because) has been appointed to the board of the Osun State Arts and Culture Council.

Big congratz to her...!

Hehehe...this one is by-force patronage o...!

Players of the Super Eagles team have come out to complain against one of the coaches of the national team who has been mildly forcing players to buy his expensive wristwatches.

In a statement to Punch, one of the players who spoke on a condition of anonymity clearly stated that the wristwatches were cheap products in Europe, costing between $500 and $1000, only for him to sell it to them at $10000, an amount times ten of the initial price.
SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/eagles-forced-purchase-wristwatches.html

If they don't buy the wrist-watch, it is another wahala entirely....The players said they became enemies of the said coach if they refused to buy the wristwatches from him.
Another player based in Europe said; “Before I moved to my present club, I was on an apprentice contract, which means I wasn’t collecting much money but the coach forced me to buy the watch.The same thing happened to me, when I was invited to the senior team. It is not good for the team because a lot of players are grumbling, though they can’t come out and say it.”

An official of the team confirmed the story to the Punch saying, “I have heard about the story before but the Eagles media officer, Ben Alaiya, denied any knowledge of the illegal transactions, saying that if at all it is happening it is a private transaction among those involved.

Hmnn...you go fear marketing strategy na...!

For a religious country as India the recent cases of heightened sexual violence comes as a rude shock...!

Mumbai police have disclosed that a young female photojournalist was gang raped while on an assignment.
The attack took place in a textile mill while her male colleague was tied up and beaten in the business hub of Mumbai.

After initially offering to help her get permission to shoot inside the building, they became aggressive and accused the male colleague of being involved in a local crime.
When he denied any involvement they tied his hands with a belt and took the woman to another part of the building compound and took turns raping her.

As the Daily Mail reports, the woman was working on an assignment with a male colleague to take pictures of the factory last night when five men confronted the pair.
This is not the fist time a gang-rape will be happening in India. In December there was the gang rape and death of a young university student in the Indian capital that shocked the country.

One suspect has been arrested and the other four identified. The woman is said to be in stable condition in a hospital while protesters have called on the courts to hang the rapists.

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/indian-photojournalist-gang-raped.html

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/Jonathan-praises-Sokoto-Sultan.html

Sultan of Sokoto, Alhaji Muhammed Sa'ad Abubakar 111 celebrated his 57th birthday yesterday amidst pomp and pageantry.

In a letter to the celebrant, President Goodluck Jonathan extolled his qualities as a lover of peace, unity and development in the country.

In a statement issued by President's Special Adviser on Media and Publicity, Reuben Abati , he was quoted as saying;
“As you continue to use your exalted throne to promote the cause of peace, unity and positive development in the Caliphate and across our nation, I commit you into the hands of Almighty Allah and pray that He continues to prosper you and bless you with robust health and many more years of enduring fulfillment.”

He also prayed that God Almighty will grant the monarch, who is also the president-general of the Nigeria Supreme Council for Islamic Affairs, many more years of worthy service to the nation.

Happy belated birthday to the Sultan...!

Port ambassador, Saka (Hafiz Oyetoro) had a birthday party organized in honour of him by students of the Adeniran Ogunsanya College of Education where he lectures. Talk about simplicity and I like Saka for it... *don't be deceived, the guy has chopped MTN's money o.... .

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/Saka-at-50-photos.html

Hehehe...read this amazing story of how a handsome young man was deported from Saudi Arabia for being too hot....!

Omar Borkan Al Gala, a poet, actor and photographer had been on visit to Saudi Arabia for the Jenadrivah Heritage & Cultural Festival when the country's authorities deported him and two of his colleagues on the basis that they had tendencies to “corrupt the country’s women”.


Arabic newspaper presents it as a pro-active measure as the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vices of the state reckoned he was just too hot to have around the country as there were fears that “female visitors would fall for them”. He was swiftly deported to Abu Dhabi.

*Laughing...seriously, this is so funny...I suppose the virtuous women love hot guys then...! Is over-protection the surest means to promote virtue...? Pls discuss...!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/hot-man-deported.html

It was a sad incidence yesterday, Sunday, at the palace of the Olumegbon of Lagos in Isale Eko and 30 other rooms in the compound were razed by fire.

