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Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 11:43pm On Nov 25, 2012
Now that Gudit is not here, what should Mavia do? Hmmmm
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 11:14pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:

no educational institution or any company at all employs people without referees as to your good behavior and character. with the level and standard of interviews given before employment, i doubt a teen mom can gain employment as a teacher without qualifications.
Really? Can you prove this? What about Corp Members that were posted to school during the service year? Can you vouch for their good behaviour and character too? Do they have good referees too? There are lots of teachers who are not qualified to do their jobs. This is a known fact. If you want details, i'm ready to give you details with official records and evidences.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 10:46pm On Nov 25, 2012
Cuddlemii:

Ok, noted. Some debaters also sent me an email about having a busy day tomorrow.
We will collate the scores from the judges while the discussion still continues. Thanks!
In that case, can the debaters continue their discussions. I mean Gudit and Mavia1?
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 10:38pm On Nov 25, 2012
Sisi_Kill:
So what do we call her and who should be responsible for her child's upbringing?
I call her "fertilization tunnel." Pardon my choice of word. However, her parents should be questioned. She is still a child not ready for responsibilities. We have foster parents, they could assist her in training her child on Sex Education, or perhaps the teenager's parents. I advice her on good authority not to rely or depend on the teachers (that's if the child has access to basic education), or the government (not with the epileptic state of most of our schools), or the media. If she can't take responsibility, let those that are responsible for her take up her responsibility, for they are linked together.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 10:24pm On Nov 25, 2012
Sisi_Kill:
Mavia1, studies have shown that not all adults who have babies are ready to be a parent. . . not to talk of a teenager. If she knew what she was doing, she won't be pregnant at 16. Won't we be indirectly asking for the circle ignorance to continue if we left the upbringing of her child to her alone?
If she can't bring up the child, then she is not qualified to be referred to as a parent, according to the definition of parent i gave. I was trying to prove to Gudit that the only way she could refer to the 16-year-old as a parent is if she fulfilled the condition of bringing up her child.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:50pm On Nov 25, 2012
Well, Gudit, you've raised lots of points and lots of questions that time could not permit me to answer all. I'm sorry about this. However, no matter what a teacher does or does not do, the parent is at the central part of a child and is therefore responsible for anything that pertains to the child, especially Sex Education. This goes for media and government as well. Thank you.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:47pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:
If you would teach and understand her better, why send her to school to learn biology and anatomy when you are quite familiar with the female anatomy yourself?
Biology? Anatomy? We've had these subjects for ages, yet cases of rape, abortion, incest, etc. are on the increase. Obviously, these subjects have not helped in anyway. Even if you bring a living human being to a laboratory and carefully analyze all the sexual organs, if the parents do not teach their children through life experiences they've had and through the full development of their brains, the teachers work in vain.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:43pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit: .
Don't categorise. They are all parents. there is nothing like sane or insane parents. once you are a parent, nobody wants to know if you are sane or insane
Just the same way we have good teachers and bad teachers
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:41pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit: let me help you understand why parents would trust a teacher: it is because they have one through years of training on how to understand children. the parents themselves were taught by teachers. everybody passed through a teacher. the president passed through a teacher. the doctor passed through a teacher. Obama passed through a teacher. we are all able to type here because our various teachers did their jobs.
I disagree. I am here because of what my parents did. They empowered my teachers. How did everybody get to the stage of having a teacher? Weren't they given birth to or trained by someone? Their parents.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:39pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:
Why do you think that in most schools, teachers are 2 in a class? and this teachers are of both sexes. one for the males, another for the females because Teachers are trained to deal with this issues. What do you expect of a father in a polygamous setting? If you cannot expect a trained and paid teacher to monitor 25 kids how do you expect a single polygamous father who is who is untrained to monitor his kids?
Did you say MOST schools have two teachers in a class? I bet you mean some private schools. I've visited schools with about 52 students to just a teacher, and God help the students if the teacher is the aggressive type. The few schools i've seen with 2 teachers in a class are top private schools. I know this because i've been a part an inspection on Nigerian schools. Even the one with 25 students to 2 teachers are still struggling to understand all of them because they have different learning styles and diverse issues from home. This is where Differentiation comes in, of which many teachers are not even passionate enough to listen or understand these children. This is why every parent should be held responsible for Sex Education. The child is theirs and even answer their names, not the teacher's name. Again, i blame the parents. Moreover, a father does not need Formal training before he can raise his own son? He has enough experience, etc.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:29pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:

