₦airaland Forum

This is sadly the reality of this dispensation. And trust me, it hasn't gotten to the peak yet. Tolerance is no longer a virtue that people have now. The gap between the rich and the poor is now so wide and so what you have in between is a lot of chaos and struggles instead of shared experiences. Sadly, the existence of 'virtual' reality provides an easy way of escape from genuinely labouring on physical connections.

OlorunlobaYusuf:
I want to talk about something nobody really talks about, especially in Nigeria.

Not heartbreak. Not a breakup. Not missing someone specific.

I mean the kind of loneliness where you have people around you — your parents call, your coworkers greet you, your phone has notifications — and still, something inside you feels completely hollow. Like you're watching your own life happen to someone else.

I know someone who lived exactly like this.

Good job. Decent salary. No obvious reason to be falling apart or be depressed. But every single day was the same: wake up, go to work, scan items, go home, open his phone, close his phone, sleep. Repeat. The only thing that felt real was a mobile game and Korean dramas downloaded on night data.

He wasn't dramatic. He wasn't crying in public. He was just... disappearing. Slowly. Quietly. In a self-contain in Ojuelegba, surrounded by twenty million people, with nobody saying his name out loud.

I think a lot of people in relationships also feel this. You can have a partner, a situationship, a roster of situationships — and still feel like nobody actually sees you.

So let me ask directly:

Have you ever been in a relationship — or surrounded by people — and still felt completely alone?

And do you think we even talk about this honestly in Nigeria? Or do we just tell people to pray about it and count their blessings?

Because I genuinely think millions of people are living like this right now. Going through the motions. Feeling empty. Too ashamed to say it out loud because they can't explain why they're not okay.

Where is this ideology coming from? What is your argument?

Sirchiboy:
fastest way to ruin your life as a man is to date a student or Lady b/w 18-25

Good day everyone,
‎
‎I want to share something practical, not theory, not motivation, but a simple system I have seen work in real life.
‎
‎This is for rising married men, intending fathers, and even young men who know they will carry responsibility someday.
‎
‎Let me start from here:
‎
‎Your current financial situation is not your biggest problem.
‎Your biggest problem is not having a system that prepares you for the financial stages ahead and takes you out of your current state.
‎
‎Because whether you like it or not, marriage comes with phases:
‎
‎Pregnancy
‎
‎Childbirth
‎
‎Schooling
‎
‎Feeding
‎
‎Emergencies
‎
‎These things will come. They don’t ask if you are ready.
‎
‎So the real question is, What are you building now that will support you later?
‎Here are two simple wisdom you should consider.
‎
‎1. The “Living Asset” Idea (Very Practical)
‎
‎This is an old system our forefathers understood well.
‎
‎When you have children, instead of just raising them alone, you attach something productive to their lives.
‎
‎For example:
‎
‎If you have 3 children, you can buy:
‎
‎3 female goats
‎
‎1 male goat
‎
‎Keep them.
‎
‎The goal is not to start a farm or stress yourself.
‎The goal is to create something that can reproduce value over time.
‎
‎As the goats give birth:
‎
‎You sell some of the kids
‎
‎Part of the money goes into feeding/maintenance
‎
‎The rest becomes savings or support for your children
‎
‎Over time, you will realize something: You didn’t just raise children…
‎You raised a system alongside them.
‎
‎It doesn’t have to be goats. It can be:
‎
‎Turkey or even local Chickens
‎
‎Any livestock you can manage or that can be managed for you.
‎
‎Yes, there are risks.
‎But tell me one thing in life without risk.
‎
‎
‎2. Investing in Small Local Businesses Around You
‎
‎This one is very powerful, but many people overlook it.
‎
‎Look around your street:
‎
‎That woman selling roasted corn
‎
‎That small food vendor
‎
‎That petty trader
‎
‎
‎Many of them understand business better than we think.
‎What they lack is capital.
‎
‎You can walk up to them respectfully and say:
‎
‎ “I like what you are doing. If I support this business with ₦20,000, what return can you realistically give me weekly or monthly?”
‎
‎Agree clearly.
‎
‎Don’t pressure them.
‎Don’t over-expect.
‎Don’t disturb their operations.
‎
‎Just position yourself quietly.
‎
‎You will be surprised how consistent some of these small businesses are.
‎
‎But Let Me Warn You
‎
‎This system is not for everybody.
‎
‎If you Lack patience, always desperate for quick money, Like controlling everything, Cannot delay gratification,
‎
‎Then leave it.
‎
‎Because you will MOST LIKELY spoil it.
‎
‎This kind of approach requires:
‎
‎Discipline
‎
‎Understanding
‎
‎Long-term thinking
‎
‎See, you don’t need millions to start securing your family’s future.
‎
‎What you need is the wisdom to take the little you have and tie it to something that can grow.
‎
‎Because the truth is:
‎Time wont wait for you
‎Responsibilities won't stop because you lack.
‎Children will grow.
‎Expenses will keep increasing
‎
‎The only question is, Will you meet it prepared… or surprised?
‎
‎Think about it.

