₦airaland Forum

Joshua Beckford is listed among the top 30 most remarkable people in the World with Autism that have impacted on Society on The Illumination Foundation website `We the Spectrum` in North Carolina USA. He is also the youngest person ever to complete a course in Philosophy and History at Oxford University (OLP) on-line learning Platform at the age of 6. He wants to be a neuro surgeon and taught himself to perform complex surgical operations on Microsoft Surgery Simulator. He can correctly use all the instruments and successfully complete operations such as the removal of a Hernia, appendectomy, removal of a cataract, varicose, and tonsillectomy, repair a lower leg fracture and perform a Cholecystectomy (surgical removal of the gall bladder).

Joshua Beckford has unusual skills in 8 different areas. Math’s, Foreign Language, History, Philosophy, IT, Art and Science and sport. He is on the autistic spectrum – Asperger’s (High functioning). Joshua was born in the U. K in 2005.He was taught at home from the age of 10 months. He learned to read fluently using phonics at 2 years 6 months old.

Recently, Joshua was appointed Boys Mentoring Advocacy Network {BMAN} Low Income Families Education {L.I.F.E} Support Ambassador. BMAN Low Income Families Education (L.I.F.E) Support was established to create educational opportunities for children from low income families so that they have hope of positively contributing to a thriving society.

Joshua Beckford along with his father Knox Daniel will visit Nigeria in August 2019 to anchor a mentoring session for the BMAN Father and Son Together (FAST) Initiative under the theme “Beyond Limits”.

http://www.bmanadvocacy.org/2019/04/15/beyond-limits-with-joshua-beckford/

LAGOS, NIGERIA – Institutions, organizations, and individuals throughout our global village will observe “World Day Of The Boy Child” on 16 May 2018 under the theme, “Protecting Our Boys . . . Reclaiming Our Heritage”. Of the 7.6 billion souls with whom we share Planet Earth, 3,874,259,756 are males and 1,004,638,305 souls of these souls are under the age of 15. Boys are more than mere extensions of ourselves. These souls represent our heritage and serve as one of the links to the past and the present that intersects with the future of our families, our communities, and our world. Created under the International Men’s Day umbrella, “World Day Of The Boy Child” was inaugurated in 2018 by Gender Issues Thought Leader, humanitarian, faculty member in the History Department at the University of West Indies, prolific author, and International Men’s Day Founder Jerome Teelucksingh, Ph.D.

The 1,004,638,305 souls who are males under the age of 15 – boys – emerged from the womb with irrepressible enthusiasm, insatiable curiosity, a natural and spontaneous reaction to disappointment, rejection, failure, and spiritual, physical, psychological, and emotional pain, and a pristine view of the world. They are fragile and vulnerable. Somewhere along the journey from boyhood to manhood, boys are socialized not to express the natural and spontaneous reactions to spiritual, physical, emotional, and psychological pain, disappointment, and rejection. They are socialized to equate strength and masculinity with suppressing their natural and spontaneous reaction to pain, disappointment, and rejection; not asking for help; and shunning vulnerability. In actuality, vulnerability is about strength – it is about standing in front of another soul spiritually, psychologically, and emotionally naked. Many of these 1,004,638,305 souls are suicidal, slowly descending into the deep dark abyss of depression, and consumed by low self-esteem and repressed emotions.

According to the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development, an organization based in Paris, France which administers the triennial Programme for International Student Assessment (“PISA”) which examines the proficiency of 15 year olds in over 90 nations in reading, reading comprehension, science, mathematics, writing, and writing comprehension – boys throughout our global village are academically underperforming their female counterparts. The PISA scores for girls are much higher than those of boys in reading, reading comprehension, and writing comprehension. Boys find it difficult to navigate a literacy-based curriculum. Educators and school administrators equate boys’ difficulty or inability to read with their level of intelligence, label them as either “intellectually challenged” or “unteachable”, and arbitrarily ship them off to special education classes. The majority of these boys are brilliant. Rather than investigating why boys have difficulty developing reading and reading comprehension skills or making adjustments in the curriculum – adjustments which would include infusing the curriculum with reading material that interests boys and captivate their attention — boys are allowed to read several grades below their current grade level. Eventually, they lose interest in school and drop out. Unless an individual, organization, or institution intervenes, these souls will mature into uneducated, unemployable, and unskilled adults who will find it difficult to resist the pull of gravity of illegitimate economic opportunities and the fast track to prison.

