mama-gee:

Why are pregnant women always stared at?

I don't stare, but there is something beautiful in concept and appearance of an expectant mother carrying another life in her womb. I cannot fully explain it, but I always marveled at the sight of a pregnant woman.


I think Tisha Campbell looked especially stunning when she was expecting.

nellaluv:

55  year old Charla Nash was  viciously attacked by her friend Sandra Herold's  pet chimp Travis. Travis had been living with  Sandra as a pet. She treated the chimp like a  child. The attack happened when Sandra called  Charla to help with Travis, but when Charla  arrived at Sandra's house that night, Travis  turned on her.  The animal broke most of the bones in her face  and ripped off her hands, nose, lips and eyelids  during the vicious assault in Stamford,  Connecticut. Doctors removed her eyes due to an infection, and only recently did she learn she'll  no longer be able to see. A large part of her scalp is missing, she only has  one thumb and is fed fluids through a straw in a  hole in her face specially created by doctors. Charla marked her 56 th birthday by speaking  about the incident for the first time, by  appearing on The Oprah Winfrey Show  yesterday Wednesday 11th 2009. She normally wears a veil in front of her face to cover her injuries but  agreed to lift it on the programme. "People are going to say what they're going to  say," she said. "I need to move forward and get  better and stronger." She added: "I'm the one  who has to look like this. Not them. So it doesn't  matter what they say."
The police shot Travis dead after the attack on  Charla. Charla is suing Sandra for $50million over the chimp  attack.
What a tragic thing to happen to her. May God  give her the strength she needs to cope with  this.
Now brace yourself . . .

Until that awful incident, I had no idea how viciously violent and savage chimps could be. Since then, I don't look at chimps the same way. I have resisted seeing a picture of her until now. That is one of the most horrific that I have ever seen. God help her.  

Radiant:

Not again! Not again!!

How do NLders have the power to dissect a personality and intentions of a person they don't know? You guys beat me to this game for real.

I mean, a man with a history of failed marriages is a no go area. You've been with him for 8 months you say, haven't you seen enough handwritings on the wall that will help you make up your mind on this man?
You don't sound like you want marriage or you don't want to be a house wife. Why don't you tell him that and leave the r/ship since that's all he wants- a house wife? Trust me, if he's traditional like you say he's just gonna remain that way. Them kinda people hardly change. So, the earlier you decide, the better.

Besides, he's free to marry from any country and not obliged to marry from his own country. He already told you that Nigerian women are not romantic. Well, that's his reason and doesn't mean bad of him anyway. People and their choices.

I think you should take Radiant's advice.

mi2009:

Most of his life was spent in Africa, but he's dated mostly white woman. He been married  to two black woman, and it seems like he is trying to mold me. I am trying to figure out what is his purpose. Of course, I could just ask him the question. Why is he trying to make me different than I am. But I am trying to see if that is part of his culture. To shape your women into house wives.

His dating white women seems to be an issue in your mind. It might be relevant, but I don't know what to make of that. What do you know about the African American woman he married and how long did that last?

mi2009:

I am a African American woman dating a Nigerian guy. Let me tell you a brief story. Since he has been in America he has dated many white girl. He has been married twice both to black women. One from Africa and the other from America, so he has his paper. He told me that he doesn't want to marry a woman from his country because they are not romance. It's hard for me to believe that, but I guess anything is possible. He keep mentioning if I could marry a man like him. He is also trying to mold me into whatever he likes.  First, I don't understand why he doesn't want to marry someone from his own country and I am wondering why he is trying to mold me and why he keeps talking about marriage. Is that part of a game he is playing? 

There are two things that bother me. First, that he has been married twice already. Second, it sounds like he is trying to rush marriage. If I understand correctly, you don't know him very long? The thing about him trying to mold you does bother me too, but not as much as the other things. I would be cautious if I were you.

No2Atheism:

You are watching too much television and hanging out with brainwashed black men i guess.

Most black men that i know prefer african ladies with african features.

Some white men have the same preference.

nj11:

Thank you guys so much for your advise,you guys are awesome,i am finally able to talk to somebody about what has be en eating me up for years. I am very much trying to find something to love in my husband,all there is,is that he loves me genuinely,which is hard to find now and he is a very kind individual.

My thing is the attraction,when you are not attracted to somebody is hard to enjoy being around them,intimacy is a problem,when it comes to that am still withdrawn, feels like being raped,waiting for it to be over.

I don't trust my ex 100% ,but am happy when am around him can be myself,i think he feels thesame way too,at-least he showes to be so into me,has that energy I've been longing for.

My only pain in it all is my child,don't want to hurt him,but i want to be happy.

I strongly encourage you not to leave your husband. Marriage is a sacred lifetime commitment and if you give in to the temptation you are likely to regret it later on. It is possible to rekindle your feelings. You should get counseling.

