₦airaland Forum

@ The Poster,
I hardly comment here but you indeed need help. This is what I think is happening;
Personally I don't believe in premarital sexual contact, but while you guys were dating, were you both religious or along the line you both became religious after having sexual intimacy?
If sexual contact was involved back then, have you both changed the rules of styles because of your new religious believes after your marriage?
If your answer is yes to these, then you need to resuscitate his former sexual fantasies in you otherwise you may lose him to any random woman. You thought both of you had left your former way, he obviously hasn't and cannot ask for that from you because of your new believe. Funny enough, your religious leader can't even help you because if you report him, you will not tell your religious leader that, that was what attracted him to you in the first place. I note where you mentioned Prostitute's suggestion of anal sex to him, he might have initiated that discussion. If that was part of your intimacy before, you might want to bring it back.
If your answer is no, he might have developed some levels of addiction to porn movies over time. He needs your help, now is not the time to leave him. The fact that he apologises, means he is remorseful. Have a heart to heart discussion with him, let him know that you're ready for any style of his choice. Most porn actors do use enhancers, porn movies is always about fantasies. If he needs to consult psychotherapist, there is no harm in that. All in all you will play critical roles in all these.

my sister, this is normal …majority of men are having this porn addiction. don't be surprise that his brother his own case is worst than your husband

Nice piece �

kafeii123:

1. Immediately I arrived his place, I noticed he flirt alot onlline, Sex chats, Video sex chats, Visit porn sites, visit Prostitue Sites, and the rest.

these have been his coping mechanisms against the job stress and sexual frustartions before you came to join him....

2. I caught him red-handed twice and he begged and pleaded not to do such again. I forgive him and I believe maybe because of the distance we had in two years:

if he has been into it for two years...you shouldnt expect him to be off it in two months...

3. We move on and I promise myself not to even go near his Laptop or mobile phone anymore:

This might have helped...but what you actually need is to be in his face like so everyday..directly or indirectly....send him on errands... ask him for help with things.....basically.....get him busy enough to always remember you and begin to wean him off the two-year mandatory bachelorhood he's had before your arrival...

4. I adhered to that for more than a year, which I'm still doing that till December 23 of 2021: May not change anything....

5. My daughter threw his I-watch inside water. Then I picked it up to drain for some minutes, after I drianed, I realised a message popped up , which Read " Do you enjoy me yesterday Do I book you for tomorrow again" ...... leave this persons alone...your whole matter is entirely with your husband....

6. I was forced to check what's this. I saw hell. In short, he visited two different Prostitues in a hotel to book 30 minutes session with them for $160 and $220, I also saw other messages asking for Anal sex from these Escorts. I realised, he visited them 3rd, 1st 22nd of December. During these period, I was the one begging him for sex. He said he's not interested that he's Fixed with many activities and Shifts at work:

see.....I told you this man is stressed/has grown a wider appetite..... he needs outlets for that frustration....can't discuss them with you.....needs raw animalistic f*cking but you're mummy's girl.... you married him for his nice-and cool-ness.....he can't ask you for anal sex...cant ask you for Mouth Gig....can't ask u to just show up randomly near at the nearest hotel to his workplace and send him snapshot of you in lingerie...or wearing the sexiest outfit he's seen you in in years...and holding a goblet of wine .....you're too responsible for that afterall.....How do you praise God with this mouth with which you've swallowed d*rk......?

Plus .....you're now a moommy...you're mostly about the kids now....cant grab/spank him playfully and subtlely....


7. I was in the house hopping my husband as gone to work, not knowing he's doing something else within his short break and free time..... :

That's the very time to target.....let him be for a while....act like all s well..feed him well if you still can....begin to give him ashawo vibes... for God's sake flirt with ur man.....he'll at first ignore it....treat him to a glass of wine after work....ensure you take some too..... then drop down...relax onto your femininity and really have the maddest of seks with your husband..... following this... schedule random midweek showups at/near his workplace..... call d man up... tell him you're in the area and will like to just see him before returning to your way.... have him show up at d hotel....come to your room....take a glass of wine.. ferk him...(make sure to collect the money you paid for hotel room from him... maybe by the weekend help him get a small wristwatch from it/them) the next time...park a few metres to his place.. just before breaktime ....call ur man up/call any friends u know he has there..that you're outside and have to see him ....give him lunch....roll up the car doors...join him in the backseat...and take him.... the more erotic moments he shares with you..the less he time he has to follow escorts....