At least 3,000,000,000 souls are living on less than US$2.50 each day and approximately 1,000,000,000 children are living in poverty – many of whom are boys. Boys born into impoverished families are unable to attend school because the cost of textbooks and school supplies exceed the family’s monthly or annual income. The International Labour Organization which is headquartered in Geneva, Switzerland estimates that approximately 1,199,400,000 children are engaged in child labor. It further estimates that 786,600,000 of the 1,199,400,000 young souls engaged in child labor are boys. There are between approximately 300,000 to 500,000 child soldiers – children as young as 7 years old – who are recruited to serve in armed militias – children who are witness to and participants in atrocious acts of brutality and deadly violence. Approximately 60% of the souls forced to serve as child soldiers are boys. The United Nations’ most recent “Children And Armed Conflict Report” monitored the violation of children’s rights in 20 nations that are engulfed in bloody conflicts. These nations employ the services of children who serve as solders, suicide bombers, spies, and messengers. Verified cases of recruitment and employment of children as soldiers in nations which include, but are not limited to, Yemen, the Syrian Arab Republic, South Sudan, Nigeria, Somalia, the Central African Republic, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo appear in the report. Since 2017, the United Nations International Children’s Emergency Fund has helped more than 8,700 children – many of whom are boys — who served as child soldiers and were released from armed groups that engaged their services to reintegrate into civilian life and find and reunite with their families.

“World Day Of The Boy Child” serves as a platform for individuals, organizations, and institutions to improve the manner in which we protect our boys and reclaim our heritage. How? Global and Regional Coordinators for “World Day Of The Boy Child” are offering a few suggestions:

Rewrite the narrative on strength and masculinity by equating strength with vulnerability.
Facilitate and moderate Global and National Town Halls which serve as venues for boys and adolescent males to engage in a “straight-no chaser dialogue” to express to key stakeholders what they need and want to safely and successfully navigate the arduous journey from boyhood to manhood. The key stakeholders with whom boys and adolescent young males would engage in discussions include educators, school administrators, law enforcement professionals, legal professionals, health care professionals and providers, social services professionals and providers, parents, legislators, business leaders, and Fatherhood and Men’s Issues advocates and practitioners. Global and National Town Hall Meetings would also serve as a venue for boys and adolescent males to co-design and co-monitor — with key stakeholders — initiatives that provide them with the resources and tools they need to successfully and safely navigate their journey from boyhood to manhood.
Identify and support existing initiatives which have a successful track record of addressing and helping to eradicate the (A)academic underperformance of boys and adolescent males and their mischaracterization as being “unteachable”, “intellectually challenged”, and “behavior problems”; (B) rising incidence of depression and suicide among boys and adolescent males; (C) recruitment and utilization of boys and adolescent males as child soldiers; (D) underlying causes of poverty which lead to boys and adolescent males working full-time to support their families and not attending school; (E) literacy gap for boys and adolescent males; (F) lack of legitimate real-life options; and (G) lack of positive male role models.
Employ male educators and administrators in schools located in communities that have Fatherless households or households devoid of a dominant male presence.
Design and implement “male-inclusive” curricula in Grades K-12 – by introducing reading material that captures the interest of boys and adolescent males. Primary schools and high schools would be required to provide its male student population from ages 5 through 17 with textbooks and classroom and reading materials that are action and science-oriented and informational.
Design and implement a “No Boy Left Behind Literacy Initiative” which results in every boy reading at least one grade level above his current grade.
Offset the repressed anger of boys and adolescent males which is a by-product of their current socialization with the design of mandatory anger management and conflicts resolution training. All primary schools and high schools would be required to include and implement mandatory anger management and conflicts resolution training in their curricula. As a result, boys in the 5 through 17 age group in every school can be provided with essential emotional, psychological, and decision-making tools that will help them safely and successfully navigate the arduous journey from boyhood to manhood.
For further information about “World Day Of The Boy Child” and how you can participate, please contact olaakinwe@bmanadvocacy.org or ca+234 802 301 0608 +234 815 500 2255

