pappilo:
I used to be married and suffered from the same issue.

We lived together for like 2 years before marriage and we had a fantastic sex life. Almost immediately after we got married, sex life stopped being great but it wasn't bad. After the first baby, it deteriorated a bit more. It was like going to work when we tried for a second baby i.e. wake me up from sleep to have sex with the sole purpose of conceiving having calculated her fertile days.

After 2nd baby, sex dried up. I tried to reason with her on a few occasions but all to no avail so I eventually looked outside and never looked back. I lost interest in her totally and the outcome was divorce.

I honestly think this refusal of sex thing has something to do with how comfortable a woman gets. When you get married, they know you are stuck with them and either consciously or subconsciously, start to withdraw their sexual services.

Now I have like 6 girls I am running concurrently (God forgive me) and the one that came closest to refusing me sex is the one I let live with me for a bit. The rest wey na come and go, dey gimme steady sungbàlaja. Even when dem dry, we go use lube. I quick wake up from my slumber pursue the one wey wan turn landlady for house.

Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. At my big age? Never Again will I let any woman run format on my head!

luminouz:

If you like no satisfy your husband. You will come here to cry ni.

Who has that nonsense time to dey beg woman for sex, person wey you pay her bride price? That mumu upstairs dey go wash toilet so his wife will give him some? He said he is even contented with it? Tufiakwa!!! Not in my lifetime.

Anytime we tell these dudes to sharpen up that women respect leaders and men with frame,they will say we ain't shiit but they come online with their marital woes and expect us to give them advice? Is that not madness? How can someone you have been fuqin for so long before marriage suddenly denies you cookie and you had to Goan wash toilet before she gave you some? And he is so proud to say it online? Another Baba dey talk say he uses his professional exams result to tickle his wife onto the mood for sex.

These men will not kee me.

AngelicBeing:
Hian, concubine to the house, wetin person no go read for nairaland.com

SuperStriker:
Good day everyone.
I don't want to cheat on my wife but she cannot cope with my demands for sex. She even told me to control myself and be more spiritual and I am wondering. If I am not controlling myself, I would have cheated on her long ago. I am a fine looking man with many opportunities to cheat. We only have sex when she's ready and wants it, anything outside that is excuse upon excuse. How can a woman I married be telling me to control myself?

bukatyne:


What solution does redpill have for him?

Towma:


So you turned your kids product of broken home because of sex?
Imagine if na woman write this rubbish the kind curse nairalanders for curse am.

Simran94:

You men need to also realize that sex can be painful for women especially when they are not in the mood.
You can't just walk up to your wife and say you want to have sex, she won't bulge, try and do your part by putting her in the mood.

Stress can also make women not feel in the mood to have sex, she has lots of things to do from taking care of the children, house chores and then her own work, try and be considerate.

And men need to try and control themselves sometimes, I read on FP one time that a guy said he always has sex with his girlfriend three times a week for 3 years when they were in the relationship, Sex is not food, you guys need to tone it down

Mummyfour:
And what book or constitution is it written that women must wash toilet, or that if a man does house chores, he has lost his manhood?
Abeg what works in one marraige mustn't work in another.
The most important thing is if the parties concerned are satisfied with their own arrangements.
Marraige requires a lot of patience, tolerance, agreement and compromise.
Abeg no be every thing be gra gra as it regards marraige.
There should be mutual respect of both parties feelings.
I don't care what makes it work. What concerns me is: let it work, and let all be genuinely happy.
Case close

Smithroll44:
Do you know I’m experiencing this same issue with my wife if you married a woman that do not like sex you have to endure. My marriage is 10 years old with 3 kids have been facing this kind of issue since we got married then I later have side chick to satisfy my sexual stuff

Mummyfour:
And what book or constitution is it written that women must wash toilet, or that if a man does house chores, he has lost his manhood?
Abeg what works in one marraige mustn't work in another.
The most important thing is if the parties concerned are satisfied with their own arrangements.
Marraige requires a lot of patience, tolerance, agreement and compromise.
Abeg no be every thing be gra gra as it regards marraige.
There should be mutual respect of both parties feelings.
I don't care what makes it work. What concerns me is: let it work, and let all be genuinely happy.
Case close

slimjohn2k5:


[s] You are wrong bro. You cannot just go and meet Ur wife to open leg because your penis stand. [/s]

You need to make her happy and put her in the mood . I was thinking like you till I found my way out and I am happy with it

after4:
So the day she want it what happens?
Will she make him happy and put him in the mood?
Well, I am not you and can't be you. Stay on your lane. Simp

SuperStriker:


That is what I don't want to do. I don't want to go to another woman but I am suffering...Sometimes I feel like I will tear my shirt and start running round the street when that pressure is too much

luminouz:

Thank you for asking.