This is awful news!

redgalusa:

Please help me. I am a 29 yr old Afro American woman who has been dating a Nigerian man for the past 2 years. The problem is, I do not believe he wants to marry me. He has been trying o get me pregnant for the past 6 months, but I told him that in order for us to have a child together we must first get married. He agreed to those terms, but he said that we can not just jump up and get married. He told me that he has to call his mother who lives in Africa and we have to prepare for marriage. It took him 6 months to get in contact with his mother. He told me month after month that he can not get a hold of her, until I finally told him that if we do not get married I will leave him and I did. So after 6 months of trying to contact his mom, 2 days after I broke up with him he informed me that he spoke to his mother and she has one request,  that she is present for our wedding. I respect and understand her wishes, however, now we will have to wait another 6 months for his mother to get a Visa.
I must include that he bought me a very expensive diamond engagement ring, as a show of good faith.  All of his family and friends know me, and we attend all of the local Nigerian weddings, baby showers, and ceremonies together. I even attend his Nigerian church with him, but I can not shake the gut feeling that makes me believe that he does not want to marry me.

His older sister has not made any effort to try to get close to me as a sister in law would, and he lied to me about his age. He told me that he is only 35, however, as I was cleaning  his room I came across a work document which he transcribed that stated that he was 43, and I found evidence that he is still communicating with a woman from his homeland who he promised to marry 8 years ago. I confronted him about it and he lied to me and said that it was a woman who wanted to marry him for a green card, but he declined.  I suggested that we live together, but he has made every excuse to continue to live with his room mate.  I feel like I am living a lie and I don't know what to believe. I asked his auntie (whom I am very close to) why he has not married me, and she told me as she rubbed my belly that he is waiting for me to have a baby for him. Is this really true? As prerequisite to an African man marrying an American woman you must first have a child for them?

P.S- He is a U.S citizen

I would greatly appreciate any input you have, as I have learned that dating an African man is very complex full of customs, mysteries, and traditions.

I am a white American man and what I think about your situation transcends nationality. It would be a mistake to have a child before marriage. It would not be fair to the child and if your relationship does not last, it would be a bad situation for you and him as well. As far as I am concerned, if it is important for you to be the mother of his child, then it should be just as important to him for you to be his wife. But most of all, you clearly indicated that you really do not trust him. You already determined that he lied to you. There can be no real relationship without trust. Follow your gut feeling, because it is usually correct! I hope it all works out for you.

Tisha Campbell and Duane Martin
[img]http://mediaoutrage.files./2008/01/tisha-campbell-and-duane-martin-blk_1_1.jpg[/img]

prittigrrr:

@ jany

(Maybe, just maybe, they liked me despite my being a disgustingly, fat, stupid, useless AA BBW. ) How could you say such a thing about yourself, Hmmm, U better start building your self-image and make sure you email me and I will meet with you and access your body very well, where r u located?

Dear Jany,

Thank you for your nice offer, but I thought it was clear from my original post that the comment I made about being fat, stupid were obviously made as sarcasm.  Honey, I am far from seeing myself in those terms.  I only made them to point out the foolishnesh with which some other posters have made comments.  The bottom line is this, if you like BBWs, enjoy yourself and go for us.  We are great and wonderful and beautiful like all women are.  If you don't like BBWs, please, pass us by.  There are many other men who find us appealing and would love to enjoy the sweetness that is the BBW experience!

Prittigrrr, I knew right away you were being sarcastic.

They all have nice bodies, but I prefer Beyonce, especially because she is faithful to her man, unlike J-Lo, who is now on her third marriage.

ono (m)
N'Djamena
Re: Why Am I Often Approached By African Men? (An African-American Woman)
« #12 on: April 13, 2006, 10:07 AM »

"So, Chelly, myself and Kajad are saying thesame thing.

There's something ''African'' in you. And I think you should come home to Africa, where you'd get all that you need. Don't believe in all those false talk about Africa in the US. They are grossly misleading. You'd surely like it in here.

Besides, if Nigerians are the folks who kept coming around, it's because it has been generally acknowledged the world over that we are the ''happiest people on earth''. And they want you to take part in that enjoyment bliss in here. Now, isn't that some record to behold? and wouldn't you like spending the better part of your life with happy people? Just think about it. And also, just to let you in on Nigeria, there other better tribes in Nigeria. We have the Kanuris, the Ijaws, Isokos, Itsekiris, Urhobos, Ogoni's Oron, Ibibios, (of the Niger Delta stocks - rich and peace loving people of this world).

You'd get all you need in Africa. Just come ''home'', and you'd be glad you did."







Very interesting, Ono. Have you encountered other African American women looking to come 'home'?