greatgod2012:
Good day my fellow forumites. It's been a while opening thread on this forum. Happy sunday to us all.
This thread was borne out of a quarrel between a couple i tried to settle two days ago.
A colleague of mine approached me for advice on what is happening in her marriage, and at the end of narrating her ordeal, i pointed her fault to her as being the architech of her problems. I deduced that the bone of contention is that each time there is disagreement, he would ask her husband to choose between her and and his mother, and as it is expected, the man would choose his mother, and yawa go gas!
Please, my fellow women and wives (though some men are guilty of this too, but it's more rampant with women), let's stop this nonsense, let's stop asking silly questions, if there is an issue between you and your spouse, communicate with maturity, without raising voice, without setiments and without blackmail and most importantly, without silly questions such as, "then, you will have to choose between me and your mother" it's childish, silly, disrespectful and out of security and envy.
Let me tell us, no sane man will choose his wife over his mother, because the wife was not there when his mother conceived him, gave birth to him, breasfed him, trained him, have so many sleepless nighs because of him, sent him to school to become who he is now for you to see, admire and marry. No wife was there when the mother was washing the man's dirty clothes, even using bare hands to wash faeces with which he soiled himself, when the mother spent days in hospital when sick to make sure the man is in good health and shape. No wife was there when the mother wakes in the middle of the night to talk and advise his son on ways of life, on how to be a good child to her parents, a good person in the society, a good employee to his employer, a good employer to his employees, a good father to his children and a good husband to his wife. Now, it's the mother that the wife is now waging war against. Nooooo wayyyyyy.
Honestly, i don't know reason why there is usually rancour between DILs and MILs, if for anything, these old women deserves our respect, appreciation and to be made happy, at least for making these our husbands marriageable, abi, if they were not born, can we get married to them.
So, my fellow women, if you don't want to sadden yourself, stop asking your men to choose between you and his mother, because he would definately choose his mother. And for those who usually say, "then let him take his mother to bed", abeg, everything is not only about bed in marriage. For those who will say, "then let his mother prepare him food, remember, he has been eating his mother's food before meeting and marrying you. For those who will say, "then, let his mother bare him children", remember, the children are not only his, they're yours as well.
Let all DILs remember that they are also potential MILs and that whatever they sow as a DIL, they will reap them when they also become MIL.
Let us cultivate the habit of loving our MILs, appreciate them and stop unnecessary rivalry with them. Many of them are becoming old already, so, we need to remember that old age usually make someone to be eccentric. So, let' treat them as if they are our mother, which i believe they are. Atleast, someone who is old enough to be our spouse' mother is also fit to be our mother.
As for me, i have the most wonderful MIL in the whole world. I cherish her, adore her, love her greatly and i get the best of her, even my husband and his siblings do jealous of me.
Anytime there's a cause for all of us, me, hubby and mama, to be in a car, i open the front door for mama myself to sit, this singular act, i have been criticised of so many times, but, is it not for just one or few days, and i see that she usually love it each time i do that. She rains blessings on me as if there is no other day. I pamper her(but truth be said, she pampers me more).
See, my fellow women, this is a secret, if you want the best from your man, love his mother and you will never regret doing so.
God bless us all.
For those who will condemn this, i think i'm no longer a novice in marriage. This is my 10th year of marriage, and it's just like yesterday, we're just starting anyway, and everyday of our marriage has always been better than the previous day.
This also goes to the men who usually asks their wives to choose between them and their mothers.
P. S
DIL....daughter-in-law.
MIL....mother-in-law.
God bless us all. Nice thread but next time when you're about to introduce an acronym, usually, the self-made ones, first of all spell it out in full, then in bracket, write the acronym. Example: Daughter-in-law (DIL). In lieu of how you actually did it. Then you can start writing the acronym alone since you have already defined it. |
Romance › Re: Why Do Most Guys Dislike Fat Girls? by guyXander(m): 12:48am On Apr 06, 2015
