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The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. - Romance (8) - Nairaland

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Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by engrelvis(m): 1:18pm On May 12, 2018
Renegadd:
You can be ,do or have anything you want ,no matter how big it is .Every dream can come true .
First write it out o a piece of paper and also think about the strategy to achieve the goal. Every problem has a solution, you just have to brainstorm the possible solutions and actions to take . most people may not achieve their dream because they're too lazy to write it down on a paper and brainstorm, strategy. how bad do you you want it ?
bro read my post well.i never said u can't b what u want to b but sometimes it deos nt work out d way u plan it.some divorcee in our society today never plan or expected it.always v a joker or plan B.is people dat achieve dat we celebrate n hear their story.what of d less unfortunate ones? am nt talking about lazy or unserious people here.i v met serious n focus people with high goals agenda .yet dey r nothing to write home about .u think Davido n wizkid r d most hard-working n talented Nigeria musicians ? I dnt think so . but dey r d most most popular n appreciated musicians here.v met talented n hardworking Nigerians both here n abroad n if nt for high exchange dollars rate dey r nothing to write home about.go to our streets n stadium n c talented n focus footballers who even dribble more dan okocha but where r dey now? Look at Madrid/jeventus match.in d last minute jeventus conceded a penalty.i luk at my classmates dat we graduated together in d mid nineties n I marvel.some we called lazy n unfocused ones r doing well today while d so called focus ones r struggling to eat.dnt get me wrong .hard work pays but some times u need an element of luck n divine collaboration.
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Newmanluckyman(m): 1:19pm On May 12, 2018
ideology:

You are speaking Grammar

Is buying house achievement lol?

Abeg live matter and enjoy your life...

If you find good woman and marry congrats ( which is the subject of discourse)

My point is clear I do not support op's conclusion that guys should just pick anyone and marry just because it gets more difficult as they grow other.

As you get older and you can't still find it, get busy with something else. Shikina !!!


This world will come to an end anytime from now...
...as per the bolded, are you having a comprehension problem? Didn't you read where the OP stated that one should do a careful due diligence (KYC) before taking a woman to the alter. Don't just criticize for nothing.
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Jman06(m): 1:22pm On May 12, 2018
[quote author=AmericanSons post=67496705][/quote] Bro, infidelity happens all over the world. Besides, there are still many good marriages around.

Btw, are you the Ben she was referring to??
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by AmericanSons: 1:42pm On May 12, 2018
Jman06:
Bro, infidelity happens all over the world. Besides, there are still many good marriages around.

Btw, are you the Ben she was referring to??
grin grin grin God forbid lol. i am no forking Ben. grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Acidosis(m): 1:55pm On May 12, 2018
AmericanSons:



lol, infidelity is a universal problem. You don't have to be married to experience the pains of infidelity. Merely seeing your crush kiss another man can leave you shattered for days.
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 2:01pm On May 12, 2018
.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by AmericanSons: 2:21pm On May 12, 2018
Acidosis:


lol, infidelity is a universal problem. You don't have to be married to experience the pains of infidelity. Merely seeing your crush kiss another man can leave you shattered for days.
bros, you fail to look at the underlying reason lol. grin grin grin grin
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by toscolee(m): 2:34pm On May 12, 2018
hmm.... so this is what I'm going through...ok
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Espada10: 2:34pm On May 12, 2018
pocohantas:


Na me get all this one?
Chai!
Yep grin

You are welcome by the way
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by ayusco85(m): 3:04pm On May 12, 2018
blakky97:
you are right. the best one i have met is a chronic introvert. there is nothing i have not done to get her used to me. she is too shy. i have analysed it properly and i don't see that aspect of her changing anytime soon. when i was younger, i flowed with the saying that with money a man can get a wife overnight. but the reality of it is, with money, a man will likely get a bad woman overnight

I was just like you too bro. I had to settle with the closest thing to a gud girl I was able to lay my hands on 5 yrs ago. I had to grow with her and teach her a lot. U can only catch dem early but once they are above 24 men they are another diff being shaped by their experiences weda gud or bad. Gud luck bro

1 Like

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 3:11pm On May 12, 2018
DonPikko:
check your pm
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by obongitiad(m): 3:25pm On May 12, 2018
Toks2008:


Nice question...

In the days of old,our parents don't date or court,they get introduced to each other and that is it...but strangely enough,their marriages usually lasts compared to today where couple date and court for years yet the case of divorce is on the increase. What was the secret?,....due diligence...

The parents of old dig deep to the history of the prospective couple...they find out many things and they will go ahead to introduce the couple to each other only if they are satisfied with their background check.

