₦airaland Forum

Did this law factor in the following ?

What happens if the man truly doesn't want the child and the woman kept the child for herself? Because a woman has the rights to abort if she doesn't want the child and she will not be jailed.

A man should also be allowed to walk away from a child he doesn't want without a jail term.

He should be able to sign away his parental rights legally as part of the law

2. Also, is DNA testing part of the law so that the man can ask for a DNA test legally in cases when he is in doubt of parternity?

Redemption88:
Thank you soooooooo much for your input and the compliment🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️🙇🏿‍♂️

The answer to the question you asked me: "No, I haven't".

You are welcome. As I said earlier, you are thinking in the right direction.

You need to factor in how much she loves you to those good qualities of hers in your thinking and consideration because a bachelor medical doctor fits the profile of bachelors most women want to marry and they will pretend to love.

Also, remember that no one is perfect. You cannot see a 100pct perfect match to your want and situation. BUT you MUST understand the deficiency, the risks involved in the deficiency and determine if BOTH of you can overcome those risks in the marriage.

Some deficiency are not worth moving forward with the person, while some can be overcome with the right partner.

And to determine the good qualities and deficiency, you MUST do background checks, observe, test, read in-between the lines, etc to ensure you are getting the facts. DON'T rely solely on the woman's words or behaviors around you.

cutecommend:
It is possible to see the best spouse for you after you are Married, but you just have to love the one you are already married to and move on.

Not always true. It might be true only if you truly made a very terrible choice of a spouse.

Those people you see from afar as best might not the best when you go close to them, and when you marry them.

Redemption88:
Thanks for your input

Honestly I like your reasoning. I am not surprised since you are a doctor.

Background of anyone matters alot and most especially in marriages. It shapens all their reasoning and perspectives to life and challenges.

This is why most people from poor Background have poor people thinking, and vice versa for the rich.

Same way most ladies from single mothers end up becoming single mothers. Men from wife beating fathers end up beating their wives.

Back to this your case, the lady comes from a background of 4 people depending on her and they are already seeing you like their "savior". I see them seeing you as a savior as a red flag. I believe this is how your girlfriend is seeing you also. This is going to be the Genesis of your problems in the marriage if not well handled.

Let me ask, have you tested the love that girl has for you Is she really in love with you as a person or with you as a doctor savior for her family Remember that women are very good pretender and manipulator when they want to marry a man. You need to first test and confirm her love and loyalty to you in this situation.

You said "...The babe is perfect, 100% perfect, 100% God's babe, A VIRGIN...". You didn't mention how much the babe has been tested and confirmed to love you. She needs to still love you as a person in addition to those good qualities for you to enjoy a marriage with her.

Once you clear this, then you BOTH might be able to work together to overcome the challenges that her family background will bring to the marriage.

Fiscus105:
If you analysis is correct, the beautiful girl is supposed to go for guy with better income.

If the girl has another guy with better income, she will not be in that picture. You get it now?

Women stay with their highest offer or bidder.

Myrepublic:
.. can he allow his sister or daughter stay with a man in this condition?

God abeg o

But a girl can stay with her parents in this condition ba?

Fake story because if this is true, your parents need to take you to a spiritualist or to a doctor to examine your head.

Zelensky is using his country men to do play stupid games.

An award of the most stupid president of our time should be given to him.

Dtruthspeaker:
Yes.
Their men and their tradition made them like that. There is so much pain being an Ibo woman

Wow! I have been observing this. It's well with them.

Even here in Nairaland, it's same thing.

To be clear, the woman in this story was dating other men after divorcing her husband, but she was dating married men, Alhajis with multiple wives.

Do you think that's her choice of men The answer is obviously a NO. But that's what she got in the dating market being a divorcee with multiple kids.

That's the reality in life. It's not new and it will not end with her.

Towma:
This propaganda of trying to force women to forgive cheating husbands is nothing but pure evi.

Nobody forces or can force any woman to marry or stay in a marriage with this propaganda.

There's propaganda and there is reality. Anyone that's not stupid should be able to see reality.

This is one of them when you look around you. Divorced women with multiple children find it hard to date single men.

You can be emotional as you want to, but that doesn't change the reality.

It's same way women were using emotions to say men have same biological clock like women in the other thread. Reality in our lifes and surrounding says otherwise.

Hahahaha. Another table to be shaken. Modern wannabe feminists only want equality where it is convenient and beneficial to them.

This is why we don't see women fighting for equality in hard labor jobs like Mason, Car Mechanics, Miners, War Front soldiers, etc.

In the US for example, there's a law called "military draft" for only men to be sent to wars, modern feminists all over the US never fight that law to be equitable.

Fountainofyouth:
So how does that affect you people's existence if she faces similar hurdle? Why does her life after divorce matter to y'all? Even if she remains single or she sleeps with whoever it is none of your business, keep your tales by moonlight stories of gaslighting and manipulation to yourselves, and accept the fact that women will continue to divorce their cheat of a husband because THEY CAN, very simple common sense.

I have sisters. So I will advise them accordingly if they face that situation. Yes, the decision is theirs but I will tell them the truth which is this reality.

GloriousGbola:
another made up story

you think in this decade i need to go to my ex house to know he/she is married? when we have facebook, instagram whatsapp status?

and you want to give us the bs story of a kind step mother

in this nigeria??

there is only one real moreal to your made up story - and that is that a woman should ensure she is not financially dependent on her husband

as for the husband - if he actually now has four children - he is not smart at all in this decade. na the first two pikins go suffer am pass

The story might be made up but it's also a very common reality.