Although the cause of the fire could not be ascertained, the Lagos State Fire Service told Punch correspondent that the likely cause was an electric surge. The fire which started about 7am lasted for an hour before it was put out. According to Olumegbon's brother, nothing could be salvaged, neither was any life lost.
The structure of the palace, made of ancient clay and situated in a compound which has another building with over 16 rooms made it easy for the fire to spread fast. So severe was the spread that it got to Ojuolokun, which is the next street.

“We have put out the fire but unfortunately, the fire has damaged almost everything. Many of the buildings in the area are too close together and this made work difficult for us. The wiring in the area is also very porous", said the Director, Lagos State Fire Service, Razaq Fadipe.

Lagos State Police Public Relations Officer, Ngozi Braide, said policemen had cordoned off the scene of the fire. She added that at least 30 rooms were affected.

SOURCE:http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/olumegbon-palace-gutted-down.html

Mother of two, Tony Braxton, was down performing in New Brunswick, NJ, earlier this week when a nylon ensemble she was wearing gave way, exposing her butts.

The singer and mother of two who apparently had no idea her skimpy cloth had fallen out of place, went ahead to turn her back to the crowd amidst cheers, jeers and laughter. More photos after the cut:

Toni just kept singing, until a guy on stage handed her his suit jacket to cover up. It was a huge wardrobe malfunction but really, the cloth was too light and skimpy in the first instance. What do we ladies get when we throw away every iota of decency in a bid to be "hot"?...hot embarrassment...!

Check blog for photos.

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/wardrobe-malfunction-tony-braxtons.html

This is the amazing story of a black man who served in the white house and made friends with generations of American Presidents for 32 years...!

Eugene Allen worked in the White House as a butler from 1952 to 1986. His appointment at the presidential house came at a point when racism was trending, yet he managed to scale through. Married to Helene Allen for 65 years with son, Charles Allen, Eugene remains a personality to reckon with.

According to the Washingtonpost (2008), President Truman called him Gene. President Ford who happened to be his birthday mate liked to talk golf with him. He saw eight presidential administrations come and go, often working six days a week. “I never missed a day of work,” Allen says.


His is a story from the back pages of history; a figure in the tiniest of print. The man in the kitchen -he was there while America’s racial history was being remade: Brown v. Board of Education, the Little Rock school crisis, the 1963 March on Washington, the cities burning, the civil rights bills, the assassinations.

He was fond of all the eight families he served but was fond of president J.F Kennedy the most. According to his son, Charles Allen, the first day he saw his father cry was the day president J.F Kennedy was assassinated.

This highly respected butler was able to keep the secrets of these presidents and even refused to sell his story despite numerous requests from various bodies. 'The Butler', starring Oprah Winfrey as Helene, is presently one of the most anticipated movies.I definitely can not wait to catch a glimpse of what Eugene's life in the Whitehouse as a butler must have been like!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/Eugene-Allen-inspires-film.html

A Kenyan comedian, Eric Omondi, has been rebuked for going too far with his joke on one of Jesus' miracles...

During a recent comedy show that was also televised, Eric made a comic strip where he was in Kisumu and aping Jesus, he pretended to turn stones into bread. He then asked his ‘disciples’ to bring fish, which he then proceeded to multiply as well.

According to reports however, Nairobi Pentecostal Church where he is a member did not buy the joke and cautioned him against over-stepping his boundaries in deriding the religious figure.

http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/kenyan-church-rebukes-comedian.html?showComment=1376857311490#c2644170372004203145

The start of the premier league is the beginning of excitement around the world,as the world's most watched league kicked off yesterday, 17th of August.

So many people can't wait for the start of it's resumption as this would bring life back to the streets for discussions,argument at news stands,betting,and most of all the excitement and fun in watching top class clubs battle for the prestigious crown of becoming the champion of England.

The ceaseless drama would spark into light as clubs in the premier league have been making remarkable signings with the likes of Robert Soldado, Luis Alberto, Sanogo, Negredo, Jesus Navas amongst others joining the English clubs.

The reigning Champions are without their Iconic Sir Alex Ferguson with David Moyes taking over to make sure the title stays in Manchester United . The special One 'Jose Mourinho' is back at Chelsea to make the Premiere League again. Arsene Wenger is desperately on the verge of winning a title after 8 years going without a trophy and the Emirates fans running out of patience.