It's really simple. Tell her to attend to your needs or you will find someone who can.

OP's case is that of 'see finish'. The wife felt since he already married her and he loves her, she can exercise some control over him by weaponising sex, especially since she knows he loves sex. Wasn't the same woman fuqin him as he wanted during courtship? So what changed? And don't gimme that BS about kids and house chores and the likes. Many market women and shop owners close by 10pm-11pm and still fuq their husbands like he wants it. A woman will only be giving you the 'i'm tired' excuse when she knows you won't do shiit about it.

If I can marry her and still do my duties in that house, why should she Welch on hers? I love sex and any girl with me knows that. She also knows that if she weaponises that shiit, and refuse to change, I will get another and drive her out. Sex is not my ultimate but when a partner tries to weaponise it on me, I decline and turn the tables. Didn't you read where that married man said he had to wash toilet before the wife gave him sex....WTF is that? Sex weaponisation.

SuperStriker:
Good day everyone.
I don't want to cheat on my wife but she cannot cope with my demands for sex. She even told me to control myself and be more spiritual and I am wondering. If I am not controlling myself, I would have cheated on her long ago. I am a fine looking man with many opportunities to cheat. We only have sex when she's ready and wants it, anything outside that is excuse upon excuse. How can a woman I married be telling me to control myself?

market01:
I will need you to answer these questions before solution.
1.Are u the one that disflowered her?
2. How do you pass your signal to your woman when u r in the mood?
4: Do your cum before you ejaculate?
5. Do you romance before the main course?
6. How long do last ?
Thank you

bukatyne:


What do you advise the poster you quoted do in the scenario he painted?

authority2006:


Trash. Wife should open if husband has the urge. And husband shouldn't turn the wife down if wife has the urge. That's how you prevent cheating and other problems associated sex starvation in the marriage.


By their writings, we shall know them. All these inexperienced boys here sef!!! Na wa





Lol

Towma:


So you turned your kids product of broken home because of sex?
Imagine if na woman write this rubbish the kind curse nairalanders for curse am.

gassbee:
are u sure ur ak47 is in order

slimjohn2k5:


You are wrong bro. You cannot just go and meet Ur wife to open leg because your penis stand.

You need to make her happy and put her in the mood. I was thinking like you till I found my way out and I am happy with it

bukatyne:


Thanks for the response.

The bold summaries your solution to the OP using the redpill template.

The problem is that if he is a Christian, that advise is void because he only has one legitimate means to meet his sexual need: his wife.

He also cannot divorce her because she is unwilling to meet his sexual needs.

This is where her parents & spiritual leaders come in if he is insistent he doesn't want to cheat on her.

Stories like these get to me: We are against adultery yet we want to sexually abuse our husbands and hold them to ransom.

Kobojunkie:
A woman married to you is still a human being and not a sex doll or slave. Once you get that into your head, you will be well on your way towards finding a resolution to your marital problem.

If you really don't want to cheat on your wife , then the options available to you are as follows
■ Find a channel through which you can expend the excess energy you carry around with you there self control and discipline aren't lessons only kids ought to learn. Adults benefit a great deal from having such lessons planted in them from childhood, and are still able to learn them. Take up exercise, Sports or a hobby that allows you focus on other things to take your mind off sex.

■ Work on improving the health of your marriage. You and wife can seek out professional marriage counseling to help you both figure out how to help each other in this problem

■ Also consider the aid or a sex therapist as a couple to help you get the best sexually out of each other.

gassbee:
are u sure ur ak47 is in order

bukatyne:
Very pathetic thread on both sides.

I will just drop this line: anyone not interested or willing to sexually satisfy their partner (male/female) should not bother about marriage. All forms of sexual abuse are wrong:
1. Withholding sex;
2. Exchanging sex for gifts/cash;
3. Causing intentional injury to a partner during sex (outside BDSM);
4. Not making an effort to satisfy your partner;
5. Performing/incorporating acts that is shameful to the other party
6. etc.

Sex (all types) is the thing that done outside marriage is an outright sin. Other activities done together might just be inappropriate or indecent.

@stress: If something is very important to you, you make time for it or re-arrange your schedule to fit it in.

Davash222:

A married man should send you a DM so you can help satisfy his sexual urge?

Ain't you ashamed of yourself, you this cheap Olosho?

SuperStriker:


That is what I don't want to do. I don't want to go to another woman but I am suffering...Sometimes I feel like I will tear my shirt and start running round the street when that pressure is too much