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Jedisco's Posts

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Science/Technology › Re: Jeff Bezos Says Human Water Consumption Is Inhibiting AI Development by jedisco(m): 2:19pm On Jun 29
Nairaland sef.

Someone posts a picture and his personal opinion and everyone is up in arms.
What exactly did Bezos say and in what context was it said?

For those against AI, you can choose to bury your head in the sand just like many did with the internet and lots of technological advancements before that. Alternatively, you could choose to engage and build your productivity.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 2:47pm On Jun 28
Goke7:
Christians too supported hitler back in the day and also the slave trade in the ancient past. You’ll always have them like that while others will condemn such. At the end it’s not about the religion but the individuals themselves and what they personally believe in.

And as for Starmer it was always a question of when finally. Populism can be terrible and can never be the major instrument for governance or political aspirations. A time comes you need to get more serious and face the reality of governance. Since Brexit populism has continued to be used majorly in uk politics and the wealthy with their money continues to weaponise it against the interests of the society. When it will stop I don’t know but looks the uk may continue to change pms every market day if more serious things are not brought to the fore in the polity.
Sometimes, I wonder if religion is just another outlet by which humans express themselves.

Britain has become a film. The last 15yrs + has been focused on hounding those seen as foreign without addressing underlying causes of stagnation. Nigeria's debacle with fuel subsidy has shown certain structural changes are very difficult to make.
Phones › Re: Phones And Laptops Specialist In Ilorin by jedisco(m): 1:03pm On Jun 27
.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 7:48pm On Jun 21
Meloni...Trump..
Hehe

This mans shenanigans abd strong support from some Christian communities has got me thinking more of late about religion.

Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 7:46pm On Jun 21
Starmers removal now seems set. The merry-go-round of British politics continues.


He is a pragmatic keader devoid of the usual scandals the like of Boris brought. My grouse was that he leaned too far right to placate folks who'd never vote for him. I didn't vote Labour but appreciate his qualities.
I also expected that if given enough time, the popularity of Reform would have waned as they took over some councils. The next election is 3yrs in and that's alot of time.

On the other hand, the thinking of MPs would be to step in before it's too late. I still think the right wing media and parties have egged this on so as to throw Labour into a Tory-esque confused state that'd certainly lead to their demise.

Lets see if Burham performs magic or 'communicates better as nothing short of that would spell disaster.

Foreign Affairs › Re: UK Prime Minister, Keir Starmer To Announce Resignation On Monday by jedisco(m): 4:56pm On Jun 21
DiamondsAreFore:
Good riddance to garbage. Hands down the most incompetent and incapable PM in British history.

He knows his ill fated party is on the way out so he's jumping ship before it sinks.
What makes him so?
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m):
Goodenoch:
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DZm7tHFt1Lc/

People who justify or try to explain away racist violence and terrorism are no different from the perpetrators in the street. Beware of them wherever you meet them, whether online or offline.
Love how he deconstructed the popular dog whistle aka 'legitimate concerns'.

Finally, the pitchforks are out. Rich folks telling everyday folks the reason the reason they're struggling is cos of the brown person next door and everyday folks up in arms seeking 'justice'
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 9:06pm On Jun 20
Rerin:
Good day, I work with an health company which pays half of transportation to and fro client's homes. We started as Dom and now support but do so with those that don't drive. Suddenly since April, the finance staff has started claiming some bus tickets will not be paid. She said the bus ticket should ONLY show exact time i leave the client's house and time i leave home. She is dragging on paying the previous transportation expenses claiming invalid. The company did not send her to do this inquisitiveness cos i engaged the manager and he claimed to look into it. But seems the finance officer has no control and independent. She mentioned that since the location to the clients place is a bit more than 2 miles, that should be trekked. I guess that is the reason she is frustrating to reimburse the tickets purchased. Please how do some one respond or handle her in order to process the pending expenses since March, 2026 till date. The pending payment is taking toll on me. All my previous tickets purchased for a very far distance and at different countys have not been paid giving different excuses and challenging them as well. How do I handle her case to get the money paid.
Regarding your manager, what are they saying?

