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Every woman wants a rich man. Every man wants a virgin.

Let's not lie about it.

Women have always wanted security. They want a man with money, status, ambition, a provider. No one shames them for that. It's called "having standards." It's called "knowing your worth."

Men have always wanted purity. They want a woman with a clean past, low body count, untouched, loyal to only him. That is our standard.

And look at the difference:

A broke man today can become rich tomorrow. He can work, hustle, build a business, hit the gym, level up. A man's value is built. He can change his financial status with discipline.

But a woman with a high body count, who has been passed around, who has given herself to many men - she can never become pure again. You can't reverse that. You can't un-do what has been done. Purity, once lost, is lost forever.

That's why modern women fight male standards so hard. They call it insecure, toxic, misogynistic, controlling.

It's not. It's because they can't meet it.

They can demand a rich man, because even a broke woman can get a rich man if she is beautiful and pure. But a promiscuous woman cannot get a high-value pure man, no matter how much makeup she wears or how much she pretends to be empowered.

Men built their standard to be achievable. Women lost the ability to achieve ours, and now they want to shame us for having it.

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😂 SOME RECRUITERS NEED TO BE ARRESTED BY THE ASSOCIATION OF HUMAN CONSCIENCE! 😭🤣

So, a recruiter reached out to me recently and said they wanted us to advertise a job vacancy.

Me: Okay, no problem. Kindly send the job description, location, requirements and salary.

Recruiter: We need a graduate with 2–3 years of experience.

Me: Okay, sounds good. Salary?

Recruiter ₦50,000–₦60,000 monthly.

😭😭😭

I had to check my phone battery because I thought my phone was malfunctioning.

EXCUSE ME, SIR? FIFTY THOUSAND NAIRA? FOR A GRADUATE? WITH EXPERIENCE? 😭

Oga, are you recruiting an employee or looking for someone to sponsor your business with their suffering? 😭🤣

Transport fare alone will finish that salary before the employee finishes saying "Good morning, sir."

And you people will still write:

✅ Must be hardworking
✅ Must be passionate
✅ Must be able to work under pressure
✅ Must be willing to go the extra mile
✅ Must have excellent communication skills

EXTRA MILE WITH WHICH TRANSPORT MONEY, PLEASE? 😭😭

The funniest part is when they add " _We are looking for someone who is not motivated by money_ ."

Ahhhh! So what should motivate the person? The office ceiling fan? The company's vision and mission statement? 😭🤣 Oh please 🥺

Please, dear recruiters and employers, DON'T YOU PEOPLE HAVE CONSCIENCE? 😭

I understand that businesses are struggling, but employees are also human beings. They eat, pay rent, transport themselves and have responsibilities.

If your business can only afford ₦50k–₦60k, please be realistic about the responsibilities and experience you're demanding.

You cannot be looking for a graduate, accountant, receptionist, social media manager, cleaner, customer service representative and occasional prayer warrior ALL IN ONE PERSON FOR ₦50K! 😭🤣

At that point, you're not recruiting staff.

YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A CO-FOUNDER WHO DOESN'T KNOW THEY OWN SHARES IN THE COMPANY! 😂😂😂

Please, let's fear God small. Even suffering has a salary expectation. 🤝😭

Recruiters in the house, come and defend yourselves. I promise we won't beat anybody. 😂🏃‍♀️

Good night 💤

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Every day, I increasingly understand that some Nigerians do not have a problem with you until they feel you're bigger than them. They will love you and be kind to you until they get the impression that you're either on the same level as them or even bigger than they are.

When we acquired the property for the Moppet Foods factory, the very first day we went there after the purchase to begin our assessment was on a Saturday. The neighbours, mostly landlords and a few old tenants, came to welcome us.
They were so nice. They even brought wine and cookies to celebrate with us. They talked to us about the neighbourhood and everything else. YM and I were so excited. We thought, "Wow, what a lovely neighbourhood we've moved into."

The property we bought sat on a large expanse of land, but the only structure on it was a spacious four-bedroom bungalow. The previous owner had lived in that bungalow. In fact, on that entire street, our compound had the least impressive structure. Every other house had storey buildings, duplexes, or tall blocks of flats. Ours was just a low bungalow tucked inside a large compound.