Yes, it is easy to say 'fear women' but apparently you can't blame the woman. And let me just start with this, the woman has nothing to loose at this point. It's just the bitter truth. However, the danger here is that the supposed counsellor is aware of the pregnancy. The only thing you can do is to psychologically prepare your friend for the inevitable....he has a problem! Is he ready to fix it or will he settle for what life gives him? This life is woven with secrets that may never become open. So, as for the woman, this is no longer a secret. You know and the owner of the pregnancy knows, Now, she will have to face the consequences of her stupidity and not the pregnancy. Yours it to help make sure it is well played and received.
But, don't be mistaken, your friend has a lot, I mean a lot to consider and work on!

LoneSoldier:
I have been away from Nairaland for over a year now, focusing on my life and career. I didn’t plan to come back here, but what I witnessed this past weekend has left me trembling. I cannot keep this secret alone; it is eating me alive.

My close friend, Tunde (not his real name), has been married for 7 years without a child. The guy has spent millions on fertility treatments, herbs, and prayers. The wife always told me Tunde was the "problem" but that he refused to go for a clinical sperm test out of "male pride." I always pitied her and encouraged Tunde to go, but he remained stubborn.

The Timeline of the Betrayal:

Friday Evening: I met them at a lounge in Ikeja to celebrate. Tunde was over the moon, buying drinks for everyone. He told me, "Lonesoldier, God has finally remembered me!" He was even showing me the baby clothes and a stroller he already bought.

Saturday Afternoon: The wife called me, sounding very troubled. We met privately because she knows I am Tunde’s closest confidant. She broke down crying and confessed: She is 3 months pregnant, but the baby belongs to their Church Marriage Counselor.

The Reason: She said she "helped" Tunde because he is "useless" in that department and she couldn't wait any longer.

The Cover-up: She told me the Counselor himself advised her to keep the secret to "maintain peace in the home" and give Tunde the joy of fatherhood, even if it’s a lie.

I haven't been able to sleep. Every time I see Tunde’s WhatsApp status with "Thank You Jesus" captions, I feel like vomiting. If I tell him, I will destroy a 7-year marriage and a man's joy. If I don't, I am watching my brother raise a marriage counselor's child as a fool.

Men of Nairaland: Is "peace" worth this kind of paternity fraud?
Women of Nairaland: How can a woman be this cold-hearted after 7 years of loyalty?

Lalasticlala, Mynd44, Seun... please move this to FP. This is a serious matter. I need matured advice on whether to speak up or mind my business. Trust is officially dead.

Fear Women!

Chully01:
I'm interested ooo

Are you still interested?

Let me say this calmly but truthfully.

In a country like Nigeria, where systems are fragile and opportunities are unevenly distributed, you would expect young people to cling to structures that create collective strength. Yet when you mention cooperative societies, you often see hesitation, doubt, even silent resistance.