Source:http://www.bmanadvocacy.org/2019/04/18/world-day-of-the-boy-child-16-may-2019-protecting-our-boys-reclaiming-our-heritage/

Sometimes I feel lost and I do not know my use. I feel worthless and my parents don’t make me feel any better. I don’t know why I was sent into this life. Am I here to please someone and if yes, who? I am clueless about who I am and I feel like I’m an unwanted pest. No one needs me except for the minor things like going on petty errands. My parents see me as a failure and I’ve not found a way to prove them wrong. In fact, I kind of believe them and feel they should never have given birth to me in the first place. -Olaolu, 17

A person without purpose is a person in prison without any hope of freedom. – Ola Akinwe

Our progress towards a meaningful life begins with a vital question: Why am I here? Where am I going? What do I really need?

Most people are wandering in this world. Can one chose to be a wanderer? Why wandering? At one stage in life we feel empty and seek to be filled.

To find his place and fill it is success for a man—Brooks

Until you find your place and fill it, you remain a wanderer in the wilderness of life.

Finding your why is defining your purpose. Purpose has been defined as follows;

Purpose is the original intent for the creation of a thing.

Purpose is the original reason for the existence of a thing

Purpose is the need that makes a manufacturer produce a specific product.

The definitions above explain purpose as a motive and a need. Purpose as a motive makes clear the function for which a person or a product is made to serve. Purpose as a need reveals the importance of a person or product. Purpose as a need means a person or a product you could not do without.

A purposeful life would mean a life lived to satisfy your motive and become a person that is influential, memorable—significant in history with an incredible ability, very pleasing, enthusiastic and prominent.

Living a purposeful life necessitate to firstly identify your motive and abilities.

A purposeful life could be liken to delicious meal. It takes a chef to firstly make out a lists of ingredients needed to prepare a delicious meal, go source for these ingredients and get into the cooking process to finally produce a meal that is soul satisfactory. Should the chef ignore or omit any of his key ingredients, of course he will prepare a meal but not a delicious meal. Such meal might be good to fight your hunger but will never satisfy your hunger.

How do you identify the key ingredients for a purposeful life? What makes a life purposeful? How do you know you are not living a purposeful life?

After over a decade of study on purpose and those who lived a purposeful life I discovered seven key ingredients for a purposeful life.

A Purposeful Life is Pragmatic

A pragmatic person’s realm is results and consequences. In life, a pragmatic approach is often more successful than idealistic one. A pragmatic person deals with the issues that exist in their life in a reasonable and logical way instead of depending on ideas and theories. They act on good judgment and practical ideas or understanding. They solve problems in a sensible way that suits the condition that really exists. They live in the reality of the present.

A pragmatic person will wear clothes or shoes practical and suitable for the purpose they are needed for, rather being attractive or fashionable.

A Purposeful Life Unifies......continue reading http://teenspring.org/7-functions-purposeful-life/

In all sincerity, I do not know what I came to do in this world. I have different dreams and they all muddle up into one big pile of confusion. I am a science student and I felt going into medicine would bring my family lots of money but I’ve retraced my steps and decided to follow my passion for the arts. The problem is........ continue reading[i]http://teenspring.org/question/in-all-sincerity-i-do-not-know-what-i-came-to-do-in-this-world/[/i]

My dearest daughter Adunola,
You would be the joy of the blessedness of my youth
When you're set to get married
Never marry a man you're not willing to respect.
Don't rebel against your partner
Don't compete with your hubby
Bond with his family members before you set boundaries with them,
Live a simple and modest life
Don't accept gifts you can't maintain with your income.
Create your investment separate from your hubby.
Never allow your kids attend schools you can't afford with your income
Don't work for what you want to get but what you want to become.
Read the bible and biographies
Spent time with your family, respect others, seek for understanding in all affairs, make sacrifice for your families and be tolerant.
God's supernatural favour and His unlimited, undeniable goodness and mercy be upon you always.