You can do due diligence on anyone today by checking their social media accounts,ask people who know that person be it friends co-workers,church/mosque members,even exes(sounds stupid I know)...but these are just few ways of doing due diligence if you really want to k ow that person beyond what he or she tells you.

Okay thanks a lot.
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 4:02pm On May 12, 2018
Mr toks be talking about due diligence and how the marriages of old lasted....Complete bullsh*t! Our mother's were forced, coerced and brainwashed to get into marriage, and they remained in the most times abusive, dehumanizing union because of fear and what the society believed...

1 Like

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Jeferious: 4:15pm On May 12, 2018
I dunno. I'm just different. And marriage might be a nice institution...but i don't give much f##k$ about it. And If you come from where I come from, you would understand me.

Even as an only son, I don't feel pressured. I'm more concerned with myself and my family. And till my family's name is as famous as Dangote's, Tinubu's or Innoson's....I'm not resting.

I just want to ensure that whoever would take any of my sisters' hands in marriage would feel like I did them a favour. I want to see that look of awe and joy on their faces when I tell them that they can tap from an illustrious bloodline.

As for me myself...if you can remember Michael Corleone's character in the 'Godfather'...that's exactly what I want to be like. I know I want to be respected, influential and feared. And if it is possible to be these three things without being married, then marriage is not an achievement for me.

1 Like

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 5:56pm On May 12, 2018
Pussickpunk:


Hehehehehe...Bro, I'm with you on this...Imagine, every where I turn to they are always talking about relationships, marriage and sex. I wonder if anyone in africa talks about technology, aliens and planets. We leave it to the white, while we have sex and populate the earth.

This is why I think that crappy "Wakandan" movie doesn't represent africans at all...E too pass wetin we fit do!
shut up
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Toks2008(m): 5:59pm On May 12, 2018
Pussickpunk:
Mr toks be talking about due diligence and how the marriages of old lasted....Complete bullsh*t! Our mother's were forced, coerced and brainwashed to get into marriage, and they remained in the most times abusive, dehumanizing union because of fear and what the society believed...

Lol! My mum and several other mums of my friends were never forced yet they enjoyed a lasting union...im sorry if that was the case of your folks but due diligence holds the key.

1 Like

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 7:46pm On May 12, 2018
Toks2008:


Lol! My mum and several other mums of my friends were never forced yet they enjoyed a lasting union...im sorry if that was the case of your folks but due diligence holds the key.

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 7:55pm On May 12, 2018
wakandan:
shut up

Seriously? What is not a moniker on nairaland sef?

Bia Nwokem, you yourself talk true, which of your countries has attained that level of sophistication!!! cheesycheesy
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by AlphaSoul: 10:49am On Mar 23, 2021
Toks2008:
In our early 20s we usually have all the time in the world to date and engage in romance with the opposite sex,we care less about their persona,background and intentions...often times we take for granted the very ones who sincerely desire us because at that point,commitment is the least of our worries.

Its also amazing to know that in most cases,we tend to fall in love deeply at that point in our lives when we never planned for it.

But as we grow older and we get into our 30s without any commited affair, we suddenly realize its no longer as easy as it was when we were far younger and we try to be very careful not to make mistakes and by so doing we make things even more difficult and complicated for ourselves....

Unfortunately at this stage,many subliminally develop gamophobia(fear of getting married) because there is no more time for long courtship and you don't want to marry who you don't really know,every person that looks attractive to us is a potential spouse...men see ladies at this stage as desperados. Most guys at this stage get confused and ladies at this stage become impatient and any affair running into a year or more makes them uncomfortable.

The pressure starts building from parents,friends,family members and even the social media dares not know you are single. Then we try to console ourselves with phrases such as.."Marriage is not a do or die thing,marriage is not for everyone" "it's better to remain single than rush into wrong marriage"....

The simple truth is that in most cases from a certain age, the more we advance in years,the more difficult it becomes to get married and the more careful we try to be,the more complicated it gets but only the singles at 30 upwards can understand this.

My advise to anyone in this situation is that once you see someone you feel any form of attraction to,drop your fears,do a quick due diligence on that person and if you are comfortable with your findings just take the risk and dare the consequence because no matter how long you wait and no matter how careful you may be,you can never be too sure of that person until you start living under the same roof as a couple and there is no good or bad choice of spouse but what we have is your choice and what you make out of it.

Don't know if this makes sense.
/
+1
/
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by wealthtrak: 10:53pm On Apr 17, 2021
Toks2008:
In our early 20s we usually have all the time in the world to date and engage in romance with the opposite sex,we care less about their persona,background and intentions...often times we take for granted the very ones who sincerely desire us because at that point,commitment is the least of our worries.

Its also amazing to know that in most cases,we tend to fall in love deeply at that point in our lives when we never planned for it.