what a man eats is the only portion he has gotten in his life's labours..... the kids...family spendings..rents...etc..those are foryou...he mostly just needs food for his belly...and food/endorphins for his brain....how he gets that will determine his approach...some people just sleep ....some drink....but for many men...sex releases the most amounts of stress relief...by sex ..I mean ferk/bangs...and not love making ..... he will so begin to glow when you guys return to your former selves....


8. Immediately I saw this, I was devastated,I was mad at my self. We are very religious. Why all these for God sake, this is the 3rd time, what have I done to myself, have made a wrong choice?:

When survival is no longer a man's problem...something must keep him pumped.....its not you or him.....its his need and yours...but for some reason..he thinks you'd judge how he wants to be served.... you know him to be religious... you're the very one who should let that religion stay outside ....and for the public... while you feed his animal in private...cos whether you like it or not.... he's got one


9. I called his brother back in Nigeria and I inform and sent all what I saw to him, he called and talked to him, the next day, my husband came to me, apologize and promised not to do that again. I accept and forgive him:

Wrong move.... this will only make him want to hide it further from you.....its better to joke about it with him.... tell him to begin paying you ashawo levy every week....which you'd use to get one nice thing...for yourself and/or him......he is hiding from your judgement ..is why he went to pay a hooker for the type of sex he likes....he doesn't depend on you financially.... shame is a wrong tactic to apply....

10. Few days ago, I have been having this kind of feeling, I feel like I'm not beautiful because why will my husband prefer a Prostitue than me:

you see now? how's a prostitute different from you?.....cos you're educated?...run a company..... are accomplished..... to him.. you're both women..... and the dopamine/endorphin/oxytocin/whatever pleasure hormone is released during sex loads he gets from her is more than from yours.... that's your real sexual value right there... not that you are not beautiful...he's just gotten used to getting fed from those sources...you now have to also love-vendor up a bit.... and entice his brain to start seeking the satisfaction from you....

11. I hate myself, I think about it every minutes, whenever I see him, my mind keep breathing fast. I'm sad and I'm not happy, I don't know what to do....: this is not needed...you only need to brave up...and employ psychology with him....

12. I can't discuss with my parents, because they see my husband as the most religious person. you do this....you'd likely lose him forever if you're not careful...i'd advise you let your folks be...

13. He doesn't talk much, keep friends nor drink. : I can promise you that 1. he now does...he just doesn't do them with you.... and/or 2. that's the very reason where his urge for real/non-religious/"ungodly" sex is much more intense..... he wont be sated with the vanilla missionary sex you have been feeding him since...he now has a larger appetite...u have to expand your kitchen...beef up the menu you serve him...before blaming him for not eating....

in summary: I'm not used to doing this....but I hope with the above few pints of mine...I have been able to convince and not confuse you...that Sex is as important to a man as food...but that like cocaine/other pain medications...you have to increase the dosage as the user gets familiar with the substance in use.


No pun is intended..I do hope you're able to become more social...and find a way to infuse life into you guys' relationships.... men are babies...you have to feed his ego..if you want him to feed your tratra (replace the -ra-s with -o-)..that he even owes your mom and you for his traveling is a dampener for his ego.... your femininity is the only way to maintain keep his insecurity at bay...

Do pardon me if this doesn't resonate with you...just speaking from small experience

ShenTeh:
Auntie, you are still asking if this is a red light. No, it is black light.

Now seriously, like most victims, there's a tendency to blame yourself instead of the 'criminal'. Please don't blame yourself. The one who needs help here is your husband.
Stop making him see you as an easy forgiver. He knows you are very weak and are entirely financially dependent on him. Trust me when push gets to shove, his people would believe whatever he says against what you do. Save yourself.

He is an irresponsible man who has no business in marriage. If indeed you are in Canada, file for divorce with the evidence you have.

Hypocrisy sucks.

