₦airaland Forum

Mercychen:
Mr Man, sorry o but you're being rided by that woman and she's not a good wife.

On no condition should she deny you sex except she's sick.

Her body is all yours and you have the right to have her anytime you feel like. She has no right to keep her body from your for so long.

Fine, you assaulted her ( which was a fault of hers) and you've apologized. She should forget and move on. Couples quarrel and yours won't be the first. So whybis she making a mountain out of a molehill?

It's either she's seeing someone else or tired of the marriage. I mean, why would she starve you of your conjugal rights for so long in the first place and still go on to deny you of it when you asked for it?

You better shine your eyes. I have a feeling shes getting it from someone else and now you look repulsive to see her.

You guys should dead this talk.Her body is her own first before it belongs to anybody.

A wife/husband has every right to deny their spouse sex, there is something like free will and their consent should always be gotten because they are married doesn't mean there should not be boundaries on bodily autonomy and individuality

You should have raped her without beating her

Exactly

Ladyhippolyta88:
It is comments like his and many others on naira land that makes me worry for women in Nigeria.

I will reiterate again there is no where it is a crime to refuse sex it is your body and choice to decide, what is a crime is to force someone to have sex with you without consent.

cococandy:
There’s no telling how many women these ones on here have raped. It’s a shame

Some women here also reason like them too.

Imagine thinking that because you are married you no longer have a right to your body. The person teaching them this is the genesis of all this issue.

Noah9:
Good morning nairalanders. Pls I'll go straight to point.

My wife and I have been married for 3 years, God has blessed our matrimony with a beautiful daughter. My wife is so decent, caring and beautiful inside out. I have been a great husband and father to my pretty daughter. I have never cheated on my wife since we got married.

Recently, she barely give me sex. Infact it would take a whole month before I could see Just the color of her undies and I wasn't happy about it.

Last week Wednesday, I committed an unspeakable abuse, I'm so ashamed of myself. I Raped my wife and I hate myself since that incident.

Honestly, I don't know what came over me that particular day, I tried to make advances towards her, she refused and she pushed my hand away. Out of anger I slapped her on her face (she bled from her mouth), I overpowered her and forcefully had my way through. She cried all through that night.

I regretted my actions, I feel remorse, I hate my Life . I have begged her seriously to forgive me but she haven't said a word to me for over 5 days now. She cook for just herself and my daughter, she no longer sleep in our matrimonial bed, she would rather sleep in my daughter's room or the visitor's room, she no longer greets me anymore.

I have never abused, beat or raised my hands on my wife or any woman before. Last week was my first time I did such an abominable act in my Life . What If any one notice we're having issues now, how will I explain to them what actually happened?

I don't even want my little daughter to know we're having issues. I don't know who to talk to. It's a faceless forum that's why I'm sharing my pain here . Pls how do I restore back happiness in my home, I need my wife to forgive me. I'm truly sorry from the depth of my heart and I promise it will never happen again.

Please Help Me.

Minus times minus is plus.

cococandy:
And that’s fine. She’s allowed to not be in the mood.
That shouldn’t turn him into a rapist if he wasn’t one to begin with

He had no justification to rape her....

But what do u women always mean by I’m not in the mood...it just sounds like a way of manipulation.... two people that loves each other can get in the mood when they touch other....: one person need not be selfish by saying I will only have sex when I become h0rny naturally.....

Amarisco:
Not sure why you’re mentioning me with this bullshit. But seeing as you have, here’s what I have to say:

You don’t use cutlass to kill fly.

Whether the wife stupid o abi she no stupid o, the bottom line is pretty simple. Rape and domestic violence is never permissible. You don’t ‘call out’ victims.

Focus on the point, all this character analysis/assassination is irrelevant.

OP wasn’t talked down. He was not only asked to seek help so that he doesn’t lose self-control and commit another crime in blind rage, but also to support the healing of his home.

I mentioned u cos u lot are spewing a lot of crap and bullshit bt not analyzing the “whole” situation correctly. The husband is being manipulated because he is weak emotionally. Who deprives the husband sex for months without reason??

