Na waah oh my people.
News has it that OBJ, BABANGIDA and PMB were on a plane going on a state tour and a conversation occurred:

OBJ: If i throw away one note of 1k out of the window I could make on Nigerian happy.

Babangida: Well I will rather throw 2 5h notes out of the window and make two Nigerian happy.

PMB: You guys are corrupt; kai i will throw 100 pcs of 5Naira Note out of the window and make 100 Nigerian happy.


Pilot: will overhearing their conversation said: Sirs; I could throw three of you out of the window and make more than 150 million Nigerians happy!

Vote wisely:

A for OBJ
B for Babangida
C for PMB
D for Pilot.

Have your Say!

My name is Edward. I generally function under the persona of 'Pastor Edward'. That's because I am a priest. Apart from being a priest I am also a Geologist and all-round youth educator. I am also a 'youth worker' of sorts.

In some places in the world I would be granted an enormous amount of respect because I am a priest. In this community, I find; I receive more respect that I deserve on account of my reputation for educating people. I personally believe that the only role in that list that really demands respect is the one of 'Youth Worker' Working with young people is hard. I am a young person too. I am hard young person to work with. I was a difficult student at school. I went on to be an argumentative University student and then a troublesome student pastor. I've left behind me a whole string of academic institutions that have been somewhat glad to see the back of me. Now I've been working with hard and difficult young people from campus to streets, from east to North and now in the West- Lagos for the last twelve years (which may be God's way of bringing me back from my own youthful exorbitances. Some of the young people I've worked with have really got their lives together and gone on to do bigger and better things with their life. A number of them have died - mainly from overdoses, carelessness and sexual vises, but also from unrepentant heart toward God their creator. Others I'm still working with. They're just not quite as young as they used to be.

People ask me all the time 'Pastor Edward, what do you think is the biggest problem facing young people today'. Most people think I am going to answer 'drugs'. I do not consider drugs to be the biggest problem young people are facing today. That's not because I don't think drugs are a big problem. I've worked with a lot of drug-addicted young people over the years from campus to campus. I have been robbed and manipulated by them, and I have watched many of them. Even so, I do not consider drugs to be the biggest problem plaguing our young people. Some people think 'violence' is the biggest problem facing young people, and I am conscious of the fact that for young guys (in particular) problems of violence can still be a major issue. Violence is not nearly so big a problem in my area as it was five years ago. Problems of violence are alive and well in Lagos Street, and National Campuses. Even so, I do not consider violence to the biggest problem facing young people. Some people think in terms of lack of employment opportunities as the major issue. Others would speak in terms of family breakdown or problems of prejudice - all real issues. Personally though, I believe that the biggest problem facing our young people today is something a little less tangible. Personally I think the biggest problem I see with our young people is that most of them don't feel themselves to be a part of anything that is bigger than themselves.

Most young people I meet have tragically small horizons, very little ambition, and hence live in very tiny worlds. When I ask teenagers about what they would really like to do with their lives if they could do anything at all, most others speak in terms of getting something, whether that something be a horse or a car or a girl or just 'a lot of money'.

No one I speak to says 'If I could do anything I wanted I'd find a cure for cancer' or 'I'd negotiate a peace deal in the country. And this reflects, I believe, the fact that most young people I know have very narrow horizons. Indeed, most young persons I know seem to live in worlds that are not much bigger than themselves.

Go back a couple of generations and most indigenous Nigerians were ready to lay down their lives for their King and Tribes. You wouldn't find many young people today willing to sacrifice themselves for President and country. You won't find many young people who have any real sense of loyalty to the community or to the country. Indeed, if you ask most young people what it means to be a Nigerian, you won't generally get a reply that contains any ideals.

There are positives as well as negatives in this equation of course. Strong patriotism often goes hand in hand with strong prejudice against people of other nationalities. And our Nigerian cynicism towards our governing bodies at least means that we're not easily fooled by political propaganda. Even so, the downside of our 'loss of national identity' means that we've been thrust back upon ourselves and upon our peers to find some sense of personal identity.