that is why they are to blame! it is disheartening to know that the people entrusted with the responsibility of educating this children about evil also partake in it.
If only parents cared enough about their children...This is why a child should be free to report cases of suspected sexual activities by teachers to their parents. I don't understand why parents would trust a teacher. You are the parent. He/she is your child. Your blood. Your pride. Your future. Your investment. Your product. Your baby. Your joy. Your heart. Your everything. Why should you trust a teacher with this precious gift? Teachers should be monitored by parents. It is not the teacher's fault, it is because you (parent) have decided to close your eyes.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:23pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:
The teachers are employed by the government and the government has control over the media. There is a link between these three. Teachers have meetings with the government over educational issues. Parents DON'T!
Who pays the teachers? Parents. Who pays the government (taxes)? Parents. I wish i could insert a mind map here. If you remove parents from this link, do you think teachers or the government can stand well? Parents are the pillars that hold these two together. Their roles cannot be neglected as regards Sex Education
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:19pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:
If the parents don't go out to search for money, how do you expect them to provide the basic needs of a child such as food, education? Of what use is intimate education to a hungry, malnourished and uneducated child?
Note, i said "primary responsibility". Do i neglect my child because i want to provide her with food or education? No. The life of a child is nothing compared with the wealth or fame i could gather in a lifetime. Of course, the parents should work, but never place your work above your children. There should be checks and balances. Limits should be defined. I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth but the values instilled in me by my parents is the driving force behind my success and moral sanity. Have you heard of Home School? If a parent cannot train a child in school and the government does not make provisions, keep your child in your home and train him/her well. You don't need lots of money to do that.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 9:08pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit, could you please repost the rebuttals? I'm finding it difficult to quote or edit the one you posted earlier. Thanks.
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 8:40pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit: that is why i said"mandated" i never said that they all complied with that mandate.
Oh yes. I agree with you. In cases where everybody could not comply with the mandate, who educates the child that could not get into school on sexual activities and the harms associated with it?
This is my final question. Thank you
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 8:36pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:

A parent as defined by the Macmillian English Dictionary is a father or a mother. A father or a mother as defined by that same dictionary is a male or female parent. Looking at this definition, it can be seen that there is no special qualification needed to become a parent save for giving birth to a child. Therefore, what do we say about a 16 year old girl who by virtue of having given birth to a child is called a parent? Do we really think that she is well equipped to teach her child about sex? Having made the same mistake?

According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, a parent is one who brings up and cares for another. In respect of this definition, if the 16-year-old could comfortable bring up and care for a child, i believe she is well-equipped to educate her child about sex. The only factor that could disqualify her is the inability to bring the child up reasonably. Don't you think her age does not really matter in this case? Don't you think she could be matured and strong enough to teach her child not to make the same mistakes she made?
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 8:27pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:

The society today seems to leave the whole training of the child to the parents forgetting that the child plays a major role in the society and may either impact positively or negatively. It was with this in mind that the goverment mandated that all children should be sent to school. It was also with this in mind that the American government under the leadership of President Reagan in 1981 passed the AFLA a bill passed to encourage the teaching of sex education in schools.

Pray tell me, is there a country in the world that has all her children in schools? Is that attainable? What is the fate on those that could not get into school? Are they excused form learning the basics of Sex Education? Do we blame the teachers for those that couldn't get into school too? Or are there exceptions?
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 8:20pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:
In conclusion, a brief look at the history of sex education shows that it was the inability of the parents to handle this role well that government introduced sex education in schools. According to the Kaiser report, 65 percent of parents believe that sex education should be taught in schools. If the parents felt they were well equipped to handle sexual issues themselves, they would not encourage sex education to be taught in schools.

Does this mean you agree that parents have failed in their responsibilities as regards Sex Education?
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 8:15pm On Nov 25, 2012
Gudit:
Furthermore, most parents feel uncomfortable talking about this issues with their kids.