Dad

What do you do when you realize you are married to the “wrong person?

A wife is a friend first, a lover second, and third and probably most important, a maid.- How true?

What would you do if your annual income suddenly becomes your weekly/monthly income?

What is the different between first love & first date?

Lordabas: Story of my life. Accused of being a snob growing up but I've always been a bit shy and and introverted so I appeared that way. I felt aweful, bullied and picked on. As I grew older I've learned how to present myself better but I'll always be an introvert.
Over the years I've been falsely accused of saying and doing things that I didn't. I felt victimized and powerless. I couldn't always defend myself or prove my innocence. I was an easy target for blame.
BUT ALL THAT STOPPED HAPPENING WHEN I DEVELOPED SELF ESTEEM.

Thanks for the response

poshest: I was here

really?

adioolayi: It's a bitter thing to experince...Mine was about 14yrs ago, during WAEC exam..one of our internal invigilators was so effective that she didnt allow the school bad boys use expos.after the exam, the boys beat her to comma...she was hospitalised for days. Instead of the school authorities to make thorough investigation to apprehend the culprits, they only presented the students album to the hospitalised teacher and so, our looks in the passport was the bases of her choice......unfortunately I was chosen because I looked hard and rough in the passport, so lots of innocent students were punished and diagraced at the assembly ground. Bad Memory...I tell you!

That was serious!

Have you ever been wrongly accused or punished for what you did not do? what was your feelings like? how did you get through it? how long does it take to get through it? let us talk, am going through it right now.
- See more at: http://www.pandctimes.com/forums/topic/false-accusation/

Why do the lazy men get the good women?

Source:http://www.pandctimes.com/forums/topic/why-do-the-lazy-men-get-the-good-women

The crumbled walls of the Brazilians became the expressway for the Germans to victory? who will rebuild the wall of the Brazilians and when?

What would you do if you were married to a man who did not care for your kids and didn’t lift a finger to help you?

Yea, I just realized that most Nigerians love to read gossip stuff that is of no value to them. What a generation?

really? pls read again. try! try!! try!!!

Sometimes i wonder how people process information and react to it. Responsible and matured minds will appreciate this post not minding the thread so far. Thanks bros!

Very well said!

Everyone around us struggles in marriage.

But you wouldn’t know it because most people feel bad about their struggle, so they hide it.

I have yet to meet a couple who were not challenged to some degree.

As a couple’s coach and relationship specialist, I work with this all day, every day.
If you are married, or you are going to get married, it’s important to read this thoroughly. It may help you be more realistic.

The media and our culture inundate us with misinformation about how relationships are supposed to be. Many of us still think that when we find the one all will be well and they will complete us. Or maybe some of us think a “conscious” relationship means that we somehow transcend our issues, triggers and neurosis.

When we finally do commit to a long-term relationship and the warm fuzzies of the honeymoon stage wear off after six months or a year or two, we finally get to the goods of a real relationship.

One of the first things we discover is that it is challenging.

We struggle, blame, judge and even hate. We shut down, we distance, we run away. We do and say mean things or we just freeze in fear. We do all the things that we did as a child, (but probably don’t remember) or we act like our parents—the thing we’d swore we’d never do. We then suffer because our fantasy of what we thought a relationship was supposed to be doesn’t match our lived experience of the real relationship we are in now.

We discover that a relationship is full of pleasure yes, but that it is also full of pain. It’s not just happy, but it’s sad. It’s not just blissful, it’s depressing. We don’t just experience warm fuzzies, we also experience cold iciness and rage.

Then, we judge ourselves against the one-sided marriage paradigm that was sold to us. We get depressed thinking that perhaps we made a mistake or something is wrong with us. Or, we blame our spouse and hold them accountable for our pain, which is also depressing.

Some of us might feel alone and struggle to tell anyone about what’s really going on, perhaps because we don’t have those kinds of friends. And, even if we did have friends that would accept us in our funk as we fumble through marriage, our culture trained us to hide our relationship struggles so we put on our upbeat face and continue hiding. We unconsciously embrace the game everyone plays in this culture to be a half-version of ourselves.

