Yes oYes o

C
H
E
C
K





MY






SIGNATURE




You are invited to join this amazing Whatsapp group for teaching on relationships based on biblical principles.

God's way is the only way to true happiness, peace and fulfillment.

The most important thing is our soul don't let the worldly pattern offer us what could cost us our souls.

The link is in the signature or contact 08120136979

https://www.nairaland.com/5893660/christian-how-define-dating

Yes o

Yes o

C
H
E
C
K





MY






SIGNATURE




You are invited to join this amazing Whatsapp group for teaching on relationships based on biblical principles.

God's way is the only way to true happiness, peace and fulfillment.

The most important thing is our soul don't let the worldly pattern offer us what could cost us our souls.

The link is in the signature or contact 08120136979

https://www.nairaland.com/5893660/christian-how-define-dating

How do you define Dating?
The Autonomy

Some common questions are "Where is dating in the scripture?" "Did the bible mention dating?" "Should Christians date?" Some may even ask, if yes Can we date unbelievers?.

But should you? What benefit would that be?

The Bible acknowledges a few relational categories. The first distinction lies between those who trust in Jesus Christ and those who do not. The Bible is very clear here: you do not date across these lines because you have different allegiances and different directions.

Now, there are many verses in the Bible concerning how the people of Jesus are meant to reach out relationally across that boundary. We love those who do not believe. We extend kindness and generosity across that boundary. Our primary goal in those exchanges is to do all we can to help them see, understand, desire, and embrace an eternal relationship with God, not a romantic relationship with us.

If you define dating as spending time to get to know someone then before you date anyone you ask them have you dated God?


There is also a significant divide within the community of Jesus. When you come to faith in Jesus, you not only begin a new relationship with God as a father but also gain all other believers as brothers and sisters. We are part of a family. There are a host of Bible verses concerning how we are to treat members of this community—especially in the book of Ephesians.


When you cross the line of entering a covenant of marriage with one person until death do you part, you enter into a narrower circle with just the two of you.

Now there are another set of Bible verses concerning how you are to treat that one person. When you step into a covenant together, a whole world of privileges and responsibilities open up to you that should not be a part of your relationship with a brother or sister in Christ.

But here is where the problem lies: in our culture today, we want to create a separate, interim category called “we’re dating.” We want to enter a sphere entitled “boyfriend and girlfriend.”

What we try to communicate when we announce those labels is, “We are not just brother and sister; we want to be more than that. But we are not married. We do not want to take on all of that weight. We are something else—a hybrid—that gives us certain
responsibilities and affords us certain privileges—like sex.”


When you create this separate category, the question immediately rises,
“What are the rules?”

As we try to enter the sphere of dating someone, we tend to bump into the “rules” as the other person understands them. You can usually spot them in statements that include the phrase “supposed to.”

Example:
“Hey, why didn’t you text me today?”
“What? Uh, I don’t know.”
“You’re supposed to text me.”
“I’m supposed to? I didn’t know that.”
“Yeah, you’re my boyfriend. You are supposed to text me every day.”
Or, “Hey, are we going out tonight?”
“Well, no. I’m going out with my girlfriends.”
“What? Why didn’t you make plans with me? I thought we were supposed to hang out on weekends.”
“So, I am supposed to check with you first?”
“Well, yeah. I’m your boyfriend.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know that ‘rule.’”
Or some become overprotective:
"Who was that lady you were laughing with?"
"Are you my wife?"
"Who was that man that gave you a ride?"
"Are you my husband, that I should explain myself to?"

Then one person gets defensive and hurt. The other feels the need to apologize, but isn’t entirely sure what line they crossed.

What is going on here? We are bumping into a new set of responsibilities because of moving into the culturally created sphere of boyfriend and girlfriend. Each person is establishing a law—an official code of conduct for the boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.

The same thing happens with privileges: He is my boyfriend I think it's right to know his size or if he is sexually active, he should get me a new phone, or give me money for something. She is my girlfriend I have a right to her nude pictures or receive sexual favors from her without any marital commitment etc.

We create this new sphere and we put into it certain responsibilities and privileges.

There’s only one problem: God does not recognize this status. You are either brother and sister or you are husband and wife

There is no intermediate sphere. This is where so many young people get confused.
We make dating a status rather than a process. If I can just enter this status, I get certain responsibilities and certain privileges. I can hang in this zone for a while,
enjoying as many of the perks as I can while holding off the harsher responsibilities of marriage. Because Facebook makes dating a status doesn't mean the bible does.