Edit. For those quoting me with bitterness and angst, I have nothing against you. I do hope you hold the same views if it were the husband that came to the www to complain that his religious wife has been seeing gigolos in a country he and his father sponsored her to.

l will quote u wt the strength l av,u av no joy n u are an agent of the devil sent to destroy homes.

Ur type are divorcee seeking marriages to devour.ops pls dnt listen to whoever this person is...

Ops u might b the problem n may nt,av a heart to heart talk wt ur hubby,its nt enough to just forgive him,ask him whatever he desire in those prostitutes, Mouth Action,diff styles of sex,sexy wears,anal sex etc n gv it to him....dnt judge him that cos u feel he us religious he may nt like this,u cn see he has weird taste for sex,look for a way to complement him on that.

If after this he still do not change,pray for him n convince Jim to go for marriage counseling. Your marriage will wrk,its just one of many challenges of marriages.

Yours is not different

ChiomaCa:
I'm honest with my story. And I have never for once deny him of sexual intimacy. Infact, most time I make move, almost all the time. I swear to God Almighty. I'm feeling as if I'm ugly and not good looking enough

if u make move all the time then u r nt being attracted to him.
Walk on ursef,atimes most women dnt dress to their hubby taste to look attractive yet if the man speak out on his preference of sex styles n dressing he expect from u,he might b judge for it

pocohantas:
Sex denial would not lead a responsible man into the laps of PROSTITUTES!!! It doesn’t make a man start engaging in ANAL SEX. There is nothing you men would not say to justify your bad behaviour. That is why Nigerian men do not get better, they just sit around with nasty attitudes and convince themselves they deserve the most virtuous woman.

Even some single guys do not do prostitutes. Do you know how twisted one would be to walk up to an obvious call girl and negotiate price? You think that is a habit a man would develop just because his wife denied him sex?

The lady clearly stated that she joined him in Canada and noticed that was his way of life. Yet you still have to twist it and heap the blame on her. This is his lifestyle.

You people would not die if you tell yourselves the truth. Ahnahn!!

it can...you are not a man so you can't speak for a man as much u want to sound good

Many ppl are really ignorant here especially post from a lot of ladies l av read who can't gv good advice other than divorce... Pls op anyone talking about divorce is not u helping at all..

Op ask yourself this honest question,how many man u want to divorce in ur life? Yeah ...cos if u divorce this one another one will do sumtin u dnt like.
There is no perfect man out there,if a man is not womanizing,he is into drugs or into beers or smoking or other things.
Marriage as it is comes wt its own challenges.

The man marry u cos he isn't perfect,part of his imperfections is this,womanizing.whether he started bfr u know him or after marriage isn't important now since u av already established his weakness.

You are his wife and there to help him to change with prayer,patience,love n dressing well,giving him good sex n diff styles and everytin u cn,not to DIVORCE. That is the true meaning of a WIFE

leave all those single mothers,divorcee,those desiring to be married but havent gotten hubby advising u to divorce to their own folly cos they definitely dont know wat marriage is all abt.
U pass thru the ups n down together.

You imagine this,God forbid wat if u r the one with an habitual habit that ubr finding it difficult to change,will av prefer ur hubby divorce u or stay true wt u till you find a way to change.marriage is nt for staying wen things are good and to japa wen its nt n the challenges of marriage wont tell u which angle it will cone from,it might evn come frm wat u detest most..

That is why they do say marriage makes one mature n responsible, reason why those elders respect those who are married than those not cos they know they av higher responsibility they are sorting than the singles...
This same advice is what l will to anyone facing any marital challenges,be it man or woman.
The spouse u stay wt today cn be a better person tomorrow, he won't forget those who actually stay wt him.he may want to change too but struggling cos it has already turn to addiction but no condition is permanent.
As a way of caution for u u may insist on condom for sex till u r convince he has change to protect ursef.
Be wise!

God forbid o. This is the kind of lifestyle I cannot endure. I don’t have advice you want to hear. All the best, hope you come out of this without any disease before your eyes clear. Christian brother my azz.

ratiken:
No matter what you do, do not consider divorce yet if at all ..... if he is not being physical with you. Try to save your family. What you are currently facing pales to insignificance compared to what single mom's and their kids face here in canada.

