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OohMpaTM's Posts

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Romance / Re: Nigeeria Girls Front And Form A Lot? by OohMpaTM: 8:23pm On Jan 08, 2014
flawless..S:
next year

So, no babies then

Let's just romance...what you say? smiley
Romance / Re: Valentine Gift For Him Or Her by OohMpaTM: 8:20pm On Jan 08, 2014
She's getting Ooh Mpa Vaseline and I'm getting her silencer kiss
Romance / Re: The Worst Response To 'I Love You'? by OohMpaTM: 8:17pm On Jan 08, 2014
Chomzy19: My fave replies
i luv youtube - wen i wanna code
you too - wen in a place i cant talk
ok - if u kip irritating me wit d sentence
hmmm - wen i dunno wia to place u for nw
Na Wash - for those i'm already in tune wit


D ones i've gotten:
For wia?
Acho iri m

Sweery, can ooh Mpa see your pics?
This one you get favorite and non-favorite replies, Ooh Mpa wanna see if your face is worth it undecided
Romance / Re: Nigeeria Girls Front And Form A Lot? by OohMpaTM: 8:09pm On Jan 08, 2014
flawless..S:
thanks

So, Sweety when you turning 18 so we can make babies?
Reply Asap smiley
Romance / Re: Nigeeria Girls Front And Form A Lot? by OohMpaTM: 6:34pm On Jan 08, 2014
I give up on these guys

Flawless, you hot. Reply Asap wink
Romance / Re: Nigeeria Girls Front And Form A Lot? by OohMpaTM: 4:29pm On Jan 08, 2014
davida222:
Oh.. i see

Bro, is this how you woo a hot chick like flawless? undecided

Seriously, we do give up cry

1 Like

Romance / Re: Is It Safe To Be Friends With "Cuddle Benefit' With A Guy? by OohMpaTM: 1:04pm On Jan 08, 2014
That boy is definitely gayy or cannot cuddle properly in the right places. Hopefully we can still help him..

Pm me and Ooh Mpa will meet you and cuddle you so you'll show the boy the right way to cuddle you angry

3 Likes

Romance / Re: Females with Gap tooth vs Females wit Dimples debate by OohMpaTM: 11:50am On Jan 08, 2014
Booty butt chic: grin grin grin im mars niccur

Interplanetal Sexx? shocked shocked

Let's make little green babies wink wink
Romance / Re: Love Don Die For Naija by OohMpaTM: 8:46am On Jan 08, 2014
Missmossy: Kinda true.



Sweety boo, you got straight legs and good hygiene?

Ooh Mpa is smooth looking with 6 pack and a 12 inch bonus.
Pm him for details wink
Health / Re: Man With Tumour All Over His Body After Doctors Remove One From His Waist by OohMpaTM: 8:38am On Jan 08, 2014
Obasgilbert: if i nor thank God for Handsomedity/beauty, wetin i gain?

With this your grammar, how will you get chicks?

Do more good by passing your WAEC first undecided
Romance / Re: My Wife Has Crazy Temper Tantrums by OohMpaTM: 9:25pm On Jan 07, 2014
That chick is 50 shades of fücked up

Try and let her use sexx as a weapon undecided
Romance / Re: His Girlfriend Is Spending Her First Weekend With Him......... He Needs Advice. by OohMpaTM: 9:18pm On Jan 07, 2014
Mynd_44:
I dont know about the bath ooooo. During your chat/calls have you two spoken about sex and how comfy one another is?

As the guy I quoted said, take walks, try to show her memorable places in your area, see places, and places where you can have fun and laugh things off a lot. Dont try to have sex with her on the first night to remove the impression that you only want sex (I am assuming you are looking for a long lasting thing) you guys should cook together, say jokes and just be free. And while you are walking, hold her to the right side so she is not walking close to cars, hold her hands and have you hand around her next if possible (you can try the waist as time goes though)

At night, do loads of cuddling start with some peck, kiss her head, checks and the lips (look her in the eyes while you kiss her lips for the first time. It shows confident and also you telling her to trust you) dont push it if she resists, just stop and do something else (dont worry about her calling you "weak" and "not man enough". A woman who says no when she means yes is childish and confused which I am sure you dont want).