Manchester City have made big signings just to have their hands on the prestigious title again after hiring the expertise of Pellegrini to take charge. Liverpool and Spurs are also making signings just to break into the top four again.

But what is your take?...how much drama do you think lies in store?....Who's going to wear crown? Do "branch" on....!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/who-wins-English-premiership.html

In such high altitude, fearless professionals, Emily Sukiennick and Hayley Ashburn, did not think it twice before performing ankle balances, squats and even the splits in front of a camera.

Even the photographer, Jared Alden, 31, was amazed at the girl's jaw-breaking moves 3,300ft up in the air at Taft Point, California. The photos do not only combine the creativity of an athlete but also such boldness that cannot be described.

The photographer who said he gets varied reaction to the high-lining images was however, quoted as saying; "Good fortune is to be somewhere amazing photographing amazing people who are doing amazing things on an amazing apparatus".

Remarkable images, he did get there; but I hope nobody gets an "amazing" fall soon o...!


SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/fearless-high-mountain-moves.html?m=1

Wow! Isn't it exciting that superstars who have been the subject of discussion over-time over their affairs outside wed-lock have finally taken the bull by the horn and are getting married- left, right and center? *It is never too late to finally do what is right.


Finally, Peter Okoye of P-Square proposed to his long-time girlfriend and mother of two children, Lola Omotayo, in a grand style. With a brand new Range Rover Evoque, bouquet of flowers, a hand written sign and an absolutely stunning diamond ring, he treated the woman to a romantic proposal.

And guess what? She said "yes"!

Looking forward to their wedding, it's congrats to both of them and their children too!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/Peter-proposes-to-Lola.html

bishopoliver: 150 million mumu will act as if they didnt see this

So true...

Afrobeat musician, Lagbaja calls the vast majority of Nigerians "several millions of mumus inhabiting a mumudom" in this article which he wrote as a response to an earlier one by a writer, Okey Ndibe. He said:

"Dear Okey Ndibe: Thank you for sounding the alarm in a way that should make us reflect deeper. Mumu is not a condition I proudly proclaim. It was with a heavy heart that I came to this shocking realization that we are indeed a country of mumus. Harsh as it might sound, no other explanation would suffice. It is apparent that the “leaders” know that they would always get away with whatever incredible schemes they concoct because, amongst other reasons:

(a) the mumu people they “lead” are no different from their mumu “leaders” in character
(b) the mumu people are gullible, superstitious and naive
(c) there are no consequences for criminal acts if you belong to the right group
(d) these mumus never demand accountability from their “leaders”
(e) the mumus expect their rulers to loot or would otherwise consider them foolish"

Source: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/principles-of-mumuism.html

As I opine, it is not just the mumuism that is catching my interest now...but the prolific nature of the mumuism. 45 indicators of Nigerian mumuism in just two weeks? Wow!...you should read this...

"1. 5 members trying to impeach a governor would make you think there are probably only 6 or 7 members of the House of Assembly. According to the assembly’s website there are 31 members. For mumus, 5 out 31 constitutes a majority.

2. In the land of mumus you can make your own mace and confer it with automatic authority, elect a “new Speaker” and swear him in.

3. No single hospital in Nigeria to entrust the unfortunately injured member with. He had to be flown to the UK.

4. Flown abroad … likely on tax payers’ account

5. Treated … likely on tax payers’ account

6. Visited by officials… likely on tax payers’ account (business or first class tickets?)

7. Nyesom Wike the Minister of State who led the visit was until recently the Governor’s (Amaechi’s) Chief of Staff. He was allegedly nominated for the Ministerial position by Governor Amaechi.

8. Shouldn’t the mumus wonder how Nyesom Wike as Minister of State for Education found the time for this all important trip while abandoning his post in spite of the raging crisis in his ministry with the Academic staff union of Nigerian universities currently on strike? Well the mumu staff and students can rot in hell I guess.

9. Madam Patience would probably have “visited” too, if not for the noise such would generate. So for now, the victim suffers alone.

10. The erstwhile pontificating police boss of the State could not find the patient’s prominent attacker for over a week.

11. Madam Patience having first denied any involvement in the crisis while verbally attacking Soyinka, eventually owns up “pouring out her grievances”.

