NewDelhi:
Back then in uni, during exam period....

My hostel was far from campus (and na trek we dey trek that year, no money) so I had to spend the night at a friend's place whose hostel was closer to campus. It was around 9PM, I got there and met him and his girlfriend .. I decided to take a nap first so I could wake up at night to read a bit. I was pressed in the dead of the night so I decided to go and ease myself but as I was about to get up, I started hearing strange noises. It was a double room tho (room and palour self contain . he occupied the inner room while his roommate who wasn't around occupied the palor) so I was in his own room sleeping while him and his babe were supposed to be sleeping in the palor.

Like I was saying, piss dey catch me heavily but the noise I heard didn't make me come out coz I was gonna interrupt them. From the kind of noise I dey hear, I could easily interpret the sex scene in my head. I started hearing something like kpo kpo kpo ( that noise you hear when you put a lollipop inside your mouth and force it out) she was obviously sucking his dick coz moments later she ran into the toilet to spit. Then I started hearing kpa kpa kpa ( this time around na definitely doggy Dem dey Bleep. )
. After the whole romp she went into the toilet to obviously urinate coz I started hearing sound of urine ( you know as ladies urine dey splash and sound na ) and she washed up too ( sound of person dey use water tamber ) . ....and moments later the guy went to urinate too. Note that I didn't see them but from the sound and noise I was hearing , I could easily interpret what was going on . Mind you all these while my bladder don nearly burst coz piss dey catch me. I had to wait a bit before opening the door and going out to piss because if I got out instantly , they might suspect. As I got out sef ehn the kind smell wey just full everywhere wan choke me. ( You know that kind stuffy smell wey dey scatter everywhere if two people just fvck finish for room na) . The next day I teased him with it he just dey laugh..and that time sef me I be virgin, no girlfriend, I didn't have too many friends, my clique was very small , no money, nothing nothing even my GP was very low because I was always thinking and hustling here and there taking tutorials and selling off my belongings just to make ends meet. Even when I managed to buy little food stuff , there was usually no pot to cook anything because I don sell am off. I could barely even bring a babe in coz my room wasn't even presentable. Ordinary chair sef no dey not to talk of matress. E bad so tey na mat I dey use sleep coz I sold off my matress too. Na my body remain wey I no sell that year. Everything about me was just miserable and negative. Well Sha just imagine the kind konji wey go nearly kill me that night as I dey hear two people dey knack .

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Bro, na laugh and won kill me for here , you for kukuma sell yourself

Nice one

Damn see money way only one person loot!!! , are you sure Abacha's full name is not "Martin LOOTER Sani Abacha??!

Congratulations

Davash222:
Advice him to get a second wife, so you can be relieved of your DUTY!!

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Oga, , abeg send me your location make I send you one crate of star beer

Comedian2019:

na La click la bend gang full nairaland aswear

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Hahahahahaha aswear bro

Pussy locking?? if you like no bring the Tory come Nairaland, no body go click am

Emmymarvel:

Waoh...so this actually makes sense to you. Waoh. Am so impressed by your stupidity

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Tnks bro for the insult, I appreciate

Make sense

Emu4life:
The Goat CR7 started playing football when Messi was still putting on pant but guess what?? mesSIX

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Lolz....take your messSix out of camp nou, and watch him turn useless����, beside show me any trophy your Messi how won for his dear country ..

Emu4life:
It still doesn't change the fact that he has the highest goals in Classico history.

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And why Wouldn't he He has been their be4 the GOAT lord CR7

UrVillagePpl:
Bolanle pepper them





Meanwhile space Bookers wehdon ooo

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kestolove95:
Even at the door to his place the car looks black but in the movie the actor was injured while I was charging my phone but my cloths are not ironed and I wanted to go for the wedding and I saw him last nite

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Aunty!! Are you normal

H

tritt:
This is a super storyyyyyyy

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A life of stress and sorroooooooow

jimmyolasun:


are you standing with toothpicks??

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Hahahahaha make una leave me na,,, I'm a sprinter , am I supposed to be fat?

Bubu also came in? I thought the last person to enter closed the gate? ... Some one said he climb fence enter...

Happy new year my fellow nairalanders,.

thundafire:
ur legs tiny sha

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Lolz..... Nigga I'm a sprinter , I need to watch my weight

clems88:
hope you have eaten before you fall down and break

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Lola...nigga I'm a sprinter, I need to watch my weight

erico2k2:

Bross U B like who this BAN on foreign rice affect well well



nah joke I dey ohhhh

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My guy ,,, una jos d cast me

Yuneehk:

Alika

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Awwnn thanks

MostBlessedOne:
na lie I talk

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Na be lie....

Happy new year in advance

Riele:


.

Yes Yes .

We could be friends .

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WhatsApp number?

MostBlessedOne:
"oga yellow" with pink lips abeg chop well na, make breeze no blow u enter buhari room for as rock

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Baba na wa for u ooh...hahahahaha

Riele:


Hey .

I'm in love

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We could be friends if u want...

Shugargal:
Mi likey ya obi biggy shoes.. � smiles

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Lolz...

Lamanii22:




Awwwwn you're so finee

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Tnks bby

I no go carry lass for this trend

Thank you my fellow nairalanders, 2019 has been awesome with all you guys, with those cribs cracking comment, mind blowing relationship adavice, just name it...thank you all ....

See u guys in 2020 ..

Big thanks to Seun!!

OoniOfIfe:


Sergent!! what is the situation on ground?
....I repeat, what is situation on ground?
over

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Sir situation beyond control men needed

Animadontel:
Target on the run I need air support I repeat air support HQ do you copy

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Ok general support on the way, stay in position