Ochon's Posts
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 TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 11:29pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Psychedelia: Hey guys.You're welcome bro |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 11:01pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Kslib: E good, flex wella..LMAO 
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| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:56pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Reincarnated: Spill gharddamitRead my diary later on, gharddamit. Chill jor, make I confirm the news wella lertee: Lol,tell me they are related,bent neck and availability of suitors. Talk anotjer thing abegThey are, I'm a relationship sexpert, we know these things  I can't wait Nah, my eyes are on you  Reincarnated: BWUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHLMAO .. Thanks Kslib: Lol.. Iddiot, follow the instructions i gave lertee and listen.Na you and lertee go follow the instructions alone In short
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| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:43pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Kslib: Those who downloaded be like "My mb ooooooooooooooooooooooo" ..
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| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:42pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Thunder fire you LIpsy for wasting my MB
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| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:40pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Kslib: Are you kidding? It was nice..LMAO@flat, glass-table shaped head. Buwahahaha. Lwkmd . This LIpsy, no make me do another recap for you o |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:39pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
lertee: Not only engineer na architect..Stop bending your neck sweery, it chases suitors away My day was boring till a call made it nice. Good to know you are back, so I'll be getting my update via your diary soon, no?  |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:37pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
tunbebes: . Uwc Ochon. its up now...upload urs too.You haven't seen me all these while?. For real?. Well mine is up |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:28pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Nice pics tunbebes. Me likey  Black is indeed beaurifulllllll . Keep on rocking mamma mia |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:26pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Kslib: Lol.. I just dey like dele..LMAO... That meme tire me I swear. . I though the epistle was dry, na wa o, I didn't know I tired . I was LMAO while writing it |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:26pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
lertee: Lmao,you deserve a slap seriously.LMAO... Your boo understands, after all I engineered NJOTEE How was your day dearie? |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:25pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
dommfa: Lol@ aint nobody got that time, omo esuLMAO@omo esu. Abeg translate. Buwhahahah@"should I just chill and expect a novel on it as usual?". Lwkmd. Doomfa, you dey tackle me well these days. You and LIpsy . Chai, I don suffer. Do I really write that long?. Well, I'll be updating it soon, I just a pictorial evidence from my brother and bam!!. It'll updated on my diary |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:10pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
dommfa: Pics\video or it isn't happening..LWKMD.. See Mrs ogbuefi, lwkmd.. Have you joined the "pic or it didn't happen" crew?. Well, remember the good news I told you about earlier?. That made me look forward to the new year, well it's that "news". And seriously, except when I'm at villa, I don't do that cross over night stuff. Aint nobody got that time |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:08pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
"Look back in forgiveness, forward in hope, down in compassion and up with Gratitude."- Zig Ziglar. Have a glorious cross over night peeps! |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:03pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Kslib: *****How you dey LIPsy |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 10:00pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
dommfa: I don't even know which parts to highlight..almost all the lines got me laughing out loud.. As in I wan pee for pant..LMAO... I thought the "recap" will be boring, but I gave it a try. Lwkmd. Glad that you loved it LMAO.. I need deliverance. Crossover fire!!. I dey my house dey dance o jare. Make them cross the over for me |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 9:59pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
lertee: That red part got me lmsao...jeeezzzzLMAO .. Your boo will keel me this night |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 9:59pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
tunbebes: sup peepz? bin following dis thread since day1 as a guest. ochon and rein...love ya loadz. u make ma day alwayz. dre and his boo abgift.,som and her boo spade,dannyxy,njokusboi and lertee his boo...tanx u allAwww.. Thanks tunbebes... Welcome to our lovely E-family I didn't see your pic BTW, re-upload |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 9:58pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
