₦airaland Forum

aalangel:
He wrote the mourning part like page 3 or 4...what I typed was before I even saw the mourning part...I still maintain what I said...he has no reason not to go home. What the woman did wasn't intentional. You'll meet your match in insults. I'm not your match at all.

You are not even sympathetic ...Because if you are you won't say you stand by what you said.

Must everyone react the same you Will do? He should go home? Leaving the burning issue and tagging him typical Nigerian man and hissing was heartless of you.

If you insist you said that before knowing about the death of the mom and still stand on what you said.. then it's a pity and very unfortunate.

BarrElChapo:
You're definitely crazy in the head.. look for another reason from where sir ? At a shrine or church.. man stop thinking like a sissy

You're quite daft.

Theonlysonofher:
Unfortunately my sweet mother left us

So sad

May God grant her soul eternal life.
And grant you and your family the fortitude to bear the irreplaceable loss.

Some annoying talk there, it was not intentional, she didn't mean to harm mama, we also drink and get drunk even though we know it could harm us. My brother if a man choose to put his own life at risk, it's his own life he will bear the consequences, but for a man to put a fragile old person's life or another person's life at risk is a no no, it's unacceptable.

AkaraAndBread:
Since we are in the business of trading blames, then I blame the OP and his doctor for his Mum's death. Ignorance should no longer be an excuse in this information age. I will explain...

His mum (from the story) had a seizure, most likely a stroke which led to her death.

Seizures could be from other causes too (electrolyte imbalances, infections, brain tumors etc.) Only an autopsy could help in identifying the actual cause of the seizure post-mortem.

Health guidelines (JNC-VIII) advise that daily consumption of salt should be between 2 to 3 milligrams of sodium or 1 teaspoon of salt per day.

One teaspoon of Dangote iodized salt contains about 2 milligrams of sodium. Even if his wife used FOUR teaspoons of salt to cook the pot of food, it will be (4 x 2mg= 8mg total of sodium) of salt in THE ENTIRE POT of food.

So unless Mama (may her soul R. I. P) ate the ENTIRE POT, then I don't believe that her sodium levels hit the roof like OP is alluding to.

Seasoning like Maggi and Knorr have high sodium levels too (up to 25g equivalent of raw salt per cube) but these will equally be diluted in the entire serving. And Mama would only have eaten a portion of the whole serving.

In fact, I advise my patients to cut down more on seasoning (especially the ones like Ajinomoto) rather than raw salt.


If Mama was hypertensive and diabetic, she should have been on a diuretic to get rid of any excess sodium (*** I'm throwing a shade at the finger pointing doctor***)

Here is what I think happened; Mama had a heart attack which compromised blood supply to her brain (cerebral hypoxia). This now made her to have a seizure (most likely from a CVA).

Most Nigerian doctors with limited experience underestimate the frequency of coronary events in elderly diabetics; a patient population notorious for having several episodes of silent, sub-clinical coronary events (aka mild, silent heart attacks). These mild heart attacks are usually a warning sign of a major heart attack looming.

Now I ask;
1. Was Mama ever screened for coronary heart disease when she was alive?

2. Was she on anti-platelet therapy when she was alive?

3. Even when she was brought into the emergency room were protocols to screen for/counter acute coronary syndrome ever implemented?

If the answer to ANY of these 3 questions is "NO", then please the man's wife should be left alone (in fact if I were her brother I would advise her to divorce that idiot. What manner of man will come to Nairaland and start accusing his wife of such??)

Likewise, what doctor will tell a patient relative that "Cock and bull" story of excess salt being the cause of a seizure??

OP should have taken his Mum to a better hospital for specialist care.

And the doctor should invest his time and money in medical textbooks and current journals to improve patient care and reduce blaming others for his own shortcomings.

R.I.P. to the deceased, but doctor and OP should both learn from this experience to avoid future occurrences.

GBAM!

You know most Nigerians are too ignorant to understand this. You know they are too lazy to want the truth. They would rather blame others to absolve all personal responsibility. Also the doctor should be cautioned, but that one will not happen. I just pray his wife isn't harmed in all of this madness.

BRATISLAVA:
A sad story.

But what stopped your mother from saying that the food was salty? What stopped her? You've painted the picture that she cannot speak. Is she disabled? Your wife didn't deliberately set out to kill her. You're exaggerating for reasons best known to yourself. Talk to her and find out what truly happened. Unless you know it was the doctor who was giving her the food, since he knows everything that happened.

Let's hear the wife's side of the story.

Victim blaming, very unnecessary

All those giving excuse for the wife are stupid and foolish...

I worked in a highly sensitive industry in europe for 4 years before returning to Nigeria.

My job was at certain times, run these 3 steps process...

People of God when I was on shift .. nothing like laziness or forgetfulness... I even designed an alert trigger mechanism that was going to work 2hrs prior to the time of conducting the 3 steps process.

Assuming his wife was in such job and she made a mistake and things got out of hand she will be disciplined.

The point is things that are associated with life, you take it a step higher...

The wife ought to have placed big reminders everywhere on the importance of no salt in mamas food...