12. She owns up to a group of visiting Bishops who came on a peace making mission to find a lasting solution to the crisis in their region. Religion is always an easy scapegoat and tool of deception in mumudom.
13. Why would you even think that the Bishops would go back empty handed? Any “transport fare/thank-you-for-coming”, if received, would have likely been financed on tax payers’ account.

14. And why are we ranting about “tax payers”? Why are the tax payers not furious over the incessant misappropriation and misapplication of their hard earned contributions? The answer lies in the question… Aside from PAYE, how many are compliant in mumudom?

15. First a set of 5 Governors and 3 Deputy Governors (representing their respective Governors), left their duty posts for a solidarity visit with the embattled Governor of Rivers State… of course to the detriment of tax payers. (a) They were not on leave, but left urgent work and duties behind for the “emergency” solidarity visit. (b) Flight to and fro Port Harcourt of course likely on tax payers’ account.

16. They were closely followed by a second set of 4 commiserating sympathetic Governors. Of course, again likely on tax payers’ account.

17. Madam Patience’s grievance, as she divulged to the visiting Bishops, started when Governor Amaechi refused to be governed by her, as he would not listen to her veiled orders on how to govern the State… which incidentally is her primary territory being her State of origin. Mumus have no problem with that, fully being in harmony with her as she sings as first lady in Abuja while simultaneously dancing in absentia as Permanent Secretary in Bayelsa and conducting the orchestra in home state, Rivers.

18. Madam ends her confession to the Bishops by saying that Amaechi is her son as she is obviously the mother of everyone in mumudom. The question all mumus should ask is, “Would a good mother promote the demise of her child?”

19. Where was her outraged sense of motherhood when Senators were busy voting to turn mumudom into a Nation of pedophiliacs at the expense of her innocent “daughters”?

20. Where was her outraged sense of “mother of the Nation” when the video of 5 gang rapists went viral. Has she used that “mother of the Nation” power to find the culprits? Not a priority in mumudom.

21. Where was her outraged “motherhood of mumudom” when 46 school children were murdered in Yobe? Indeed the whole Nation of mumus have just gone on with their more important mumu lives like nothing happened.

22. Which brings us to the insane mumurity that gives the “leaders” confidence to try pranks such as the attempt at crafting the under age marriage law, knowing that with the mumus… “nothing go happen”

23. In the land of mumus, the rulers know they can always throw in the religious card, so Senator Yerima leads the child slavery onslaught with the religious chant.

24. While all this was going on, 79 year old OPC founder, Dr. Fasheun was, in his own description, “delivering” Mustapha to Kano.

25. Soon after, Gumsu Sani Abacha had the courage to rant on social media about her proud heritage… because with the mumus who his father savagely ruled over… nothing go happen.
26. Gumsu even called Soyinka who was a victim of her beloved dad’s misrule, “Mad empty Professor” … because in mumudom, “nothing go happen”.

27. Final scores… Jang 13, Amaechi 19, but in the land of mumus Mathematics has a different interpretation for 13 is greater than 19. Even the President of the mumus ratifies that.

28. By the way, both Governors Jang and Amaechi are from the same imploding political party.

29. Jang says he is old enough to be Amaechi’s father… a common escape route that is often quickly bought by the mumu populace. Old enough to be the President’s pawn and to upturn justice might be more like it. Only possible when you know for sure that your people are mumus… Nothing go happen.

30. The Governor is supposed to be the chief security officer of his State, but apparently in mumudom, his Police Commissioner is his boss.

31. The Governor’s security staff could be so easily withdrawn because nothing is institutionalized in a Nation of mumus. The loyalty of the security personnel is not based on the constitution but on personal or maternal affiliations. The mumus keep watching because “it does not concern me o”… “Big men and women are fighting”. Same way the injustice of the Nation’s attorney general’s assassination does not concern them.

32. Most reports in the Nigerian media kept referring to the self appointed Speaker as if he were truly the substantive Speaker. A mere use of “self-acclaimed” would have been logical, but they were already calling him the Speaker because… ignorance? inducement? resignation to the belief that the 5 vs 26 Assembly coup was already a done deal?

33. While all this drama unfolded, Nigeria, like the proverbial head-burying ostrich felt it had the moral right to insist on democratic processes in Egypt.