But as we grow older and we get into our 30s without any commited affair, we suddenly realize its no longer as easy as it was when we were far younger and we try to be very careful not to make mistakes and by so doing we make things even more difficult and complicated for ourselves....

Unfortunately at this stage,many subliminally develop gamophobia(fear of getting married) because there is no more time for long courtship and you don't want to marry who you don't really know,every person that looks attractive to us is a potential spouse...men see ladies at this stage as desperados. Most guys at this stage get confused and ladies at this stage become impatient and any affair running into a year or more makes them uncomfortable.

The pressure starts building from parents,friends,family members and even the social media dares not know you are single. Then we try to console ourselves with phrases such as.."Marriage is not a do or die thing,marriage is not for everyone" "it's better to remain single than rush into wrong marriage"....

The simple truth is that in most cases from a certain age, the more we advance in years,the more difficult it becomes to get married and the more careful we try to be,the more complicated it gets but only the singles at 30 upwards can understand this.

My advise to anyone in this situation is that once you see someone you feel any form of attraction to,drop your fears,do a quick due diligence on that person and if you are comfortable with your findings just take the risk and dare the consequence because no matter how long you wait and no matter how careful you may be,you can never be too sure of that person until you start living under the same roof as a couple and there is no good or bad choice of spouse but what we have is your choice and what you make out of it.

Don't know if this makes sense.
Gamaphobia... LMAO!
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Youngpo413: 3:25pm On Oct 13, 2021
biacan:
Chief Noooo mba you're not getting any younger look for a nice lady and get married..... me that I'll be clocking 22 this year I'm already starting to get worried cheesy
How is work.....?




#SUGARDADDY
Are you married now?
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Youngpo413: 3:37pm On Oct 13, 2021
eghuan1:




Funny you brought this up. I was driving some days ago and some policemen stopped me somewhere and where asking how's madam. I didn't know how to answer the question. So one if them looks at me and says, e be like Oga never marry o. And his colleagues were like, which kind joke be that? Then one said to me, Oga Wetin you de wait for? I replied say I de find better person and he laughed for sometime.
He came to my side and said you no go go village go find one small girl give belle? Oga no look all these Lagos girls o. Na Wetin I do o.
When I left them, I set up a project, just like those pastors that saw thunder and thought God is speaking to them, "project one year". Get a better accommodation, arrange my life and set a trap, anyone who falls into the trap, drag her to mumsy.

Project to be delivered latest July next year.
how the project?
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 5:02pm On Oct 13, 2021
eghuan1:




Funny you brought this up. I was driving some days ago and some policemen stopped me somewhere and where asking how's madam. I didn't know how to answer the question. So one if them looks at me and says, e be like Oga never marry o. And his colleagues were like, which kind joke be that? Then one said to me, Oga Wetin you de wait for? I replied say I de find better person and he laughed for sometime.
He came to my side and said you no go go village go find one small girl give belle? Oga no look all these Lagos girls o. Na Wetin I do o.
When I left them, I set up a project, just like those pastors that saw thunder and thought God is speaking to them, "project one year". Get a better accommodation, arrange my life and set a trap, anyone who falls into the trap, drag her to mumsy.

Project to be delivered latest July next year.
How project naa
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by eghuan1(m): 5:21pm On Oct 13, 2021
LagosInter:

How project naa


thank you for asking o. I be done forget this topic o.

project was finalized on the 2nd of October this year. That is two Saturdays ago. but I comot Lagos to find her o
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by eghuan1(m): 5:21pm On Oct 13, 2021
Youngpo413:
how the project?


got married two weeks ago, though it took longer than expected, but I'm glad i took the time. thank you for asking
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Youngpo413: 5:24pm On Oct 13, 2021
eghuan1:


got married two weeks ago. thank you for asking
wow,congrats boss.

1 Like

Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by Nobody: 5:25pm On Oct 13, 2021
eghuan1:



thank you for asking o. I be done forget this topic o.

project was finalized on the 2nd of October this year. That is two Saturdays ago. but I comot Lagos to find her o

You intentionally left lagos cos of that?

Or it was by chance.

Could you elucidate on the journey, we fit learn or or two things abeg
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by eghuan1(m): 5:28pm On Oct 13, 2021
LagosInter:


You intentionally left lagos cos of that?

Or it was by chance.

Could you elucidate on the journey, we fit learn or or two things abeg


No o. I relocated from Lagos o. Lag wan finish my career. i use my hand carry my shoes and went back to were i came from o. got a job there and have made up my mind not to return to Lagos again for work.
Re: The Travails Of Mature Single Men And Women. by biacan(f): 2:29am On Oct 14, 2021
Youngpo413:
Are you married now?
No I'm single

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