Now if you're following me here at all you may well be thinking 'Yeah, Pastor Edward thinks that because he's working with a group of no good loser negative traits addicts. Hell, I don't know what happened to him since he left Bible School, but that guy has been on a one-way downwardly mobile trip. Over here we've really got it all together.' Yeah? I don't know.

One of the most depressing groups of young people I've encountered in the past few years has been at the last Senior Secondary School where I thought Geography in Northern Nigeria. As I thought in different government run selective high school. I won't say which one. NOT THIS ONE! When I first started attending classes in each school there I asked the whole class 'what did they want to be when they finished school?', and almost every person there would say different things. some, said 'a lawyer', many said ‘a doctor’ and few opt for ‘farmer’.

Now people, maybe I've been prejudiced over the years by the enormous amount of time I've spent in juvenile courts and in visiting the prison system, but it seems to me that if we're really on about building a better Nigeria, the last thing we need is more lawyers!

Now I know I shouldn't be black and white about this, but when I went around and asked young people 'why do you want to be a lawyer?' Some of them answered 'because my dad is a lawyer' or something like that, but MOST of them said that it was because being a lawyer was a 'good job', by which they mean what ….? A job that can help a lot of people? NO! When people say a 'good job' they mean a job that makes a lot of money.

There was a time when we used to speak of the 'idealism of youth'. What's happened to that? When did youthful idealism get replaced by this 'I want to make a lot of money' mentality? Why do people who should know better want to make a 'lot of money'? Is it because you think you need a lot of money in order to survive? You don't! Is it because you think 'if I have a lot of money I will be really important and people will look up to me?' GET A LIFE.

Friends I do not think that there is any greater tragedy in this community than a highly trained intelligent young person who has all the gifts and abilities necessary to really make a difference in this society, but who has no idea where to direct those gifts and abilities. It's like having a powerful loaded weapon and not caring where it's aiming when it goes off. This is the tragedy: that most of our young people, I fear, drug-addicted and non drug-addicted, well educated as well as less well educated, winners as well as losers, live a life wherein 'my life is basically about me'. That's a tragedy.

I see a similar tragedy taking place in the lives of so many of our young people who really have no hopes, dreams or ambitions in this life that go beyond themselves. What a small life to live! It's like trying to beautify the wallpaper in your own solitary cell! It's this loss of idealism that I see as the greatest scourge afflicting our young people today, and my response to this situation is to teach these young people to fight, which might not seem like the most obvious solution to the dilemma to everybody. The relevance of fighting to an individual's value system might not be immediately obvious to everyone, but I do seriously believe that pugilism and idealism are intricately linked. The bottom line is that I know that it all works.

I know that I've had an almost 100% success rate when it comes to taking in guys who have serious societal problems or violence problems, that by the time I get them to the side of the ring for a serious fight, they are no longer having problems with stuffs like that or violence or any of those things, but have actually developed a real sense of who they are and what they are on about. I know it works. I'm not sure I fully understand why it works, but I would note that if you go back to Plato's Republic, to the wisdom of the Ancient Greeks, you'll find that Socrates assigned a very high place to the value of 'themos', which we translate as 'aggression' or 'fighting spirit'.

According to Socrates, no individual and no society is complete without properly developed 'themos'. Individuals and societies need to know how to fight if they are going to know real harmony and real justice. The other authority I would appeal to today is Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain: " The consciousness of belonging, vitally, to something beyond individuality … greatens the heart to the limit of the soul's ideal, and builds out the supreme of character."