So whenever the landlords in those compounds saw us, they greeted us almost like younger siblings, with a tone that seemed to say, "Oh, this is your first house. You'll grow to be like us someday." That's what I have come to understand now. They probably thought we were simply moving in with our family to live there.

As we began setting up the place, the first shock came when we installed our own transformer.
Please note, we didn't install a transformer because we could or because we wanted to show off. At our previous location, we regularly overloaded the street transformer. There were times we'd switch on certain equipment and the entire street would lose power. We knew this, which was why we often ended up being the ones responsible for repairing the transformer whenever it developed faults.

Our power load was going to double in the new facility, so we knew whatever transformer the street already had would not be able to carry our operations. That was why we got our own.
After it was installed, one of the landlords exclaimed, "Ah! I thought you people were small people. We were wrong."

I laughed and replied, "Ah, we are small people o! I feel like sending you my Opay account sef. This transformer is just so we can survive and do what we came here to do."
Then the factory began operations. We deliberately set out to employ as many people from the neighbourhood as possible. It got to the point where I'd be driving through the area and complete strangers whose relatives worked with us would greet me warmly and show me extra kindness.

Then we moved in the major equipment. After that, we started constructing warehouse spaces on the empty portions of the land. Every move we made revealed that we weren't quite the small young couple they had initially assumed we were.
Suddenly, everything changed.

I'd drive by and wave at the man
standing on his balcony, and he'd immediately run inside, pretending not to see me. He started exhibiting open hostility. If there was a small street levy or contribution, he wouldn't even inform us. Instead, he would start frustrating my staff.
When my staff first reported it, I said, "Oh, don't worry. I know him. I'll just call him."
I called him.

"Good morning, sir," was all I said before he started shouting.
"If you think because you have money you can do XYZ..."
I was shocked.
I replied, "Sir, money ke? I don't have money. Please, let's talk about this like adults so we can find a solution. Did my staff do anything wrong?"
I later went to his house to talk to him, but he said he couldn't see me and that I should leave.
The day he locked my staff out of the street simply because of a security levy he had never communicated to us beforehand, my lawyer became furious.

He said, "No. He has overstepped his boundaries. He has absolutely no right to deny employees access to their workplace. He's nothing more than a landlord on the street. Why should he wield such authority?"
My lawyer wanted to drag him to court immediately.
I said, "No. Let's not go that far. I'm sure he'll calm down. I'll try to settle it amicably."
So I carried my pregnant self to his house. He stood on the balcony and told me to remain outside the gate and say whatever I wanted to say because he wasn't going to let me into the compound.

At that point, I simply left and said to myself, "He'll be alright or not."
Then guess what happened next?
He turned out to be the very person who invited the fake local government official who came to extort us.

Now, I have completely handed the matter over to our lawyers. Based on the confession of the individual arrested yesterday, they can teach him whatever lesson the law sees fit.

Sometimes, people don't dislike you because you've offended them. They dislike you because the version of you they created in their minds no longer matches reality.

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Time is one of the greatest blessings Allah has given us, yet it is also one of the easiest things to waste.

Every day, we are given the same 24 hours.

The difference lies in how we use them.

Allah ﷻ swears by time and says:
> “By time, indeed mankind is in loss.”

[Sūrah al-ʿAṣr 103:1–2]

These are not words to be passed over lightly.

Allah ﷻ swears by time because of its tremendous importance. Every moment that passes is a part of our life that will never return.

The Prophet ﷺ also warned us about how easily this blessing is lost. He said:
> “There are two blessings that many people are deceived into losing: health and free time.”

[Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6412]

Free time is therefore not simply an empty space between responsibilities. It is a blessing that can either become a means of great reward or a source of great loss.

And this is why managing our time is not merely about productivity.

It is about living intentionally.

It is about knowing what deserves our attention, what deserves to be prioritised, and what is simply stealing hours from our lives.

Al-Hasan al-Basrī رحمه الله beautifully said:
> “O son of Ādam! You are nothing but a number of days. Whenever a day passes, a part of you has gone.”

[Reported in works of Islamic admonition]

Think about that.
We often say, “I lost an hour.”