Sometimes, stuff like this can be sorted by a clear and strong worded email. What is she hinging on to make those changes? Is there a contact to fall back on? You could tell the finance officer that you disagree with her assessment and any change should definitely not be backdated. If there is no basis for her argument and she's unwilling to move ground, no harm asking your manager, her or HR how to escalate it.
Fashion › Re: Same Ankara Style On Slim, Curvy & Plus Size Ladies — Who Rocked It Best? by jedisco(m): 2:23am On Jun 20
Useless AI slop
Travel › Re: Living In The UK: Property,Mortgage And Related by jedisco(m): 6:26am On Jun 17
Ugmama:
They refused to confirm that I will not be charged more then the quote o.

They no reply my mail. They refuse to concur to me having independent solicitor I can communicate with regularly. Guys how is home legal direct? Agent of solicitors? Any experience working with them?
Regarding the bolded, many solicitors would leave a caveat just incase your file turns out more complex than expected. You can ask for reasonable assurances that the costs wouldn't rack up unless absolutely needed.
Also, many wouldn't give you a solicitor to communicate with. Most conveyancing is handled by their support staff and the solicitor signs off on it. It's the support staff that responds to your emails e.t.c
If I remember correctly, the only time I spoke to a solicitor directly was when they needed to sign the personal guarantee document on a BTL mortgage which my lender required. I had to pay privately for this.

Not used Home legal but there are no shortage of solicitors. A good way is asking someone who bought recently about their solicitor and if they had a good experience, they could refer you to them. I've also heard of Blacks Solicitors- that their fairly good and responsive.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 6:13am On Jun 17
Goke7:
Very true I even hear of redundancies in the nhs these days so it’s easy to see the frustration. Imagine getting redundant and you’re on a skilled worker visa as an nhs staff.
Lot's of uncertainty.
It's even better for NHS staff as their better protected. Also, with NHS experience, it's easier for them to get another role within the NHS if the look far and wide.
Hopefully, the economy doesn't keep getting worse as that would only lead to more redundancies
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 6:09am On Jun 17
Mcleo007:
Its one of few reasons.

I still have a while to reconsider if i will jump back in, as i understand, it resets after 2-3 years.
Hopefully, you get back in.

Pensions are very difficult to beat when it comes to saving for retirement and the NHS pension is the cherry on the cake for most people. It's mainly a few very high earners or some GP partners (who are responsible for paying both the employee and employer part of their NHS contributions) that may theorically come out better with SIPPs. I know a few people who have largely moved on from active healthcare roles or semi-retired but still do a handful of shifts every year solely to maintain their NHS pension annual uplift.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 6:03am On Jun 17
ehizario2012:
Thank you, I appreciate it. I'm still leaving it on for now, the additional income would be about £166 max monthly... So I don't think it's worth opting because of that amount sha.

The immigration situation has indeed made a lot of guys opt out o. Infact some stopped mortgage applications midway, we that obtained mortgage last year na God hand we dey.

The uncertainty is indeed altering people's decisions these days
Just remain. In 20yrs time, you should be smiling. Same with the mortgage. Congrats on that.

The mortgage one is tricky and very easy to push forward and before one knows, they've been paying rent in same area for 5 yrs. I also fell into same trap. First, it was Brexit and folks said prices would fall. I did my calculation and felt I wouldn't miss out on much. Then covid came and I pushed it forward thinking I'd not be in that area for more than 3 yrs. Before I knew it, prices were up by over 50k. I've come to see that before buying, it always looks like it's a bad time to buy. If one isn't sure they'd be leaving in less than 3 yrs, and they've had some stability, it's manytimes better to buy irrespective of what some social media financial analysts would say.