In the morning, have some friends over for some time, not a long time though just introduce and say hi, then go out to buy stuff to cook together. It always works and is fun when you do things with your woman. Keep it up and while she is checking the pot on the stove, try turning her around and kiss her lips (chai......forget she don melt).

Oh make sure you keep your phone free of old chats with crazy girls (block stubborn ones) and tell your ex(es) you are travelling grin

goodluck

You sound gayy undecided

Poster, Ooh Mpa is happy for you..Buy enough durex..shower might not be enough wink
Sports / Re: 5 Reasons Yaya Toure Should Win 2013 CAF APOTY by OohMpaTM: 9:07pm On Jan 07, 2014
safarigirl: Yaya Toure, is that you? Ejo, you have won this thing 2 times, I know you don't have many trophies so na only CAF dey give you hope, but just free the award for someone else, okay? Don't worry, next year dey.

You'll just have to assasinate Emenike, Enyeama, Aubameyang..but that shouldn't be much of a problem for you

FOH
Go and play ten ten with your friends undecided You know nothing about football

1 Like

Romance / Re: Am Confused On How To Handle My Virginity by OohMpaTM: 5:21pm On Jan 07, 2014
Bro, you better keep your virginity for Holy Guadalupe of st Peter's

Don't embarrass the poor old woman with your 30 secs sprout angry
Sports / Re: 5 Reasons Yaya Toure Should Win 2013 CAF APOTY by OohMpaTM: 4:49pm On Jan 07, 2014
See this clown..
So who should win? Mikel?
because he won nations cup?
because he won Europa league with little or no impact?

Then Ooh Mpa guess that Canaavaro deserves his world best cos he won the world cup? undecided
Or messi didn't because he didn't win la liga after breaking records? undecided

Mention one midfielder in the EPL that's better than Yaya Toure last year and I'll give you 10 that were better than Mikel

You don't play less than half of the games in a full calendar year and expect to get accolades just because you entered the CAF Xi..
Which games will they judge you with? The cup that ended 11 months ago? What happened in the remaining year?
If it's only national achievements, then I woulda given it to Zambia's captain that year na..

The last time I checked, It's not African player with trophy of the year award. The award collates everything and Mikel's trophies just aren't enough to eclipse Yaya's amazing year

2 Likes

Romance / Re: Can One Be In Love With His Or Her Cousin??? by OohMpaTM: 3:26pm On Jan 07, 2014
Give me get number....
She's naughty, Ooh Mpa gonna punish her angry
Romance / Re: Females with Gap tooth vs Females wit Dimples debate by OohMpaTM: 2:44pm On Jan 07, 2014
Booty butt chic: wink cheesy

You with gap tooth and a booty butt chick?

Where you been all of Ooh Mpa's life? cry
Romance / Re: Females with Gap tooth vs Females wit Dimples debate by OohMpaTM: 6:25pm On Jan 06, 2014
ogeoflyf: Oh Eiya sorry. I didn't notice your attempt at being funny initially.
. Dts for you. Calm down

Let's hit the gym together

There's a special called "Breast Clamps". Ooh Mpa is gonna teach you how to use it wink
Romance / Re: I My Wrong ? by OohMpaTM: 6:22pm On Jan 06, 2014
Was there by any chance you spoke your English during forepläy? undecided
Romance / Re: Females with Gap tooth vs Females wit Dimples debate by OohMpaTM: 6:01pm On Jan 06, 2014
ogeoflyf:

New comer. I've seen you.
Oni ibon. Oshi

Instead of you to take Ooh Mpa's advice and hit the gym asap before it's too late, you're here calling yourself "Dimples"

Why can't Nigerian girls take advice?
Romance / Re: Females with Gap tooth vs Females wit Dimples debate by OohMpaTM: 5:31pm On Jan 06, 2014
ogeoflyf:

Whr did dis one come 4rm. are you alryt. undecided

you want to get noticed. Try another method. Total flop.