34. Sahara Reporters had screamed about the underhand conspiracy to proclaim Mustapha “not guilty”. Mumus simply went about their daily mumurity unperturbed because “it doesn’t concern them”. And when it happened as predicted… no problem. Mumus continue dem jolly as if nothing happened.

35. Meanwhile, Daniel and his political supporters carried their politics into the house of God at Rueben Abati’s mother’s funeral service… simply because there is no true reverence for God. Religion is a safe hiding cave. The mumus in the congregation would never protest such sacrilege because… “it is not strange” as the houses of God are now also political grounds. Obasanjo built one in Abeokuta. Jonathan got one built in Otuoke.

36. Meanwhile, some other mumus were again busy putting the Nation to international shame. In unprecedented match fixing fiascos, Police Machine beat Bubayaro 67-0 while Plateau United Feeders beat Akurba FC 79-0. Just in case you are confused, the game was soccer, not basketball.

37. The matches were to determine which one of the two tied teams would be promoted into… wait for this… just the 3rd division of the Nigerian soccer league. How many goals would they have to orchestrate when they want promotion to the 1st division?

38. Interesting to note that one of the teams involved in these shows of shame, the Police Machine, represents the Police Force. Now who would investigate this scandal?

39. Mumus involved in the conspiracy had to include players… team management… referees and other match officials… spectatorshuh That is quite a large mumu cooperative.

40. Since four teams were involved, multiply the number of conspirators by 4 (except match officials and spectators which should be multiplied by “only” 2). Hence, the scam was done in the open. It was a confident public show of shame. No… two confident simultaneous scams. No problem as corruption is everywhere.

41. Before the matches, Police Machine and Plateau United were level on points, goal difference and goals scored, and each was playing its final match which would determine which team would get elevated into the 3rd division league. Plateau United scored 72 of its 79 goals in the second half, thereby averaging more than one goal per minute. This would necessarily include the time needed to celebrate each goal, retrieve the ball, bring it back to the center, wait for the referee’s whistle before kicking off again…. after each goal. 72 times. Or did they just write the preferred figures as we typically do on election day?

42. Is it not curious that neither of the two losing teams could manage a single consolation goal? What else are we if not mumus?

43. Then there was the innocent man who was freed by the high court in Owerri after having been unjustly incarcerated for seven years, “awaiting trial”. No compensation… nobody held accountable for his ordeal. He insisted on being taken back to the prison as that was his only guaranty of a roof over his head and a daily meal. It was merely a “small thing” in the daily bizarre news as mumus went about their daily mumurity with their typical mentality of “e no concern me”.

44. Remember that this is mostly a snippet of the past two weeks or so. But there is more… 20 year old Chijioke Nwankor allegedly Molests a 9 year old pupil to death in Calabar. Reportedly in his own words, he asked her to bend down in the uncompleted building because it was too dirty to lie down as the place was being used as a public toilet. That is mumudom parlance for faeces shamelessly defecated all over the ground. Could the defecation be by aliens from outer space?

45. Well… thankfully, there is always a little ray of sunlight sneaking through the dark jungle. A Briton who was kidnapped by an armed gang shortly after arrival in Lagos, has been released."


Lagbaja is very right...but anyways,my own opinion is that the greatest mumuism of all is to claim not to be a mumu but to allow all the mumus to steal the show...!

Source: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/principles-of-mumuism.html

idnoble135: Depending on the circumstances. But not what your pics portray.

Idnoble135, maybe with just your sister then?....or a cousin?

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/Gov-Fashola-loses-dad.html

Father of Governor Babatunde Raji Fashola of Lagos State, Mr. Ademola Fashola just passed on after a brief illness. He had been flown to the United States of America earlier last year during the Lagos Doctors' Strike.

He was 75 years old and Governor Fashola is said to be on his way back home from Saudi Arabia. More details coming your way...

May his soul rest in perfect peace. Amen.

Welcome back from the weekend. I’m sure you must have witnessed or seen pictures of wedding ceremonies that held over the weekend….that of D’Banj’s sister and Cool FM’s Dotun is one of them.

I have questions for you today…have you ever witnessed wedding ceremonies where several couples are joined together in the same ceremony? Like…2…3….10….and even as much as 20? You like?

There are several brides and the event is colourful, less expensive and less time-consuming but haba, every bride wants to be the center of attraction on her wedding day. With 20 people getting married at the same day, that attention might just be lost.