So the question is simple:

If you believe in cooperatives, why do you love them?

And if you don’t, why?

From my observations, the divide usually comes from three places.

First is trust deficit.
Many young Nigerians have seen mismanagement, failed thrift schemes, or leaders who turned “collective wealth” into personal advantage. Once trust is broken, anything that looks like pooled money feels risky.

Second is get-rich-quick conditioning.
We are in a generation that celebrates fast money. Cooperative systems are structured, disciplined, and long-term. They require patience. And patience is no longer fashionable.

Third is lack of proper education about what a modern cooperative really is.
A properly structured cooperative is not “ajo.” It is not random contribution. It is organized capital formation. It is leverage. It is structured access to credit. It is shared risk. It is shared growth.

Now, for those who love cooperatives, I’ve noticed their reasons are different:

They value structure over noise. They understand the power of collective bargaining. They see it as a disciplined wealth-building tool. They understand that community multiplies capacity.

In developed economies, cooperative systems quietly own farms, banks, housing blocks, and commodity chains. Here, we often dismiss what we have not fully understood.

So this is a genuine public opinion moment.

If you subscribe to the cooperative model, why?
What has it done for you?

If you don’t, what holds you back?
Past experience? Fear? Lack of clarity? Independence mindset?

There are people reading who may be one decision away from either structured growth or continued financial isolation.

Let’s talk openly.

Your perspective matters.

Still needed . It is a good deal you won't regret.

There is nothing you can do to satisfy a made woman that lacks wisdom. Even a level 2 or less woman who brazenly challenges the ego or pride of her man can not keep such a man. The working formula remains love+submission and not love+equality. Any slight change or modifications to this formula will certainly cause chaos.

Vehicle is Still needed

There is a business proposal for this. It is practical and realistic.

A reliable and responsible gentleman is currently in need of a vehicle to operate on Uber or Bolt.

He has flexible time availability and intends to use the vehicle strictly for ride-hailing, with consistent remittance on a weekly or monthly basis, depending on the agreed structure.

He is also open to a drive-to-own arrangement under clear and mutually beneficial terms.

If you have a vehicle available for this purpose or are open to such an arrangement, kindly indicate your interest so discussions can proceed.

Serious and structured conversations only.

Do you have an apartment or space to share with a very gentle and honorable fellow around Ajah? Pls comment below and I will reach out. It is urgently needed.

Hey there! Ever thought of investing in a business that guarantees steady returns? Here’s your chance to grab a slice of an already thriving bread-making business that's on the verge of expansion!

We’re offering just one or two smart investors the opportunity to own 10% equity each in this fast-growing business for a sum of ₦250,000. This is more than an investment—it’s a pathway to lifetime profits. Bread is a daily necessity, and as demand continues to rise, so will your returns!

With our projected growth, your investment could yield a solid 20-30% return within the first year, and that’s only the beginning as we scale.

This offer is extremely limited, so if you're ready to make your money work for you, send me a message today, and let’s talk about how you can become part of this success story!
07088sixty2eight36

soccerlite:
Ibadan jobs are 25k, 30k, 40k

Nawa O

Na serious matter o. I guess it's one of the reasons many of the employers are not proud to even publicize their own job oppurtunities.

ogashman:
This is deep...do u mind sharing what happened?

Yeah it is really deep.

It was inspired by a true life story. And it is the story of a man whose wife reached her limit in their darkest moments and chose to romance with another thereby becoming a thorn to the man. When he needed her encouragement the most, she became his most vicious critic, always complaining about his inadequacies and boldly alluded to finding solace in the arm of another man. The man tried to forgive and he believed he has. But now that things are good and he is pressed to commit some sensitive responsibilities to the wife, he realized he can't just bring himself to trust her. He would rather, commit to his mother(but for old age) than commit to the wife because she has proven her worth and it is disheartening.

I can relate with his pain.

