₦airaland Forum

A husband raped his new wife on their wedding night after she told him she didn’t want to have sex, a court heard.

The woman, who is in her 20s, told Exeter Crown Court she was so drunk after she returned home from the wedding reception that she told her husband she did not want to have sex.

However, her husband ignored her pleas and forced her into it against her will.

He is also charged with raping her another four times during their two-year marriage.

She finally went to the police after being attacked twice in two days. The husband denies five rapes.

Richard Crabb, prosecuting says the husband’s attitude to his wife changed after the wedding and he developed a sense of entitlement, telling her ‘You’re my wife, it’s allowed’ when she complained about his attacks.

The husband is also accused of raping her when she was heavily pregnant, while she was still in stitches after the baby’s Caesarean birth, and on two later occasions.

The wife denied inventing the allegations as a way of getting her husband out of her life and getting him into trouble.

She said: ‘I was scared of him. I knew what a temper he has got. I was afraid he would take my babies. They are my life.

‘I was petrified. I know it sounds messed up but it is how it was.

‘I had loved him to bits but I did not want to live like that any more.

‘On our wedding night I remember saying no and saying just because I am married to him I still had the right to say no.

‘I remember saying it and then passing out for a bit and then finding him on top of me having sex with me. I did not want sex at that stage. That was why I had said no.’

The trial continues.


Na wao! Wonders shall never end!

From: Dailymail.co.uk
Source:http://africanspotlight.com/2012/05/man-charged-for-raping-wife-on-wedding-night/

OP. You are not alone. Several people find themselves in such circumstances. Don't mind all these guys coming around now. They are time wasters and road blocks to your happiness. As it sounds, I guess your current fiancee loves you more than you love him. I hope you didn't accept him because there were no suitors when he came? In all, your conclusion to continue with him is the best option. Just love him and forget about the other guys. Best of Luck!

moremi2008: Your fiancee's attitude towards conflict is not sustainable. Constructive conflict resolution is an essential part of building a strong relationship. Sweeping things under the rug is like building a house on rubble. Soon enough, the house will start to wobble and trouble will start. I think it's important that you get your wife to politely talk through issues with you. In fact, the fact that she refuses to talk about previous issues means that she is NOT completely over them. I don't know the full context of your relationship but this might be a red flag.

Thank you for your advice. I really appreciate.

Royal Roy: Maybe i should come swap my babe with yours. Be thankful man. You sure havent met a lady who doesnt believe she's wrong, and so will argue everything with you. Be very thankful,its an attribute not a flaw to listen and take to corrections.

@ Royal Roy
I appreciate her so much. I am not just comfortable with leaving issues unresolved and moving on. I just want us to talk things over and resolve them much more later so that no one 'd be hurt but she 'd not be willing to discuss them.

breathing: you are probably writing about this cuz it's sometimes disturbing to be with someone who refuses to talk about issues.

Even if she is over the issue and doesn't want to talk about it, sometimes you aint over the issue and you still need to talk about it, yet she just would not. (i have experienced this type of behaviour)

And you would always have this fear, that even though now she thinks she has forgiven you, maybe she is just storing up all these issues and one day (maybe several years later) she might just dig up all of them for you, and label them 'things she has been tolerating from you', and this fear mostly always turns out to be true.

I advice you to talk to your fiancee about the need for couples to completely discuss every issue until BOTH parties feel that the matter has been adequately dealt with.

You are right on point. You know what my fears are exactly. I will talk to her about it. Thank you

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ronkebp: My dear poster, you have a woman who does not want to aggravate things beyond any point, i like that, that is a very good attribute and attitude towards life. I just hope you will listen to her too when she complains about the things she does not like.

I have always listened and willing to make more efforts. Thank you

Dyt: Ppl lyk us r so rare u know
Enjoy everybit of her
Lucky u

It is well!

Dyt: U v a wonderful woman dere, so wats d point of botherin ursef
Dats er own flaw, a slightly preferable one sha

Thank you! Just wanted to know if we are doing things the right way. I appreciate your reply

taryour: very very good. Op, dats excatly woth i do also in my relationship and it as greatly woked for me cos o av a very bad temper,my hubby to as a bad anger. I av used this method in my marriage n its been wokin for me(but my hubby n i normaly discuss d isues later in very humble and polite mood wen it as ben resolved).
U av no problem at all as long as she dosnt do all d things dat brot up d misunderstandings. No problem at all.

Yes she doesn't do them. Thank you so much!

