₦airaland Forum

BobbyHammar:
Anybody who still believe in the scam of no sex till marriage needs to get their head checked. If only you know how many marriages have been destroyed or are still suffering because of this, you will never think of falling for such a scam.

What baffles me is those who keep going to church but yet don't know anything about bible and will keep deceiving themselves that sex before marriage is a sin (WHICH YEYE SIN).

Many will say it's formication but they don't even know the true meaning of fornication as referred to in the bible. Take for example when Joseph was dating Mary, yes we agree she was still a virgin because it was their own decision not to have sex yet but how many people realized that there were other young women that existed then as well. Many had boyfriends too and some had sex with their boyfriends while some didn't because Mary wasn't the only virgin.

The bible never condemned those that had sex with their boyfriends before marriage but it was just the divine choice of the Father to select a virgin rather than a lady that had sex already.

Let's stop all these brohaha low African mentality of calling sex before marriage a sin. God only sees a clean and a pure heart, not who had sex when or how. You all should better respect yourself and save the doctrine of marriage by testing the waters to ensure you are ready to sail on that water for the rest of your life. Not after marriage you start looking for divorce because penis is too big or too small or maybe Virgina is too tight or too wide or its always one minute sex.

Haba.

Tasha7:
Hello, I am a black woman born and raised in North America and married to an Igbo man. We have been in a long distance relationship for the majority of our relationship. We got married almost 2 years ago while still long distance and he recently immigrated to Canada in Jan 2020 under the spousal sponsorship. He has a wonderful bond with my mother and sisters. (my father has passed). I have met his family and we get along very well.

Everything was going well until I was looking up something in the search history of the laptop we both share and stumbled across emails he had recently accessed. Please note, I could not read the email itself, I could only see the subject lines in the search history. I will attach pictures if possible. It wasn't a normal email account like yahoo or Gmail. It was from a website called: Roundcube webmail. I had never heard of it before. Anyway, there were a bunch of emails forwarded from a hotel in Istanbul where people were being asked to pay their outstanding hotel bill (unfortunately I didn't take a screenshot of the hotel stuff). In addition to that, there were emails to 2 different women (named Wendy and Elizabeth) with the subjects: re: Thank you for written, re: back from customs baby, re: I am so happy our paths have crossed re: I am writing you with much sadness in my heart etc. I will try to attach the screenshots I took.

Lastly, within the same search history, my husband seemed to have been looking up songs like: 'what songs make a woman feel confident about herself' and 'what if I never get over you', and 'songs that make a woman feel beautiful'.

I confronted my husband that same night. It was 2am. He was already sleeping. I woke him up bc I wanted to catch him off guard. His explanation was that his friend in Cyprus had a bad internet connection and asked him (my husband) to look up something in his friends email account. He insisted that he had no idea what his friend was up to, as it was none of his business. In the process of me confronting him, he grabbed the laptop from me and deleted the search history. I told him that was making him look real guilty and I started packing my things to leave. He pleaded and insisted it had nothing to do with him, it was his friends email account blah blah blah. I wanted to believe him but some things just didn't add up...like why was he looking up those songs if he was just checking his friends email for him? His only saving grace was that the subject lines were written with poor grammar and my husband has excellent English speaking and writing skills.

Fast forward a few weeks later, my husband left the bathroom to put out the garbage and accidentally left his phone in the bathroom playing music. This is significant because he has never parted from his phone from the day he arrived. He sleeps with his phone beside him. He showers and uses the bathroom with his phone beside him. When he cooks, he keeps his phone beside him. The day in question, I went into the bathroom and locked the door shortly after he left the bathroom. Side note: I only lock the door bc sometimes he jokingly sneaks up on me to scare me while I am in the shower, so to avoid being snuck up on, I sometimes lock the door. I digress. I commenced using the bathroom when I noticed that hubby left his phone on the side of the bathtub with Nigerian gospel music blasting. I was shocked! It was the first time he was separated from his phone! I didn't touch his phone and started using the bathroom. Within 15 seconds, my husband started knocking on the door saying he really needed to use the bathroom and wanted me to open the door. He was saying he really needed to pee. I asked him to hold a minute, because I was on the toilet. He said he didn't believe me and then things escalated from there. He started pounding really hard on the bathroom door, demanding that I open the door because he really needed to pee. He was eventually pounding so hard and yelling to the point where he started to lose his voice! I was freaked out! I told him to hold on and I would be done in a minute! But he wouldn't listen and eventually broke open the bathroom door by force...there is literally a large crack down the bathroom door now. I was shocked. Beyond words. Once he broke down the door, he quickly did a scan of the bathroom and saw his cellphone was right where he left it. I didn't touch it. Then he was more calm. He then reiterated that he really needed to pee and went into the shower, pulled the curtain and turned on the water.

I started freaking out. I started yelling telling him that he was a liar and if there was any doubt in my mind he was hiding something, I need not doubt it anymore! He broke down the bathroom door NOT because he really nedded to pee, but because he was so terrified I was going to snoop through his phone! Of course he denied it. He was saying that if that was the case, the first thing he would have done is grab his phone. I responded saying that he's not stupid, if he grabbed his phone first, it would have made him look guilty. After that blow up, we stopped talking to each other for days...

And here I am today. If anyone could provide me insight into what is going on, I would be so appreciative. What is this hotel stuff and what are these msgs to multiple women? I am thinking he may be involved in a 419 scam or his friend is a yahoo boy....but why is he using such poor grammar when he speaks and writes excellent English?

I am so stressed over all of this that it is literally consuming my every thought. My husband only denies everything and gets defensive then ignores me if I keep pushing for answers. Outside of this incident he is incredibly loving and affectionate and treats my mother so well. He cares so much about what she thinks of him.

I have turned to this forum with the hopes that someone would have more insight into what is going on. Thank you so much to anyone who has taken the time to read this very long post and respond. I truly appreciate it. Again, I attached photos, but scratched out names just in case.

Thank you,

Tasha

JasonJidenna:
Dear sammyj,

If you don't know the purpose of a thing, please keep quiet..

Don't let your hatred consume you.

Guy all my friends in US have guns. Gun is a big deal here not there.
Good morning and Stay Safe.

Azazeal007:
This is really a sad moment for every Nigerian students out there, when you fit into a job description and then you found out they only want people with higher degree.

Graduating with a 3rd class or pass degree I believe is no sin. But employers out there would not even look at your CV when you are below par, no matter the amount of experience you are bringing. Some unavoidable things must have happened in school that led to that, but nobody cares.

How then do you tell that to the people around you? Especially your parents or guardians who’d be feeling like their investments on you went down the drain. When people finish from the university with a third class or pass degree, they most times feel like their whole world came crashing down on them. How then do one get to a good job?

I personally fall into this category due to some unforseen circumstances but who cares. After searching fruitlessly for jobs for a year now, I just have to sit back and think about my life.

My fellow Nairalanders what is the way forward?No job, no capital to startup my own business, no money to go back for a postgraduate course. Its just me myself and I (Owusagi)

RagaMufeen:
If the bill is passed, we will not see the likes of Buhari again.




https://www.thecable.ng/benue-rep-introduces-bill-to-raise-academic-qualification-for-president/