Toxay:
Bros well-done, I have heard of cases like this but I have not had the opportunity to speak to any of them.
Please can you elaborate on the incident i.e what caused, how you felt,temptations,what you did to resolve the matter and how things are now.
If you don't mind

My wife lost her urge and sense of sex after child birth, so anytime i ask her for s*x, all she says is that am not in the mood, as a man i love my wife, and i don't really want to hurt her, so i try to understand her..... but what i always do to surpress her is by letting her understand that i can use the medium of her denying me of s*x to go and satisfy my urge outside, then she won't have a choice than to reconcile and rethink. But sometimes she does not rethink nor reconcile, so then all i have to do is wait until she is in the mood.......... and sometimes i entice her severally to make her come in mood

ibechris:
Both of are u wrong and you messed up the whole situation but in fact,u didn't marry a good wife but a pretender if I may say.

Submissiveness is the hall mark of a descent woman.

There is simply no submissiveness in that woman. How do u justify her hoarding sex in marriage, in a weddedhome?. Her action could have made u to commit adultery which is still possible if the situation doesn't change.

Both of you need to talk extensively and if it worths involving her family,u had better do it fast before it goes out of hand.

Wishing u the best as u put situation under control.

May God bless you and your wisdom , I can see many people blaming the husband alone , without addressing what really caused the issue. I think the woman is already tired of the marriage , or what’s the meaning of starving your legally married husband sex and she no Dey even dress up in front of her husband again. Many immature people running to wedding anyhow

mixta140:
They both were never right ... call a spade a spade... she started it first... both are wrong

I don't think you are quoting the right person. Because I cannot see where I said one person was right with their actions.

descarado:
Wonder if seun pay these people for these stories.

Or the mods use diff usernames to chun out shaming threads.

And we will rush to comment as long as its the gender we hate.

Mtcheew

Who asked you, oversabi?

Christinaog:
Men are scum

Ori baba e ti gbale

This is the problem, SEX IS OVERRATED. Yes sex is great but hey you still got to take it small so you can enjoy it to the fullest.

anonym0us:
are you normal?
Which jail?

Bro you are the one that's not normal,rape is a serious crime if she press charges it won't end well for him...forget they are married but once it's a rape case he should better get a good lawyer that's if she takes this to court

I don’t know who managed to convince you that you have no right over your own body. But that’s not true.
You’re an autonomous human before you are anyone’s wife.

We can talk about how married people need to resolve their sexual differences and incompatibilities all day long. But before what conversation, we need to establish one fact which is that the woman is a human being with rights to her own body.

Your comment is an example of why I do what I do on NL. They keep regurgitating their misogynistic BS day in day out and young girls like you unwittingly imbibe such harmful messages without realizing what a disservice it is doing.

You’re a person and you have rights over yourself. You’re not property

Mercychen:
Mr Man, sorry o but you're being rided by that woman and she's not a good wife.

On no condition should she deny you sex except she's sick.

Her body is all yours and you have the right to have her anytime you feel like. She has no right to keep her body from your for so long.

Fine, you assaulted her ( which was a fault of hers) and you've apologized. She should forget and move on. Couples quarrel and yours won't be the first. So whybis she making a mountain out of a molehill?

It's either she's seeing someone else or tired of the marriage. I mean, why would she starve you of your conjugal rights for so long in the first place and still go on to deny you of it when you asked for it?

You better shine your eyes. I have a feeling shes getting it from someone else and now you look repulsive to see her.

ayindejimmy:
.


Not when we both own the biro.

This is marriage not dating. Two has become one.
Refusal of sex by any of the partners is negligence of conjugal duty.
Some men when they're sex starved they portray develop animalistic instincts. Me, I just leave you and move to plan B.

I'm not defending the man's violent reaction but don't come here and say the wife is not wrong. She boxed the husband into a tight corner and he reacted differently.
They're both victims

We both do not own the biro though.

You have not answered how many women who are sex starved have resorted to raping their husbands.

They are not both victims, and once again, if violence is what you resort to to get your way, then, there is a severe problem with your upbringing and you need a psychiatrist.

If someone is not doing what they are supposed to do in a marriage, there are people you meet, places you can go to. People go to their family to talk to their spouses, some go to their pastors. You can even go to court.

But violence? The day they rape some of you, you will stop talking so flippantly about something as heinous as rape.

nrexzy:
Na him wife oo no b babe oo...
Abeg
D kingdom of God sufferth violence...... Etc

Lemme ask why on earth would his wife starve him. Of sex for over a long period with no reason?

E make sense to u

Same thing comes to mind, why on earth will a married wife starve her husband with sex.

For me oo I knows how to handle these kind of issues with my wife no 3rd party's involved we settle things in few weeks

Stop begging. You werent the only one that did wrong. However, if you keep begging, you will begin to look like the only villian.