It sounds like a sweet deal, yet this is where so many get hurt.
This is where so many questions arise.
We are trying to create a way of relating outside of God’s economy, and we are finding that it does not work very well...

The world defines dating as a status where you can decide if this person is worth marrying or not, that is why many face so much pressure inside and feel worthless when they break up.

While we can use scripture to define dating as a process of confirmation and evaluation for the purpose of courting then marriage. Even if you felt led to a person as a potential future partner and spouse, you need to confirm such leading. And as a child of God the process of evaluation like performed by Eliezer was one of observation with the purpose of marriage.

The goal of dating is not to make someone conform to a standard you have imposed. It is to assess what kind of person he or she is and discern whether or not the two of you are a fit.

Someone will ask me, “I’ve been dating this girl for a while and I think she should start going to church with me now. How do I tell her that she’s supposed to do that?”
Supposed to?
I have no idea where it is written that she has to go to church with you.
If she (or he) has no interest in getting involved at church, then that is a helpful piece of information in your evaluation. That won’t suddenly change if you get married. But if you are not her husband, she has no obligation at all to follow you anywhere. Her life is
her own. She can go to whatever church she wants. Now, if you get married,
you two will need to work that out together. But there are no biblical obligations for a status called dating. because dating isn't a place to linger in, dating is not an aim but a process.

No matter how long you've been dating it is not marriage and doesn't give you a right to marital privilege. A dating relationship, no matter how long it may have gone on,
can be dissolved in an hour.

So if someone is saying to you, “I want the privilege of access to your body, but I don’t want the responsibility of loving and caring for you forever,” that is not a covenantal love.

Recall the previous teaching posts on difference between love and infatuation; True love does not request access to your body while simultaneously avoiding any responsibility to care for you emotionally and financially.

Try to make it sound as romantic as you want, but it is a selfish endeavor and God does not acknowledge it as honorable.

In marriage the two become one, until that covenant happens, you are still two. You are separate. That means there is a measure of separation in your decisions and that should be respected. You are accountable before God for your own life.

When someone says to me, “I have been talking with this girl for a while. We’re trying to figure out when to make it official, like, Facebook official. What’s your advice?”

I always ask in response, “Are you, as an individual, in an emotional, spiritual, and financial situation where you feel you could reasonably get married in the next six months?” Normally the guy answers,
“No.”
I respond, “Then you do not need to be in a rush to try to lay some claim on this girl.

You do not need to expedite attempting to name your relationship. Because what you are trying to do is get the security and comfort of locking her down, saying to the world, ‘She is MY girlfriend.’ But what does that mean?

It means other guys can’t have her. It means you have laid a certain claim on her.

But under God, you have no rights over her! She
can do whatever she wants!”

Dating is not a way of maximizing benefits and minimizing obligations.

It is not romantic to waste each other’s time. Date to evaluate, and evaluate as
quickly as you can but as long as it takes.

Now, for those of you thinking, Oh no, I already have a boyfriend. Or, I have a girlfriend. We are going to have to break up now. Let me say that I honestly do not care if you use the word boyfriend or girlfriend. What I do care deeply about is what you mean when you say those words.

Be honest with yourself and with each other. If by boyfriend or girlfriend you mean,
“This buys me certain privileges and access to this person,” then I am telling you, it does not. Not under God.

So you can use the terms boyfriend and girlfriend. But make sure as you do, you keep in mind, and remind each other, “I have no right to this person’s body. I have no claim on this person’s life.

This person is not mine.

She is a daughter of God and my sister in Jesus and I will treat her as such. He is a son of God and my brother in Jesus and I will treat him as such.”

This might have be long but the wisdom that has been poured into this is for your soul's sake and not for anyone's sexual satisfaction. I am sure you reaching this point of the post that your heart has been touched.

So stay safe and remain blessed.

mignone:
The link isn't going through.

08120136979 let me add you

You are invited to Join this amazing Whatsapp Relationship Teaching Group for children of God

https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

C
H
E
C
K




M
Y






SIGNATURE





Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group
https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

C




H



E


C


K



M Y












SIGNATURE

CAPSLOCKED:


THAT PERSON HAS HAD 7 FIANCES. LET'S NOT EVEN COUNT BOYFRIENDS, BUT SUCH A PERSON CAN ENTERTAIN DIVORCE 15 TIMES AND STILL NOT BE REASONABLE IN LIFE.

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group
https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a

Join Whatsapp Christian Relationship Teaching Group https:///F0qcyrzyf145p47B3k6W2a