But in reality, we did not merely lose an hour.
We lost a portion of our life.

> Ibn al-Qayyim رحمه الله said that aperson's time is, in reality, his life, and that whatever portion of his time is spent for Allah and with Allah's help is truly part of his life.

This changes the way we should look at our daily schedule.

The question is not simply:
“How can I get more things done?”

Rather:
“How can I make the time Allah has given me count?”

Our time should have room for what benefits us in this life and the next: worship, seeking beneficial knowledge, fulfilling responsibilities, serving our families, working, resting when needed, and doing other beneficial things.

Shaykh ʿAbd al-ʿAzīz ibn Bāz رحمه الله said:

> “Time is precious, more precious than gold, so it should be occupied with what benefits.”

He then mentioned beneficial pursuits such as reading the Qur’an, remembering Allah, attending gatherings of knowledge, visiting the sick, and other good deeds.

This does not mean that every minute must be filled with activity.

Rest has its place.

Family has its place.

Permissible recreation has its place.

But heedlessness should not become the default use of our time.

The goal is not to become busy.

The goal is to become intentional.

Start with what you can control.

Plan your day.

Set priorities.

Reduce distractions.

Give each responsibility its proper time.

And most importantly, make use of the time you have today.

Because tomorrow's time has not yet been promised to you.

🌱 Your time is your life.

The hours you spend today are shaping the person you will become tomorrow.

So before you ask:
“How can I fit everything into my day?”

Ask yourself:
“What deserves the best of my time?”

And perhaps even more importantly:
“If I continue spending my time this way, where will it take me?”

This is where we begin.

TDOW SERIES

*The Devoutly Obedient Women™*

_References:_
_• Qur’an 103:1–2_
_• Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6412_
_• Tafsīr al-Saʿdī, Sūrah al-ʿAṣr_
_• Al-Jawāb al-Kāfī — Ibn al-Qayyim رحمه الله_
_• Sayings of al-Ḥasan al-Baṣrī رحمه الله_
_• Shaykh ʿAbd al-ʿAzīz ibn Bāz رحمه الله “How Can a Muslim Occupy His Time?”_

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Everything we do in life is shaped by our definition of success. Our day to day decisions, knowingly or unknowingly, are determined by what we each believe success to be.

For most of us, it is measured by one or more of three from; material wealth, fame and status. We thus find that everything from our day to day decisions all the way up to our major life decisions are measured and judged against these criteria. We need look no further than our Muslim youth to see this in effect; to see them either falling into an intense pursuit of the dunya, seeking its treasures, or finding them obsessing over celebrities, fame and status, whether through the online sphere, or gang culture and the like.

As Muslims, it is imperative that we regularly refresh our understanding of success. It is this understanding that will determine our short-term and long-term goals, the overall direction we take in life and the difference between Jannah and Jahannum for us .

Dear reader, understanding the reality of success is arguably the most important factor in us attaining Jannah and avoiding the Hellfire. This therefore begs the question, what is real success?

Allāh, the Lord of the heavens and the earth and our Creator, repeatedly tells us what real success is in the Qur’ān. He tells us:

*“ And whosoever obeys Allāh and His Messenger (Muḥammad (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam)) will be admitted to Gardens under which rivers flow (in Paradise), to abide therein, and that will be the great success.* ”[Quran 48:17]

In another verse,

*“ Allāh has promised the believers — men and women, Gardens under which rivers flow to dwell therein forever, and beautiful mansions in Gardens of ‘Adn (Eden Paradise). But the greatest bliss is the Good Pleasure of Allāh. That is the supreme success.”* [Quran 9:72]

And in one more verse, out of many:

“ *Who is averted from (such a torment) on that Day, (Allāh) has surely been Merciful to him. And that would be the obvious success.”* [Quran 6:16]

Allāh Ta’ala tells us time and time again that real, tangible, true success lies in:

➡️Attaining Paradise

➡️The pleasure of Allāh

➡️Avoiding the fire of Hell punishment from Allāh

By this logic, everything leading to the attainment of Paradise and the pleasure of Allāh Ta’ala is itself a success and everything leading to the Hellfire and the wrath of Allāh Ta’ala is a failure.