Plus, might there be competition amongst couples to out-do one another in front of invited guests? Do you mind sharing your wedding day with any other or several other couples? Do let’s “branch” on this one again…!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/pros-cons-joint-wedding.html

The photographer sef na wa. Infact, all of them no blind. How come the photographer go know if I don comot for him front? [/quote]

...Since he uses his sense of touch, sound and smell to create photographs...if he is not touching you, I suppose he is "smelling" your absence...

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/annoying-things-in-church.html

Just like every other place, in church you meet several kinds of people who do not cease to amaze you with different stunts during the service. At times, you get disturbed or annoyed but what can you do? Here is a drop-down of the most annoying things people do in church:

*Chewing Gum in Church: And not just chewing gum but making silly noises with it. We know that most times, you might get sleepy during the service (especially if it is a vigil) but be discreet, mint sweets are better.

*Gisting with Friends: Some people have seriously complained about this. They are struggling to listen but the noise of the person next to them won't even allow them hear a thing. The most annoying part is that their gist is irrelevant...at other times, it evolves out of something the pastor has said and goes beyond proportion. Please, whatever it is...can't it wait till after the service?

Pinging and Constantly Updating Status: Funny enough, most people hide under the cloak of E-Bible, pretending to be using the bible application or jotting on a phone memo...hmnn...God dey ooo!!!

*Screaming " Yeah, Word! Preach It!! Yes, the Word can get really exciting but also remember that you're not the only one in church...hehe

*Snapping Pictures During Service and Uploading on Facebook, Twitter, etc: Just one question; when did church become a photo studio?

* Walking Around: Very distracting, even to the minister. If you are the kind of person that always has to go to the gents, please find a seat in a place where you won't draw too much attention, and except it is urgent, please please and please, try and sit still till the end of the service. This is no excuse for the rudeness of ushers though...

*Standing Up or Climbing a Chair to Watch a Drama: Dramas can get really exciting but obstructing the view of other people behind you is not accepted. Church is not cinema!

*Crying babies in Church: Yes, babies can get out of control but if you know your baby is the touchy type, it is more advisable for you to seat where you won't easily distract people....and please don't breastfeed in front of everybody, give yourself some closure.

Please, try to make this Sunday and every other one better for both you and everyone around you. Stay blessed!!!

Incumbent Zimababwean President who is 89 years old has been declared winner of Zimbabwean elections. He rode home to victory in what has been described as a "fraudulent election" with 61.09% of Wednesday’s vote, outstripping the 33.94% won by his opponent, Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai.

“We are going to go to court, we are going to go to the AU (African Union), we are going to go to the SADC (Southern African Development Community),” Tsvangirai angrily told a news conference in Harare.

While African observers have already broadly approved Wednesday’s peaceful vote, independent domestic monitors have described it as deeply flawed by registration problems that may have disenfranchised up to a million people.

It is such a shame that many African countries still cannot conduct an election that is widely accepted to be free and fair without any contentions. This does not come as a surprise, the supposed Giant is also caught in the dance of shame. Meanwhile, I only wonder what an 89-year-old man is still doing in active politics...

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/Mugabe-wins-zimbabwean-elections.html

We'd be looking next at amazing blind people in world history. Read on and be inspired!


(Marla Runyan) The First Blind Athlete in the Olympics

When Marla Runyan was 9 years old, she developed Stargardt's Disease, a form of macular degeneration that left her legally blind, but that never stopped her. From running paralympic races, she began to run able-bodied ones and in 1999 at the Pan- American Games,she won the 1,500-meter race. The next year, she placed eighth in the 1,500-meter in the 2000 Sydney Olympics, making her the first legally blind athlete to compete in the Olympics.

By 2001 she won her first of three consecutive 5000 metre National Championships. She also released her autobiography "No Finish Line: My Life As I See It". In 2002 she added the road 5K and 10K National Championships, and married her coach, Matt Lonergan.


*Wondering how she managed to run without intercepting the lane of others...wow!



Derek Rabelo

Derek was born with congenital glaucoma but that didn't stop the 20-year-old Brazilian from learning to surf when he was just three years old.

"With God, everything is possible," he says, and relying on four out of five senses, Rabelo is the protagonist of the upcoming documentary "Beyond Sight." If Derek's example doesn't put trivial complaints like high tides or sideshore winds into perspective, not a lot of other stories will.

