There is something really spectacular about beans; it's all encompassing, basically giving you everything you want in life. That is why the ones who
are wiser than us will say 'life is a pot of beans; here today, gone tomorrow'...
Gone tomorrow... like your girlfriend who freed you and went with a rich dude when her eyes got opened and she can see clearly that you don't have anything to offer her, both monetary and from your 'down below'. That is a girl you have sworn by your forefathers and ancestors that come eighty years from now, you will finally remember that you want to do the 'official' thing (pls don't ask me what that is). Meanwhile you don't have a job, only MMM; (MMM that freeze like Mannequin Challenge, is that one job?), yet you want to eat three square meals a day plus 'in-betweens' like fruits, snacks and even provisions, how Na? The whole thing is now on her neck like aftershave. Where should she get the money from? Where? You also cannot satisfy her with your rod or better still 'toothpick' and you don't want to learn. You get on her, stroke 1, stroke 2, stroke 3, and fiam! You are done. Who does that Really? And when she tells you of her inner pain, you in your self importance and stupidity will tell her she is nagging, that she should love you for who you are... my friend, who are you? When she now leaves you and goes after the rich dude, even offering to wash plate and do houegirl work there, you will start saying that women are the same crazy binshes who don't look at the bigger picture. My friend come hia! After the 'P' in Psychology, you are the most useless. Later you will say that 'life is a pot of beans; here today, gone tomorrow...

Gone tomorrow, like money these days. You get 1k by any means, fine barra or system barra or dash or anything, after buying #10 pure water, fiam! The money is gone with the wind... and you won't be able to account for what you bought with the money. After buying Orbit chingum (by the way, what is the difference between Orbit and Sprint chingum?) You find out that the money is remaining #100. That thing can pain ehn! And even to buy food sef is a chore, because if you are not kiaful, you will finish another 1k at Iya Biliki's place, because #200 rice looks like what a 2 year baby will finish. I cannot even eat my #50 ewa Agonyin in peace because ewa is now annoyingly expensive, bread is something else. #100 bread can't do sh*t! Which way?? And when, as a student in Awo, you cook your deliciously scented Portuguese beans that would send whoever eats it to the rest room in a hurry, (note, it's not toilet, please sound like you went to school for once), even if your entire digestive system is made of stone, if that does not happen, and you just make the mistake of going inside to get onions, you can be sure that your entire pot of beans will develop wings and fly away... one guy had his pot of beans pilfered by a headless thief one day in Awo, do you know what he did? He sat outside the hostel, dipped his hand in his anus and swore to high heavens for the thief. Before long, the thief started poopooing hot poopoo. He did it the first, second and third time. That was when we knew who stole from our friend. Of course he was given a very good beating by Awo boys, but that did not bring back his pot of beans which was here today and gone tomorrow...

Gone tomorrow, like the wind... thank God Mr President finally decided to bring back our harmattan today, after a very hot sun which was determined to destroy the ozone layer. In this situation, I can assure you that in the next 2 to 3 weeks,. We would be back to normal. I'm gonna advice you on what to do in this season of cold, cold and cold as usual, and I am going to borrow a line from. Eldee, (where is he anyway?) 'If you have a wife, hol am hol am, if you have a girl friend hol am hol am, and if Na somebody woman, tell then say Fi iyawo Oni iyawo sile' this is because this harmattan is a really special one, and it is a good one, so make the most of the situation and don't worry, by all means, pls enjoy yourself to the fullest. Go to anywhere they are doing party and please, party hard! Even where you are not invited, go there and turn up! (but if they bundle you out sha, it was nice meeting you). Eat all their food, finish their drinks, if you are still thirsty, ask for more, dance, dance, and dance again. Break a leg, because in the end, life is just a pot of beans, here today, gone tomorrow...




Visit missuskike..com.ng to read other Headless Tales

I got a text from them too. They said the interview is tomorrow. How can they fix an interview on vals day?? I called the number they dropped there it was a lady. She spoke to me in a way that the whole thing looks like fraud to me.

lalasticlala:
Recall that PDP recorded a landslide victory in Enugu.

See Patrick Obahiagbon's reaction on Twitter after the announcement of the results....


https://mobile.twitter.com/pobahiagbon

*sighs* Some things can never change

lalasticlala:



http://citypeoplegroup.org/i/online-outrage-trails-kemi-omololu-olunloyos-twitter-rants/

Kemi has not been in the news for sometime now. I guess the silence is killing her. that's why she is seeking for attention. I say everybody should ignore her. its a family affair.

icebebe:
chai! U gerrit! Ma tout exactly!

the lace is giving me life!!!!

