₦airaland Forum

bukatyne:
Instead of telling your husband to stop 'spending on his family', point him to projects he can spend money on.

E.g. 'My friend said there is one cheap land at Igbo Tutu' or 'how I wish we had our house, we wouldn't be bothered about Baba Mulika asking for rent every year' or 'there is one mutual funds that the entry is N200k and you get 15% returns per year. We can be paying Junior's fees from the interest'. You can also bring up investment for your kids etc.

You know what works with your husband so explore that. Also appreciate him for what he does so far.

@buying your land: I am not a fan of spouses buying stuffs behind each other so I will say deposit the money in mutual benefit/Chapel Hill/Piggybank for now while you try to make him see reason. I particularly don't like the fact you want only your name on the land; recipe for disaster as your husband is not hiding his own funds; he is just not spending it wisely.

You should also understand where your husband is coming from: in some cultures, the 'worth' of the first son/husband of the first daughter is their ability to fund everyone's lifestyle without complaint while their own immediate family suffers.

It is a recurring theme so you re-orientate him in love and harmony to see that his family can and will survive without his handouts.

Also note that if he goes 360 and stops funding his siblings, it can cause problems for you'all.

safepaulooo:
The great multitude mentioned at Revelation 7:9 standing before the throne and before the lamb, are they also in heaven? To be spoken of as standing before the throne and before the lamb does not necessarily mean they are in heaven. A person can be on earth physically and be spoken of as standing before God and Jesus figuratively in the sense of receiving their approval or favor. Matthew 25:31, 32 says that “all the nations” – which will include the wicked will be gathered before Jesus on his glorious throne. But Jesus will be in heaven and these ones will be on earth because for sure the WICKED will not be in heaven. So all the nations being gathered before Jesus does not mean they will have to be in heaven. One does not have to be in heaven in order to be gathered before Jesus. The wicked who are part of ALL NATIONS will not need to be in heaven. They will be on earth physically but be gathered before Jesus (who will be in heaven) figuratively.

Secondly, Revelation 6: 15-17 shows that people on earth which will include kings, high officials, military commanders, the rich, the strong, the slave will seek to hide from the face of the one seated on the throne and from the wrath of the lamb, Jesus but will not be able to STAND. These ones of course will be on earth while God and Jesus are in heaven. They do not have to be in heaven physically to fulfill those words in Revelation 6:15-17. Their being unable to STAND figuratively before God means they fail to receive God’s approval. So even though they are on earth physically they fail to STAND before God and Jesus (who are in heaven) figuratively in the sense of failing to receive their APPROVAL.

So really Matthew 25:31, 32 and Revelation 6:15-17 helps us understand that one does not have to be in heaven literally in order to be spoken of as being gathered or standing before God and Jesus. However, take note of the difference between being GATHERED before the throne and STANDING before the throne. As used in those scriptures, those being GATHERED differ from those STANDING because the latter receive God’s approval. That is the situation with the great multitude of Revelation 7:9, they are spoken of as STANDING before God and Jesus meaning they are APPROVED. This though is what the persons spoken of in Revelation 6:15-17 fail to achieve.

So in summary, Revelation 7:9- 17 refers to a great multitude of faithful followers of Jesus who though are physically or literally on earth, STAND before God and Jesus figuratively in the sense that they receive his APPROVAL. They are the ones spoken of in Psalm 37:29 and Matthew 5:5, righteous ones who will live forever on a restored earthly paradise made possible by God’s Kingdom government comprised of Jesus and his 144,000 co-rulers.

noakchukibadan:
Hello,

Please no ethnic banters. One of us is from Ekiti, and the other is from Benue. I am married for 8 years with 2 kids. It has been one problem to another.

I must be very frank, before marriage, my wife had many very questionable characters, but unfortunately we did the marriage counseling in a church were the pastor happened to be her family member. Many of the issues would have been resolved, but when I raised those issues about her character the pastor promised me that everything will be fine after the marriage.
Although this is not an excuse, but looking back now I would have been more patient and taken my decision myself instead of rushing into the marriage. For this I HOLD MYSELF ACCOUNTABLE

There is hardly nothing we do not quarrel about, I have always been the one to initiate settlement. The only way I ensure that there is peace in the house is for me not to complain about anything. Even at that, there is always trouble. If the children do anything wrong, she always says those characters the children are exhibiting are not from her and that she is not surprised that they inherited such characters from me.

She can go for months without talking to me, even if I tried to, I have done all I could do, I have begged, cried prayed. I just feel tired and exhausted from trying to make the marriage work or have peace in the home, the sad part is that she often reminds me every time there is misunderstanding that I should remember that she can stay on her own without talking to any body. Just to add, she is very prayerful.

