₦airaland Forum

2buff:
@ poster,

One of the benefits requirements of being a man is the innate ability to think on things not only with the heart, but with the head.
If a man were to make all his decisions based purely on emotions, barring logic, well . . . let's just say he'll be pretty fucced up.

Of course your heart is all like: "I nuff her so I'll put up with the crap she has created for herself, climb 7 mountains and swim 7 seas and 1 lava pit. . ." etc, but that is where the head should come in and tell you that this girl didn't see you before  for YEARS giving herself to other men. It is only when she had belle and felt she needed an anchor (which you have been to her all your life) that she finally noticed you, and the only way to use you again in this case is to marry you so you can take care of her children for her. So essentially, telling you that you weren't good enough for her then, but now she's all used and knocked up and discarded, this is the version of her that you deserve.

Your head should come in and ask you, "is this what YOU deserve"?
If the answer to that question is YES, then na your own be that. If it is NO, you're gonna have to grab your nuts, man up, and excuse yourself from the unnecessary lifetime drama you're about to plunge yourself into.

And this is a YES or NO question. You cannot escape this question. It will always come up if you answer MAYBE and keep on going with the flow.

Judge your emotions, my friend, and do not let it run your life. Otherwise, you quickly become mad.

2buff:
I understand what you're saying, and from your previous post.
But it seems like you, like the poster, have also have placed yourself in a state of emotional bondage because of this other human being.
It's called a soul tie, and yes, it can be broken, just like any other addicition can be broken given the proper therapy.

The therapy, in both your cases is (again) simple, GET OUT MORE. Meet new women.
You obviously loved some qualities about her. Well fine, now you know what works for you/turns you on.
You can now add that to your list of things you would like in your future woman and continue your search. It's that easy.
When you do this, you'll soon see that in a week you could easily meet 5 other girls who have those exact same qualities or even beautiful variations of those qualities.
At that point you'll start asking yourself why you allowed yourself to act like such a depressed desperate f00l all those years.



TO GET OUT IS NOT THE ISSUE, BUT I NEED TO GET OUT IN GOOD ENVIRONMENT, MAJORITY OF GIRLS (AFRICAN) HERE CAN NOT BE DIFFERENTIATE FROM HOOKER, SO IT IS A DIFFICULT SITUATIONS TO JUST START NEW RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM IT MIGHT BE FROM FRYING PAN TO FIRE, AND ALL MY LIFE I STILL DREAM TO MARRY AFRICAN.
I'm not just writing this because I'm trying to be hard, this is all from experience. I've been there (in my dumber teenage days), but it's something you're gonna have to pull yourself out of, shake off the mud, and aim for the best in your life.

Macgreat:
@poster, Why wait all those year and be FED UP in the end.



YOU STARTED THIS COS YOU NOW FEEL YOU WASTED ALL THOSE YEARS. . .

Is better you move on. . . seeing her with some other guys over the years still you stood. . . You do love her but as a friend. now that she has accepted your proposer, you feel left out because she has had fun, explored several option before settle for less( YOU ).

You better not go ahead with it because you will definitely CHEAT on her.

martyns303:
@lovejo. Seriously! I feel your pain mate, i've been there, i even talked abt it here, d topic of d thread is ''my girlfriend who i love sooo much dumped me for a guy who is more having'' i talked abt how i'd dated dis gurl 4 like 4yrs, we never had s.ex cos she said she is a virgin n dat she intend to celibate till certain period, i loved her soo much, i respected her decision. I tot i was going 2 die wen she left me. I still think abt her, i made a promise 2 always love her(i still do) i also had a topic here ''unconsciously obsessed'' i talked abt how i still think abt her. I can't stand seeing her. Am paying 150g for accomodation when my grand mom(late) owns a 3bedroom flat in an estate thats wasting away, why? Cos this girl stays in d opposite lane and i can't stand seeing her. I'd neva in my life loved sum1 dat much and i prabably will neva again.
@190. I was shocked abt your phrase ''because of woman'' love is a very strong feeling.

Inked_Nerd:
Is she African as well?

Inked_Nerd:

Huh? So you would marry a white woman with three kids just for the sake of papers? And what if the woman was black and had three kids? Just wondering?

Inked_Nerd:
lovejo, if you love her and can accept the fact that she's carrying someone else's child then its ok. Go for it. Don't let people's judgement deter you from being with her.

--190--:

Your fiancee
Cheated on you, and is now pregnant wiv someone else child
You should be HAPPY, what if u married her and she cheated wiv her ex
You would have been FED DOWN abi?

--190--:
Thanks 4 your response,In as much as you really love this gurl in question

cash is not your problem,what happened that u failed to nail her during that 17yr period?

You both were together,she is gone and gone for good man, I believe u said shes now preg wiv someone else's preg!

