I enjoy reading your poem jojo


Keep it up...and keep writting I will keep reading as much as i can

I like the poem and your careful description to whom the content refers to.


Good ,good,very good
Clap for your self.

**********
Love covers all
Love heals all
Was our slogan during those periods
We were envied by foes
Loved by friends
A day without the other
Is like eternity in hell
**********



I like this part .......I remember someone

Qaisar1:

Nice analysis. But,


Packed not bags
Just a short and a rag
They've been with me
Even before I became dark

That's was not a mistake though. When babies are born, they are born mostly with light/fair skins; and when they grow older, they grow darker. He's trying to stress the fact that;
* He has nothing else (his poor state)
* These clothes were childhood gifts
* The short and rag is as old as himself
..................................................

So I pushed a little further
Through lakes that conceived not waters
Into caves which were rocky freezers
Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter

While still with his family, he must (at some point) be fantasizing on how "the City" would favour him. He had hopes - those were his sweet dreams. But when reality struck, his dreams which were then - sweet; wasn't anymore.




Thanks

I hoped my explanation was correct to some extend?

This is a story

maiahsaiah:



(Whispers): not that kind of love, was talking bout agape love.

Thanks sweet

emaculate99:
BACKGROUND:

The justice system in the country is malled with a lot of regularities. Corruption has taken over the system and this has led to a lot miscarriages of justice. Corrupt leaders can easily escape its long hands because of the bias and corruption in the system.

You made front page am happy for you

maiahsaiah:



Wow...I loved all my literature teachers both male and female, can I love you too?

yes ma but am not homesexual sweetheart


Thanks

holyFRED:

If not for you,i for no know wetin i dey fine for this thread.

I'm not really a fan of poetry

Grazie
Thank you sir
The pleasure is all my

emaculate99:
seriously, Merit12 did a great job. I doffed my fila when I saw the analysis.

Doffe
Doffer
Doffest
Any other addiction to the above?if not I comment below

I doffest my Capello for you


Seriously,sincerity, am satisfied
I hoped to become better
Do all my assignment and read my book.

emaculate99:
Yeah, it is. The Lady I was in love with in Merit12's analysis is "the Nigerian justice system"... #kudos to you and Merit12 for the great analyses.

Oops

Well Am at my beginners stage ..
Am here to learn

Hope to become a better student
Thanks

donifez:
I love this...Merit did a good job too,Nice one Oga.

Thanks oga me.
Just following your foot step.

Yet again, another cold morning
Stretched hard and managed yawning
I was ready; for I've planned before today
To leave the slums already; if I didn't fail


This writer was prepared to leave home and look for better life .he had prepared for the next day finally the day had arrived, the feeling or mood of the writter is happy because the long expected days came.



Packed not bags
Just a short and a rag
They've been with me
Even before I became dark


He don't need much things just few things he own already short and rag
[color=#990000]The last line hereI think you made mistake

Even before it became dark as in night
.[/color]

Maybe I was selfish
Wanted a life for my sisters and mummy
But not here in the slums
All they do is nothing but dirty and fetish

He has hoped for good life for his family that's why he had to leave to get a better life for them.



It's two days
I've been walking and swearing
Couldn't pray? Yeah
Couldn't find my faith nor bearings

[color=#000099]The journey has obviously began .the mood of the writer change here to being sad ...regret is quietly setting in ,he get to point he could not found his Faith to pray[/color].


It is darker
The night, voraciously feeding on its victims
Was I mad? Was it hunger?
Or maybe I wasn't thinking
Should I retreat and forget 'The City'? 

In this part uses personification, (the art of describing non living things ,object with living things features for example the night voraciously = eagerly or devour.the night can't feed it has no mouth or teeth)it a way of saying the night is waiting for him to die I think now he is thinking of retreat which is going back home swearing and pharphs no more food.one the is regret is there

Thoughts came through, on and into my mind
But it couldn't be water nor food
Soon I'll go empty and dry, then die...
To or fro; either ways, 'twas mine to decide.


He thought of what he has left with him ,soon they become empty then he dies ..now he is thinking seriously to go home or still ahead

So I pushed a little further
Through lakes that conceived not waters
Into caves which were rocky freezers
Couldn't sleep - once sweet-dreams became bitter

with the strenght he went ahead with hopes ,he found a place and rest in cave which he found but could not sleep there it was drawn on him all his plans to have a good life by going to the city had failed . That's also personification dream cannot taste anything .dreams have no tongue to taste

With quivering knees
I went up there
Colourful skies, shadowed City;
Both, still not near
Could have gone for it
But my breath was leaving me
Was not to blame death for helping me
Then I found faith; I prayed
A promise of blessings
All for my family
When I get home

He became cold ...he thought of the city he wanted to go though still not near him..he was dieing slowly is breath was leaving (once breath lives ones life it death .)he prayed .......he also thought proving for them or blessing them and making them happy once he get home (home there is not his real house were he left from he was indirectly saying when he get to hell ,heaven or dies finally .)