It's you that's not alright with your fat self that you mistake for dimples

Ooh Mpa doesn't know when obesity became a marker for dimples

1 Like 1 Share

Romance / Re: Does She Really Love Me? by OohMpaTM: 4:11pm On Jan 06, 2014
There's a girl whose birthday is today that Ooh Mpa is fücking. She claims her bf ain't man enough for forepläy.

She also gained admission 3 months ago

*quietly leaves thread* lipsrsealed
Romance / Re: Females with Gap tooth vs Females wit Dimples debate by OohMpaTM: 4:05pm On Jan 06, 2014
ogeoflyf: #team dimples cheesy grin

Which team? with your fat cheeks? undecided

Go and find your team somewhere else, akpu angry

1 Like

Romance / Re: Why Are Many Guys So Weak In Taking Right Decision Whenever They See A Woman? by OohMpaTM: 4:02pm On Jan 06, 2014
Those guys aren't players...They're pûssy whipped

Real players like Ooh Mpa will be begged by his side chick let alone the main girl...
Nairaland / General / Re: 9 People Who Have Extra Body Parts by OohMpaTM: 2:55pm On Jan 06, 2014
2 pussiës? shocked

SWEET!!!!! grin

We need more of this particular anomaly with our Nigerian girls undecided
Romance / Re: Urgent Advice Needed Before I Take A Wrong Step by OohMpaTM: 2:41pm On Jan 06, 2014
Bro, this your chance to be a player and you're here whining like a boy

Ooh Mpa hates boys..

1 Like

Romance / Re: Nairaland Babes Don't Reply Pms!!! Why? by OohMpaTM: 7:33am On Jan 05, 2014
Bro, no offence but you are ugly and you ain't a player

Girls pm ooh Mpa, Ooh Mpa doesn't pm girls wink
Celebrities / Re: Meet Ojb's 3 Wives And 8 Kids by OohMpaTM: 7:15am On Jan 05, 2014
Wowor wives and wahala children

Tell Ooh Mpa why won't He have kidney problems? embarassed
Phones / Re: Sony Xperia Z Or Samsung Galaxy S4: Which Should I Buy? by OohMpaTM: 6:00am On Jan 05, 2014
F.K.O:

DUDE D FONE HAS NO SD SLOT N D BATTERY Z NON REMOVABLE...HOW DO PPLE LIKE DZ KIND OF PHONES SEF ?

16gb? 32gb? I'm perfectly ok with it. I never even use the 32gb sd card for my s4 and I still have almost 3gb to spare? cheesy

Why you wan remove your battery when the battery life is superb and considering, removable ones age faster than the non removable ones.
You even suggested Xperia z for him which is non removable
The only issue here is tampering with the battery script and kernels of the phone via rooting and custom roms...which in this case I don't see that with the poster
That's the reason I won't be able to have that phone cos I'll need to change the battery after I don tamper with am finish

1 Like

Romance / Re: 5 Downsides Of Being Too Cute [from Experience] by OohMpaTM: 10:44pm On Jan 04, 2014
zeemoore:
Mpa, can u pls get Gbafida off my back?

No
You no give me good loving cry
Romance / Re: 5 Downsides Of Being Too Cute [from Experience] by OohMpaTM: 9:46pm On Jan 04, 2014
zeemoore: Thank Goodness Gbafida knows I'm his granny cheesy

<<<<<<<

Oh My Mpa, isn't that blasphemy?

You screamed Jesus, Jesu, Chineke, Oloru., Ubangiji
Ooh Mpa was getting confused lipsrsealed

That's our blasphemy smiley
Romance / Re: Friends,what Do You Think??? by OohMpaTM: 9:30pm On Jan 04, 2014
Relationship is up to weeks and he hasn't seen you nakëd? let alone doing chikichiki? shocked

Until we go broke before you go let us chikichiki?
He has very good intentions..the very best

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