*Even some of us that aren't blind have not learnt to swim...some are afraid of water still!




John Bramblitt (The Blind Painter)

John Bramblitt lost his vision in 2001 when he was 30 years old due to complications from epilepsy. At first, John says he lost hope and was in a deep depression, but then he found an outlet: painting. Since John can't see colors, he has developed a process whereby he paints by touch. According to the artist, the colors feel different to him: white is thick and black is a little runny, so when he needs gray, he mixes the two until the texture is right.

His art has been sold in over twenty countries and he has appeared internationally in print, TV, and radio. His work has received much recognition, including the "Most Inspirational Video of 2008" from YouTube and three Presidential Service Awards for his innovative art workshops.

*How could colours feel different to him...it amazes me!


Mark Anthony (The Blind NASCAR Driver)

On January 29, 2011, Mark Anthony Riccobono took the wheel of a Ford Escape and drove solo around the Daytona International Speedway, something that's not unusual except for one thing: Riccobono is blind.

Two technologies make it possible: DriveGrip, that consists of two gloves that send vibrations over the knuckles to tell the driver how much to turn the wheel, and SpeedStrip, a cushion down the back and legs of the driver which tell them how much to accelerate.

With only 10 percent of normal vision at age 5, Riccobono continued to lose vision throughout his life. But now, as part of a program from the National Federation of the Blind, he's working to demonstrate that blind people can adjust to society and drive safely with the aid of new technology.

It is real, it is dynamic research and Mark, though blind, is doing great things.


(Christine Hà) The Blind Chef

Christine Hà won the Masterchef TV show in 2004. She was diagnosed with neuromyelitis optica, gradually started losing her vision, and was almost completely blind by 2007.

In the 19 episodes of the competition third season of MasterChef, Christine Ha won seven times in both individual and team challenges, an additional three times in the top 3 group, but she also finished two times in the bottom 2/3 group. On September 10, 2012, Christine Ha was pronounced the winner of the competition, taking away $250,000, the title of MasterChef, the MasterChef trophy, and a cookbook deal.

*How does she manage to cook without any accidents in the kitchen, and with accuracy too?


(Pete Eckert) The Blind Photographer

Pete Eckert was trained in sculpture and industrial design. He had always been a visual person and planned to study architecture at Yale, but then he started to lose his sight because of a condition called retinitis pigmentosa. Amazingly enough, he embraced photography even more after becoming blind, shooting ethereal double exposures and vivid light paintings with his Mamiyaflex TLR.

He visualizes the image he wants to create in his mind and uses his senses of sound, touch, and memory to make a photograph. "I am a visual person. I just can't see," he says.

*There is a difference between having sight and being visual...hmnn...


(Christopher Downey) The Blind Architect

Christopher Downey is an architect, planner, and consultant who lost his sight in 2008 after a tumor wrapped around his optic nerve. How was it possible to keep working as an architect?

He works with a blind computer scientist who has devised a way to print online maps through a tactile printer. Today, he is dedicated to creating more helpful and enriching environments for the blind and visually impaired, and he also helps in crafting design processes that are more responsive to the needs of blind clients and end-users.

Wow!

Now, if you ask me, I know a couple of other blind Nigerians who do not cease to amaze me. Ayo Efunkoya, my friend who graduated as the best student from Mass Comm Dept, Unilag during his set is one of them. I also know of Tunde Osibote, a composer and a pianist whose dexterity with the piano will not cease to amaze you.

My submission...so far, whatever blind people have lost in sight, it seems, they always manage to make up for in other things!

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/08/7-amazing-blind-people.html

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/07/sallah-gift-kills-children.html

The first thing that caught my attention about this story was that the Special Assistant to the governor of Sokoto State on Press Affairs, Malam Abubakar Dangusau, told THISDAY that he was not aware of this incident. An incident that hapenned right at the residence of the Governor? I'd come back to him later.

Sad news reaching me holds that 3 children have died and 8 other people are critically injured due a stampede at the Sokoto State Governor's residence while he was distributing Sallah gift to the people.

As THISDAY reports, "The governor usually doles out brocade to youths and wrappers to women with an additional N1,000 to enable them sew the clothes before the Sallah festivities every year. He does this as a personal gesture to assist the indigent to enable them have a sense of belonging during the festival."