I have seen kids growing without their fathers becoming societal wrecks
I have seen single moms being passed around for sex by married and single men without any commitments
Single black women hardly get attention here much more single mums. I have seen single mums hustle for male attention in same city where their divorced husbands have remarried.

They encourage you to divorce but abandon you after divorce. Has anybody bothered to check the fate of these divorced women 2 or 3 yrs after?

Feel free to research the fate of Nigerian single mums from calgary, Edmonton, Toronto, Vancouver, BC etc ...... bitter lifes with lots of regret

Do everything to save your family.

This is another voice of reason in my opinion..I think the best bet after such separation is for her to return to Nigeria where she can of course resume the overseeing of her company being managed by her brother...if that wont create another session of bad blood on its own....

ratiken:
No matter what you do, do not consider divorce yet if at all ..... if he is not being physical with you. Try to save your family. What you are currently facing pales to insignificance compared to what single mom's and their kids face here in canada.

I have seen kids growing without their fathers becoming societal wrecks
I have seen single moms being passed around for sex by married and single men without any commitments
Single black women hardly get attention here much more single mums. I have seen single mums hustle for male attention in same city where their divorced husbands have remarried.
. bitter lifes with lots of regret

Do everything to save your family.

Women just dont have it easy in this world...

seems the only time when not marrying pays off for nigerian women is if they're from very wealthy homes....and even then...

pocohantas:
This is not about capacity to deal with sexual urges, this is about a HABIT. Some men are promiscuous but they will never do PROSTITUTES. Call a spade a spade!

Why will I patronise prostitutes , as in PUBLIC Toilets?
Na waa oh

Raalsalghul:
Both genders are the same everywhere but it seems only men are the ones that have accepted this fact. Women are yet to.

Probably because men are less emotional

KillIgbohoN0W:
So how did you both attract each other?

Though you're not an animal, I mean, though you're not a goat, but you actually reason like one.

Laurene:
mumu .
What's the difference.

lolz, a side chick is an exclusive property of the boss not a public dump site where all drunkards with wards of cash can freely go to offload their hot fluid

Raalsalghul:
I don't know why it's easy for men to accept Hypergamy but hard for women to accept Polygamy.

Honestly, there is nothing to accommodate.

Both genders have to accept their natures and L's at the same time and move on.

It is what it is!

While a lady refuses to date a guy because he's not financially at her level, she should also accept the fact that the well to do one she's eyeing, probably dating and hoping for something serious has other prettier and curvy ladies vying for his attention.

The competition too excites her in a way: it is called pre selection.

Even some ladies know this hence the phrase "better to cry in a jeep than a face me I face you".

My only grouse with the husband is that he's not discreet enough about his rendezvous.

Love you man.

I've never seen a woman as forgiving and tolerant like this op. Your understanding amazes me. I believe you genuinely love him and you believe he will change. Things like this are settled in the spirit. Your husband is not acting with his senses. This is not about you not becoming attractive to him any longer. He's under a strong demonic influence and until he's delivered, this addiction will continue even if you divorce him.

Every addiction is a demonic oppression.

First of all, distance is not a good thing in a relationship.
Second,I understand your husband is a person who has sexual fantasy judging by his preference for anal sex. Tell him you can give it to him. And do so if you love your marriage. God is not opposed to it if you are do it with your spouse.
He will never cheat on you again

ChiomaCa:
Hello everyone, I'm in need of an advice, I got married to a man 5yrs+ ago. He relocated some months after marriage to Canada, I went to meet him 2 years after. And we had a baby 10months after my arrival. Immediately I arrived his place, I noticed he flirt alot onlline, Sex chats, Video sex chats, Visit porn sites, visit Prostitue Sites, and the rest. I caught him red-handed twice and he begged and pleaded not to do such again. I forgive him and I believe maybe because of the distance we had in two years.

We move on and I promise myself not to even go near his Laptop or mobile phone anymore.

I adhered to that for more than a year, which I'm still doing that till December 23 of 2021.