But when it’s quiet and no one’s looking, we might be courageous enough to look in the mirror and acknowledge that we are in pain, that we don’t know how to get through it, and that we are in unknown territory.

We might take the next step and admit we can’t do it alone, so we finally reach out to someone for help. We might first talk to a close friend, a pastor, a therapist or our parents to get their councel. But often what we receive is not what we need. The most common response we can get is advice, problem solving and fixing—all well intentioned with the agenda of getting us back to “normal,” which translates into getting us back to our happy place.

This lack of validating our experience has us feeling more alone and even stupid. Remember, other people don’t want us to suffer. Our suffering makes them uncomfortable. So, if we are not careful and we want their approval/acceptance, we might abandon our true feelings and take their advice and try to get back to being happy again. But meanwhile under our mask, our suffering ensues.

Next, if we are religious or spiritual, we may look to our texts and self-help books to support us. We might even pray to God to make our suffering go away. We might even meditate and try to pseudo-embrace our pain all the while secretly wanting it to go away.

Yikes!

This entire process is common, normal, and I see it every day.
In my experience as a relationship guide, people finally get into a marriage and have no idea what’s at stake and no idea how to proceed. It’s like being lost in a thick forest in a far away place with no map.

Add kids to the mix, years of financial stress, miscommunication, less and less sex and an inability to do real conflict, and we have a recipe for affairs, divorce and stuck marriages. If we are honest, we finally start to admit we have few to no skills in the long-term relationship department.

The feelings we bottled up or tried to hide begin to leak out, sometimes as a slow drip, and other times as a raging mountain torrent. Or we feel afraid to move one way or the other, so we stay frozen in inaction, unsure of how to proceed. Meanwhile our body bears the burden as we compartmentalize our pain in silence, all the while we get sicker and sicker year after year.

Eventually we start to see that we learned what was modeled to us. We realize there was no relationship class in school. We just digested what was modeled to us.

We look around, compare ourselves to others and think, “they seem like their marriage is great, so what’s my problem?” But remember that under the masks of everyone around you is a hidden layer, a layer they, like you, would rather hide.

When we don’t want to find out for ourselves what marriage is all about and the wild, rigorous, enchanting, painful path it forces us to face, we end up settling on a myriad of outdated and ineffective views given to us by our parents, culture, traditions or teachers. And in doing so, we perpetually avoid the massive opportunity for healing and growth that is staring us in the face day in and day out for years on end.

So, a gentle reminder that when we bought, without knowing it, the old way of relating, what I call “relational ignorance,” we set ourselves up for a big ol’ fantasy-slow-burn-let down. And, when we choose to keep living it this way, it’s supposed to suck.
Marriage is work. A real relationship is work.

It requires skill, a powerful context, embodiment and our rational thinking mind. It requires what I call “relational awareness and literacy.” A real relationship includes all of us, all shades, all colors, the dark, and the light. It’s happy sometimes and it’s sad sometimes. And, many people bail because they keep trying to live a fantasy that doesn’t match up with reality. In other words, the territory doesn’t match the map they were given in childhood.

Relating well then becomes an art, a master skill, to really see relationship as a path to our own wholeness and freedom.

Relationship is what we are all designed for. It’s who we are.

And marriage, if we have the proper view and tools, is an alchemical journey catapulting and demanding us to become all that we are.

But remember, we must say yes to growth and have a willingness to learn how to face all that comes up within the confines of marriage, monogamy and long-term partnership. And, once we do, we’re on our way to marriage empowerment and fulfillment.
Source:www.elephantjournal.com

Fellow Nairalanders, I read this post before sharing it. It does make a lot of sense if you take time to read and possibly read again for the second time. If truly you've gone through emotional withdrawal at a point in your relationship and care about it. this post is really valuable.

