Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

I think a lot of people make a mistake thinking that being married means staying with your family 100% of the time. There are times you will be away from your family. This is one of such times. One thing is sure. Regardless of how you see it, you will still end up being with your family. A similar thing happened to a friend of mine. She was however able to work her way back to meet her family and in the process got promoted after a year.

I advise you let the woman follow her mind. Never kill another person's dream because of nothing.

A good wife can easily change when she earns more than the man. Try and persuade your wife to remain in Lagos. Please don't get a transfer of your good job to abuja because of your wife, if you transfer to abuja and the unexpected happens, you don't want to come back here to say you wished you had stayed in lagos. If your wife decides to go to abuja with the kids well let her go. A man's dignity in a relationship is a good job and God.

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

sorry for digressing sir, I've been jobless for over two years now, please can you help me whenever there's vacancy in you company?, or if you can help me talk to your madam on my behalf, it's not been easy with me, Please!

Tjra:

Thank you sir

I can NEVER resign. I only intend to seek a transfer to our Abuja branch. Branches are 'dead end' careerwise. Many would do almost anything to be in HQ.

Don't go to the branch sir. I worked in a bank and can tell you this for sure. The moment you go back there, the moment your career dies.

You need to be thinking out of the box. Let them go to Abuja. What gives you the impression you can't get a job with better pay in Abuja outside the banking sector?

So people dey see money like this for this country. Nawa oo

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

You can always visit. I don't understand this your phobia for height. You can die before your time even here in Lagos via road accident. The truth here is that as both of you yearn for career progression, you will not always be together with the kids.

Your children can still turn out fine if you monitor them from time to time using technology. Remember....to him much is given, much is expected. The more the resources, the more the demand, sacrifices and risk involved

If you were on her new job case for about a year, you would have thought out this challenge. If you trust your wife let her go and test the waters.

Take flight Biweekly jor.

Personal Experience
In the year 2007
After myself and then fiance... Later became my wife finished our NYSC in Ebonyi and Imo State respectively, My wife got a Job in Abuja some months after I started working with Oceanic Bank in Lagos,.... You know what? She rejected the offer, thinking that we shall continue to stay in Lagos. I persuaded her to accept it she she looked at me in her usual "Don't go there manner"

Guess what? 3 months later I was transferred to Abuja.

Moral
We tend to reject God's plan for our lives using our mortal logical thinking and reasoning. God's way is not our ways.

Conclusion

Let her take the appointment in Abuja. Thing will fall in place.

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

why allow her to process the job when you know the job will be situated in Abuja, simple avoidable circumstances..

Now I am very sure you can't talk her out of this because she's been working tirelessly for it for over a year...

Me I don't really gbado family people live away from each other, it's not worth it...

And also there is no advised to be given here you have 3 options,
1.work your transfer to abuja if your organization has branch there, or, see if she can work hers to Lagos.

2.she can start working, while visit once every month a or weekly for weekends with the family, you both can afford it
Or she can simply quit the job..

Hmm I hope she don't misbehaves now that she earns more than you do.. Goodluck

Help me bro.. I never chop today, my children too. Please Brother

Congratulations first.

There are sacrifices you have to consider and made for a greater goal. While I understand the need for you to be with the family, you can't stunt your wife growth and your own growth also need to be focused.

You can run flight bí weekly to Abuja. Alot of family are running this and they are fine. If you buy tickets earlier it will be around 100k a month which I think the financial you put it there can comfortably take care of and you can grow as well.

It is her turn now support her with all you need and be loyal to her. She will reciprocate when your time comes. You can imagine have to work abroad and she staying back in Nigeria in future.

Just hustle together now so your children can enjoy the best and you can both retire well which I guess it's 15 years time.

God speed.

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

Allow her to go. But firstly, take a month leave at your place of work, go there and visit her, on the visit, you can spend more time with her, monitor her routine, do your own findings about the new job, this will help you know how she's handling the family when you're not around, such a monthly pay will have great responsibilities. And she might not be able to handle it alone. This will further help you know if you should join her or not. If you guys decide to stay differently, visit her twice a month, then on your leave period. Then on her own leave period, she should come with the kids during their holiday to visit you..

What a lucky man and a lucky family.

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

It is good for a family to stay together to train their children but in the situation we find ourselves in Nigeria, even those who stays together work as if they are not living together and your is not the only one so, take to it
But plan ahead.
Don't live according to your status.
Plan , say ten years apart after which you would have put somethings in place so that your latter years will be spent together in peace.
Put up a house , a business plan or any other things that can make for the time apart when you settle down later together.
Make the time apart a time of planning.
Then visit your selves often and talk daily even if not more than five minutes everyday to keep your love so that out of sight will not be out of mind.
Understand each other and trust yourselves.
Don't give room for suspicion or third party.
Pray always and commits your efforts to God.
It is well

Tjra:

My wife is presently a contract staff. Relatively good pay but she can be asked to leave anytime.

This is the main reason she's taking up the job not just because of the pay.

Pls if you dont mind divulging this info am about to ask you, what career is your wife into ?