Why do you think they feel uncomfortable?
Literature / Re: Who Is To Blame When A Child Has Sex Without Proper Knowledge - Live Debate by Mavia1: 6:38pm On Nov 25, 2012
There was a young girl of 9 who confided in me on how she was abused by her uncle who was living with them. I encouraged her to tell her parents about it. After much persuasion, she agreed. The parents signed her up for deliverance in the church, thinking she was possessed. After a while, she took in for her uncle and almost committed suicide. I didn’t hear from her for a long time. A pretty smart girl with a tainted future and emotional trauma. If only her parents had done something different.

Good evening Nairalanders, judges, fellow debaters and the audience. My name is Mavia One. I’m here to convince you and support the resolution that the PARENTS, not the media or teachers, are to blame when a child engages in sexual activities without the right knowledge about harms associated with it.
According to Merriam-Webster dictionary, a Parent is one that begets or brings forth offspring; a person who brings up and cares for another.
Who brings forth a child? Parent? Media? Teachers? Yes, the parent. Whose name do these children bear? Of course, their parents’. Who leads them to the teachers or media? THE PARENTS. The first set of people a child, under normal circumstances, meets and interacts with is the parent.
Where are the parents? They have left their primary responsibility in search of money, pleasure, fame, etc. Who are they working for? They usually claim it is for the sake of their children.

Who can control the media, the teachers? No!
Teachers have also been caught to violate children. What about that?
Teachers are NOT magicians. They are not omnipresent or omniscient. They have about 25 students they deal with. Some schools even have about 40 pupils or more in a class. Do you really expect a single teacher to monitor the sexual activities of 40 children? Common, let’s be realistic. Will the teacher be efficient? No. As a parent, you have less than 25 children to deal with and you still want to pass the bulk of the blame on the teachers? Doesn’t it sound ridiculous to you?

Take for instance, if I had a cute little girl- my daughter, I would give anything to make her happy and live a good life. I would be passionate about her. I wouldn’t want her to be misled or molested. She would be mine. I would have great interest in her. However, if she had a teacher she loved as well- a wonderful teacher. The teacher wouldn’t be as passionate about her future and sexual activities as I would, because she is my daughter and I would know, love and understand her better.

Parents (the sane ones), cannot violate their children. I’m sure we can trust them more. Unfortunately, we don’t even know where they are. Do we still have parents? I mean parents, not fertilization tunnels. I blame them for their child’s sexual illiteracy for the following reasons:
1. They are not just related to these children by blood, but they are the first set of people the children, under normal circumstances, connect with. These children are from them, their fluid. Who else could understand the “fluid” better, than the “owner?”
2. They have the power and right to control the teacher and the media when it comes to matters relating to their child or children. The major responsibility lies on the parents, while they share a minor percentage with the teacher(s). The child leaves home for school and still comes back home to watch TV and read magazines. You only get educational materials in school from teachers, not movies, porn magazines, social forum, etc. So why blame the teachers?
3. The child spends more leisure time at home, or away from school, especially on weekends. Free access to the internet, TV, magazines, etc. the teacher will not come from school to control the media access at home. We have Parental Controls on satellite TV networks, but have you ever heard of Teacher Controls? Even the media acknowledges the fact that the onus of the control lies with the parents.
4. When a child turns out well, the praise goes to the parents. We hear phrases like: “Oh…she is from a good home, you can marry her” “His father trained him well” “He has wonderful parents” etc. So also, when a child misuses his/her sexual ‘strengths’, the blame goes to the parents. If you want to take the praise, you must be ready to take the blame.

I’ve had opportunities to work with children for years, and I’ve come to realize that at ages 1-3, they tend to dance to interesting tunes that catch their attention. You can manipulate them easily. They are very vulnerable. “This is when we need you parents, not when we’ve started growing baby beards.”
Most teenagers that have had sex one point or the other in their lives would have chosen differently if they had answers to the questions they couldn’t ask. Most girls will not even discuss their Menstrual Cycle with their mothers; neither will most of the boys discuss Wet Dreams or their crush with girls, with their fathers. This is because our parents have given us the impression that “Sex Education” is a very sacred topic that should not be discussed in the homes.
Teri Hatcher, a celebrity, was raped by a family member when she was just a child. Her uncle raped her for several years starting when she was just five years old. Pray tell me, do we blame her school teacher for this or the media? Where was her mother or father?
I say that parents are responsible for their children’s welfare and Sex Education, not the teachers or the media.
Thank you.

Reference:
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