₦airaland Forum

sholay2011:
Thanks for your feedback. Means a lot.

And trust me, I knew that would be the immediate reaction seeing Lara on the scene but she is there for a different thing or things over the course of the story.

Attached is an updated version. Your feedback will be appreciated. Thanks.

Good conflicts. I never saw Lara coming, an interesting character she's turning out to be.

On the other hand I felt the script dragged a bit. Some filler scenes. Though it's left in the hands of a good director to do justice to it. But in whole it's turning out good.

Avoid too much sugar and stop madturbation

sholay2011:
Hello everyone. I just started penning a feature length film script and decided to share the first few pages here for review, critique and feedback from fellow scriptwriters, lovers of cinema and other people involved in various aspects of film making.

It is just a 13-page script so far. Your comments will be welcome. Please, find the attached pdf document. Thanks.

@prof800, @villageboi, @briareos, @speedyboi, @semid4lyfe @tonyayo, @morsadh, @lynx200, @ignatio, @cnario, @chromatic @thesoj.

Hi, hope I'm not late on this. Just seeing it this morning.
What I've read so far is cool. I like the back theme of how machines are taking over from men and how it's linked to the story so far.

Interested to know what follows up and I'm hoping Kunle doesn't leave Kemi for Lara

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

My sister run O!

@Op pls finish your story. Leave all this over sabi people.

Zombiekiller010:
Take her back, be using her to pass time steady steady, don't give her what you can't afford to loose, don't take her serious and don't complain on anything she is doing wrongly,
Raise another relationship with a lady and make sure that relationship end up in marriage, dump you ex few weeks to when you're about to settle down , break up with her .Moving into marriage with a loyal lady is how you can pay her back, she will be heartbroken while you laugh last

So you didn't read that Oloni thread on Twitter.

If you're not on the wrong believe me one day he will come begging and with an explanation for what he did. It may be too late for him then.
For the meantime vibe positively, true love will find you.

Topmaike007:
funny enough amazon prime video still capture my heart than netflix, but still don't know why our people don't contact them to drop movie there

It won't get across to many Nigerians. Netflix has a high number of Nigerian subscribers. It's best you get your film there.

Some are codely coming back for Christmas.

Government of the cattle by the cattle and for the cattle.

The pastor get leg sha. But this is pure intimidation.

mofedamijo:
Something needs to be done, statistics shows that its common amongst West African athletes, i hope he has saved for retirement, and this is a lesson to other athletes and artist/musicians, save now, cause no one knows tomorrow.

If he had played enough to save much.

Respect55:
Chelsea fans are in sifia pains

No we're not. We're happy for him for he has served is well

I hardly open links like this. But I was feeling good and generous today so I opened this only to watch a pointless video. total waste of my 55 secs and data.

jhalaljnr:
And nobody is condemning the marriage. Nobody is saying anything. Had it being that the couples are from the north, we would surely start to hear different sort of insults and condemnation.

Because the North is more of a curse to us than a blessing.

Kaycee7:
Shey after downloading the movie for free, you'll still come and criticize our movie industry for not growing.

Don't mind him.

Had an aunt. Very beautiful. Parents and siblings were against her marrying the man. Dude was a hemp smoking low life. But it was too late she was already pregnant and the marriage had to go on. Some years down it got all messy. She later left the man's house to my grandma's house to have some break. By then her health was failing. We lost her. She was sad in the marriage.

Nice rides

Porn

They for allow this girl marry nah.

Mynd44:
Winner winner chicken dinner!

What's your id?

Does Instagram pay?

mhizminna:
You see those low budget, Aba movies? They are the real deal! cos only few people goes to the cinema and a larger population depend on this 'low budget' Aba movies even pirated copies of this cinema movies are selling more than the originals.

Truth is dude is a yahoo boy disguising as an actor. We know who the high earning actors are.
People shouldn't be misled thinking he made money from acting.

dominique:
She allowed it. He kept cheating on her and treating her like dirt and she kept going back to him. He dumped her to start a high profiled relationship with J.Lo when their second son was still a baby. After the J.Lo relationship ended, she went back to him and had a set of twins. Even then, he was cheating on her with Cassie and a bunch of younger models. I honestly don't understand how women allow men to walk all over them because of money. It has to be low self-esteem.

Still baffles me how an adult can succumb to flu despite their advanced health care over there. Hope the death is investigated properly

Relationships in the west are quite complicated.

Heard it's a case of flu and pneumonia. Very deadly.

dominique:
Why is Usher grinning at a funeral like that, is he happy she's dead?

The way he's all dressed up you will know he came for the cams.

Because all they know is theory.

It's very risky to record sensitive stuffs like sextapes in this era of high tech phones, hacking and cloud storage. Leak may not come from either parties.

eleojo23:
...without movies.

Nah... this one has featured in many films unlike the rest.