lmtm: Christmas was fun anyways,not like there's anything specifically that makes it fun but the village serene and the dramas around..some suitors come displaying power or cash and so many thingsHmm. That's good to hear. So suitors are coming already?. Why won't they, they can't resist you |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 9:22pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Hello peasants and peasantesses, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, fellaz and wivez, it's been a wonderful year, filled with mild fights, subtle jabs, hook-ups and breakups, all kinds of zoning, heartbreaks, friendships e.t.c. It's been one helluva ride. So to appreciate y'all, especially King Ochon for protecting the safety of this nook, we at the RELATIONSHIPS SEXPERTS FIRM [/b]will like to announce that we'll be giving a whooping 90% discount to any threadmate that patronizes us. I know all of y'all might be wondering what we do at [b]RELATIONSHIPS SEXPERTS FIRM(RSF), wondering "what the fúck is RSF?". Well, in RSF, we basically build relationship from the scratch. We mend broken relationship. Even when there's no sign of relationship or no hope of any, our highly recommended, quality, top notch "sexperts" have the supersonic abilities and brains to generate one. Even those that wants to be FWKB(friends with kissing benefits(reinc and SOM)  ), FWB(friends with benefits), or wanna improve their "bedmatics" skills, will all be catered for in our firm/institute.. We boast of a 98% successful relationship mended rate(SRMR). Whereas other firms can't you give 30% SRMR. We've been able to hook up jay-z and beyonce, jekyll and ella, tabh and LIPsy, SOM and spade, GEJ and PEJ, obama and michelle, rooney and his wife, coleen and a host of other countless celebrity relationships and dating and marriage.With us, you don't have to fear the virus of FRIENDZONING. We've sexperts, headed by two of our very best, King Ochon and King Reinc. Many years of getting ochonged, friendzoned, brotherzoned, siggy zoned(reinc ), no-hope-zoned,betrayedzoned both offline and online, have toughened this two Kings up and gave them an indepth knowledge of the disease called REINjection and also how make relationships successful. IyawoTm is also one of our client . Now in the spirit of xmas, we'll give out one lecture for the NO-HOPE-ZONED amongst us like dre11, GOM and dannyxy. Lwkmd. Buwhahahahahaha . To show 'em how to make a girl love you. How to make a SUPERFLAKIE(shy lady), become a LMTM(open up and chat with you) Now, we've a case study, one of your very own, the EARBROW peasant called Njokusboy. . You see, since this guy's life, he's never crushed before. He flirted and chased gurls up and down like a he-goat on heat, (lwkmd) he never knew what fallen in love with an online character was like. He disbelieved in such theory. To him, it was non-existent, vague. All these changed when a surreal power of love/crush hit our loyal kwasia peasant called nokusboy . He fell for Lertee but the problem is that, this useless peasant didn't how to woo her, to avoid her ochonging him and also after boasting of "I don't crush" . So he came to us, reinc and King Ochon, for help. And like the caring Kings we're, we decided to help his sorry behind. So we monitored lertee, her behavourial pattern, the she posts and most especially, her likes. Now listen up "NO HOPES"(dre11, GOM, dannyxy and co) , the best way to get into you crush's heart is to know what she likes. Her likes and dislikes, from there, you can have a better chance of breaking her barriers. . E.g, when toyintomato came to meet us, we told him, SOM a.k.a Miss Ogbuefi hates uptight guys, but he didn't listen, instead he was chasing reinc. Lwkmd. Before he could know what is happening, "the has long sailed", meaning SOM had become addicted to psychedelia and my nigga weeped . So armed with our lesson, njokusboy, made the first and BOLD move. Emphasis on "bold". You see, ladies love confident guys, guys that ain't scared to protect them and showcase 'em to the world. That's why lekpalicious chose reinc before ochonging him. Lwkmd . Reinc no vex, but I have to say the truth. . So as I was yarning, njoku made the BOLD move below ↓↓↓↓njokusboy: Yeah, I have a confession, don't take it personal, ever since I heard ur name "leeterfa".... Sounds lyk l the name of a character in one of maya angelous poems,, since then, I have been unable to rest my head, a million butterflies dance to skelewu in my stomach anytym I come across ur post on nairaland, sumtin tells me u are my ticket to heaven, in ur embrace, I am destined to lose my mind, I involuntarily dedicated my first ever love poem to you, my sweet bar of chocolate, it is titled, "latifah, love".. I am not usually romantic but you have captured my soul, out of d thousand words dancing in my head as I type this, I sincerely cannot find one suitable enough to describe the magnitude of my affection for you, my heart misses a thousand beat for you, am so scared I might get a cardiac arrest... Don't leave me in the lurch, pls don't let me wither in the cold, I'd be waiting patiently, in dis dark and lonely room, as my heart gets fainter, pls come and save me from this web of emotional pandemonium, I implore.... U re the best,u know, my sincere quest, on whose behest I kneel, place ur hand on my chest and let me rest, that in ur heart, I may no longer be a guest....The words were so on point that toyintomato began tripping for him. . LmaoToyinDipo: @Njoku, your poem can make any feminine lady slip and fall in love, I read it and I tripped.When he made that move, he was doubting the potency of our skills and he wrote njokusboy: If dis tin no work ehn, I go kill u.. AswearSo like a sexpert I am, I told him lalaosky: She's just shy, man upbut the useless peasant lost hope when lertee replied his epistle with. Just "awwww" and then he complained to lertee, asking if only "awww" is what she can say. Telling her "so you ochonged me". Lwkmd. And attacked me sayingnjokusboy: U slimy lizard, u knew dis was gonna happen nd u kept pushing abiBut as an experienced sexpert, I retorted, encouraging him that we never fail to deliver with the below lalaosky: Kwaaaaaaaaa!!He then mailed us offline, ranting and raving but King reinc would have none of it and told him Reinc: sharap there this bloddy peasant. All these peasant around me, I'm a you king. Ochon: kwasia reinc mumu, advice him jor, you are here shouting peasant this, peasant that. mtcheeewwww. Reinc: earbrow, you have to trust us. Our