Chamberlain writes this out of his experience in the American Civil War - one of the most terrible wars in history. Chamberlain was, ironically, a contemporary and a colleague of William Tecumseh Sherman who coined the phrase 'war is hell' and I don't think Chamberlain would have necessarily disagreed with Sherman. But Chamberlain also found that, for all its horror, war had one very positive side effect - it gave people a sense of belonging to something that was greater than themselves and so it could bring out the best in people. Of course Chamberlain isn't the only person who’s seen this. My old dears at the church used to say it all the time. "What these young people need is a good war" they used to say. Now they weren't stupid, and they knew as well as anyone else that the last thing we really need is a 'good war', but their point was that they felt young people needed some experience like they'd had in their youth, where they were forced to work together with a broad range of people across the community and to make sacrifices together as they committed themselves to a cause which was something far bigger than any of them as individuals.

Perhaps fighting is not your thing. That's OK. Find another way to get in touch with your ideals and values. Spend more time in church. Head up on a mountain by yourself for a couple of months and just think and pray about it. That works for some people. Just don't be content with a life that has no greater horizon than your own wealth and self-importance. We live in an extraordinary society in an extraordinary period in human history. Think about it. At how many other points in history, and in how many other places in the world, have any group of people ever had the degree of choice about the future that we have today. Think about it. The rest of your life lies before you and you can really choose to do with it just about anything you want to! Your options are really only limited by your imagination and your genetic potential. At how many times and places in human history has that been true? If you were born a few generations back in a village you wouldn't have had these sorts of choices. Your dad was the village Smithy, so that's what you were going to be. If you were born on a farm you were probably going to stay on that farm until you died. If you were a teenage girl you probably already had a couple of kids by now and your path was fully set.

We're at the opposite end of the spectrum now. If you decide to spend the rest of your life entirely devoted to playing your guitar you can do it. You may become a great rock star, but even if you don't you won't starve. Though our government has no safety net that will still support you in the end so that you can keep doing nothing but guitar playing if that's what you really want. Think about that. If you decide to devote the rest of your life to scientific research you can do that. If that's your vision and you're determined, nobody is going to stop you from giving your life to that. If you want to devote your life to feeding the hungry and healing the sick you can do that, or if you just want to sit around on your bum all day too, you can do that too! The choice is yours. But this is our dilemma. Never before in human history have we had such a wonderful variety of choices before us, and never before, I fear, have we had so little idea of what we should choose.

One final illustration from a Fuel Subsidy Protest March: I trust that plenty of you guys made it to the January 2012 Fuel Subsidy Protest March and good on you. Let me mention to you one placard that I heard about at a march. I didn't see it but was told about it. It said "nothing is worth dying for". I thought that this was very clever at first, but then it occurred to me if fuel is worth dying for, is anything worth living for? Friends, I believe that there are things worth living and dying for. Find out what they are and live them! Live your life to the full. Fight the good fight. Keep the faith. And the blessing of God Almighty - the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit - be amongst you and remain with you always. Amen!

From Pastor Edward Freedom
(The Apostle of Restoration)

Source: http://lifeboatmarriageschool..com.ng/2015/09/the-real-problem-with-todays-youths.html

Sexuality should be viewed as something beautiful between a married man and woman and regarded without feelings of shame or guilt. When we feel guilty or shameful for something we did sexually that means we are doing something wrong and against our moral conscience. The lax views and attitudes of our young people today about sexuality has become extremely unsafe and hazardous to their own sexuality, especially since the arrival of HIV and AIDS in our society. Having a laissez-faire attitude towards our sexuality has contributed to numerous issues and problems within our society that have damaged the sanctity of family and marriage.

[b]LOVE VS. LUST[/b]

LOVE is kind = considerate, caring, giving, thoughtful, understanding

Lust is envy = jealous, greed, spite, resentment,

LOVE is not proud = humble, submissive, meek, modest

Lust is self-seeking = selfish, rebellious, rude, egotistical, hateful,

LOVE rejoices in the truth = God is love, Love is God = Wisdom, Holy Spirit,

Lust delights in evil = Satan, sin, wicked, iniquitous, immoral, and dishonest

Sexual immorality is a temptation we all must face on a daily basis. God doesn’t forbid sexual sins just to be difficult. God knows its power to destroy people’s lives physically and spiritually. God wants to protect us from damaging ourselves with immoral sexual desires. Sex outside of the marriage relationship always hurts someone. It hurts God because it shows that we care more about our own lustful desires than Him.
Paul said in Corinthians, “Do you not know that your body is the a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price (Jesus Christ death freed us from sin). Therefore, honor God with your body” 1 Corinthians 6: 19-20