She ought to have placed such reminder on the fridge, door of her room, kitchen.... It's how you know a discplined and deligent person.

Now the worst has happened

NoToPile:
He said the doctor even said it was more than twice mama ate the salt, how he came to this conclusion is what some of us can't understand.

I doubt the person is actually a doctor

Theonlysonofher:
Unfortunately my sweet mother left us

My condolences on the loss of your mum. I strongly plead you heed the advise of medical professionals on this thread and not scatter your home. I can say with good certainty that your wife's meal had absolutely nothing to do with your mum's seizure or passing. As many have said, what the doctor told you does not make medical sense

Where are your sisters?

tradepunter:
All those giving excuse for the wife are stupid and foolish...

I worked in a highly sensitive industry in europe for 4 years before returning to Nigeria.

My job was at certain times, run these 3 steps process...

People of God when I was on shift .. nothing like laziness or forgetfulness... I even designed an alert trigger mechanism that was going to work 2hrs prior to the time of conducting the 3 steps process.

Assuming his wife was in such job and she made a mistake and things got out of hand she will be disciplined.

The point is things that are associated with life, you take it a step higher...

The wife ought to have placed big reminders everywhere on the importance of no salt in mamas food...

She ought to have placed such reminder on the fridge, door of her room, kitchen.... It's how you know a discplined and deligent person.

Now the worst has happened

All these "turanshi" for matter you have no details of?
I can with some degree of certainly say that the wife is innocent. Many professionals have come out to state that a few days of eating regular food with regular salt cannot kill her.
If the salt was that much, the mother would not have been able to eat the food, as she is said to have been on a special saltless diet for sometime.

It's just unfortunate that she had a heart attack at a time the house girl was away. Heart attack doesn't give notice before coming. Healthy sportsmen have been known to die of heart attack while still playing on the field not to talk of an aged hypertensive woman.

Danisbrosautos:
You are not even sympathetic ...Because if you are you won't say you stand by what you said.

Must everyone react the same you Will do? He should go home? Leaving the burning issue and tagging him typical Nigerian man and hissing was heartless of you.

If you insist you said that before knowing about the death of the mom and still stand on what you said.. then it's a pity and very unfortunate.

No he shouldn't go home. He should end his marriage. Sympathisers.

socialmediaman:
Victim blaming, very unnecessary

Actually not. Why didn't his mother speak? It's only a person who can't speak that will keep quiet and look on while they are being given what they know they can't stomach. What happened to calling her son aside and telling him?

Unless, of course, the OP is lying about that part, because it doesn't make any sense.

wirinet:
All these "turanshi" for matter you have no details of?
I can with some degree of certainly say that the wife is innocent. Many professionals have come out to state that a few days of eating regular food with regular salt cannot kill her.
If the salt was that much, the mother would not have been able to eat the food, as she is said to have been on a special saltless diet for sometime.

It's just unfortunate that the hard a heart attack at a time the house girl was away. Heart attack doesn't give notice before coming. Healthy sportsmen have been known to die of heart attack while still playing on the field not to talk of an aged hypertensive woman.

If it's a heart attack then the probability is doesn't favor the wife.

All the while the house help was around... Nothing happened, then when she went away BOOM!!!

The wife would have totally even avoided this issue by preparing the special meal for the mother.

Autopsy is the only way of proving the wife innocent.... Because if we were to go by the law, that route is what the law permits.

tradepunter:
If it's a heart attack then the probability is doesn't favor the wife.

All the while the house help was around... Nothing happened, then when she went away BOOM!!!

The wife would have totally even avoided this issue by preparing the special meal for the mother.

Autopsy is the only way of proving the wife innocent.... Because if we were to go by the law, that route is what the law permits.

Do you think that if the mother did not have an acquired taste for salt, she would be able to eat regular food with regular salt without complaining?

Besides the autopsy would not be able to determine if it is the salt that was taken a few days ago that caused the stroke. She was already hypertensive. What we should ask is whether poison was found in her system and about her drug regime.

wirinet:
Do you think that if the mother did not have an acquired taste for salt, she would be able to eat regular food with regular salt without complaining?

Besides the autopsy would not be able to determine if it is the salt that was taken a few days ago that caused the stroke. She was already hypertensive. What we should ask is where poison was found in her system and about her drug regime.

When it comes to investigation you look at probable cause... The situations revolving around it, the environment and probability...

If x will trigger y at certain threshold... Then it will be logical to ensure conditions that will drive x should be controlled.

As long the conditions is controlled subject will be fine and less vulnerable.

So this could be were the lapses set in or we could also include error in assement of the medical guys during emergency section.

The chart with every possible metrics and variables I constructed points to probable cause of error from one of the several parties involved.

aalangel:
No he shouldn't go home. He should end his marriage. Sympathisers.

This is the only thing you picked out from what I typed. God help you. Amen.

Yinkakolawole:
Whatever a man sow he will reap, just leave her in the hands of GOD.

