neonly:

That question is bottomless
When I was young I was a Catholic(alterboy)
Later Trem
Meet her join CAC
Later join foursquare dat where wahala starts
Out of anger I wanted to go to d church because me I don't go to church anymore personal reason
I wanted to ask d pastor what they preach but later I just let it go

Why ask an outsider when your wife is there for you to mine for the answers you seek.

Communication is key!

Do you know its your fault? That's the foundation you laid, by agreeing to do all the chores, you started this even before children came, she is used to it and won't change.
Better get a domestic help for the kids.
Women like taking advantage of nice guys.

Never a good idea to pamper a woman every time, she won't respect you.

Thank God you used the word helping your wife and also cos you have ample free time compared to your wife, you were not compelled to do it by your wife's nonchalant abdication of her duty. Your narrative is far different from the Op's story . If he was doing the house chore out of love he won't be complaining and considering divorce. We all love to make our home function effectively by going out of way to get things done but not when you are made to do them caused by negligence by a partner .

Kobojunkie:
Here's what a marriage like that looks like..

She just came back from work now 5pm not even a greet just straight to her room
Or should I just leave d house for now because am really emotionally hurt

ahnie:

I'm calming down Cassy.

Your words too direct, e dey cut both from front and back. Kinda abrasive.

Hope sha you're good?

Kobojunkie:
1. In marriage, there is no such as something your wife should do. Ask people who are honest and they will tell you the truth.

2. He hasn't said anything about whether she brings money or not for sure.

3. Submission in marriage is s choice not a given since we all do not subscribe to the same cultural or religious ideas

When you have been in a marriage for many years, you no longer meant to look for reasons, red flags, to help you end it, but instead for ways to help you grow, hopefully your marriage along with you.

He mentioned it, he said she is working but doesnt contribute to the house.

neonly:



Nope I do 99% on me

was she like that from the beginning or she just changed of recent? Believe me this questions are really important to take into consideration before u make your decision

Kestolove:
Divorce and marry another, responsible girls full area no husband

Responsible ladies full where?

cassyrooy:
Your words too direct, e dey cut both from front and back. Kinda abrasive.

Hope sha you're good?

Yeah am good Cassy!
Many thanks for the spot on.

hopexter:


So why are you still with such a useless and materialistic thing? Na mere Hungry girlfriend she be, Pursue her make you find a better geh. Good babes full everywhere bro

I have told her.. that I don't want her..!! She keep disturbing me that we most settle down together

ufotty2001:
I have a girlfriend all what she think of is how she will collect money from me and career.. !!! She has never ask me how is business? How is life?? How are you managing... All are calls are complain that she need this or that..

What are you still waiting for?
Give her Red card

Kobojunkie:
Why ask an outsider when your wife is there for you to mine for the answers you seek.

Communication is key!

Bro's I even told her d Bible say love yur husband has you love him
Just imagine she just got home now since 7am to 5,05pm not even a greet just straight to her room as it nothing is happing
Well Anger don dey build up now make I just waka go my friends place

sabreal:

The only thing I will say is this:

Make the children are in safe hands and you should also take good care of them and your selves.

Do not allow them to suffer too much of the impact of the separation.

Make sure you play your role in their lives.

It's not as easy as you suggested because things would not remain the same. Childcare will definitely suffer some setbacks as both parents would now be living separately and they're not expected to show the same level of performance as though they're together.

neonly:
She just came back from work now 5pm not even a greet just straight to her room
Or should I just leave d house for now because am really emotionally hurt

Locate any tavern go drink beer by the time you return you would be too drunk to notice anything.

But on a more serious note,I think someone mature that has seen it all in marriage and is still standing tall should counsel this guy.
I fear for his mental health.

neonly:
Am not good writer please trying to make it short

Everything just falling apart in my house
Sometimes I hear some folks saying I will tolerate rubbish in marriage but honestly it easier say than done if it actually happen to you
Where did I get it wrong sef
We use to be good friends before church matter enter
Now she does nothing in the house
I go to work come back to go to market and cook clean the house wash the children uniforms for the younger ones

All she is interested now is her own career
What my fate when I grow old
Is this not a red flag for me
What will be the fate of my wonderful innocent children how will they feel not growing up with their mother and father together all these are pounding in my head
the issues are too much I can't type it all am really depressed but sha life goes on
But my children what will be their fate

Go to school very quick. I just noticed a gap

neonly:
She just came back from work now 5pm not even a greet just straight to her room
Or should I just leave d house for now because am really emotionally hurt

Make you start to dey cry now, cry and go and beg her for forgiveness
What's he even saying sef radar ada

wonderr:
was she like that from the beginning or she just changed of recent? Believe me this questions are really important to take into consideration before u make your decision

She was not working before she gave birth to my first child
But down d lane she said she didn't want to be idle at home then........

neonly:


We are both ophan no parent but brothers and sisters but I can't send my children to go and stay at anybody place God forbid no when am alive they must stay with me

Lol , you're funny...why are you so clingy?

ufotty2001:

I have told her.. that I don't want her..!! She keep disturbing me that we most settle down together

She just dey use you keep up but if you like her and think she would change then go ahead and settle down with her, you should know hungry girls like that no deserve husband. Know what you want and deserve bro

neonly:
She just came back from work now 5pm not even a greet just straight to her room
Or should I just leave d house for now because am really emotionally hurt

Bros abi na Oga I go call you. Chill.

Sometimes the things we give bleeps about aren't what they are, and the things we handle with somewhat negligence are the biggest issue.

Some women are stubborn and the only way to get them into realigning with the family formation is to tame them through unconventional show of character.

Probably she's hardwired your oppression into her psyche and has elected to look beyond you for happiness. Where you offend her? People who rebel don't just wake up to, dem dey get reasons.