My daughter threw his I-watch inside water. Then I picked it up to drain for some minutes, after I drianed, I realised a message popped up , which Read " Do you enjoy me yesterday Do I book you for tomorrow again"

I was forced to check what's this. I saw hell. In short, he visited two different Prostitues in a hotel to book 30 minutes session with them for $160 and $220, I also saw other messages asking for Anal sex from these Escorts. I realised, he visited them 3rd, 1st 22nd of December. During these period, I was the one begging him for sex. He said he's not interested that he's Fixed with many activities and Shifts at work.

I was in the house hopping my husband as gone to work, not knowing he's doing something else within his short break and free time.

Immediately I saw this, I was devastated,I was mad at my self. We are very religious. Why all these for God sake, this is the 3rd time, what have I done to myself, have made a wrong choice?

I called his brother back in Nigeria and I inform and sent all what I saw to him, he called and talked to him, the next day, my husband came to me, apologize and promised not to do that again. I accept and forgive him.

Few days ago, I have been having this kind of feeling, I feel like I'm not beutiful because why will my husband prefer a Prostitue than me.

I hate myself, I think about it every minutes, whenever I see him, my mind keep breathing fast. I'm sad and I'm not happy, I don't know what to do.

I can't discuss with my parents, because they see my husband as the most religious person.

He doesn't talk much, keep friends nor drink.

I need advice dear mummy and daddy please is this a red light?

Pray for him .
Ask him to go on fasting.
Create a family session where you guys pray ,meditate the word of god together .
Practice waiting on the lord together.

But most of all "call his name and command the spirit of immorality to depart from him in Jesus name ."

This last one is very important.
Ordinary advice will not do
He needs deliverance ,and you are the closest person that can help him.

You have authority in the name of Jesus Christ to cast out demons .

Your husband is held bound by a demon
No amount of advice or counseling will do
He would only get worse ,and might even fight you or threaten to divorce you ,stop speaking to you.

All these are not his own direct attitude but demonic influence which you have to help him deal with by ,commanding every demonic forces treating his sanity to leave in in Jesus name .

You can do this even in his absent.

It not until someone is present before you can cast out demons from them .

Just pray deeply for long .
Then declare what you want and sealed it with the name of Jesus .

Help him to give himself to prayer ,fasting ,the word of God,and waiting on God ,after his deliverance or he might go back again and get worse than before .

Read thus scripture below .

1 Corinthians 7:1-5
[1]Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.
[2]Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.
[3]Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.
[4]The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
[5]Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Vyolet:
Omo, I've been following all advice here but damn, this is the sickest.

Madam should get contacts of prostitutes her husband bangs and pay them to teach her about him?
EB things oo

Oga, be a realistic problem solver rather than a moral judge.

The guy has no chemistry for her for some reason
Its either they rebuild the chemistry or they divorce each other, a binary situation. The makeup breakup cycle is obviously only going to lead to frustration and anger on her own part, nothing further for the guy to loose except, so why not see if changing her own sexual behaviour can tip the scales.

The knowledge lies with those prostitutes and she has their contact. If its extreme things that she is not comfortable with, at least she will know, abort the process and proceed with divorce. For all she knows now, the man might even be gay, a BDSM freak, Etc. Bottom line she does not know, and the prostitutes will tell her for a price.

nawa ooo!!!

Gkemz:
I've never seen a woman as forgiving and tolerant like this op. Your understanding amazes me. I believe you genuinely love him and you believe he will change. Things like this are settled in the spirit. Your husband is not acting with his senses. This is not about you not becoming attractive to him any longer. He's under a strong demonic influence and until he's delivered, this addiction will continue even if you divorce him.

Every addiction is a demonic oppression.

You spoke in wisdom ,
But many will not agree with you because they are carnal .

The man is under a demonic influence .
Even himself might not be happy with what he is doing but he can't help himself .

He needs deliverance .
But folks don't want to hear that demon poses people

Mariangeles:
Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaha

Oko wu di, wukwanu local government nwoke.
It's the markings and pronunciation that differentiates them. (Although, I didn't add the markings)

Ihe m dere nga ahu wu awon oko asewo, ihe o putara wu ndi di ndi akwuna.

Hahahaha oooh...yes one movie I watched nkem owo married from tribes..

Nke yoruba ji akpo ya Okor mi.. ya wunu my husband.