I need advice from experienced Nairalanders on an issue bothering me.

I hardly quarrel or have misunderstanding with my fiancee but once in a while when we do or when she gets upset, she decides to keep quiet and no matter what I say, she would just keep quiet. At the worst, she cries when I react to something she did wrong.

What is of concern to me is the fact that a few hours later after a misunderstanding, when she calls or I call her, she 'd act normal as though nothing had happened. When u want to remind her she 'd simply apologize and ask you to let the issue behind us. She prefers not to discuss it and prefers that the issue(s) should be ignored.

When I try to get her to talk about it, she 'd say she is through with the issue and doesn't want to go back to it. The truth is that she never makes references to them and if its something you want her to stop doing, she 'd discontinue it.
Is it okay to leave issues/misunderstandings in that way without resolving them? What are the risk of leaving issues unresolved and moving on even if you get the desired response or change?

MULTILINKS IS THE BEST

Red Card! John Terry................as predicted

joeydozzy: I would say doctors cos they see pucies everyday and they know so many things about the chicks.

lol

onila: in Nigeria its female bankers

all Nigerian men regardless of his profession is a LovePeddler[i][/i]

Na wao! Don't u think ur conclusion is too extreme?

Dyt: Politicians
Biz men/women


Flirtin s got nottin 2 do wit profession
Sm jst wants 2 no mata wat dey do

You are right but don't you think it is more common with certain professions?

In which of the following professions are we likely to find MEN AND WOMEN WHO FLIRTS? The Banking profession, The Force (Police, Soldiers, Navy, Customs etc), The Media, Lawyers, Teachers/Lecturers, Health experts (Doctors and Nurses), Civil Servants....... You can add yours if it is not among the listed but make sure you back anyone you choose with a convincing point....... Let me hear your view nairalanders....... Lets discover some discoveries.

I think she didnt use a keke napep cos she is poor. Look at the background images properly and you will see an Infiniti QX 35 and a Siena Space Bus decorated for the wedding

Outstrip: If she was really cheating on him then she would not have done the traditional wedding. I wonder what the flimsy excuses are? I would like to know. If my sister told me that the man she was marrying tells her that if she commits adultery then something bad would happen then I would tell her to reconsider. Not because of the adultery but because someone who hangs a threat over your head like that even though it has not basis is not marrying you based on trust. If the way you plan to keep your spouse faithful is hoping on some thing to keep her to you in fear then you will make her life hell with your insecurity. The part about her hugging her ex shows that this man probably had driven her away with his insecurity. Someone who suspects someone of actually cheating would say things like I saw this on her phone or she is secretive etc. All this one says is about hugging her ex. I don't get it. It just sounds like such a one sided story. It takes a lot for a woman to walk away after her traditional and court wedding. Your friend is not saying everything.

What I know is what I have written. I know they may be some other reasons, but what I wonder about is why she kept quiet and accepted to marry him anyway. Even his family wants him to back out because everything was ok until she said she was no longer interested. I have not heard from the lady and she has traveled back to her place of primary assignment because she is a serving youth corp member.

tasandra: lol lol Op,tell ur frnd to move on.....that woman,is hrtless i think God,s tryin to send that she devil away 4rm that guy...my dear Op,no 2 talk put ooo,because man and woman mata,na small small dem dey put mouth.so,u no go becom de bad person 2moro na him sabi make e go dey beg her...afta wen she cheat,her hubby eye go clear.afta all na 4ox her hubby 4ox her marry

I don shut my mouth with padlock sef. lol

Odunnu: Imagine!
The kinda picture you see and you whisper a prayer for help on her behalf.
Yet some foolish NLndrs will not hesitate to insult people's mothers. Some of our mothers literally kill themselves to give us a better life than they had/have and just when they want to rest from the troubles of the day, some twats here would start raining insults on them. The thing dey vex me well well

I agree with you that our mothers are really trying, but is this risk not too much? My concern is the amount of risk she had to take.

chaircover: This is what makes me laugh when DK and family come here and insinuate that Nigerian women are lazy gold diggers.

Go to Nigeria and you will see women like this working hard and taking all sorts of risks to sustain their families. Do you think that all those market women sit down and someone comes to supply them with goods? many of them are up at the crack of dawn going to the wholesale market, bush, farm etc to source their wares. Same thing at night. Go to any main road at 9pm and it is these women you will see with a baby on their lap selling all sorts of things. Surely they all cant be widows or single parents.