Drop ego, study her hard and see if you're dead to her before you proceed else you'd be getting a cold wall with her, and don't even use force, e no go work. Her spirit has taken a new phase, art of war no be only canon and ballistic missiles, be preemptive and less mechanical.

neonly:
Am not good writer please trying to make it short

Everything just falling apart in my house
Sometimes I hear some folks saying I will tolerate rubbish in marriage but honestly it easier say than done if it actually happen to you
Where did I get it wrong sef
We use to be good friends before church matter enter
Now she does nothing in the house
I go to work come back to go to market and cook clean the house wash the children uniforms for the younger ones

All she is interested now is her own career
What my fate when I grow old
Is this not a red flag for me
What will be the fate of my wonderful innocent children how will they feel not growing up with their mother and father together all these are pounding in my head
the issues are too much I can't type it all am really depressed but sha life goes on
But my children what will be their fate

If that's the only issue, it can be amended.. Get a house girl or boy..When she's at work,the person would be doing one or two things while you both are at work...
Apart from infidelity, I don't think you have a valid reason for a divorce here.. Or you want a house wife?....Your marriage lack proper communication..Two of you should plan together..
Oga,get a helper for her and have your peace..Shalom!!!!
She's your wife and deserve the Best in her career!!!
Period!!!!
If she's a house wife,you will still complain of having too many load on your back,head,and stomach... Nawa for men sef.....

neonly:



I accept all u just said it OK part of advice
Hope u read my post well for the past 10yrs she been working no support to house welfare
Marriage is part of helping each other flaws but when the other person see it in a different way and start capitalise on it then wahala go dey
Why won't I wash my children cloths and cook for my wife be a complain no u getting wrong
This no dey gree do anything again na work and church be her poragative u right no communication again I have tried honestly but all talks and gist fall on deaf ears
My 2nd son seems to understand what is really going on and am afraid our issues don't him at school he woke early today and said he didn't want to go to school ask him y he said nothing with a sad face
They are reason am still putting on d relationship to make it work but honestly now am just tired
It better to have a broken home and be alive to see yur children grow than to be death

Don't listen to that bitter 46 woman oo

MALIGNANTGuest:

I can sense Laxity on her part if you're truthful.
That's how most of them start looking unkempt and accumulating excuses.
IF you truly do all that you put up there, then she does no work at home.
The only relationship between a man and his WIFE is marriage and not BLOOD TIES.
Forget the LIES people perpetrate everywhere about Husbands being spiritually linked to their wives. What about SOLOMON who cleaved to 1000 women?
U can only share blood ties with your siblings.
Ur WIFE is still the visitor and that's the practical & undiluted truth.

His wife is a career lady and she chose d career to her home. I see how u didnt comprehend his post cos what's employment through marriage got to do with anything

poiZon:

He mentioned it, he said she is working but doesnt contribute to the house.

I just saw that too, and trying to understand what reasons she gave for this to OP.

ahnie:

Yeah am good Cassy!
Many thanks for the spot on.

Isoko Amaka.

neonly:
She just came back from work now 5pm not even a greet just straight to her room
Or should I just leave d house for now because am really emotionally hurt

You come across as needy.

Go out and have fun with your mates, they're waiting for you at the bar.

neonly:
Am not good writer please trying to make it short

Everything just falling apart in my house
Sometimes I hear some folks saying I will tolerate rubbish in marriage but honestly it easier say than done if it actually happen to you
Where did I get it wrong sef
We use to be good friends before church matter enter
Now she does nothing in the house
I go to work come back to go to market and cook clean the house wash the children uniforms for the younger ones

All she is interested now is her own career
What my fate when I grow old
Is this not a red flag for me
What will be the fate of my wonderful innocent children how will they feel not growing up with their mother and father together all these are pounding in my head
the issues are too much I can't type it all am really depressed but sha life goes on
But my children what will be their fate

They said u should get househelp

cassyrooy:
Isoko Amaka.

Hahahahahahahaha...not you again nau
Many thanks!
Are you on WhatsApp?

neonly:
She just came back from work now 5pm not even a greet just straight to her room
Or should I just leave d house for now because am really emotionally hurt

is she earning more than you?

..

flavnwokem:
Thank God you used the word helping your wife and also cos you have ample free time compared to your wife, you were not compelled to do it by your wife's nonchalant abdication of her duty. Your narrative is far different from the Op's story . If he was doing the house chore out of love he won't be complaining and considering divorce. We all love to make our home function effectively by going out of way to get things done but not when you are made to do them caused by negligence by a partner .

The house is yours and the children yours. So doing chores in your own house for your own family shouldn't be a burden but a part you play to build your own family.

neonly:
Am not good writer please trying to make it short

Everything just falling apart in my house
Sometimes I hear some folks saying I will tolerate rubbish in marriage but honestly it easier say than done if it actually happen to you
Where did I get it wrong sef
We use to be good friends before church matter enter
Now she does nothing in the house
I go to work come back to go to market and cook clean the house wash the children uniforms for the younger ones

All she is interested now is her own career
What my fate when I grow old
Is this not a red flag for me
What will be the fate of my wonderful innocent children how will they feel not growing up with their mother and father together all these are pounding in my head
the issues are too much I can't type it all am really depressed but sha life goes on
But my children what will be their fate

Which can talk be this?

Is this coming from a man or woman.

This is the definition of gbewu da ni husband.

Anyways just sit her down and talk to her rather than rant here. Discuss the possibility of getting a maid as that will help both of you.

Her career is important and your own well being also so get a maid and pay her good money to do the job.

E never reach to leave your marriage so remain there bro.

Cheers