If, your wife was a naive type before marriage, she may not understand her duties, Yes, duties because its part of the job descriptions for marriage. I was a sheltered girl and struggled with this in my early days, that itd fraud to deny your partner irrespective of how you feel.

You both need a counsellor, to help you realize who did what wrong and the importance of doing right.
am of the opinion that ex whores make the best wives for the sexually expressive men of today. No need bothering to be a good girl, just be badt and pretend to be good. That way, you can control them.

Noah9:
Good morning nairalanders. Pls I'll go straight to point.

My wife and I have been married for 3 years, God has blessed our matrimony with a beautiful daughter. My wife is so decent, caring and beautiful inside out. I have been a great husband and father to my pretty daughter. I have never cheated on my wife since we got married.

Recently, she barely give me sex. Infact it would take a whole month before I could see Just the color of her undies and I wasn't happy about it.

Last week Wednesday, I committed an unspeakable abuse, I'm so ashamed of myself. I Raped my wife and I hate myself since that incident.

Honestly, I don't know what came over me that particular day, I tried to make advances towards her, she refused and she pushed my hand away. Out of anger I slapped her on her face (she bled from her mouth), I overpowered her and forcefully had my way through. She cried all through that night.

I regretted my actions, I feel remorse, I hate my Life . I have begged her seriously to forgive me but she haven't said a word to me for over 5 days now. She cook for just herself and my daughter, she no longer sleep in our matrimonial bed, she would rather sleep in my daughter's room or the visitor's room, she no longer greets me anymore.

I have never abused, beat or raised my hands on my wife or any woman before. Last week was my first time I did such an abominable act in my Life . What If any one notice we're having issues now, how will I explain to them what actually happened?

I don't even want my little daughter to know we're having issues. I don't know who to talk to. It's a faceless forum that's why I'm sharing my pain here . Pls how do I restore back happiness in my home, I need my wife to forgive me. I'm truly sorry from the depth of my heart and I promise it will never happen again.

Please Help Me.

Noah9:
Good morning nairalanders. Pls I'll go straight to point.

My wife and I have been married for 3 years, God has blessed our matrimony with a beautiful daughter. My wife is so decent, caring and beautiful inside out. I have been a great husband and father to my pretty daughter. I have never cheated on my wife since we got married.

Recently, she barely give me sex. Infact it would take a whole month before I could see Just the color of her undies and I wasn't happy about it.

Last week Wednesday, I committed an unspeakable abuse, I'm so ashamed of myself. I Raped my wife and I hate myself since that incident.

Honestly, I don't know what came over me that particular day, I tried to make advances towards her, she refused and she pushed my hand away. Out of anger I slapped her on her face (she bled from her mouth), I overpowered her and forcefully had my way through. She cried all through that night.

I regretted my actions, I feel remorse, I hate my Life . I have begged her seriously to forgive me but she haven't said a word to me for over 5 days now. She cook for just herself and my daughter, she no longer sleep in our matrimonial bed, she would rather sleep in my daughter's room or the visitor's room, she no longer greets me anymore.

I have never abused, beat or raised my hands on my wife or any woman before. Last week was my first time I did such an abominable act in my Life . What If any one notice we're having issues now, how will I explain to them what actually happened?

I don't even want my little daughter to know we're having issues. I don't know who to talk to. It's a faceless forum that's why I'm sharing my pain here . Pls how do I restore back happiness in my home, I need my wife to forgive me. I'm truly sorry from the depth of my heart and I promise it will never happen again.

Please Help Me.

Chai... this is soo... unAlpha male. Guy you messed up. Beg oo... keep begging and coming up with strategies until she forgives you. Chai...so you can't just manipulate your way to fu.vk the woman you call ur wife? The best you deemed fit is by beating her up and forcing your way through? Guy u Bleep up. Beg oo continue begging, buy gifts, whatever means you think is necessary. Just keep begging. Chai...

cococandy:
What a xtupid post

U are the stupid one here....u cant make use of ur brain to understand logic ....stop throwing emotions...I repeat there is nothing like rape in marriage ... as long as u are married and fit, u owe ur partner sex... u hv no right to deny ur partner sex ,its a sin...

Its no different from a job that pays u to work...u hv no right to miss work unless u are permitted... its like saying a job is forced labour .... who breeds this generation of people like u??

advanceDNA:
He had no justification to rape her....

But what do u women always mean by I’m not in the mood...it just sounds like a way of manipulation.... two people that loves each other can get in the mood when they touch other....: one person need not be selfish by saying I will only have sex when I become h0rny naturally.....