Day169:
See how adversity can make one discover gems of talent hidden in the mind, all the while.
.. beautifully tragic!

😃😃😃😃

Adversity remains the true revealer of potentials and that is infact one of the points of the poet.
In the third stanza, the poet talks about how the wife choose to stab him in their darkest moments or moment of adversity. Which reveals the true nature of her love all the while.

ChybuzzDD:
A man shouldn't be lamenting over woman's lack of love or attention, unless he's abjectly poor.

There are more important and intriguing things to focus on as a man

You are right.

Regardless, it's no crime for a man to pour out his emotions, not moving on is the crime. Some heal by expressing their pains while most men die early because of bottled up emotions.

Even as a man, a man is still a man and human.

*Urgently needed for immediate employment*

PLEASE READ TO THE END

1. Hotel Supervisor #40k (Agbowo, Ibadan)

2. Office Assistant #30k (Bodija, Ibadan)

3. Fashion stylist 40k Yemetu, Ibadan

4. Laundry boy 25k | night shift only (Agbowo, Ibadan)

5. Office Secretary #30k (Yemetu, Ibadan)

6. Marketer, Eye Clinic #50k (Ring Road)

7. Marketer, Pharmacy and Healthcare Services 50k female only (Eleyele and Ring Road, Ibadan)

8. Full time Pharmacist 150k (Mokola, Ringroad, Eleyele and sasa, Ibadan)

9. Pharmarcist Technician 40k - 60k (Ringroad and Eleyele, Ibadan)

10. Professional Hairstylist (Akobo) Accommodation available

11. Eye lash and microbalding technician (Akobo) Accomodation available

12. Business Development Executive (Female preferred) 80/100k
Must be a graduate and have client management skills. (Aare, Bodija)

13. Nail Technician (Akobo) Accommodation available

14. Driver 100k (Lekki, Lagos)

15. Laundry collection staff 25k (Ashi)

16. Cashier 25k (Leadcity University)

17. Store keeper OND Accountancy 40/50k (Leadcity University)

18. Massue for the spa (Sango, Ibadan)

19. Pedicurist (Sango, Ibadan)

20. Stylist that can do frontal perfectly (Sango, Ibadan)

Candidates must be willing to resume immediately.

Chat with Dapo on 08026698109
Send only WhatsApp chat only (❌No calls please)
Indicate the exact position you are interested in.

Please note that T&C applies

Job title: Farm Officer

Method of Application

Interested and qualified candidates should send their CV to: jobszilt at gmail dot com using the Job Title as the subject of the email.

Job Type: Full-time

Pay: ₦80,000.00 - ₦100,000.00 per month

Source: Glassdoor

I am not pleased that many employers of labour in Ibadan rarely post Vacancy opportunities online.
Why?
Well, I can point to a number of reasons but that is not the goal of this thread.

If you are an employer or an agent or a worker in an organization that has vacancy, kindly do well to post available vacancies under this thread. But, only for jobs available in Ibadan.

Job seekers can also share their experiences here with job givers.

In the shadows of betrayal's sting,
My heart's lament begins to sing.
A tale of love, once bright and true,
Now tainted by a love askew.

Forgiveness sought, but hard to find,
As memories haunt my troubled mind.
The vows we spoke, now torn apart,
A dagger plunged into my heart.

For better or for worse we swore,
Yet love's fidelity she chose to ignore.
In darkest hour, when I needed her most,
She turned away, a ghostly ghost.

The pain runs deep, like rivers wide,
A constant ache, no place to hide.
Will time's gentle touch ever erase,
The scars of betrayal, the lines on my face?

I long for peace, for solace's embrace,
To heal the wounds, to find my grace.
But until that day, I'll carry the weight,
Of love betrayed, of trust, too late.

It is no more news that marriages have lows and high time and several events take place that makes couples feel so much pressure and feel choked in marriage. And of course, the usual line of action is to find 'solace' in some available shoulders.