The key is buying a good property in a nice area. This is the fine line difficult to get right. In the hurry to buy, it's easy to pick up any property forgetting that one day, one would need to sell and things that make a property sought after hardly change.
Its sad that the uncertainty pushes migrants into questionable financial decisions which wouldn't help them or the nation at large.
Health › Re: I Want To Get Rid Of This Kpuff Toto But It's Not Working - Lady Cries Out by jedisco(m): 5:01pm On Jun 16
@Seun @mods
Why is this on NL frontpage?
'Kpufftoto' .. smh
Travel › Re: Living In The UK: Property,Mortgage And Related by jedisco(m): 1:03am On Jun 16
Ugmama:
Just for conveyancers to confirm I wont get extra fees to pay after getting their quote is difficult for them. I am not going with people that will put me on endless payments for their selfish gain.

Cheapest quote for property between 170-200k is 1900 pounds , how na?
Many would give some leeway just in case they encounter something unexpected but they should be able to state what instances hat would come into play.
I don't think the cost (for an average house) plays a huge role. The type of house may e.g flats can require more work. A 200k house in parts of the north can be worth double in parts of the south but the solicitors fees shouldn't be hugely different as they are not doing more work on one over the other based on their price.

You can shop around though. My quote 3 yrs ago was 1.8k ish for a circa 360k house. But that was 3 yrs ago and prices may have ticked up a bit.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 6:16am On Jun 15
justwise:
[/b]

Yup...the living gets richer the moment you are 6fit down under...basically you dying is someone's prayer point ....
Lol... your pikin kwa. Moreso something that can have a term limit.

There's no convincing you on this. Insurance no go chop your money
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 6:14am On Jun 15
Mcleo007:
This is one of many reasons I opted out. With how these people are so quick to shift the goal post, there is no telling they can't push the age to even above 70. I mean, once upon a time, the age of retirement was 60-63.
Was it on this basis you opted out?
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 6:13am On Jun 15
ehizario2012:
Thank you very much sir. This is a concise summary. Regards. The future is long time away though, and I've been reading that one can access the funds even if not living in the UK anymore at that time. But there's a lot of uncertainty!!! Another angle is that the age might be increased from 67 in the near future... For us under 40, it looks like opting out is a sensible option too. It's a really difficult decision right now...
Lets see it this way.
Before you exit, try and do it from a position of knowledge i.e, try and appreciate the full advantages and why it's called a 'gold plated' pension. If after that, you still want to leave, then no ish.

Try not to look at it from the Nigerian lens. The life expectancy in Nigeria is still in the mid-50's and retirement planning is far from robust. It's something we hardly did. Govt workers back home strike so that their retirement age can be increased. Some even go underhanded to achieve it. That's the opposite of what you have in the west where riots happen when a year or two is added to the retirement age.

It'd likely get to 70 by the time you retire. The retirement age rises as people live longer so it's not bad in itself. It seems far in the future but you'd most likely get there. Question is what are your plans when you do? If you want to retire early, there's the option of a SIPP which can kick in 10 yrs before state pension i.e 57yrs today. Before then, you can use an ISA if say 50 is your target. But I'd flip it and say that if looking to retire early, the NHS pension is not one to miss. It's practically what keeps many working in the NHS.

ehizario2012:
Thank you. While I agree uncertainty and risk is an integral part of investing (pension) in this case it seems very very significant. Out of a group of Nigerian friends in the NHS trust, I'm the only one still left on it.
Oh dear! The effect of recent events as regards visa rules are far-reaching.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 1:23am On Jun 14
Zahra29:
.....

My advice would be to ask this on one of the numerous Reddit housing /property investing sub pages - you'll definitely get broad perspectives and solid insights to help you. All the best.
grin
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 12:54am On Jun 14
Lexusgs430:
https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/uknews/two-charged-with-murder-of-devoted-father-outside-lewisham-nightclub/ar-AA25ch6M?ocid=sapphireappshare

