₦airaland Forum

paBuhari:
My son how work? I hope you are voting for Jonathan?

paBuhari:
My son, Pls don't vote me. Am going back to my village in daura.

paBuhari:
The truth is APC doesn't believe in Change. They're using me to grap power at all cost. That's why am heading back to daura come April. I taya for kwampan.

Demdem:
Fool, again i ask........what is odili mobilizing? What is ur corrupt principality currently bringing to the table.

Demdem:
Jonah-daft is a curse to the Nigerian nation

rokiatu:
If you was dumb enough to have unprotected sex when you are not ready for a child yet then your stupidity is beyond measure. My only advice is to stop wasting time thinking so much and go look for any kind of work for that matter even if you have to clean shoes. You are going to be a father congrats in advance. When you was hitting it raw and enjoying yourself, you didn't think about this day abi? When you was c..umming in her, you had no idea there was a thing call,pregnancy right? And the morning after you and your dumb gf couldn't think of a thing call "the morning after pill" ni? Well you see God give us a brain for a reason, if you can't think and make logical decisions you will be left to face the consequences.

Welcome to the real world.

Demdem:
Jonah-daft is empty. he misses points by default.

Demdem:
Unfortunately, they didnt do it the last time. They focus entirely on Jonah-daft security therby causing loopholes that made the robbers succeed.
The police is to be blamed however if Jonah-daft hadnt come for a useless jamboree those lives wouldnt have been lost.

Demdem:
The people has seen that Jonah-daft is a curse. A fool who has not the interest of Nigerians at heart.
Tell me why sane minds wont want to associate with you?

Demdem:
[s]When u say 'we', what do u mean?
I only know of Fayose who also told us that her mother uses Pampers diapers and i guess he is mistaking her for General Buhari. Is ur papa using Pampers diapers also? if not, can u kindly substantiate this lie of urs?

Demdem:
[s]am not bro. Jonah-daft is a known failure. He failed miserably as my governor (2%) and currently failing as President (13%) during the time of much plenty we may never have in the nearest future. I have no personal issue with him. Thats my grouse with the fool.

cirmuell:
FIXED!

GboyegaD:
He who pays the poorer dictates the tube. You advertise those who pay you add the station is not run on charity purpose.

valmunich:
Can you please Swerve outta here and never return please... I'm pleading.

valmunich:
So what then is your point¿

valmunich:
Are you trying to make a point or what¿

valmunich:
She's fat

And what is she wearing BTW ¿

*shakes my head*
*spits on the lady*
*unzips my trouser *
*brings out my bulala*
*pees all around the picture down to the thread*
*shakes off my Bulala *
*zips back my trouser and sags it*
*Adjusts my eyeglass*
*pops my collar *

And gallants outta thread like a boss...

hillsate:
An interesting conversation between President Jonathan and Dame Patience.

Jona: Mama peace, please we need to have a family meeting now. Come sit down.

Pat: family abi cabin, sorry cabinet meeting.

Jona; I said family meeting. This one no concern Reuben, Doyin and that boy wey if you give money him go just dey sing for you.

Pat: You mean femi?

Jona; These people are putting me daily in serious trouble o. And instead of make you dey help me, you dey make am worse.

Patience; Wetin you mean by i dey make am worse.

Jona: How you go talk say Buhari na brain dead. See now you no fit go campaign for North.

Patience: haba Jo Jo, na mistake na. I actually no mean to say brain dead. I wan talk say person wey him brain don tire, i no know when i say brain dead. And instead that Femi Boy make him talk say i was quoted out of context, him talk say na true.

Jona: You see, thats why I talk say una no dey help me. Upon all the strategy wey them help me employ to bring GMB down, none dey work.

Patience: how you go say e no dey work? GMB popular don dey decrease na and by election time e go don fall finish.

Jona: na which news you dey hear that one .

Patience: AIT and NTA now. Them even talk say your approve rating don high. I don tell Peter for Ekiti make him release the next advert.