Why she denied him sex is a separate conversation.
The focus here is that he’s a rapist.

Did he rape all his girlfriends who refused to sleep with him before marriage? I mean since y’all are so enraged by the fact that a man went a month without sex. I’m assuming you think it’s biologically impossible for him to abstain and try to get to the root of the problem in his marriage.

You’re a dumb child

Kingcalls:
U are the stupid one here....u cant make use of ur brain to understand logic ....stop throwing emotions...I repeat there is nothing like rape in marriage ... as long as u are married and fit, u owe ur partner sex... u hv no right to deny ur partner sex ,its a sin...

Its no different from a job that pays u to work...u hv no right to miss work unless u are permitted... its like saying a job is forced labour .... who breeds this generation of people like u??

But why should any normal woman deny her husband sex to the extent of making him sex starved and then become violent? If the husband should go out, wahala.. yet she expects him to be dying in silence.

This generation of women are making marriage look like prison to men.

@OP maybe you should consider taking a second wife.. but you did wrong, truth be told.

Say NO to rape!!

Waffarianman:
Same thing comes to mind, why on earth will a married wife starve her husband with sex.

For me oo I knows how to handle these kind of issues with my wife no 3rd party's involved we settle things in few weeks

Just try reason with am if she no gree...

Jeje leave house for her go somwhere dey....

It’s sad to see when women get convinced that they have no worth unless they are serving men in some form or the other.
That’s goal of the insidious patriarchy

Ladyhippolyta88:
Some women here also reason like them too.

Imagine thinking that because you are married you no longer have a right to your body. The person teaching them this is the genesis of all this issue.

Graxie:
How can a healthy woman deny her husband sex for one month? Very bad, you hate sex yet you marry. Ndi uchu.

Oga, it is possible that you irritate her, your smell, eating habits, laughter or your sex style. It's possible she is yet to experience orgasms from you perhaps, she experiences pain.

Meanwhile, you have been a rapist, this is not your first time. She must be wondering how many women you might have raped before.
For you to go ahead despite her bleeding mouth, cry, tears to rape her and ejaculate means you are a pro.

She will forgive you with time.

So exactly how is he supposed to figure out what has been irritating her, if she didn't speak about it?

cococandy:
Your wife needs to divorce you. Unfortunately she’s not here to read the advice. It would be thoroughly disgusting being married to a rapist. Excuse me while I puke

He ought to have divorced her first. Stop being foolish

princeemmma:
My wife lost her urge and sense of sex after child birth, so anytime i ask her for s*x, all she says is that am not in the mood, as a man i love my wife, and i don't really want to hurt her, so i try to understand her..... but what i always do to surpress her is by letting her understand that i can use the medium of her denying me of s*x to go and satisfy my urge outside, then she won't have a choice than to reconcile and rethink. But sometimes she does not rethink nor reconcile, so then all i have to do is wait until she is in the mood.......... and sometimes i entice her severally to make her come in mood

Ok I understand the loss of urge after child birth and that is a completely justifiable reason, some women even have post partum depression and the likes of it but if it continues months or years after childbirth then it's a completely different thing

blaquebelle:
God please save that poor woman from this man. This is how chronic abusers start. Tueh.

Why would you force yourself on anybody, talk more of someone you claim you love. How can you even enjoy it when your partner is feeling disgusted. She bled and you still forced her like that. You're an animal.

Now you're buying her gifts. What stopped you from buying her a gift before or trying to convince, cajol and tease her into having sex. Instead of you to investigate what her problem with frequent sex is or how to find her buttons you assaulted and molested her. You should be in jail please.

I pray for the day Nigeria would start working properly so that you'll be in jail by now instead of coming online to rant and say rubbish. Atleast that way there won't be a next time.

Mtchewwww

God save us from foolish women who would deny their husbands sex and not speak about what caused it. Ode

Luckysbab:
He ought to have divorced her first. Stop being foolish

yes that’s better than him being a rapist

PlentyMonikers:
heard she's married.
how I wish I can just reach out to her husband and show him the evil comments of his so called wife

Honestly. Such silly being

Ladyhippolyta88:
Some women here also reason like them too.

Imagine thinking that because you are married you no longer have a right to your body. The person teaching them this is the genesis of all this issue.

Of course you always have a right to your body and the man action has no justification whatsoever.

Also,sex is a responsibility to your partner as a result of marriage. Key word is responsibility which means you don't always have to want to do it before you oblige .