With this understanding, we should naturally look for steps to achieve true success, some of which are considered below.

*1. Hereafter centricity*
Make the Hereafter the core focus of your life. Set your eyes on the real goal, the lofty heights of Jannah; al-Firdaus al A’la. Seek the ultimate pleasure – gazing upon Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā) and prioritise your goals in line with this. For setting our eyes upon the Hereafter and pursuing it wholeheartedly is that which will reap success in this life and the next.

On the authority of Zaid b. Thābit (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu): The Messenger of Allāh (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said,

“ *Whoever makes the world his most important matter, Allāh will confound his affairs and make poverty appear before his eyes and he will not get anything from the world except what has been decreed for him. Whoever makes the Hereafter his most important matter, Allāh will settle his affairs and make him content in his heart and the world will come to him although he does not want it.* ”[Sunan Ibn Majah]

As part of this, we must remember that we attain reward according to intention and that even mundane acts can earn reward if the intention is to please Allāh Ta’ala alone. By having a Hereafter-centric view in our daily lives and remembering Allāh Ta’ala in all actions, success can be attained through even the seemingly insignificant aspects of life.

*2. Amassing good deeds*
Allāh Ta’ala tells us many times in the Qur’ān that those who both have belief and do good deeds will inherit Jannah. Simply saying I believe is not sufficient, rather that belief in the heart necessitates action of the limbs.

After all, we will all stand before Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā) with nothing except our good deeds; this is the currency of the Hereafter and it is these good deeds which will be weighed on the scales against our bad deeds. And our objective in this life is to amass as many good deeds as possible and to avoid sinning as much as possible. This is what will allow us to earn Allāh’s mercy and avoid His anger, inshāAllāh. This is our ticket to success in this life and Jannah in the next.

Good deeds can be gained through acts of personal worship but also through worldly affairs; again it comes back to intention. A balanced approach should be taken – as Muslims, we do not neglect attaining success in this life, but we do it for a greater purpose. Thus we seek higher salaries in order to give more in charity, or climb the career ladder in order to increase our sphere of influence to spread divine values, and so on.

Consequences of pursuing incorrect “success”
Imagine you had an exam for which you revised day after day, night after night, week after week. Imagine after having revised for so long you enter the examination hall only then to realise that you had revised for the wrong exam. How regretful would you be?

This is over a small exam in the dunya.

Now imagine you have worked your whole, entire life and on Yawm al Qiyāma you realised you had picked up the wrong mark scheme. Your existence was wasted working towards the wrong goal. Can words describe how regretful you would be?

As Muslims, we must truly understand the definition of success, because everything we work towards in life is determined thereafter. Most importantly, we must not waste our lives working solely for worldly benefit. If we work for the Hereafter, we are certain to find that not only are our worldly needs taken care of but also our Hereafter.

We ask Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā) to allow us to understand true success and to work tirelessly to achieve it, ameen.

_________________________
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(Sahih Muslim 1893)

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Money can buy a lot of things, but not the things that make life truly valuable.

You can buy a comfortable bed, but you can’t buy a peaceful mind.

You can buy medicine, but you can’t always buy good health.

You can buy a house, but you can’t buy a loving family to fill it.

You can buy attention, but you can’t buy genuine friendship.

You can buy expensive clothes and watches, but you can’t buy true respect.

You can spend money to save time, but you can’t purchase more years of life.

And perhaps most importantly, money can buy comfort, but inner peace has to be built.

That’s why becoming financially successful should never be the only goal.

Build your wealth, absolutely.

But while you’re building it, don’t sacrifice your health, relationships, character, or peace of mind.

Because there’s a strange irony in life:

We often spend our health trying to make money, and then spend our money trying to get our health back.

So earn well. Save wisely. Invest intelligently.

But don’t forget to actually live.

At the end of the day, the richest life isn’t necessarily the one with the most money.

It’s the one where you have good health, people you love, peace in your mind, time to enjoy your life, and a clear conscience.

Spend wisely, but live wisely too.
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Share this post with a friend.
Follow Mindset Reading for more content.