Very sad on all fronts......
Bad news is rampant these days. When I read some of these violent crimes, I keep asking.. what were they even thinking
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 12:51am On Jun 14
Santa2:
I have family in the US where I I saw firsthand how insurance changed the trajectory of the lives. They were comfortably middle class , uncle died in 2006, 3 kids were in uni then, the insurance payout (about $1M) was invested wisely by my aunt and they still continuously reaping from the proceed investment from that payout. My cousins now have their own kids and that insurance payout from 20yrs ago ensured they didn't down grade their lives but upgrade it after the breadwinners death. For me the approach is insurance and investment. Diversify the portfolio grin
Interesting...its usually a nice bedrock when it works. It doesn't bring back the dead but gives their offspring a good headstart
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 12:47am On Jun 14
Fred2020:
personally think SpaceX is overvalued. Much of its valuation appears to be based on the assumption that it will become a global juggernaut and maintain a dominant position across multiple space-related industries globally.

While it undoubtedly has a significant technological lead today, many countries are becoming increasingly cautious about relying on U.S. companies for critical infrastructure. As a result, I doubt SpaceX will be able to capture as large a share of international markets as some investors expect. This is very different from the dot-com era, when U.S. technology and software were adopted globally with far fewer concerns around sovereignty, resilience, and strategic dependence.

I also think geopolitical fragmentation is likely to persist long after Trump leaves office.
Lots of talk abt SpaceX. The valuation itself is brutal and with Elons political shenanigans together with him being the face of the company, many nations would put some barriers to their spread.

Still indexed but it's not nice index fvnds are now being targetted to fuel this frenzy.
Eitherway, market keeps putting in all time highs like it doesn't care. The day this market would crash, e go bad.
Politics › Re: Kidnappings: Yoruba Monarchs To Invoke Deities Against Bandits by jedisco(m): 5:08pm On Jun 13
jmoore:
The white men left too early.

Another round of colonization is needed.
People who think like you are a main reason Nigeria is stuck. If you can't lead yourself and protect your freedom which many died for, then you're welcome becoming my slave.

What's shameful is the number of likes such posts get
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 4:16pm On Jun 07
Zahra29:
When sophistry fails, switch to ad
hominem. Lol



I don't owe YOU any explanation, but I'll come down to your level for a bit.

I used to be a silent reader when there were lots more intelligent and insightful contributors like @ThatGuyfromHR and Aphrodite.

Unfortunately they stopped commenting, and others like Duchess, and I felt I had to become "active" to counter the increasing levels of misinformation and entitlement (from the likes of you) that started to go unchallenged and uncorrected.

I cannot count the number of times I have "sprung to life" to provide information and clarity on immigration issues, especially when there were major and frequent changes to the immigration rules. You have no idea how many DMs I have received and people I have tried to help outside this platform.

I have discussed mortgages/ buying a home, jobs on this thread/platform. This week I shared an article about a landmark case where an Indian care worker won a handsome payout from his former care employer and I encouraged anyone affected to explore legal action against scam care agencies as a precedent has now been set.

I choose not to participate in pensions ,investing because I think this is a personal and sensitive area.

When the thread was more active, I used to participate in casual convos/"gists" including politics. I have passed on various hacks and product recommendations. I have disagreed with people but still had a pleasant relationship with them e.g. Cyberknight. I have always tried to be polite, even in disagreements, and I have never cussed anyone out.

However, due to "Zahra Derangement Syndrome" or ZDS, which you sadly appear to suffer acutely from, you do/will not see any of these positives . Your dislike of me has clouded your judgement and objectivity and whenever you've engaged with me (e.g. pretending to ask for pension/house advice or pretending to care about my heritage while desperate to label me an anchor baby whose parents came over by boat), it has always been with the thinly veiled intent to attack me or show off/"oppress" 🙄.
I ain't got time for that Mister 😂



LOL 😂 . I do beg your pardon.



Aww, is this your way of inviting me to the Canadian thread? 😊

Please try to rest from all this "wondering" so you can recover from ZDS.
Hehe @Z. This long epistle extolling your virtues? I agree with you.. woman of virtue.