Many people believe they have the right to do whatever they want with their own bodies. And they think this is freedom, but really, they are enslaved to their own lustful and sinful desires – they are in bondage and a slave to their own lustful desires and this is a negative and destructive way to view sexuality.

The world has been given moral principles for very good reasons - biblical principles are our stepping-stones towards eternal life with God. When we have a healthy attitude about our sexuality and when we learn to respect others and their bodies we can be free to actually love others wholly and completely without sexual temptations getting in the way. God created all the principles we need to live healthy, productive, sexually pure lives right here on earth.
We must teach our youth about sexual abstinence until marriage and the purity of marriage.

I am Pastor Edward Freedom. I love you all.

Jesus says we need to forgive others—many, many times over. The reason for this is simple, really -- other people, no matter who they are, strangers on the street, or the person we are married to, will do and say things that will often hurt us in some way.

Let’s set it in our mind that we need to detach with forgiveness for our own well-being and peace.

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14

Do you find it hard to let go of the past and forgive your spouse, and loved ones? And, if you do forgive them, do you still feel angry or sad over it?

Many times you might think you have forgiven your spouse only for the pain in your heart to come back and haunt you. It hurts so badly, even though you tried to forgive you just can’t seem to forget! This happens because you haven’t forgiven at all, at least not with your heart and soul.

Forgiveness involves letting go of negative thoughts you have been carrying around with you.

What happens when you are filled with negative feelings? Your emotional state of mind becomes trapped and can't get out. The real you is intent to wallow in self-induced resentment. Resentment is so powerful that it controls your state of mind and how you react to people and view the world around you.

For instance you come home from work to find your husband already home, lounging around in his favorite chair, watching TV, while you still need to clean the house, cook dinner, give the baby a bath, and give your husband some sex. But you’re tired NOW and haven’t even started on any of those household things you need to do.

Or you come home from work to find your wife getting ready to go out with her friends and she is dressing nicer for her friends then she does for you. You haven’t figured out why she does this but you feel left out and jealous because your wife doesn’t dress that nice for you, right?
What is going to happen?
You are going to see your spouse differently. They will give the impression of being something unattractive to you, according to what your thoughts are. You are going to feel negative things towards him or her because when you come home you feel completely overwhelmed with things that you got to do, and when you see the man you married comfortably relaxing, watching TV, you feel resentment and anger towards him. Or when you see your wife looking pretty for her friends you wonder who else she is trying to look pretty for?

What is the real problem?
The real problem here is that you have pent up issues that haven’t been discussed between you and your spouse. The real issue here is that you feel wronged in some way, and you haven’t quite forgiven them for that wrong because you are hurting.
Maybe you haven’t forgiven because you just don’t talk anymore.
Forgiving properly, the way Jesus intended is letting go of negative feelings that you have for someone, so you can begin to grow and come out of yourself.

When you forgive others for their wrongs, you are doing yourself a favor by freeing yourself from the negativity. When you take care of yourself FIRST and detach from that which is negative, those around you will most likely find a solution to their problem and do likewise. No one wants to be alone in his or her troubles.
By forgiving another for what we think they might have done to us, we continue in our growth process, instead of stalling and rummaging in resentment and negative feelings.Let’s forgive!

First of all, understand, you're only

So, how can you forgive?

hurting yourself and your spouse by harboring unpleasant feelings toward them. This creates more resentment, which causes you to perceive your spouse in a negative light. Everything he or she does makes you feel disgusted, angry, abused, letdown, scared, sick; etc.
In all reality, you have allowed your emotions to dictate your actions and control your thoughts about your spouse. That is why you cannot forgive! You really don’t want to forgive.