Binotinto:
According to Punch, Seven year old Iretioluwa is like every other children, but what makes her different is her spiritual proclamations, which makes her an extra-human being. When Punch was invited by her parents saying “our daughter wants you”. It was like a call not too clear. But upon enquiry made by the editor of Punch, it was discovered that it was not just a call but a diving call that requires a diving response.

Ireti-Oluwa has become a friend of Jesus Christ upon whom she resides and proclaim messages for the world.“Most times Jesus Christ appears to her and tells her lots of things especially hidden things which He (Jesus) wants us to know” declares the mother.“But the most shocking of all she has been told is about men of God whom we reverence in this country and she told us to look for a Christian newspaper. In fact, she wrote the name of your magazine and we started looking for it” – the father cuts in.

We were ushered into the spacious living room of the Ifedayos when Iretioluwa was taking her breakfast. We waited for her to finish and we settled down for the business of the day. Iretioluwa, a primary three pupil was so bold as she declared what she said was told her by Jesus Christ.

According to her, my Lord and saviour saidi should declare to Pastor Adeboye of the Redeemed Christian Church of God that he cannot make heaven. Though he started very well in spite of his works, he has compromised.

“He has missed me a long time ago. I am only honouring my name in his life. He no longer has a place in me. Tell him to go back to his first love and drop every load of compromise he is carrying.

“Tell David Oyedepo that his hands are soiled with human blood. His name is not in the book of life. He has missed it a long time ago. Tell him what will profit him if he gains the whole world and end in Hell fire.

David Olukoya of Mountain of fire and miracles is encouraging evil and doesn’t want to repent. Tell him to stop living a double life. He knows the stones in his hands, tell him to drop them if he MUST enter heaven, he has to live a complete life of holiness.

Ayo Oritsejafor is not my servant. He has gone astray in the pursuit of fame, power, money. Warning to repent before he ends where his boss his.

T.B. Joshua is an advocate of Satan in Nigeria, he has sold his soul to the devil and he knows hell is awaiting him.

Christ Oyakhilome made a vow to Satan and he has succeeded to win souls for Satan. He is the front runner of the new age teachings in the world.

Many pastors that hoist flags of different churches know why they are doing so. Beware of such gathering.
Evil altar has reached an alarming rate in Nigeria.


http://www.naijaurban.com/top-nigerian-pastors-candidates-hell-fire-7rys-old-girl/

This is fulfilling what was written in the book of Joel....... The young ones seeing visions....... God is a great God!!!

Chartey:
Someone sent me this on WhatsApp

Lemme add some.
Jelili gerigeri
Shaki eleran igbe
Saidi foga
Yemi elemu oguro
Kososhi

Chartey:
Someone sent me this on WhatsApp

Lemme add some.
Jelili gerigeri
Shaki eleran igbe
Saidi foga
Yemi elemu oguro
Kososhi

Blanc8:
Ohh, sorry... So you were surrounded by all these people.. ? and you still stayed to finished the movie?
.. you another category of Nigerian...
I must finish my money

very correct. Guy why you no leave the cinema if they were that annoying?

MizzD:
The man is highly irresponsible, and this irresponsibility brought this child to the home of the wicked stepmum. How can he start the search of a new wife and step mum for his daughter barely months after his wife developed psychiatric problem? If the daughter just clocked 2, then he started the search for a new wife barely weeks after her delivery! And to think they met on facebook and then got her pregnant at first visit? And then he took his baby from a caretaker he was paying 12k to this heartless stepmum, someone he himself has never lived with. I'm quite sure he stupidly did that to save some bucks. The part that annoyed me most was when he saw blood shots and marks on the little girl and his common sense still did not tell him she was being maltreated in that environment and deserved to be taken away immediately. What an asshole of a father!

This christianah is very heartless and should be locked up.

You just said my mind. Irresponsible father and heartless step mum. The father himself should be punished a little. Now look at how they scarred that little angel. Mofos

Good luck Ebele Jonathan himself is a recycled politician. After spending 6 years as president he is campaigning for another 4 years. Pls someone should tell him that power is sweet; but when its too much it causes pile (what the Yoruba people call Jedi jedi)

You forgot to add 'Parle Soda'

iceberylin:
Bleaching

tops the list