Yes. No one gets away with anything

sapoyoro:
if someone negligent act almost kill your mum
will you forgive such person easily?
would the wife be so negligent if the other woman in question is her own mum?
some of you people are just really stvpidd shaa

Some people are careless. She doesn't know the consequences till what just happened. ( I am not here to cry about sshit that can happen in life). I have lived long to see a son come back from abroad teased her diabetese mother( He knows her situation and have been paying maids to take care of her) to eat some cookies he brought back and that led to coma and death.
Shouldn't we also call the Son a murderer and a wicked person and whine around it?
The wife just like any person assume since the mother knows about the salty food and still goes ahead and eat it, she might be recovering or had it going well.

Majority of the diabetete I know long to eat food with salty taste. They will blindly eat it not minding the consequence.

anungangampu:
Some people are careless. She doesn't know the consequences till what just happened. ( I am not here to cry about sshit that can happen in life). I have lived long to see a son came back abroad teased her diabetese mother( He know the her situation and have been paying maids to take care of) to eat some cookies he brought back and that led to a coma and death.
Shouldn't we also call the Son a murderer and a wicked person?
The wife just like any person assume since the mother knows about the salt food and still goes ahead and eat, she might be recovering or had it going well.

Majority of the diabetete I know long to eat food with salty taste. They will blindly eat it not minding the consequence.

pure rubbish top down...read your earlier post and juxtapose with it whether it made sense to you.
you said the man is trying to run away from his wife and family.. like if he is not a human being with emotions and passions.
rubbish.

sapoyoro:
pure rubbish top down...read your earlier post and juxtapose with it whether it made sense to you.
you said the man is trying to run away from his wife and family.. like if he is not a human being with emotions and passions.
rubbish.

He is overreacting like a baby.. The mother is alive and the wife apologized, Why the other drama the man is instigating?

anungangampu:
He is overreacting like a baby.. The mother is alive and the wife apologized, Why the other drama the man he is instigating?

the mother later died.
whatever way he is feeling is normal.

sapoyoro:
the mother later died.
whatever way he is feeling is normal.

Well, the issue of divorce is where I think he is overreacting.

anungangampu:
Well, the issue of divorce is where I think he is overreacting.

talking with is a waste of time if you don't take in to perspective of the fact that respective of each peculiar situation human beings are naturally emotional due to the passion of the particular moments.
if someone negligent act contribute to your mother's death,I'm sure,you trying to act self righteous here will not have taken it easy with the person.
if you're a woman,I honestly pity your (future) husband

CAPSLOCKED:

COURTESY OF YOUR LOVING, CARING, WONDERFUL WIFE.
CONGRATULATIONS!

...
your matter can harrrrddd..

adieora:
Oga... your problem is ignorance.
I am a doctor and I can tell you that salt did nothing to your mother. It may slightly increase her blood pressure but that is about it.
Your mother is unwell. You have to accept that she will sometimes be even more unwell than she presently is.
If you like, destroy your home. Don't let ignorance destroy you.
Do you know how much salt will be required to make someone unwell? If your wife put in the amount of salt that would have made you mum unwell, your mum would not have been able to to eat that food.

..
and it's a coincidence that mama condition deteriorated barely a week after the wife took charge of mamas meal

AkaraAndBread:
My good friend, sorry to burst your bubble but the person you seem to be mocking is actually correct (ironic isn't it)

High sodium levels can lead to fluid retention and also raise blood pressure but any doctor that reads this story will know that this story is pure hogwash.

[/b]So our good doctor that attended to Mama now alluded cause of death to hypernatremia abi[b]? And the hypernatremia was caused by consuming excess salt in a meal that was eaten by other people (really??)

And the good doctor could confidently say this to the relatives of the deceased without an autopsy report ( see as some stupid doctors dey scatter family).

Medical practice in Nigeria is indeed amazing.

where in the Op was the bolded stated?

salt can cause increase in blood pressure,and fluid retention.
fluid retention can further cause increase in blood pressure.
ans the symptoms described points to hypertensive encephalopathy.

Theres a strong connection.

and is it a coincidence that mana condition deteriorated barely a week after the wife took charge of mama meal?

kazyhm:
Ordinarily female/women are equipped with this annoying lackadaisical and nonchalant attitude toward people.

The annoying thing is their indifference toward the ripple effect of their action(s). They just want you to forgive and move ahead with them.

If I tell you what my sister did the time I had an accident, broke my leg and went through two surgeries......it was heartbreaking. But guess what, I'm still taking care of her.

I have accepted the reality that she is so flawly created (she is in existence but not reliable)

Just forgive her, always supervise her and stop taking her flaws to heart, either done deliberate or absentminded. That what it take to lead.

The problem with modern men is assuming women is as uptight, intelligent, brave, wise and strong as him.......forgetting that the onus to make things work lies with men. Failure of men reflects on women and children.

Failure of men reflects on women and children

The bolded from your statement may be catchy to the eyes but I find it ambiguous and wrong at the same time as it tends to lay the blame squarely on men when things goes awry! It like saying the consequences arising from the bad decisions of women are the results of the failures of men! HABA MANA!!

Theonlysonofher:
Unfortunately my sweet mother left us

This is so unfortunate. Take heart Op. My sincere condolences

Unclesamo:
His mum is now dead.

So sorry RIP to her