Jona: Talking about Peter, the guy dey campaign for me pass me sef. Him no dey ask for money o.

Patience: Him no dey ask for money? That guy eye tear for money o. All the money wey him use for advert him don collect am from that side na.

Jona: which side?

Patience: From iezani na?

Jona: chai! No wonder the guy dey tell me say make i no worry. Say him go do anything for me. You see that why I call this meeting. I don’t trust all these people campaigning for me. Na money them dey after.

Patience: Jona darling, make you calm down. I no wetin i dey do.

Jona: Abeg yarn.

Patience: You see, everybody wey we give money, we get him record and evidence of money wey him collect. You know say na my plan sey make you recruit Reuben and now Femi.

Jona: i know na your plan, why you leave Doyin out.

Patience: Doyin, no be me say make you recruit am. Yesterday for twitter him and some small small girls just dey abuse themselves. Why you recruit am sef?

Jona: No be me recruit am. I smart pass that guy na. Anyway i go investigate how him take enter my team. But I think its because Reuben was somehow quiet thats why.

Patience: Abeg find wey uproot that guy. Him na serious lieability.

Jona: talking of Reuben, he seems to be very quiet these days.

Patience: I been wan ask you sef. You sure say the guy no go defect comot so.

Jona: who? Reuben? Amala never finish for Aso rock na. You no see as him just dey fat.

Patience: Jona, please why you call this meeting

(Enter Reuben)

Reuben: Sorry oga for bashing in. I get one small message for Madam

Jona: Reuben, say it. What is it

Reuben: na small matter for Madam

Jona: say it.

Reuben: Madam, Peter don send that him boy again. Say iezani no give am complete.

Patience: Jona, you see.

Jona: Reuben, please leave us alone for now.

(Exit Reuben)

Jona: Patience! Patience!! Patience!!! How many times I call you

Patience: I still dey count am.

Jona: Make una softly with this money o. In case this our election no succeed, wahala dey go o.

Patience: how e no go succeed. Two prophets, one in Nigeria, one in Ghana talk say we go win.

Jona: Patience, I wan defect go APC.

Patience: You get fever abi make your body guard mix that thing.

Jona: I say I wan defect go APC.

Patience: Chai! Den don do am for me o. Jona! You wan wetin?

TO BE CONTINUED.

Diamby:
I can see an OP MESA vehicle in one of the pics i saw.What baffles me is the way people condon this kind of lawlessness because he wants to perpetuate himself in power after 5years of failures.I just wonder how people think.It was yaraduas death that made GEJ president so why all this desperation.Let us be frank with ourselves what has GEJ done to deserve the vote of lagosians.No matter the vested interest people talk about in LASG at least its impact is felt one way or the other.Take the BRT the prices are cheaper than normal buses thereby savings people some of there transport fares even when this wicked president removed subsidy the prices still remained the same.Let GEJ know that
he will die one day and those of us he has wronged will take back our rights from him in the hereafter and also if he his not careful he will punished in the fire of hell to abide therein forever.

Demdem:
Jonah-daft remains a curse.

Demdem:
[s]Tomafool, u too have been scare

Demdem:
Jonah-daft billions is talking. The fool will fail.

Demdem:
Shut ur trap.[b] The same way u emphatically stated that Tambuwal will be removed "next week". Months after, ur next week hasnt come. Arent u shameless?

Demdem:
Only fools have chosen to remain with Jona-daft. He remains a fool.

garrix8:
Eediot

fellis:
Jonathan is a confused coward.

Idrico:
Tinubu invested all his stolen money in Nigeria ,thereby creating thousand of jobs for Nigerians.Where are the other looters investment with all billions stolen from their states and NigeriaSMH.

kastonkastrol:
you should go back and check that your silly dictionary for the meaning of "criticism"... If someone criticize a bad person or a bad government, you guys will label that constructive criticism as an insult.. I tire oo
And btw who the heck is telling you guys that am not in Nigeria? Jeeez