The hurt hurts. The hurt tells you to forgive but your feelings have taken the lead and have overwritten the ability to forgive completely. Your feelings are set on default. Default to come alive every time you start to hurt again. Do you get it?
Your spouse did the wrong, not you, but because you have not forgiven, you have obtained a hardened heart towards him or her, which is so very detrimental to the marriage.

The next time your spouse does anything, even minor, like relaxing in his favorite chair instead of taking out the garbage, forgiveness will become even harder to achieve. It's a vicious cycle that never goes away unless you just LET IT GO!
Jesus called this “turning the other cheek”. If we can turn the other cheek to our enemies, those we don’t like, how hard can it be to turn the other cheek towards our spouse?

The first step in forgiving is to start talking again when issues happen in the marriage, don’t wait until the moon is full again, and don’t put stuff on the back burner either! Learn to deal with marriage issues and life’s troubles as they come, and do not procrastinate.
The sooner problems get hashed out the better it is for your spiritual health!


Explain to your spouse why they offended you. Express yourself in a calm manner about how YOU FEEL. Don’t tell them how they feel. Do not finger point, blame, and harass your spouse.
Say, “I feel that you have been cold and distant lately, and I feel that you don’t care about me like you used to.”
Don’t say, “You don’t care about me anymore, you have been cold and distant.”
Say, “I feel like all you want is sex, that is the only time you touch me anymore.”
Don’t say, “All you want is sex, you never touch me anymore.”
Remember, your feelings are your feelings. Your thoughts are your thoughts. Don’t define you spouse by telling them how they feel or why they do the things they do.

Next, enlighten your spouse by explaining how you will pray for the heavy burden of this wrong to be taken off your shoulders. After all, why should you bear the consequences of someone else's actions?
God says He will lift the heavy-laden burdens from you if you trust in him. Freeing the hardened heart allows for forgiveness to take place.
We can be so much better people for one another other when we just let the past go and live for today, and love!
Open your heart and forgive today.

The apostle Peter asked Jesus, "Lord how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Till seven times?" Jesus said unto Peter, " I say not unto thee, not seven times: but, until seventy times seven.

Why do you think Jesus wants us to keep forgiving over and over again? I think it is because He wants us to love. He wants us to grow and learn about ourselves, so we can be helpful to our partners and other people around us. How can we be useful to others when we are constantly holding grudges and sustaining a negative spirit against them?
Christ's forgiveness is unconditional. He never places conditions on His love or forgiveness for us by saying, "I will forgive you only if you change," apologize or do what I want." Christ is ready to be hurt seventy times seven times and still forgive us. Wow!
We are to forgive others as God has forgiven us!

Detach With Love For Forgiveness to Take Place

To forgive completely, you must release yourself from accepting the sins of your spouse. And, you must detach from the thoughts you are feeling from the sin your spouse committed. If you do this wholeheartedly you will be able to forgive them.

Remember that only discussing a problem with your spouse doesn't necessarily free you from the feelings of bitterness and resentment. You must forgive your spouse from within yourself to be free in heart, mind and soul.

When you allow yourself freedom from another's burden, your spirit awakens from within and allows you to use it for the good in every aspect of your life. Because you are free to be yourself without allowing your emotions to dictate your actions.
Once you have learned how to forgive properly by not soaking in the consequences of your spouse’s actions, they too, will begin to see that he or she is only doing these things to themselves. When you detach yourself from their weakness, instead of being the spongy spouse you have been, it will inevitably grab at their conscience and make them realize that they are alone in their behavior.
Let me reiterate this again--when we detach ourselves from negative feelings and actions, we don't take the abuse.

Detaching doesn't mean that you don’t love your spouse or that you must be cruel to them. On the contrary, when you detach yourself from negative behavior and feelings from within your spirit, it allows you to truly love who you married the way God intended you to love them, with no conditions set upon your love for them!!