Interestingly, we saw protests this last week and again, I was reminded of the last race riots and your effort to gaslight us. I remember you accusing me of hating Brits and I oddly had to defend myself from an undue insinuation. How time flies... Today I've moved on and have Brits like you (and me) paying down my mortgages while I do the Kings work in Canada. I hope you can now understand how nauseating it gets seeing folks hang on to being British like it's their life blood even to the extent of promulgating different cadres of Brits (where is Mr Television sef?)


All said, can I request your help in getting something done from utopia land wink
I've still got eyes set on British property investing and thanks to the welcome package received, I'm in a position where I can make a move. I gather the yeilds and capital growth in the north are relatively better than the south but so far I've been hesitant to look at an 'unknown' area. As it's going to be hands-off, I can as well seek the best return. Using your wealth of British experience, what would be the top three cities/towns to target? Good insight would be appreciated.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 2:21pm On Jun 07
Goodenoch:
Yup. That's literally the core of their purpose here and the kind of thing that unfailingly brings them out of the woodwork.

For me, the most telling part was them making light of and indirectly but very clearly justifying the racist violent attacks on people in the riots a couple years ago.
....

I wonder whether they've even given any thought to the impact of the constant negative rhetoric on immigrants' morale because it seems like denigrating immigrants of all stripes is a new Olympic sport where you get points by how much you can show that you're only tolerating them and will make life as difficult as possible for them if given power.

Arguing with the Zahras of this world is a waste of energy.
Hehe @waste of energy.

The infamous race riots.... Interestingly, we just had another round of protests. There was no gaslighting this time so perhaps lessons have been learned.

The path many migrants have to tread is an impossible one. There's the constant denegration in the media e.t.c and on the other hand, those hurling insults also expect you to 'integrate' (whatever that means). At a point, folks just stop caring and go beast mode
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 1:58pm On Jun 07
Goke7:
The fact that other threads have been created out of here is a testament to the success of this thread and that’s what matters.

It’s good to still have dissenters here so we have a feel of what it’s like from those on the other side and how they truly feel about whatever. This thread still serves lots of purposes just look at the pension conversation and am sure so many have been further enlightened about it. So many questions still come up here and get answered. Let’s not be swayed by those who tend to denigrate others that’s the current world we live in.

About those vacant businesses I tend to hear more about this from North America, don’t know usually hear almost anything from the uk and I know it exists just that info about them are almost non existent, what I hear more are Amazon delivery services (where you can operate a branded fleet) franchises and so on. Will be nice to know how buying vacant businesses in the uk works.
I agree with the bolded. It's important this place doesn't become an echo chamber like most of the internet with one view being perpetually reinforced. Also important is that opposing views are aired with respect.

Regarding retiring businesses, it's more constrained in the UK. There'd always be pockets of opportunity in every economy that many would miss - it's those I'm seeking. For e.g, a while back, someone told me about buying a room in a hotel. It was something I never knew about and apparently, he had done well doing that. Didn't pursue it due to certain complexities involved but it was an interesting proposal nonetheless.
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m):
I hope this thread can get past these shenanigans.

I remember when the mainstay of discussions here were solely focused on how to pass a driving test or improve ones credit score and folks got upset when discussions deviated from that. Today, while those are still important, we have moved to a broader array of topics. Where we were then was what gave certain voices the room to thrive. Now, we have the mortgage thread with an increasing number getting on the mortgage ladder.

Like I said before, it takes a significant level of underachievment for one to see their life satisfaction from a piece of kpali to the extent of hoping around denigrating others. Experience tells me most of these folks are probably living off benefits paid for by working members of the society. There's lots of wealth to be made in the UK with new evolving pathways and vacant businesses as older folks retire. Those old enough should at least be able to share experiences.

I remember gulping on Ticha's mussings about her experience in NZ where she went to work as a teacher. She also discussed how she put her UK home on AirBnB while there- an idea that came to mind when I moved. If not mistaken, she also posted pics of a house they bought and how they went about renovating it- too bad, she didn't continue this as I was deeply interested and did something similar. All said, I am quite certain that certain narratives will dissipate with time
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 2:58am On Jun 03
Zahra29:
You've written a lot without actually saying a lot.