How would you define a father?
What are the roles of fathers in the society?
What is the true meaning of a father?
My life as a father has helped me to know the true meaning of a father. Being a male is a chance but being a dad is a great choice. How you make the choice of being a dad is the most daunting task of every male child.
Briefly let me tell you a little of my background, my father was an alcoholic and I grew up to know him with his excessive drinking. He died last year at the age 80, but until his death he was known for his drunkenness.
One good thing I can remember him for is that he taught me how to read. You may want to ask what I mean but the truth is that my both parents were illiterates. Once a child could read my father was done with that child. This belief of his kept me searching for the true meaning and roles of a forever father.
Back to the above questions, what should be your definition of a father? I have deeply thought about what I can teach children about who is a real father? Interestingly what came to mind is to think about the question my father regularly asked me “Can you read?”
“A father is a Responsible Educator Available Daily”- Ola Akinwe
This to my surprise has led to the discovery a new definition of a father as defined above. You will agree with me that my father was right with his belief that every dad should teach their children to read.
The four best ways to be a good father are; - See more at: http://www.pandctimes.com/top-4-ways-good-father

In a relationship, having your partner withdraw at an emotional level can bring confusion, pain and frustration.

Women who relate to men that do this are often bewildered by why and how this happens. Speaking as a man, and one who considers himself sensitive and emotionally available, there are particular situations and scenarios that cause me to withdraw. And I imagine that other men, regardless of how in-tune they are with their emotional nature, would respond in similar ways.

Just because a man withdraws does not mean he is withdrawing from you.

First, I just wanted to express that when a man seeks solace or withdraws from a conversation, it probably has nothing to do with the beloved. It has more to do with the emotional intensity and confusion around emotions than with any particular person. It just takes men more time to integrate and understand the watery realm of emotions. And understanding emotions isn’t something that happens for us spontaneously in the midst of a heated discussion. We need space and time to figure out what is happening, both within our own self and with our beloved. Men have been discouraged from feeling emotional. We have been mocked, attacked, and belittled when showing emotions. Big boys don’t cry, toughen up, and bite the bullet are all phrases men grow up with. So when we are faced with emotional situations, we are total novices. The biggest harm that is not recognized or appreciated for the depth of damage that it causes at the emotional level to a man is that men are expected to be tough, to protect, and kill to defend their family. Violence, and the expectation of violence, mandates an absence of emotional sensitivity.
It is a double standard to expect a man to be emotionally available and to have him be able to harm another human being.

Have compassion and understand the kind of conundrum that a man faces when being emotional vulnerable and awakening to deeper sensitivities. It is rare enough to find a man who wants to delve within and unleash his inner passion. It doesn’t mean that he is going to be masterful at it. For men to be comfortable in their own skin and accept their feeling nature takes a growth curve.

A woman has a lifetime of experience navigating the oceanic tides of emotional states.

Women grow up with emotional states and are accepted as sensitive, feeling beings. She is able to observe, feel, recognize and better communicate her feelings than a man. Women are also adept at observing and recognizing the emotional states in other people. And when a woman finds a man who loves her, at some level, she feels a great deal of hope because she has found an emotional match, somebody who understands those hidden tides and influences. Women will share all their heart and feelings, and not understand how this can impact a man. And when a man doesn’t respond as she needs, the feelings of being hurt or misunderstood arise. How those feelings are expressed matter a great deal.

The best men want an intimate connection with women, and often don’t know how to do that.

Men don’t fall short in the emotional realm because we are emotionally immature. We are emotionally inexperienced. Men face expectations and pressure about emotions that are confusing and contradictory. And when we find a woman who loves us and we love in return, it brings to life a living fire that had been suppressed for a lifetime. Yet fires burn, and the burgeoning sensitivities is akin to a child learning to walk. We fall down, we make blunders, and we are blind as to how to listen and communicate our emotions.

Men experience a learning curve when awakening to their deepest sensitivities.

And just as any beginner, they make mistakes. Sometimes the mistakes are colossal, and sometimes laughable. Men need an emotional example, how to be live with and operate with emotions in a healthy way. We also need to be accepted as we are, beginners with beautiful intention. To demand for a man to have the mastery over their emotions is an outrageous expectation. For most men, mastery over emotions means suppressing them, hiding feelings behind a mask of stoicism, or just turning off the emotions entirely. It takes time to even identify the subtle emotions, let alone to know how they function and their influence on our own self and those around us.
Any teacher knows that mocking a beginner or putting them down, criticizing them or their approach, will stunt the learning curve, if not completely stopping it.