At first, detaching from your spouse in this way may seem unkind to you, but it is not. You are being unkind to your spouse by not forgiving them!
We can only help others After we have helped ourselves first.

It is so very possible to leave all the excess baggage of resentment, anger and bitterness behind, so we can forgive and then love unconditionally!


I am Pastor Edward Freedom, I am willing to Pray with you if to want. I want to see you happy again and restored.

I am Pastor Edward Freedom, and I am here to tell you from my own experience that only those willing to forgive can truly enjoy the blessedness of marriage.
God did not give me a perfect wife, neither will He give you one. My wife have her Strong points and also her weak points. i have mine too. It is both our strong points and weak points that makes us who we are, and that is what makes us humans too.

The truth is that, if I find it difficult to forgive her when she is at the weak point of her life, i will also find it difficult to celebrate her when she is at the strong point of her life.

In my marriage, my strength fills in the gap where my wife's weak points are, and her own strength does the same for me. I have also sat down to see that some of the things that hurts me about her are also a blessing in disguise at a carting issues and God have also used her weakness to bless my home at times. For an instance, I have had to that God for my wife's anger and outburst over issues sometimes. God have used it to help us a times.

so my people. God have not given you a partner in marriage that you can not handle. If you cannot forgive, you may not see or enter the next fase of blessing God have for you.

I am willing to pray with you if you need it.

when God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window.

I was there live. my shop is No 96 bajulaye road, just very close to the burnt building.
No life was lost and none sustained injury. it was a story building just at Bajulaye last bus stop. story has it that the fire started as a result of one of the tenants who was cooking and the gas cylinders lock pulled out and that was it . . . vuuuuum!!!

latter though the Lagos state fire device came and the fire was curtailed from claiming the whole building. only the up was razed. please gas users, be careful. no room for carelessness.
God help us all! Amen!

10 Marriage Tips Every WIFE Needs to Hear


Respect your husband. - Notice how it doesn’t say “Respect your husband if he has earned it”. A man’s greatest need in this world is to be respected, and the person he desires that respect from the most is his wife. The trap that we’ve all been ensnared by is that they only deserve our respect when they earn it. Yes, we want our husbands to make decisions that will ultimately garner our respect, but the truth is that your husband is a human being. A human being who makes mistakes. This is the man that YOU have chosen to walk alongside you for the rest of your life, and to lead your family and he needs to be respected for that quality alone. Take it from me – when respect is given even when he doesn’t deserve it, it will motivate him to earn it. That doesn’t mean you pretend that his choices are good ones when they aren’t. Things like that still need to be communicated, but you can flesh out your differences WITH RESPECT. It makes all the difference in the world to him.

Guard your heart. - The grass is not greener on the other side. Do not believe the lie that with a slimmer figure, a higher salary, a faster car, or a bigger house, you will be a happier woman. The world is full of things and people that will serve as reminders that you don’t have the best of the best, but it’s simply not true. Live the life you’ve been blessed with, and BE THANKFUL. I get that we all have struggles, and there are even times when I would love 1,000 more square feet of house to live in, but square feet is not fulfilling – relationships are. Guard your heart from things and people that will try to convince you that your life or your husband is not good enough. There will always be bigger, faster, stronger, or shinier – but you’ll never be satisfied with more until you’re fulfilled with what you have now.

God, husband, kids…in that order. - I know this isn’t a popular philosophy, especially among mothers, but hear me out. It’s no secret that my faith is of utmost importance, so God comes first in my life no matter what. But regardless of your belief system, your husband should come before your kids. Now unless you’re married to someone who is abusive (in which case, I urge you to seek help beyond what my blog can give you), no man in his right mind would ask you to put your kids aside to serve his every need while neglecting them. That’s not what this means. When you board an airplane, the flight attendants are required to go over emergency preparedness prior to takeoff. When explaining the part about how to operate the oxygen mask, passengers are instructed to first put the mask on themselves before putting it on their small child. Is that because they think you are more important than your kids? Absolutely not. But you cannot effectively help your child if you can’t breathe yourself. The same holds true with marriage and parenting. You cannot effectively parent your children if your marriage is falling apart. Take it from me – I tried. There will also come a time when your kids will leave the house to pursue their dreams as adults. If you have not cultivated a lasting relationship with your spouse, you will have both empty nests and empty hearts.