Just like iyawo mi is my wife okwaya?

A ghota ga m yoruba ntakiri ntakiri o

Ezigbo ndi di ndi akwuna..

Ufodu nwaanyi ji ahu nsogbu and flags, yet daba n'ime ya...Nwoke nor mba ofesi after oluchara gi, common sense kwesiri iju ajuju si how is he coping when he gets hor.ny as a married man..

Again, nwoke noro ya juo gi oji nwaanyi eme gini..smh just mara na owu patron ndi Ashawo ma o wu ndi ihe nwoke ibe ha na amasi.

Same goes with some ladies that feels men are shit, ndi nke ahu ejila Love Machine meruo onwe ha ahu.. or the indulge in same sex stuffs.

Law of nature created vacuum for attraction with opposite sex...And if their exists a vacuum, nature must fill up.

ChiomaCa:
Hello everyone, I'm in need of an advice, I got married to a man 5yrs+ ago. He relocated some months after marriage to Canada, I went to meet him 2 years after. And we had a baby 10months after my arrival. Immediately I arrived his place, I noticed he flirt alot onlline, Sex chats, Video sex chats, Visit porn sites, visit Prostitue Sites, and the rest. I caught him red-handed twice and he begged and pleaded not to do such again. I forgive him and I believe maybe because of the distance we had in two years.

We move on and I promise myself not to even go near his Laptop or mobile phone anymore.

I adhered to that for more than a year, which I'm still doing that till December 23 of 2021.

My daughter threw his I-watch inside water. Then I picked it up to drain for some minutes, after I drianed, I realised a message popped up , which Read " Do you enjoy me yesterday Do I book you for tomorrow again"

I was forced to check what's this. I saw hell. In short, he visited two different Prostitues in a hotel to book 30 minutes session with them for $160 and $220, I also saw other messages asking for Anal sex from these Escorts. I realised, he visited them 3rd, 1st 22nd of December. During these period, I was the one begging him for sex. He said he's not interested that he's Fixed with many activities and Shifts at work.

I was in the house hopping my husband as gone to work, not knowing he's doing something else within his short break and free time.

Immediately I saw this, I was devastated,I was mad at my self. We are very religious. Why all these for God sake, this is the 3rd time, what have I done to myself, have made a wrong choice?

I called his brother back in Nigeria and I inform and sent all what I saw to him, he called and talked to him, the next day, my husband came to me, apologize and promised not to do that again. I accept and forgive him.

Few days ago, I have been having this kind of feeling, I feel like I'm not beutiful because why will my husband prefer a Prostitue than me.

I hate myself, I think about it every minutes, whenever I see him, my mind keep breathing fast. I'm sad and I'm not happy, I don't know what to do.

I can't discuss with my parents, because they see my husband as the most religious person.

He doesn't talk much, keep friends nor drink.

I need advice dear mummy and daddy please is this a red light?

Good you haven't shared this with any other family member because if you do, his apologies might just transform into embarrassment and anger.

A partner's addiction to prostitutes can be a real problem; but never let it make you believe that it is because you are inadequate or not beautiful. Rather, this addiction comes because of a partner's desire to have different women because of their different 'flavours'.

I know someone who was like this but later changed. So pray for your husband, talk to him about it, and be patient with him. Don't let it be what will split your family.

You can go a step further by paying more attention to your physical looks. Enrol in a gym; exercise; and avoid unnecessary fat. Remember that he was honourable enough to bring you to Canada even when he could continue to have his prostitutes without any 'disturbance'.

You no dey give ur man bj and ur man like it

Sucolee:
You no dey give ur man bj and ur man like it

Hehehehehe inside life.

pocohantas:
Sex denial would not lead a responsible man into the laps of PROSTITUTES!!! It doesn’t make a man start engaging in ANAL SEX. There is nothing you men would not say to justify your bad behaviour. That is why Nigerian men do not get better, they just sit around with nasty attitudes and convince themselves they deserve the most virtuous woman.

Even some single guys do not do prostitutes. Do you know how twisted one would be to walk up to an obvious call girl and negotiate price? You think that is a habit a man would develop just because his wife denied him sex?

