@michelin: at what point did I state twas murder?

It's definitely a foolish and irresponsible thing to do. BUT then there are far worse things (I think some1 said that).
Its just unnecessary.
The gal puts herself at risk n all.
1 of the many benefits of being a male

Early stage or no early stage why is it such a big deal then. Don't get delusional. Its not murder but its wrong

@Michelin: Who's talking emotion. I'm a guy, I couldn't care less (really). Plus I've never been the cause of any gal having to go thru that procedure.
If science was all that mattered then why do you go to church/pray; thats assuming that you do.

@ soin: Thanks, I'm sure she did. Thats the point (nobody needs pity or anybody to feel sorry 4 em).

Just so you're clear when I say hurt I don't mean physical pain. . .

@ Michelin: Well I don't think this includes science alone does it. Its way beyond that

@ gentledove. . . I'm almost force to laugh. Spilling of sperm . Oh well. Thats your opinion but it def doesn't encourage me to zip up. Feel me?


@Soin: I'm actually not surprised at your post. When she doesn't need your pity. She's obviously a better person than she was prior to that time.

@michelin89: Don't get it twisted. A friend of mine confided in me: When she was about to get hers done. . . an ultrasound was done (I'm sure u know what that is). There and then she decided not to go thru with it. But then the considered her options and the consequences of her decision.
She then went a got it done. She cried for months (iMean Months). If not that she knew me and knew the kinda person I was she wouldn't have told me. It goes to show you the extent of how she felt she did wrong and how she hurt. Its all a matter of conscience tho. But then its not just a bunch of cells

Is there a definite line b/w being outspoken and a nagger. . . I feel its subjective.

Who's outsopken to me mght be a nagger to you.

I scanned thru all the posts and I don't see any thing about the doctor's who perform the "surgery". My sibling worked as an intern in a Hospital (a very good one at that) and he told me that no day passes that at least 10 girls don't come for registration or to perform the process.

Ok now I know that this thing cost at least 15k. That kind of money is not beans especially for the kind of people that come for this process. They are mainly students.

So If you want to accuse the girl of being a murderer what about the doctors, are they not accomplices; accomplices of probably over a 1000 people. Think of that.

Last week A couple were murdered in cold bold in front of their 6year old kid. And another 7month old baby. I'm almost sure that if those people turn to God for forgiveness, truthfully and sincerely they would be forgiven. I myself would want for them to have the most gruesome and painful death imaginable.

Its not what you think. This thread is not realistic. Maybe it sensitizes the one to the issue but not in the best of ways.

There's a parable in Bini that says you can grow big (or scattered) teeth as much as you want but ensure you have Big lips to cover them.

The Priest in my church says that if God decided that we all walk around with a daily sins written on a scroll and worn on us as a dress then his sure that 98% of us will remain indoors. What I'm trying to say is don't judge. Do you actually think that the gals doing this are happy to do it?. . . Before my post becomes to long lemme stop.

Like I said before Naggng Men are unsightly. . . Someone once told me. Men are meant to be seen not heard.
Actions are meant to speak when it comes to a man.
Definitely if a man is to be noisy he definitely must make sense and more importantly be funny as against being quiet. Not a nagger

Oh I still say that opposites attract, If you know the four major personalities: sanguin, Choleric, Melancholic & phlegmatic. You'll know that two of the same kind will never really stay long. I'm an intro. . . and usually prefer someone to drag me outta my shell (then I could act like you'd think I'm an extrovert). Overtly noisy people are a turn off but that is true for every thing (too much of somethiing is bad).
They definitely meet at the middle and like I said befor complement each other. What attracts you in others are qualities you wish you had.
Picture this:
two very quiet ppl = Graveyard,
Two noisy ppl = Earthquake.
Definitely people there has to be a bit of a difference and by my thots its equal and opposite
Then again there are other qualities that matter. Every1 is unique. I know I'm not attracted to quiet people, except the opportunity presents itself so as to say: u must communicate with this person.

Opposites attract. That I'm sure of. A nturally noisy person will be attracted to a reserved one. they usually compleent themselves
A nagger usually has a way of getting the more reserved person to speak some (not most/all) of whats on his/her mind.

Oh well.

Frankly I don't think the word is lucky. People tend to get what they deserve. You deserve to be happy and I'm sure he deserves you too.

Life always presents itself with opportunities. You took yours and you're enjoying the benefits

All hail iice (I previously was under a diff alias). Much respect

Threads/ Please start a truly innocent thread on romance and see what happens to it.

Romance def exist. (simply)

Hey Gabry just as we have men who can be likened to animals so also we have women. . . .
Its a good thing you met my kind.

I've notice tho that women seem to have gained a new orientation and as such some are power drunk. Good for them tho; just hope they don't cross my path. the matter go red for them.

Silence, Preferably in men. Nagging men are unsightly.
Silence in both partners = Disaster, so also Nagging in both
Communication is definitely essential one form or the other.

What event might've happened that prompted this post. Since I don't have anything nice to say. . .

Hmmm. . .