The beloved woman becomes that guide into the mysterious realms of feeling emotions. When she expresses anger, puts down her man, belittles or mocks him, a man feels attacked. When she demands him to be sensitive, a man feels.......
- See more at: http://www.pandctimes.com/top-reasons-men-withdraw-emotionally-relationship

While times are tougher than normal, the best marriages and love affairs will sustain the test of time for all the right reasons – during good or bad times the best loving relationships almost always survive. And we know why!

The truth is,our economy is on roller coaster ride, but in an historical sense, there is nothing particularly unusual about the current economic turmoil. We have been here before. There have been worse times.

The more important question through all this is, “How do we as a married couple, or lovers engaged in a loving relationship, make sure we sustain our love affair through all this turmoil, through all this uncertainty?”

Balancing the family budget requires teamwork. It requires common goals. It most certainly requires family support. People in love support each other through thick and thin – through tough times and uncertainty.

People in love don’t blame, castigate, or chastise each other in tough economic times. They work together to make ends meet and to prepare for tomorrow.

There is a natural tendency in tough times to blame the one you love for your collective misfortune. There is, sadly, the desire to find a scapegoat when times get tough. There is, unfortunately, the need to find someone to blame when your economic fortunes go south. But it doesn’t have to be that way because the truth is, there usually is no one to blame for your misfortune.

People in love don’t wallow in self-pity. They grab “the bull by the horns” and work for solutions – recognizing that running a household is not easy. Making a family work is, clearly, difficult even in the best of times. But the unequivocal truth is this – if you don’t view your relationship as one requiring teamwork, all is lost. If you don’t work together to address head-on the economic challenges of your relationship with each other, there is little hope of success.

Whether you lost your job due to downsizing or whether you had to take a pay cut to keep the job you have, always remember this, what sustains your relationship is being in love with someone you trust – someone you would trust with you love, your sacred honor, and with your life.

Here are the seven most important actions you can take to protect your marriage during tough economic times:
- See more at: http://www.pandctimes.com/7-best-ways-protect-marriage-tough-financial-times/#sthash.1RTHSiYR.dpuf

If your fiance/fiancee always threaten to leave you anytime there is a little disagreement between both of you and You have to beg him or her to stay, You are a divorcee in the making. If what matters to God does not matter to your fiance/ fiancee, you are in a wrong relationship!
Any single guy who double dates is a polygamist in the making. Any single lady who double dates is a potential polyandry.
Singles that are preparing for marriage, should get a regular source of income before marriage.Marriage is not just about sex, kissing or romance! Bills must be paid. Diapers must be bought. School fees must be paid. And Your landlord will collect his rent. The wife to be should also get something doing to support her husband! If nobody employs You please employ yourself before your wedding. Discover and Develop Your Talent. Don’t depend on people because people may only sponsor your wedding but they can’t sponsor your marriage. Take it or leave it, There can be no real romance without finance.
- See more at: http://www.pandctimes.com/valuable-advice-intending-couples-marriage

What does it mean for you to live?
can we live forever?
How do I live?
Where do I live?
What do I live for?
That you exist therefore you must live. How to live is the greatest question everyone should answer. To exist and not live is not better than a stillbirth. To live means to belong to the ages, it can also mean to remain relevant in the affairs of mankind long after you are gone out of this world. To live is to be a hero.
Why many are wandering right now is because they want to live but they don’t know how to live. Can you decide to live? Oh yes! To live is a choice, to exist is for all.
For anyone to live, your life must be; lovable, inspiring, valuable and educating others.
L= love others
I= Inspire others
V= Valuable to others
E= Educate others
- See more at: http://www.pandctimes.com/4-best-ways-live-forever/#sthash.41YUCqi1.dpuf

Why Reusable Baby Cloth Diaper Is a Must Use for Nursing Parents
We are 100% convinced reusable is the way to go! But in case you or a loved one is doubtful, we took it upon ourselves to survey nearly 700 cloth diapering families from around the globe just for you! All of those who participated in the survey are currently using Cloth Diapers and they so graciously wanted to share with you why they made the leap into cloth diapering and will never look back!