OTHER INFORMATION.
1. I can say conveniently that there is no money problem at home. Finance is okay.
2. I went to see her father 2 years ago, the man said unfortunately he can not do anything. This is true because she was raised away from her Father, she has no contact with any of her fathers family and her father has a zero say in her life.
3. she has 5 elders ones, non of them is in communication with her because of many unresolved issues. Of her 3 younger ones she only maintains a relationship with the last boy who is just 14 years. .
4. Her mum can not talk to her because she simply dares not. However, behind, her mother use to beg me and she kept saying she understands her daughter's character and that she is doing her best by praying and doing deliverance for her.
5. She is not in contact with her maternal uncles and aunt because she said they supported her elder ones when she had problem with them.

So I am stuck with no one to help call the both of us and resolve the issue.

Every year for 5 straight years, she always forgets my birthday, last year, she forgot also, three days later, she bought me a present and I refused to collect the present and I asked her why does she keep forgetting my birthday, year after year for 5 years. She just said sorry, but I left the present in the room, she never bothered to bring the present to me. Another birthday was gone yesterday 2nd May, and as I write, no happy birthday yet.

I literally cook for myself, and all domestic things I do for myself.

I will end this by saying that in fairness to her, her character was not too different before the marriage and courtship, sincerely only once, that was like one year before the marriage I broke up with her, she came to apologize and promised that she will change. Her mother also came to apologize to me also.

This woman has refused to change or allow peace to hold sway, she is right every time, while everybody around is wrong. Sincerely, I do not know what to do anymore.

I am tired and exhausted. I do not know what to do anymore. I am 42, I was diagnosed of high blood pressure 2 years ago.

Princewell2012:
Thank you. There was a time I wanted to flee my house because of fear. Lots of thoughts were going on in my mind weather to run or stay and face them.
I can't allow little children to rape my wife right before my face. so I have to join those boys outside to fight for my self. But my wife kicked against it, which nearly bring quarrel between us.

Jayjezey:
How can they apply it if they know nothing about it, it's u as a herbalist or a plant pathologist that should synthesize a herbal vaccine or cure and notify the public and health bodies concerned, these health bodies would give ur vaccine a clinical trial and if it's efficient, they'll implement it's usage.

So, synthesize it and notify the public

Jayjezey:
Synthesize a herbal cure and notify the public

crackland:
She is squatting and is a visitor, kill yourself if you don't like the sight of this fact.

She can't be claiming right over food with her father's wife when she has a husband.

crackland:
I don't know which of you two women is more silly.

Is it the witch who poured hot water on a baby, or a grown-up you who feels entitled to getting fed in a house you're squatting in.

Her own level of fvckery is definitely higher than yours though, that much is certain.

OperaNewsHubNg:
I read with sadness today about the very unfortunate news about the medical team from China that is coming to Nigeria to help The fight against corona virus.

Some doctors in Italy have been warning the world about how Chinese medical team arrived in Italy to help them as usual. By the time they could say Jack, the virus had spread in Italy. Infact the week the Chinese rendered their "help of death" they recorded Nine hundred and something deaths in one day.
A test was then carried out on the nose masks which they gave to the Italians and it was discovered that ALL THE FACE MASKS WERE DELIBERATELY LACED AND INFECTED WITH THE CORONA VIRUS and that was how Italy became the epicentre of the virus in Europe.

You don't need to have 2 brains to know that China is not a Nation to be trusted. Why are our leaders super block headed. Why are we opening the door to this red dragon nation ( they have a reason for referring to themselves as that). Mark my words if they come into Nigeria, to render the so called help, there will be an huge spike in the number of infected people in Nigeria.

If the Nigerian government won't help you, help yourself by avoiding these so called testing centres because they're people who were perfectly healthy until they went there to get tested and contacted the virus from those centres. The coming of the wicked Chinese will make it worse. The world health organisation is padding the truth about what is really happening. If you want to survive this period stay away from the centers and avoid any help coming from China. I wish the admins can move this to the front page.

DO NOT USE ANY KIT OR EQUIPMENT OR STUFF THAT IS DONATED BY CHINA THIS PERIOD I am not in anyway causing panic, I am only giving you heads up. Nigerians please for God sake apply wisdom this period. All good things don't come from abroad but from above.

N:B NO MATTER HOW HARD THEY TRY TO MAKE IT LOOK GOOD OR IMPORTANT, DO NOT ALLOW ANYONE OR ANY COUNTRY TO GIVE YOU ANY VACCINES. DO NOT ACCEPT IT. EAT LOTS OF VEGETABLES AND FRUITS TO BUILD YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM, WASH YOUR HANDS, STAY AT HOME, STAY SAFE AND ABOVE ALL, STAY WISE AND SHARP