I seriously wonder when u guys will stop stereotyping people.
What makes u believe a guy can't be nice and exciting at the same time?
Personally I've been around many girls for example who are a world of fun yet principled to the hilt.
This definitely applies to some guys and I advise these are the ones the ladies shld go in search of.
Stop this doctrine of exclusivity.

I seriously disagree with you. Its almost like saying Fat people (esp gals) have a relatively lower self esteem. . . Not always true but mostly. THAT COUNTS
Case in Point: I have been considered the Mr Nice Guy and I didn't get a** nearly as much as I would've like and definitely not nearly as some guys I know (who fit the discription of the other kind).
Being nice usually is isn't cos they're ugly as some1 said its usually low self esteem and lack of knowing one's worth = Timid.

I've always being nice and still am, but I'm definitely not easy cos I know my worth

@Jenny, Why would I want any1 to waste time. I'm only stating an option that err1 seems to ignore. Its best to be thorough

@poster. You can choose to move on. You know the situation best cos u wearin the shoe n know where it pinches.
I only stated that so you'd probably see things from another view and make ur decision there on.
I'd personally tell you to move on though but that's entirely your choice. As for hints to move on. . . Be with friends and fam
Don't necessarily need to fornicate but it can help a gr8 deal but have female friends plenty. you'll come to see that it was and is her loss.

she might have used that as an excuse yes, but knowing some gals, I feel they're rather passionate about the smoking and non-smoking thing.

One things clear: you really love this girl. Getting a good thing isn't easy. Firstly you have to convince yourself (probly by seeking professional help) that you've quit totally. Secondly try and look at things from her point of view. If you were passionate about something and she was unrepentant, what would be your reaction? Your fear would probably be that even if she claims that whateva habit has ended, what stops her from going back to it.

Hardwork pays, she'll probobably see that you're genuine with time, if you decide to keep at it (try to keep a level head though cos she'll defntly test you). While you're at it though try (not going to be easy) to dislodge yourself from the whole issue by doing what you know best (Not smoking!!!). By doing this you'll have satisfied yourself that it wasn't meant to be and you'll probably come off a better person (experience is always the best teacher).

The whole new person thing might just be to check if you really care, OR NOT

Good luck though

I'll leave that to providence.

There's something called selective truthfulness (or something like that). Relationship is all based on trust.
Give him big pieces of info that'll make you gain his trust. you can choose to ignore telling him stuff later on

It seems to me that you've been open with him right from the get-go so a change will defntly raise a brow
Let him knoiw that you're finding it difficult to trust him and trust goes two-ways; just like taking his game to him

If you want to keep your secret thats a perfect way to do it. take the fight to him so it seems he started it.
After the saga you can delibrately forget the initail reason for the whole issue (your secret).

You'll prob win both ways.

As for men keepin secrets, well I'll comment on that later

Why not delete them to save yourself the emotional stress?

First of all its good for bizness. . . When they see what you've bin with then they feel I'm sorta doing 'em a favor by being with 'em. Works like a charm.
Secondly Its definitely not causing any emotional stress if anything she's grateful I didn't do that cos according to her its mature but she knows she's the past and has even requested I make a photoCD of it. I keep all my digipix anyways.

Never really had any to start with. . . She tore most of the pix (FIESTY!!) Used the rest to their logical ends
STill got the digital pix though, In my old PC (don't use that often now)

What does that mean? Does that mean you won't let another woman get close to you?

Why shouldn't she get close. The truth of the matter is she'll really never know as he'll probably be all nice and stuff but then emotionally, he's detached. Only those who had seen him in his previous relationship will know the difference. Relationships don't necessarily need to be built on love. Respect is also another big factor. If that relationship ends, he definitely'll miss the companionship but then he'll not beat himself about it. Sh** Happens will be the attitude.

this aint a topic for debate,men should just speak the truth.yes men do get heartbroken and don't get over it easily, when they fall in love.sometimes it take a longer time to heal sef, speaking as a man, the only thing is that unlike women,men a rarely heartbroken twice

I second, If you don't feel it then you weren't in love. It def takes longer to heal and I certainly support the part of it rarely happening twice.
Check, most playas once loved truly and deeply (not an excuse) but then the hearts been caged and you just don't have access to it no more.

One more stupidQ on Nairaland.
Which is more respnsible for u postin on Nairaland, your brain or your heart?

Let me get this straight, U've assumed that the heart is the reason for this post: How does that make it stupid
Or does the heart make one stupid?

@post: I'm assuming you're making frantic efforts to make urs works if that be the case I'll say this

Whatever makes you derail from your priorities is not worth it. If making ur relationship work doesn't affect you adversely then do so otherwise F*ck it.

Naturally everyone has their part to play must not be 50/50, but then each party involved should at least be confortable

I don't think this guys that prefer nagging know what is nagging, it is quite different from what you thought it is. If you say complain i might prefer it to silence but nagging, somebody you can never please, very aggressive etc, me I know dey ohhhhh

Nag, Complain same to me. . . Truth is people who nag are more easily manipulated

SCORPIOS? Oh Not much. . . Apart from we're the sexiest of all the stars. Leave a lasting impression on the eyes and If you ever get the pleasure of sharing the same bed ^{(Or whateva).} Can I get a witness

Thats breaking an unstated rule. . . Not nice at all