Here is what these cloth diapering families had to say:
What is the #1 reason you are committed to using cloth diapers?
45.5%For the financial savings28%Because cloth is healthier against my baby's delicate skin16%For the environmental benefits6.5%Because by baby breaks out in diaper rash from disposables2.2%Other1.8%Because reusables are so darn fashionable!
How often do you use cloth diapers?
72%Always: day, night, & out and about.15.3%Almost always: with the exception being nighttime8.4%At home only during day and night; we use disposables when out3.6%At home only during the day; we use disposables at night and when out0.4%At daycare only0.4%Only in emergencies: when I have run out of disposables
In a weeks time, how much time do you spend in laundering your diapers?
34%0-1 hour52%1-2 hours10%2-3 hours3%3-4 hours1%4-5 hours
How much easier is it to use cloth diapers than you originally thought?
65.5%Using cloth is SO much easier than I thought it would be.20.4%Using cloth is slightly easier than I thought it would be.12%Using cloth is about what I had expected.1.8%Using cloth is harder than I thought it would be.0.4%Using cloth is surprisingly impossible to master
When researching which type of cloth diaper you wanted to try on your baby, what was the #1 determining factor of your ultimate decision?
41.1%I choose the diapers that came highly recommended by other moms.15.9%I choose the most affordable diapers I could find.14.5%I choose the diapers with the best online reviews.8.2%I sampled a few and found the ones that offered the best fit & function.7.6%I choose the diapers that we available to me locally.
Of the following options, which is your favorite type of cloth diaper?
38.9%Sleeve (pocket) diapers26.9%Prefolds & Covers15.6%Fitteds & Covers12.7%All-in-Ones5.8%All-in-Twos (insert and wrap combo)

the savings
Your baby will go through an astonishing 8000 diaper changes from birth to potty. Choosing disposable diapers and wipes will add up to an average of $2500. In contrast, by purchasing reusable baby Cloth Diapers and wipes, a family can actually save up to $2000! Translating this saving into earnings, one can assume you will spend a total of 115 hours laundering your reusable diapers. In this scenario, you will actually earn in savings an hourly wage of $15 an hour in the time spent laundering your baby's reusable diapers!

baby's 1st carbon footsteps
Sixty times more solid waste and twenty times more raw materials, like crude oil and wood pulp, are used in the manufacturing of disposable diapers. In fact, 25 million trees are consumed and manufactured into baby diapers each year! As the third largest contributor to our landfills, all the toss-away diapers of today will still remain in tact 500 years from now.

for the health of it
Less than one half of 1% of people follow the fine print guidelines on their disposable diaper package: "IMPORTANT: Shake baby soil into toilet." Raw sewage that is tossed into our landfills contaminates our water supply and breeds viruses and bacteria that are then spread to humans by insects.

for the health of your baby
Disposable diapers contain various toxins such as Tributyltin, Sodium Polyacrylate, and trace amounts of Dioxin. Your baby's delicate skin functions as a sponge and what we put on it goes in it. Harmful toxins can be avoided by choosing Cloth Diapers and accessories. Disposables are also a strong contributor to baby diaper rash. Before the use of rubber pants and plastic diapers diaper rash was almost unheard of. Diaper rashes can be caused by many reasons, but the most common cause is excessive moisture against the skin. Many of cloth diaper products are topped with a high tech sports fleece that actually wicks moisture away from your baby's bum and acts as a barrier to the wetness.

make a statement
Gone are the days of bland diapers... Cloth Diapers are available in over a dozen fun colors and several adorable prints. Our reusable diapers will turn some heads and fashionably compliment your baby's style. Sturdy and easy to use closures make our cloth diapers convenient for everyone!Why

To order for Alvababy reusable diapers in Nigeria at a wholesale price call +234(0)818-441-7142, 0802-301-0608

Pls find a helpful information on www.pandctimes.org/insights/tactics-how-to/1627-how-to-love-when-you-dont-feel-love-anymore. I hope it will help us so much. Thanks