Reportedly, there had been three queues as teenagers waited to collect clothing items from the Governor but unfortunately, this could not be maintained despite the efforts of security operatives and a struggle ensued. The result was the suffocation of 3 small children and the hospitalization of 8 other teenagers who are currently receiving treatment at the Specialist hospital.

My point: CREATE JOBS for the people rather than distribute meager sums of money that cannot sustain them to "give them a sense of belonging". First, give them a means of livelihood and see if they'd kill themselves over cloths and 1,000 Naira. No...I don't mean the distribution of the gifts is wrong in itself, but this incident only goes to show the extent of poverty in Nigeria.

Now, to the Special Assistant that said he didn't know about the matter, he should definitely be ashamed of himself. If such an occurence happened right under his nose and he heard nothing about it, it simply means that he grossly lacks competence to fit into that position that he claims to hold.

My point again: What is wrong with press secretaries and public relations officers in Nigeria who desperately try to keep their jobs by telling the public a lie? It is very terrible!

Some of us had certain ideas about the Mrs. "who" that we have always wanted to be. Behind, Behind names always come to our heads but do we always end up marrying a guy with a Behind surname? Many considerations usually come into choosing a life partner but as funny as it is, there are also some seemingly trivial ones that might even have disqualified a prospective one in the first place- like the surname of the guy that just introduced himself.

"What's in a name?" you'd most likely ask. Take it or leave it, ladies do care about the surname of the guy they are going to get married to. Like I said earlier, it is quite a trivial one as it is not the surname that will keep the marriage. But you never can tell, it could be an added advantage.

Point is, some surnames are just "sooo not it" that a lady will consider twice before saying "yes", especially if the man will not modify the name for any reason. Talk about those names that start with "ESU" (devil), "SANGO"...etc. Hehehe!

So, let's "branch" on ladies...does his surname really matter when it comes to saying "YES"? What surnames will you rather not?

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/07/considerations-before-i-do.html

Recently, popular Nigerian blogger, Linda Ikeji, came out to clear the air on several tales that had pervaded the media about her personality. Perhaps, the part of the post that got to me most was where she said:

"Just four years ago, in 2009, while a CEO of a modeling and events company, I went to the ATM  to withdraw money from my account. I checked my balance and it was N800.
I wanted to withdraw N500 but the minimum balance you can leave in your account then (don't know if it's same now) was N500, so the ATM didn't give me the N500 I desperately needed. I tried to withdraw N300, but found out the minimum one can withdraw from an ATM is N500. I went home feeling down, wondering when my life would turn around. It has! Just four years later, I am a self-made millionaire".

Inspiring...

In a way, we all can resonate with those ATM experiences. So, she has cleared the air about her being a member of the illuminati, a fraudster, blackmailer, husband snatcher, runs girl and what have you (never knew they were so many of them names) or ever dating Jim Iyke and Ikechukwu the Rapper.

This gets me thinking....

Really...how appreciated are bloggers in Nigeria? A large percentage of Nigerians no longer buy newspapers because of free and instant updates by bloggers (everybody likes free things now) who strive to meet the needs of teeming Nigerians and who only get insults on their personalities on the comments thread- "bloggers are stupid, bloggers did this and bloggers did that".

A frustrated blogger, Tochukwu, once wrote: The main thing that pisses me off is that I'd pay for my internet data to be feeding you with fun updates, I put the latest album downloads, I put videos, I put things that I know you ungrateful bitches will like, not for any money, I make no money....". Then, he went on to ask; "Have you tried paying for internet data like 8 times in a week, paying your website hoster extra money cos your site crashed consecutively? All this money,  NA YOUR PAPA DEY GIVE US, ABI?"

Hehehe...forgive his use of strong words there but it's the truth!

No, I won't begin to sound subjective...blogging is one of the many endeavours in life where you have to face challenges- subscription, electricity and the input of ALL YOUR TIME. It can also be profitable at times but really, not all bloggers are making all the money you think that they are from your clicks. Many are just doing it out of passion or a sense of service. Everyone is entitled to opinions about any blogger but if you simply don't like a person's personality, why visit his territory  in the first place?

SOURCE: http://www.tutubranch.com/2013/07/why-pick-on-bloggers.html?m=1