I hope my explanation is correct according to understanding ......it same thing with our youth of these day going to lybia and crossing to Italy.going to Europe by foot .frist they wanted to make their family happy but during the journey death can also set in.

It not all that leaves home get to their destination it only few that makes it.


I like the poem and the lessons it teaches.

emaculate99:


No, you can't!
Your surveyed heart,
Your working hands,
Tears in eyes work,
Driblets of sweat on face,
Your labour reward aims he,
Your wages he wailed for.

Your head heavier with stress,
Whispers sound screeching air,
Your right must be yours,
The wailer can choose to moan.

You can't be cheated!

Watered down, his aim,
Desiccated, his wish,
Your reward thine it will,
Trust me and you will see.

Thanks it okey now

I will kiss you with the kisses of age,
Filled with French fantasies;
A lamina of Latin language,
With a cistern of English love,
And the saplings of truth.

This first lines means the writer is very happy with his new found love that's a hyperbole an exaggeration poetic device which is an overstatement.

Let me behold your blindness,
And protect your virginity,
Your sword sharpen will I,
And your laundry man, I will be,
With this, your scale will be balanced.

Still in his happy state ready to do anything for the fondness and love he has found still using hyperbole. ..blindness can't be hold neither virginity can be protected ..laundry man and scale will be balanced represents he is ready to any thing for his love ..

Your temple will I clean,
The “minister of truth,” my aim,
So that the saplings will grow,
And the sword of justice be safe.

Also this is hyperbole also using metaphor.cool

But now, my love is in shackles,
My truths are now lies,
My holiness is dizziness,
My tears are changeless,
And my hope is hopeless.

Now the mood of the writter has changed to sad state he seem hurt and betrayed.he is expressing how he felt now discovering using shackles lies dizziness change less hopeless this are sad words.truly hurt metaphor he uses very well when you using a word to compair other but not using but as is a metaphor for example my holiness is dizziness it compare holiness to dizziness but didn't us as or Like .that's metaphor well done ..

My love has become hatred,
For my love can now see,
Her blindfolding, removed it is,
And her sword, slighted,
Her robe sowed with blood,
And her scale useless!

Placing her as virgin from the previous lines now he discover her clothes is not white now it stain meaning he though she was clean and holy but she is not .....maybe she has been pretending too to be perfect now the writer hate her more


Her temple, a brothel;
And a plague for righteousness,
The death of the truth saplings:
The fortress of the corrupt.

He goes as far to describe her as a prostitute. After the discovering it really hurting when you think some one is perfect good and all that and later discover she was just pretending

Something as perfect as our leader that we think they are ready to obtain justic for us are prostituting (by taking money and giving people favour )the sword of truth which stood for justice.
I hope my explanation is correct

Well done love this poem it opens my heart looking at it literally

I modify some part


©Emaculate Ife /quote]

[quote author=jaymejate post=41671830]

Do you expect me to start replying you, telling you who i am with a poem?
I'm not a poet [/ quote]- Am not a poet as well


Why then did you not mind your business?

jaymejate:


Ok congrats

congrats for what?
You have not answer my questions in my previous poem
Who do you think you are?

jaymejate:


Ok congrats

congrats for what?

DuchessLily:
Who is cheating u??

Nature?
Relationship? Or
Business ?

Thanks sweet it transactions
It okey now resolved ....
Get me really angry



Did you check my poem ?
What's your explaination

Ahhhhhhhh I scream
As a roaring lion,
Deep silent fell into me
Like a cold hand of ice,
Angry I become the more.

Dead silence on the other side
Of the phone ,
After brief talk on the
Angry I become the more .

My eyes widen
My tongue become bitter
My stomach hurts
My head become more heavier

The trees began
whispering Strange sound
Frowned confused tears
Rolled down from my eyes
I can't take it anymore I say
I can't be cheated over my labour
I can't be cheated from my right
Not even from HER My loveone
My calculations are right
That's my hard end right
No I can't be cheated

Qaisar1:


It's you Dj!

Yes boss