One old mama sells amala to the shop girls in my complex. The mama is about 60. When I engaged her one day, I found out that she makes all the food herself. She wakes up at 4 and rushes to the market, then comes back to cook. One day I did not see her, so when I asked her the next day she said that some people didnt pay her up the road and so she didnt have enough money to go to the market the next day so she couldnt cook. when I asked her how much she was being owed she said N800. I couldnt beleive it. Women like this are not alone. Many many women are sustaining their families. Kudos to them all.

I share same opinion with you too!

Can you imagine taking such risks to sustain one's family?

queensmith: what is it with Nigerians and their Nigerian food gan sef? change your diets save your wallet!!!

Toh! I tire o

No Wee: Could someone please tell me more about the MTN number I should ask the person I call frequently through Lyca and Lebara to get so that I can call with 1p per minute? Must the MTN number start with 08100 or 081 plus any other number?

The MTN number must begin with 0810 to enable you call at 1p

A protest by students of Benue State University has taken a more violent turn this evening following the shooting of a student in the chest by policemen.

At the time of this report, the students were pulling down most of the solar energy street lights on the road along the school campus all the way to Gyado villa and are reported to have also set the headquarters of the Board of Internal Revenue Service on fire.

The Registrar of the University, Dr. Timothy Utile has announced the closure of the institution and directed the students to vacate the campus immediately pending the ratification of the new academic calendar by the senate of the University.

The student had taken to the streets after a truck allegedly knocked down and killed a four hundred level student in the Department of Economics earlier in the day.

Our correspondent who visited the scene of the accident report that the student was crossing the road at the second campus when a truck coming from Gboko knocked her over and she died on the spot.

When the news of the accident spread to the campus, students in their numbers stormed the Gboko – Makurdi road, halting commercial activities and barricading the highway. Men of the police anti-riot squad were quickly dispatched to the scene and they tried to disperse the students with tear gas.

http://africanspotlight.com/2012/03/nigeria-police-shoot-student-in-benue-as-protest-turn-violent/

Beleaguered chairman of the House of Representatives committee on Capital Markets and Institutions, Herman Hembe, has stepped down from carrying out the investigations into the collapse of the capital market over the allegation of a N44 million bribe request.

All the members of the committee have also stepped down from the investigations.

An eight-member committee was constituted by the Speaker, Aminu Tambuwal to continue the investigation into the collapse of the capital Market.

Hembe’s case was further referred to the House Committee on Ethics and Privileges for further investigations.

However, the Chairman of the Ethics and Privileges Committee, Gambo Musa, who was part of Hembe’s 30-member committee has been barred from being part of the committee to investigate the bribery allegation.

The proposed two-week public hearing by Hembe’s committee to “ identify the manifest causes of the near collapse of the capital market with a view to finding lasting solution, became stunted when the Director-General of the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC), Arunma Oteh, alleged that the committee chair demanded a N44 million bribe from the SEC.

The House has nonetheless vowed to get to the root of the rot in the Nigerian capital market as it replaced the controversial Committee on Capital Market with the new ad- hoc committee.

The decision of the lawmakers followed the request of Hembe to step down from further probe of the sector as a result of the bribery allegation.

Hembe, who, before the commencement of the first business of the day, under point of order sought the approval of the House to step down including his committee members as well, revealed that it was the SEC boss that attempted to influence the committee through an offer of N30m.

http://www.thenationonlineng.net/2011/index.php/news-update/40387-hembe-steps-down-as-house-committee-chair.html

Watch Oyi Remix Video.

The video is so cool. Tiwa Savage really added flavour


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaH9oB2g82w

Andre Villa-Boas has parted company with Chelsea Football Club today

http://www.chelseafc.com/page/LatestNews/0,,10268~2633044,00.html

Hi Poster,
I understand your situation. You have made things difficult for yourself by paying the money he asked for. If he knows that you are hardworking, he won't ask for money or sex. These things happen but there is no need to panic. If you panic, you make yourself vulnerable. There are a few things you can do to get yourself out of the mess. Institutions have a formal way of dealing with these kind of issues to uproot useless breed of lecturers who demand for sex. Record all your next conversation with him and all phone calls, discuss your problem with the Dean and HOD of the faculty and also meet the Dean of Student Affairs. The other alternative is to look for a female lecturer in the faculty or department and tell her what you are passing through. She 'd guide you on what to do. If the story can reach the school management through these channels I have mentioned, the man will be dealt with. Alternatively, you can make contact with the editor of a national daily and see how the story can be made public.

Wonderful, very nice piece of write up!