Thats how life is, Now tell yourself this,

That everything happened so u can get your REAL WIFE which God purposely created for u,

she was never meant to be urs and thats why u lost her,

what would be urs would be urs,

even the next shoe u are gonna buy tomorrow,

has already been priced by several other men but God has destined that shoe 2 be urs

thats how this life is,use your head man, Money aint your problem, u can easily get someone else

and get married 2 her,after all people date and get wedded within 6months, u can too,

--190--:
and u learn to read meaning to things properly too

u kan get fed up wiv anything But NOT LIFE, (YOUR LIFE)

Goosh https://yoursmiles.org/tsmile/rtfm/t1929.gif

--190--:
^^

Teacher Steve

How can someone look @ his life and be FED UP with it  

Cos of woman! (shakes head)

--190--:
So because of a lady you are now on self destruct and u wanna commit suicide cos of it

well maybe u are broke ( I mean balantly broke ) thats why u were not considered

No insult intended but if u have issues wiv her and she refused 2 settle down with u

then pick up your broken heart (mend it 2gether) and go back 2 and look for someone (in the streets)

if u dont see any, go back to the village (them many full Village!)

durojim:
Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 1 Cor 6:18
Deut 22: 13-21
“Suppose a man marries a woman, but after sleeping with her, he turns against her and publicly accuses her of shameful conduct, saying, ‘When I married this woman, I discovered she was not a virgin.’ Then the woman’s father and mother must bring the proof of her virginity to the elders as they hold court at the town gate. Her father must say to them, ‘I gave my daughter to this man to be his wife, and now he has turned against her. He has accused her of shameful conduct, saying, “I discovered that your daughter was not a virgin.” But here is the proof of my daughter’s virginity.’ Then they must spread her bed sheet before the elders. The elders must then take the man and punish him. They must also fine him 100 pieces of silver,[b]  which he must pay to the woman’s father because he publicly accused a virgin of Israel of shameful conduct. The woman will then remain the man’s wife, and he may never divorce her.
“But suppose the man’s accusations are true, and he can show that she was not a virgin. The woman must be taken to the door of her father’s home, and there the men of the town must stone her to death, for she has committed a disgraceful crime in Israel by being promiscuous while living in her parents’ home. In this way, you will purge this evil from among you.

KunleOshob:
Obviously a lot of of people who are posting on this thread are not privy to the background to it so i would just ignore their daft comments. That apart a lot of people might feel offended that i ridiculed a lot of "church" doctrines here, i have no aplogies either cos the doctrines i ridicled are man made doctrines that have been twisted and presented as the word of God. If the clergy had been upright and going about it's calling based on the true and undiluted bible based teachings the issue of ridicling these false teachings would not even arise. It would also serve to make other christians realize that these are false and ridiculous teachings being perpetuatd by men for their own selfish reasons and not necessarily the word of God. How many of these pastors genuinely use these church collections to do God's work? and what exactly is God's work? i know it is definitely not building churches up and down or spreading the brand name of a particular church franchise, it is more of helping the poor and the needy and very few churches actually engage in this. And to those who fret any time they hear the word pastor mentioned, my question is this who annointed those men as pastors and how do you know they are genuine? There is only one biblically recommended way and that is by the fruits they exhibit. so if any man who claims to be a pastor is exhibiting fruits contrary to what was taught by Jesus i can feel free to ridicle such a person or doctrine knowing fully well that such a person is not known to christ. Jesus himself said that "not all that call him lord [even those who do miracles in his name] shall enter the kingdom of God but only those who do the will of the father.

KunleOshob:
Obviously a lot of of people who are posting on this thread are not privy to the background to it so i would just ignore their daft comments. That apart a lot of people might feel offended that i ridiculed a lot of "church" doctrines here, i have no aplogies either cos the doctrines i ridicled are man made doctrines that have been twisted and presented as the word of God. If the clergy had been upright and going about it's calling based on the true and undiluted bible based teachings the issue of ridicling these false teachings would not even arise. It would also serve to make other christians realize that these are false and ridiculous teachings being perpetuatd by men for their own selfish reasons and not necessarily the word of God. How many of these pastors genuinely use these church collections to do God's work? and what exactly is God's work? i know it is definitely not building churches up and down or spreading the brand name of a particular church franchise, it is more of helping the poor and the needy and very few churches actually engage in this. And to those who fret any time they hear the word pastor mentioned, my question is this who annointed those men as pastors and how do you know they are genuine? There is only one biblically recommended way and that is by the fruits they exhibit. so if any man who claims to be a pastor is exhibiting fruits contrary to what was taught by Jesus i can feel free to ridicle such a person or doctrine knowing fully well that such a person is not known to christ. Jesus himself said that "not all that call him lord [even those who do miracles in his name] shall enter the kingdom of God but only those who do the will of the father.

lovejo:
WHO ARE WE TO JUDGE THE ANOINTED MAN  OF GOD.  WHEN GOD WILL BE DEALING WITH THEM NO ONE WILL KNOW AND I HAVE NEVER SEE A CANAL MAN THAT CAN JUDGE PERFECTLY.
IT IS NOT FUNNY, JUDGE NOT SO YOU WON'T BE JUDGE.

EVERYONES ONE KNOW MAKING HEAVEN IS NOT BY BEING A PASTOR, IT IS ONLY FOR REPENTED SINNERS.

jagunlabi:
On NL religion forum, we touch and kick them around like no man's business, and we are neither careful nor apprehensive when we do so.