services are well known, it never fails. So the peasant was now full of confidence and wrote below njokusboy: Don't worry bro, dat was not a love poem, dat was just a tip, the love poem is coming soon..... No be only her shell I go break, I go break her vertebral column.. If she no gree, I go drink rat poison...Lwkmd. Buwahahahah So I chipped as with my expertise lalaosky: Now you're talking!!. Chicks dig confident dudes. Dudes that can protect them in the time of adversities like thisAnd like all ladies that love confident guys, lertee fell dangerously in love with him and confessed and even blew the peasant a kiss lertee: Are you scared? I like the poem,it has small romance in it and it got me wooow.The earbrow lord nearly fall my hand by hyperventilating cos of a kiss, but I forgave him cos I know how love dazes us all njokusboy: Is dat a kiss?But I had to caution him and tell to be on his toes before he slips up lalaosky: Calm down. Don't buckle under love pressureNow, you see, the problem with all these NO-hope zoned like dre11 is that they ain't versatile. That's why superflakie got tired of "do you have a thing" ish dre11 was usuing to break her shell. Lwkmd. So being an expert in this, I told switch to another hobby of lertee, which is her love for novels. In case you didn't know. Njokusboy have never read all those novels that he was saying. We told him to lie, just to make lertee fall for him. He was like "but she won't forgive me if she finds out" and reinc told him Reinc: mtcheeeeewww . Useless peasant. Shin shin, you don't know. You don't know shingbain. . Haven't you heard of "if you have never lied to your woman, you don't love her"?. Ochon: I tire for this earbrow. Don't question us goddamit!!. Do as we commanded, this earbrow peasant  .So the peasant switched to novels and lertee fell for it,, see below lertee: Lol njokusboy: So lertee my beloved, my oasis in the desert of life, my blue aPple, we need a rendezvouz, u nd I, where in dis world do u fancy?? njokusboy: Nah, but I'd love to, what is it aboutAt point, when njoku was breaking her shell, she became shy. Awwww... Now fellaz, when a lady is shy to look you in the eye, it means she's almost fallen, a lil "push" and she's all yours and also give her confidence too like we told Mr earbrow lertee: Lol,i am shy njokusboy: Don't be, with me u don't need to be shy, am here for you...Awwww. Love nwantiti. *sniffs*. Now the NO-HOPE zoned, always remember that the LIPsy's will always try to discourage you. The LIPsy's are those that are tripping for a gurl you want but lack the confidence to talk to her, like KsliP . See belowKslib: See this one!! You're just some minutes inside the jungle called 'love' and you don begin see 'blue apple'.. I sure say if lertee blow aother kiss, you go see yeloow coconut.. Wake-up!!LWKMD. Papa ostrich too wicked But njoku did fear, cos he's gotten lertee where he wanted her, so he kept up the novel chat even though he has read none of them. Lwkmd njokusboy: The mafia managerNow as I lectured you guys earlier, don't dwell on one subject, know what the lady wants and use it to break her shell. So when njoku ran outta ideas, he consulted me and reinc and we told "she loves Man Utd", attack her from there, she go go gberekete" and the peasant attacked sharparly. See belownjokusboy: My sunshine, are u also a fan of manchester united? Choi, this union was blessed in heaven lertee: Mafia's manager a small book on business and day to day managerial activities,it only opens one heart to the Machiavelli principle. I only read the review,i am yet to read the book. It is just a small book,it cant be more than 120 pages. njokusboy: Lertee, when u re ready to go to bed, lemme know...And then King ochon stepped to bless the union and cement the legacy of NJOTEE lalaosky: Njokusboy ---- man utd fanSo you see, all those OCHONGED and REINJECTEEs, don't fret, patronize KING OCHON AND KING REINC and y'all lives will never remain the same Mail us @ KingOhcon@peasantreinc.com. Happy new year in advance E-Fam 7 Likes |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 5:06pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
dre11: Ochon don't get me wrongLMAO .. I'm only joking o. Haba, you should know me by now . I'm just playing around to liven up this thread. Flakie understands, don't worry. And yeah, I know what you meant cos you guys have chatted to each other after the previous misunderstanding. So we cool, it's just me being mischievous as always. |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 4:26pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
Cest moi my crush, please don't hold back, start anything with me https://rgifs.gifbin.com/052009/1243271414_black_guy_laughing.gif 1 Like |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 4:25pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
LMAO@start anyTHING with me. So you had a THING for flakie? Peasant reinc, your confession posts is working. I need to confess mine before this year runs out.... Lemme gather enough morale first 1 Like |
| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 4:23pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
dre11: I thought i saw superflake nowhttps://whyfiles.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/4.jpg https://rgifs.gifbin.com/052009/1243271414_black_guy_laughing.gif Buwahahahahaha.. I'm in tears right now
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| TV/Movies › Re: Big Brother Africa "The Chase" Official Thread by ochon: 4:21pm On Dec 31, 2013 |
StateOfMind: Last I recall, you nominated yourself for worst english...kslib only helped you with the fabu nomination, so Makuo yaLMAO@ makuo ya. LMAO . Come SOM, is this what Jovialjov, your step daughter has been teaching you? . How I wish I still write recaps, two of una for dey my list LOL.. Why are you shy kwanu? . Say something jor, it's not as if you don't sleep and daydream about it Thanks.. This one you are feeling it "noni", is the Igbo dude....  |
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