The lady clearly stated that she joined him in Canada and noticed that was his way of life. Yet you still have to twist it and heap the blame on her. This is his lifestyle.

You people would not die if you tell yourselves the truth. Ahnahn!!

Sense. You too get sense
I barely comment on nairaland, but I just had to quote you

Religious place, religious family, religious gatherings, religious parameters etc is a very tricky place to get a partner because religion is a big cover up. The truth is that the tricky ones know the real ones wen they see one but the real ones don't know the real ones. Guys know that they need a good woman to b a wife and mother to their kids even though they really might not want to get married so dey pick up unsuspecting victims appearing religious like them. You can stay put in that house with him or just gather courage and leave him. Nothing you do will change him unless he learns his lessons in the hard way and u will b left to treat his mess

My advise for u is to keep praying to God to change his mind. While doing dat, I will advise u step up ur game with him, by seducing him through ur dressing, body language ( buy set of sexy lingerie/ night wear), go to gym to build a good shape, feed him with good meals and put up a fake u( by dressing nice, do a nice makeup and tell him u are going out to see a friend( but within u, u are taking urself out), do as if u have a call from dat ur friend, asking him for d meeting address in his presence, make him feel jealous, make him feel d same way he makes u feel, make him feel like u have someone better than him, (but within u, u know u are not doing it and you are praying to God), I believe, he wouldn’t want to loose a good wife like u to a stranger. I still believe there is not impossible for God.

I THINK THE INITIAL DISTANCED RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN YOU GUYS PUSHED HIM INTO IT AND NOW ADDICTED TO IT...PRAY TO GOD TO HELP AND DELIVER HIM..DIVORCE SHUD BE THE LAST OPTION because HE APOLOGIZED AND NEVER JUSTIFIED HIS ACTION..ITS WELL WITH YOU

ChiomaCa:
Hello everyone, I'm in need of an advice, I got married to a man 5yrs+ ago. He relocated some months after marriage to Canada, I went to meet him 2 years after. And we had a baby 10months after my arrival. Immediately I arrived his place, I noticed he flirt alot onlline, Sex chats, Video sex chats, Visit porn sites, visit Prostitue Sites, and the rest. I caught him red-handed twice and he begged and pleaded not to do such again. I forgive him and I believe maybe because of the distance we had in two years.

We move on and I promise myself not to even go near his Laptop or mobile phone anymore.

I adhered to that for more than a year, which I'm still doing that till December 23 of 2021.

My daughter threw his I-watch inside water. Then I picked it up to drain for some minutes, after I drianed, I realised a message popped up , which Read " Do you enjoy me yesterday Do I book you for tomorrow again"

I was forced to check what's this. I saw hell. In short, he visited two different Prostitues in a hotel to book 30 minutes session with them for $160 and $220, I also saw other messages asking for Anal sex from these Escorts. I realised, he visited them 3rd, 1st 22nd of December. During these period, I was the one begging him for sex. He said he's not interested that he's Fixed with many activities and Shifts at work.

I was in the house hopping my husband as gone to work, not knowing he's doing something else within his short break and free time.

Immediately I saw this, I was devastated,I was mad at my self. We are very religious. Why all these for God sake, this is the 3rd time, what have I done to myself, have made a wrong choice?

I called his brother back in Nigeria and I inform and sent all what I saw to him, he called and talked to him, the next day, my husband came to me, apologize and promised not to do that again. I accept and forgive him.

Few days ago, I have been having this kind of feeling, I feel like I'm not beutiful because why will my husband prefer a Prostitue than me.

I hate myself, I think about it every minutes, whenever I see him, my mind keep breathing fast. I'm sad and I'm not happy, I don't know what to do.

I can't discuss with my parents, because they see my husband as the most religious person.

He doesn't talk much, keep friends nor drink.

I need advice dear mummy and daddy please is this a red light?

LMAOOO. I think the answer is obvious to you but you are still in denial/ making excuses for the pig. Cheating is egregious enough but with prostitutes? Divorce him and go and do a thorough STI panel testing from HIV to Hepatitis to Herpes to Syphilis. Maybe, you are financially dependent on him and he knows this. But run for your life. That man will kill you.