*#financialfreedom #selfimprovement*

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“Honestly, I like drinking alcohol. When I was living in Egypt, I used to travel all over the country just to find someone who sold alcohol. And even if I found someone, I would find the man selling it sitting in a very cramped place, looking left and right, afraid that the government might see him—or afraid that I might be working for the government.

He would ask me, ‘Where are you from? What’s your name?’ He was anxious, terrified, and extremely cautious.

When I left Egypt and traveled to Europe, the first thing I did was unbutton my shirt and make my cross clearly visible. I thought Christians were highly respected there and that people would welcome me. But I found that Europeans had no particular interest in the cross or in Christianity at all. I realized that this was an idea I had been raised with since childhood, and that it simply wasn’t true.

The country was secular, and many of those who are considered Christians there turned out to be atheists or people who knew very little about religion.

I found alcohol being sold in stores just like water. I saw millions of children who didn’t know who their fathers or mothers were. I saw mixed-gender relationships and everything being available.

I saw young men dating women and having children together, then getting married 20 years later. Cristiano Ronaldo is a prime example.

And if that young man died in an accident, the children he had fathered might end up in foster care. The woman would then find someone else, start a relationship with him, and perhaps marry him 20 years later.

I saw women marrying women and men marrying men. I saw mothers reaching the age of 70 and being placed in nursing homes, while their own son would take them there, visit them once a month or once a year—or perhaps never visit them at all.

I saw unbelievable things—things that were, in my view, all forbidden and immoral.

So I swear to God, I am saying this as a matter of truth, not because I want to gain the sympathy of Muslims. Muslims really have preserved Egypt and protected their women and families. And not just Egypt—all the Arab countries.

I genuinely respect this Islamic creed. These are people who have honor, principles, and a strong sense of responsibility.

And I, as a Christian who was raised in the East, say this openly and explicitly: Islam is not merely a religion. Islam is the last line of defense protecting morality in the entire world.

Muslims regard the prohibition of what is forbidden as absolute. Their sense of protective jealousy is not backwardness; it is a form of protecting the home and family honor. A Muslim man would sacrifice his own life rather than allow his mother, sister, or wife to be humiliated.

That is what keeps society cohesive and firmly grounded.

If the West had the same restraints, masculinity, honor, and chivalry that Islamic law instills in Muslims, it would not have reached the swamp and the absurdities that I witnessed with my own eyes.

And I have also seen European Muslim men and women who remain deeply committed to their religion, morality, principles, beliefs, and values despite all the temptations surrounding them.”

1. The trader who removes 2 bowls of rice from the bag, repackages, and sells as a 'full' bag is complaining about the wickedness in Nigeria.

2. The lecturer who insists on sex for a young girl to pass is complaining about the rot in Nigeria.

3. The Pastor who pays his driver 15K in Lagos or Abuja while his son schools in the USA is complaining about the hopelessness in Nigeria.

4. The Mallam (Local Islamic school teachers) who send other people's children to go and beg in the name of Almajiri and bring the money to him on oath so that he will take care of his family while the Almajiri's are looking like slaves is complaining that Nigerian leaders don't know God.

5. The civil servant who comes to work once a week and shows up at the end of the month to receive full salary and kickbacks is complaining about politicians who do nothing.

6. The student who spends the whole weekend at the party after party only to start posting Instagram pictures on Monday is complaining that Nigeria is stealing his/her dreams.

7. The "VIP driver" who can't join a simple queue but keeps overlapping in and out of traffic to shunt is complaining about disorderliness in Nigeria.

8. Doctors in public and teaching hospitals on the government payroll who abandon patients on the floor but are thriving in their private hospitals are complaining that Nigeria is hopeless.

9. The officer who sees 'roger' as his/her birthright and keeps on complaining that our leaders are evil and therefore Nigeria is doomed.

10. The members who diverts the money and property of his/her organisation for personal use is complaining about bad leadership in Nigeria.

11. Until we realize that the value of Nigeria today is the average of our values, we will keep fooling ourselves.

12. You claim to be obidient/atikulated/Bolanized, yet you cheat, defraud or tell lies against your neighbour.

We are all architects of our social and economic development woes.

Stop the blame game. CHANGE begins with YOU.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Our attitudes and unpatriotic behaviours should stop.

BE the CHANGE you want to SEE!

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