And the main moral of the story is that divorced women with children find it difficult to get another single man/ never married men to date or remarry them.

That doesn't mean a woman should not divorce her husband for whatever reasons that suit her. It just means that she has a very high chance of facing similar hurdle.

The story is a very common scenario for majority of women that divorced their husbands with children just because of cheating.

Though they hide it but unfortunately it's what it's.

Is this why majority of Nigerian toxic feminists are Igbo ladies??

I am just asking based on my observations.

I wanted to call the story a lie until I saw "his American wife".

She is just a Maga to the young man.

Angiewhite:
Nope, It’s the other way round, I just don’t want to dwell on that so it doesn’t seem I’m boastful, o just want to focus on the matter on hand, why will a guy in a relationship set up his girlfriend for theft,that’s all.

The guy wanted to get rid of you. He had insulted you, called you another woman's name and probably did other things to get you out but you refused to get the message. That's why he didn't apologize to you on this.

Has he called you since the incident last week?

pocohantas:
Yes. Thankfully you can keep your more stupid congrats and well wishes to yourself. It made my skin crawl. Thanks

I am not surprised. A snake will always be a snake. You will always reveal who you really are anytime you are comfortable.

jasent:
Bro,I non understand your comment o

He is trying to wake you up. A broke girl that didn't really like you. Just came to give you opueh when she needed someone to rent house for her and her sister.

Just know that red flags are all over that your narration.

Spend only what you can afford to lose on that girl. Otherwise, you might regret it later.

pocohantas:
What did you do to her, Sir?

You were given an 18yo beautiful virgin and you turned her into a drug addict.

Like Ned, like Tuface. Only two of you can tell us what you did to your wives.

I bet you will use this drug abuse accusation to have full custody of the kids. Typical!

You Don start again with all these your stupid feminism comments even when it doesn't make sense.

Kobojunkie:
. Getting a master's degree is levelling up one's credentials.

2. Having absolute control over her finances is not really the issue here. The issue is more about how much she makes compared to how much she is responsible for. If she makes minimum wage, she may not be able to meet so many of her bills and also have enough left over to handle her leveling up needs, etc.

I guess I should ask what exactly you intend to get from this woman, who made it clear that she is unable to pay the $900 at this point. Why was your main intention behind creating this thread?

She says she does not have it and you two are not looking to go your separate ways, so what exactly do you want to gain from us?

The issue in that marriage is deeper than 900 dollars. There is a bigger issue in that marriage beyond the 900, the house rent etc. If they don't retrace very quickly, if not already too late, they will soon be involving authorities and the courts.

yottravels:
The husband came in on F1 visa. Filed for the wife and son to come in on F2 visa. The husband took student loan to complete school. After graduation, the husband also spent a lot of money to get approved for the employment based green card petition and made the wife and son beneficiaries. They filed for PR when their priority date became current. The husband gathered money including credit cards to file the application (about $4000) while the wife promised to pay the $900 so that some of the credit cards could be paid

Very familiar story. Why did the husband continue to include her on the EB petition and adjustment of Status since the wife had started showing these signs of non supporting wife?

The signs would have been there since Nigeria but the moment she started showing that sign in the US, the husband is supposed not to include her in green card application.

The matter now is that the woman is just waiting for that green card to come out to let all hell lose on the man

What most of these women don't realize is that America is built for two family incomes, most especially with children.

When she eventually get out of that marriage, she will still pay all those bills by herself or eventually share them with another man that will never marry her.

That's if she will not end up with a married man outside as many of them do.

yottravels:
Thanks for your response. For now, I will prefer to be gender neutral in order to avoid skewed opinions. I will appreciate independent opinions on the personalities of the couple

I am seeing what is very common with Nigerian made marriages taken to America. Same story everywhere with these marriages.

Nigerian women have mentality that their husbands should treat them like his "adopted daughter" when he is spending on them and the family but he should respect and treat them as a "queen" they are.

When they get to America, they will quickly take the the American culture of man and woman are equal in marriage where it suits them but they still want the man to continue to shoulder all their financial responsibilities alone. If the man cannot or he refuses to shoulder all financial responsibilities like he did in Nigeria, they will start withholding affection and even brake up the marriage.

Even when they are working in America, many of them still have the mentality of "my money is my money and his money is our money".

In this case though, the woman here is trying to support with financial responsibilities but there are tensions in the marriage already. Most likely due to change in financial dynamics in the family as the man cannot shoulder all financial responsibilities as he did in Nigeria.

FaAbData:
Who noticed it's the man in all the stores doing the risk and sacrifices?

For Evey successful story are read above they're 5 unsuccessful- that the sacrifices weren't appreciated or reciprocated

We saw that but still dey look whether they will post stories of women doing the sacrifice for love and marriage.

Harddiskng:
Why are these stories about the man solving a major problem in the woman’s life, then her “falling in love” based on that

I wanted to read i love him with all my heart just because i do

😀😀😀😀😀 let's still be observing my guy. Maybe the real love story without "anything" attached from the man will be posted.

pocohantas:
Can you show any comment of me reasoning otherwise on a similar topic? Keep your congratulations. I will be waiting...

I be old timer here. No need to open all those old wounds. I wish you all the best.

pocohantas:
Very important!!
I keep praying for the wisdom to please Mine.
He has his occasional moments, who doesn't?
But in all, he is a great guy and I am super proud of him.




There should be.
The story cannot end like that.
Please go check again. 😂

Wow! Is this same Poco of those days

So,marriage can make you reason like this??

I have been observing your comments lately and I knew something had changed.

Congratulations!!! I am happy for you.