Naso una go dey reason big, fat lies
How can some be earning millions, yet can't cordinate his life, which brain u take dey earn such, but ur brain can't plan ur life well, am just tired of NAIJA

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

My brother, nothing comes easy. You need to make some sacrifices to get to a certain level in life. Pls see it as a sacrifice. Let her do the job for at least a year and plan for the next level- travelling out with the whole family. All the best!

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

My advice: both of you should plan setting up your own business and become self employed. This will enable you can stay together and enjoy your marriage.

If your wife agrees with you, you two can save enough money within a year to start a good business, then one of you will resign to manage the business while the other keeps the job

Your wife should not have to give up such an opportunity, especially after all the hard work she put in to get the position.
Such opportunities may never come again and she will always have regrets.

Ishilove:
This one is tough o

Nothing is tough here. This guy is acting like an over pampered pikin. He shd try hunger for a whole month. His brain would reset and start flying every weekend if need be. Once a month is still a good option. He shd not ruin himself with this ingrate attitude.

Decline the offer. You will thank me later. Don't let her go for that job. A good one will come that's convenient

Allow your wife and kids go abeg and also help them to settle down as fast as possible then visit them often till everything rallbin plqfe at the right them.,

Tjra:
Also, note that it will take a big deal of effort on my part to convince my current supervisors that I want to leave them for Abuja.

They actually would be heartbroken because they almost always recommend me for promotion over the other guys I met in the new department.

Makes me feel like I am about to betray them but the truth for me is Family first over job/career for me.

Abeg where Una take they see all these jobs.
Make Una helep Una fellow country man abeg

Abi na, he can also get a side chick to while away d boredom.. .. Nairaland with dere bad mouth, don't bash ooo

ojun50:
Allow her go
Visit them ones or twice in a month
Family first we all know but family with out job is like hell.

Laurenyn hill

Lose one gain one

daben1:
sorry for digressing sir, I've been jobless for over two years now, please can you help me whenever there's vacancy in you company? Please!

Wish I could help bro. I'm just an employee. My coy post entry level/experienced hire jobs online from time to time. Nothing like personal recommendation or referrals. At least not at my own level.

pls... kindly learn a skill while still working at the headquarters that can give u a monthly return of over 1million naira.... There are legit skills and investment that can do that trust me..... Then u can later decide to leave your job, be in total control of your time and join your family in Abuja

Tjra:
LONG STORY ALERT!!!


Good afternoon Nairaland.

God has been so good to my family this year and a particular blessing has been giving us sleepless night.

I work with a big organisation here in Lagos and currently earn about N600k. I used to work in the branch since my entry level days 6 years ago until I was able to runz the head office movement.

Ever since I join the HQ two years, my life has been at ease. No weekend duties, no sickening pressures from customers. I have been able to develop my self, complete the professional courses I abandoned and can rest well on weekends/public holidays.

The worklife balance now isn't only the advantage of working at the HQ. The career progression and rapid promotion crowns it all.

My spouse earns a little above N400k and we manage ourselves well. Our combined income isn't that much but we've been able to achieve a lot due to our mutual cooperation. She commits her resources 100% into our home. Some people see me as a "big man" outside, no knowing I am actually enjoying the reward of marrying a good wife.

My wife recently got a job very lucrative job. Salary is about N1.5M monthly. She was on the process for close to a year. You can imagine our joy when she was eventually given an offer. This job is a huge one for us as a family and will make life more sweet.

My pain now is the job is based at Abuja and that means she has to relocate there with our kids. Abuja is not where I can drive to considering the security situation of Nigeria. Also, it won't be wise to fly down every week (I also have hidden phobia for heights ) because of costs and other attendant risks.

I actually want us to live together as a family most especially because of our kids. Some Kids tend to be spoilt when raised almost alone their mothers. As a father, I want to jointly raise them with their mother and also instill discipline in them appropriately.

The only solution on sight is to ask my company for redeployment to a branch at Abuja. This I fear might return me back to "Egypt". I.e days of stunted growth, no promotions. In summary, I am scared of killing my career by myself.

My wife is okay with us visiting each other every month but I am vehemently against it.

Someone please help

My brother, you have your answer. N1.5m PER MONTH is nothing to sniff at.

1. If you force your wife to stay in Lagos and miss that opportunity, you risk her resenting you later.
2. If she goes to Abuja while you stay in Lagos, that isn't a marriage at all. Money should never be an excuse for spouses to stay apart. You will never gain back the years you missed, especially your children's milestones.
3. Take the move to Abuja with her, nothing says a man cannot make the sacrifice for his family - it doesn't diminish your role as head of your family. You have a good wife... I would not expect her being the primary provider to change that.

Pray, support your wife, move with her... you never know if God is asking you to move because he has something better for you as well.

@Tjra, congratulations to you and your family, my candid advice is, go by your wife suggestions, because I will not advise you to redeploy to Abuja, based on what you have said towards your work. Thanks.

Jaykizz:


Don't go to the branch sir. I worked in a bank and can tell you this for sure. The moment you go back there, the moment your career dies.

You need to be thinking out of the box. Let them go to Abuja. What gives you the impression you can't get a job with better pay in Abuja outside the banking sector?

Isn't it possible for him to get the 'better pay' job while working in the branch?