Forgive. - No one is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. If you make forgiveness a habit – for everything from major mistakes to little annoyances (every day, I have to forgive my husband for leaving the wet towel on the bathroom counter ) – you will keep resentment from growing.

Over-communicate. - I used to have a bad habit of not speaking my feelings. I played the standard “You should know why I’m mad” game, and that’s just downright unfair. Men are not wired like women, and they DON’T always know that they’ve been insensitive. I’m still growing in this area, and there are often times when my husband has to pry something out of me, but I’m trying to remember that I need to just communicate how I feel.

Schedule a regular date night. - This one isn’t new, but it’s very important. Never stop dating your spouse. Even if you can’t afford dinner and a movie (which we seldom can), spending some regular one-on-one time with your spouse is essential. Don’t talk about bills, or schedules, or the kids. Frankie and I often daydream about our future, or plan our dream vacation. We connect emotionally and often learn something new about each other – even after four years.

Never say the “D Word”. - If you’re gonna say it, you better mean it. Plain and simple, threatening divorce is not fighting fair. I did this a lot in my previous marriages. I’m not proud of it, but I learned better. I was hurting deeply, and I wanted to hurt back, but it never helped me feel better.

Learn his love language. - Everyone has a love language. The way you perceive love is often different from the way your spouse perceives love. Does he like words of affirmation, or does he respond better when you give him gifts? Whatever his love language is – learn it and USE IT.

Never talk negatively about him. - I learned this lesson the hard way too. If you’re going through a difficult time in your marriage and you need advice, see a counselor. Family counseling is a great tool, but try to remember that your family members and friends are not the most objective people to give advice. The argument they are hearing is one-sided and they often build up negative feelings toward your spouse, which usually doesn’t subside once you and your husband have gotten past it. Protect his image with those that you’re close with and seek help from those that can actually be objective. News flash, ladies – your mother cannot be objective!

Choose to love. - There are times in a marriage that you may wake up and not feel in love anymore. Choose to love anyway. There are times when you may not be attracted to your husband anymore. Choose to love anyway. Marriage is a commitment. In sickness and health, in good times and in bad. Those vows are sacred. They don’t say “if you have bad times”. They say “in good times AND in bad”, implying that there WILL be bad times. It’s inevitable. So choose to love anyway. He’s worth it.

The emotional pain of a broken relationship is as hard to bear as physical pain, sometimes even worse. And, as with physical pain, healing must be sought. Jesus Christ can identify with our pain because He understands rejection first hand (John 1:11). Part of the warfare for healing a broken relationship is believing God can heal your emotions. When God is able to heal your emotions then thoughts of the broken relationship or how it broke don’t send you into a tailspin.

Some relationships can be healed and the two people can be reunited. Other relationships may not be rejoined, and in those cases you will need to seek healing from the broken relationship itself.
Whatever the case you find yourself in, carrying around emotional pain is similar to living with an untreated wound. It can lead to further infections as the bacteria of bitterness and regret is left to spread. On top of that, if you had an open wound filled with puss on your arm (yet under your shirt) and someone brushed up against you unaware of your wound, your reaction would probably be to jerk your arm, or to became angry and possibly say something unkind, or even to walk away in pain. This
reaction wouldn’t make sense to the friend
or stranger who simply brushed up against
you. It would seem like an over-reaction to
them. Any over-reaction is tied to an old
reaction that has not yet healed.
That is why it is critical to either heal your
broken relationship with someone, or heal
from a broken relationship. Otherwise, you
run the risk of harming future relationships
due to the wounds from the past.