You're conflating 2 different things and have completely missed the point of my original post.

1. The discussion was not whether or not a British national is currently a net -ve or +ve relative to a recent migrant. Of course a Brit born and raised would be a -ve starting out. This is true of EVERY nation that invests properly in its young people. Just as you also are/were a net -ve to your home country due to your government subsidising your medical training.

2. The point, dear reader, is that it is a false claim that a recent migrant has paid more into the NHS (by paying the IHS) than his British peer. Using your example - if you came into the UK at e.g 28y/old and assuming you paid £3k IHS for an initial 3 year visa - it is ridiculous to think that this payment matches or exceeds the cumulative contributions of a 28 y/old junior doctor who has been working since he was 23

It's a very simple, obvious fact and no lengthy writeup can change this.

...
I pondered explaining what 'net' means but thought to myself - there's no point engaging this.

You've been active on this thread for several years but only spring to life when it's time to denigrate Nigerians or to tell us not to complain when being treated badly as afterall 'Saudi Arabia does xyz'

When folks discuss pensions, mortgages, ISAs, investing, businesses, jobs e.t.c it's all crickets from your likes. Even when I asked you personally for pension advise, it was lipsrsealed
For someone who claims to be British, your telling lack of input on matters that actually count is glaring. I wonder what you'd move to as most here go on to secure their permanent stay. The next set of migrants perhaps
Foreign Affairs › Re: South Africans Chase Zimbabwean Lady Out Of Her Shop And Loot The Shop by jedisco(m): 2:33pm On Jun 01
seppuku:
But some of them are saying they liked it better under apartheid.
It's mental slavery and failure of their leaders to tackle wealth inequality and move the country forward.

A good example of what hate can do
Foreign Affairs › Re: South Africans Chase Zimbabwean Lady Out Of Her Shop And Loot The Shop by jedisco(m): 2:26pm On Jun 01
Onyiiobi7735:
grin grin SAs behave worse than a pack of wild dogs.
This is exactly what Whites saw decades ago in them, and imposed the apartheid system on them.
Of all 55 countries of Africa, only SA experienced apartheid.
Truly the blacks there deserved it many times over.
Nobody deserves apartheid. You can discuss what's going on without looking down on your race
Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m): 5:31pm On May 31
Goke7:
Here is the answer again 😂
The ever-revolving circle of British migration.
It's easy to think this is all new but it's not. Every excuse has been given before.
Was doing some reading yesterday and stumbled upon some gory facts of what migrants who came earlier faced.

The odd thing is that many of these kids faced a lot when growing up. I knew a doctor who recounted some gory details of what she and ber brother went thru. She sometimes would breakdown in the middle of work when she has flashbacks.
The more one knows about the British society, the more you see thru most of the loud-mouthed ones.

Travel › Re: Living In The Uk-life Of An Immigrant (part 3) by jedisco(m):
Zahra29:
A brief study of UK political history will show you that even King Charles could not save the Tories right now. They have to spend a certain amount of time in the electoral wilderness, probably till at least 2034 GE, before the public forgives them for their failings, including the "Boriswave" which has become mainstream and even has its own Wiki page lol

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boriswave
I'm not surprised that the term 'Boriswave' and the denigration they've received gives you joy. Do remember that an overwhelming majority would ultimately become Brits like you and me. Sure, they do have their wiki page just like the Windrush boat arrivals do- it's the recurring story of British immigration which you should know.


Like I've said multiple times, I still don't get it.
At what point in the development of some migrant kids does their thinking deviate?
At what point does the child of a Windrush boat arrival start seeing themselves any better than tax-paying folks migrating today? Or is it folks like Kemi who is a product of birth tourism or is it Priti Patel the daughter of refugees? I just don't get it.

To be clear, I don't need/expect them to support migration today. That's an individual decision. However what I don't get is how they see themselves/parents any different from the 'Boriswave'

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