However, gone are the days when these available shoulders understand boundaries and even though they may be 'providing succour' to the wife or husband, they still at least understand certain boundaries. For instance, for no reason will I keep a married woman on the phone at night(especially anything from 8.30pm) when she is under her husband's roof no matter how close we are. It is a brocode law for me.

But how come these days, you will find another married man, engaging another married woman under the roof of her husband on calls deep into the hours of the night?

Here is my thought, if a woman were to be having issues with her husband(aside from physical attack o) and she calls me at night when she should be on bed with the husband ,is it not reasonable for me to encourage the woman to put efforts into resolving the issue rather than cowardly running into my arms for solace at least for that night by simply postponing our calls till day time?


Or even if there were to be no issues, does it not look odd to be deeply engaged in cozzy calls with a married fellow in the deep of the night?

I am just wondering if I am overthinking this or perhaps it is just that people don't care anymore about these things?

There is no new experience in any marriage. You are only experiencing your Ina different way and at a different time.

Your biggest mistake will be to die in silence.

And it is a capital error to seek solace or advise from a single, an ex or a suitor if your intention is truly to make your marriage work.

How true is the saying that no third party should be allowed in a marriage? Is the saying figurative or literary? And how genuinely practical is it?

I have noticed that nobody cares about the wellbeing of married people but they are always quick to make fun of their woes when they err.

Most married persons are lonely just like myself. And for many they are just dying silently because they wouldn't want to be stigmatized while for others they result to secret affairs. it doesn't necessarily have to be that way.

There is no great marriage without its lows and to be candid, love alone is not enough in a marriage because human wants are insatiable.

Over familiarity and see finish coupled with lack of wisdom and understanding in ones spouse causes many couples to drift apart and Sometimes we just want to feel that spark; that ingenuity of love; we just want to feel naughty and not be judged. But where that is impossible with your spouse, only a genuine friend can feel some of those voids.

I have so many things to write but let me just nip it here.

I am looking for an intelligent and highly conversational chatmate, preferably someone who is also married. No hookups, just purely chatmates.

If you are interested, DM me.

meanwhile, this is also a thread strictly for married fellows who are looking for a conversational buddy. if you decide to take it beyond being chatmates, you are in your own o.

adventurer2018:
I'm a gentleman in his twenties, of Yoruba descent.

I'm an introvert, writer, resourceful individual, and a chat freak.
The last one year of my life had been all about myself, work, family and freelance projects, and I discovered I'm now very bored of the same routine.

I'm searching for a chat mate who might be from anywhere, but who surely love to interract with person of another world.

I will prefer someone in Ibadan or Southwest but I'm most interested in someone who love to have genuine conversation and that we can work on quite a number of projects together. Any interested person can send me a DM.

PS: I think a little bit about might tell you more about my type of person. I have great flair for writing and reading, love to talk about life and career majorly, love to be organized, love nature, and a virgo.

Is this open to same gender too?

amSTARboy:
Low cost of maintenance
Durable
Easy to fix

If you want to buy a Nigerian used vehicle, go to the North. It’s usually well maintained. Just do your due diligence and ensure the papers are genuine

Where in the north? Do you have a plug there?

Hardeywhumy:
Our weaners at pork.nwingsfarm are very affordable
It's ranges from 35k upward
Because we serves the best
And only deals with exotic breeds

Thank you. At least now, I know what to budget for.

tocin44:
I am planning to start a small poultry behind my house and would appreciate suggestions from people with experience here on the best breeds to go with.

What I'm looking for;

1. Easy to care for and not requiring too much attention.

2. Breed that is resilient.

3. Breed that can possibly produce small amounts of eggs for family consumption.

4. Can be fed with anything, leftovers, basically not requiring spending much on feed, even if I'll have to.

5. Can grow to a reasonable size for consumption (at least bigger than our regular local breeds)

Suggestions please.
Hoping I and others can learn from the experienced nairalanders. Thank you. 🙏 🙂

Then your answer is noiler or chickerite dual.