ibechris:
This kind of story is shameful to hear because if u are my sister,this marriage would be done and dusted honestly.

How do u chose to stay in such a home when it is obvious he has turned u to a slave and nothing more.

Madam,find ur way and live for your children,if anything bad happens to that man,then u will know what it means to be an independent woman.

I am a married man who believed that women should be empowered financially either through business or conventional jobs and I hate to hear stories like this coming from a 2.1 candidates.

Be wise madam.

Thanks.

.

InTheCloudySky:
You need a job or source of income for yourself and kids before you can take any decision. I'm sure when you met him at 16 (?), he started controlling your life since then. You and your family probably thought that was a good thing but now you feel caged. If he has always been the way, changing him will be difficult, but you've been married to him long enough now and know him better than anyone else.
Thanks pls if you guys have any job offer for me in port Harcourt pls I am very interested at least you guys have seen what am passing through incase an email comes to you
Seek professional counseling together but if he doesn't want to or doesn't change, you can do what's right for you. But again, you need to get your finances together first. This is why I always tell women to have their own money and not rely on a man's.

it's well thanks..pls anyone with a job offer in ph pls am interested , atleast you know what I am seeing without being told

ellaV:


I have been praying, but it's looking like the more I pray the more he gets worst, a lady Neighbor of mine I told my problems to told me to follow her to ijebu that my case is moi moi... am seriously thinking of going because I have suffered alot

I feel real pity for your husband for the kind of wife he married. Running from Pastor to JuJu all because of some trivial issue which u would've been able to mentally sort if u truly graduated with a 2'1.

Do you know how many people get rejected on a daily by companies they apply to? Did you really check your attitude to know if you're actually the cause of your sack and not some sad sadistic spiritual notion? Seeking ideas from his mum is also because she's wiser and more knowledgible than you.

Either of two things would happen eventually with the way you're going. These pastors and JuJu men are either gonna eat your money and sleep with you, or eventually turn your husband to a pauper.

Klass99. You believe the mother in-law is really of the marine kingdom? These rent-a-prophet guys will see anything just to extort their victims . They can only see, they can’t break the yoke binding her husband?

ellaV:


I have been praying, but it's looking like the more I pray the more he gets worst, a lady Neighbor of mine I told my problems to told me to follow her to ijebu that my case is moi moi... am seriously thinking of going because I have suffered alot

Do not go!


Like why do people like moving from fry pan to fire ? Moimoi my foot! She’d take you to where you’d be offered solutions by the devil and he’d in return add bigger problems to your life. If you are a true Christian, you don’t need running from one church to another. Get down on your knees and cry to God.

StPete:


I feel real pity for your husband for the kind of wife he married. Running from Pastor to JuJu all because of some trivial issue which u would've been able to mentally sort if u truly graduated with a 2'1.

Do you know how many people get rejected on a daily by companies they apply to? Did you really check your attitude to know if you're actually the cause of your sack and not some sad sadistic spiritual notion? Seeking ideas from his mum is also because she's wiser and more knowledgible than you.

Either of two things would happen eventually with the way you're going. These pastors and JuJu men are either gonna eat your money and sleep with you, or eventually turn your husband to a pauper.

Pls try not to subject your wife to what am going through cos by your write up I know them mentally sought out, do you know how many times I have talked to him to pls set me up..u can't imagine...I just don't want to argue with you.

Xilsbridalhouse:

Do not go!


Like why do people like moving from fry pan to fire ? Moimoi my foot! She’d take you to where you’d be offered solutions by the devil and he’d in return add bigger problems to your life. If you are a true Christian, you don’t need running from one church to another. Get down on your knees and cry to God.

it's well..thanks

ellaV:

Pls try not to subject your wife to what am going through cos by your write up I know them

I'd be very willing to divorce a woman like you who would readily go to a pastor or juju in place of proper logic and reasoning

StPete:


I'd be very willing to divorce a woman like you who would readily go to a pastor or juju in place of proper logic and reasoning

Be married first, and marry someone that won't listen to your talk, then come back let's have this conversation...

ellaV:


Be married first, and marry someone that won't listen to your talk, then come back let's have this conversation...

And who says I'm not married with more age in marriage than you?

The bold caught my attention. Madam, don't follow that friend to Ijebu because whatever you will be told to do there will be fetish, and will have serious consequences on the long run. According to you, your mother inlaw is a marine goddess or so, the source of power at Ijebu will be same as that which your mother inlaw has. You cannot use devil to cast out devil.

You are supposed to increase prices of items when requesting money from your husband, so that you can be saving some money. By now you should have been able to set up a business for yourself. For him to buy you phone by himself means your phone is probably tracked and all your calls/messages monitored, so be mindful of the calls you make ahead of whatever plans you have in mind.

Either you continue to stay and pray pending when the spell will be broken, or you quit.

ellaV:


I have been praying, but it's looking like the more I pray the more he gets worst, a lady Neighbor of mine I told my problems to told me to follow her to ijebu that my case is moi moi... am seriously thinking of going because I have suffered alot

StPete:


And who says I'm not married with more age in marriage than you?

lol...your so single, I came here for solution not arguement, kindly check the next topic...tnxs

ellaV:
lol...your so single, I came here for solution not arguement, kindly check the next topic...tnxs

Lol...nairaland kids...e say I'm so single

LilMissFavvy:
The bold caught my attention. Madam, don't follow that friend to Ijebu because whatever you will be told to do there will be fetish, and will have serious consequences on the long run. According to you, your mother inlaw is a marine goddess or so, the source of power at Ijebu will be same as that which your mother inlaw has. You cannot use devil to cast out devil.

You are supposed to increase prices of items when requesting money from your husband, so that you can be saving some money. By now you should have been able to set up a business for yourself. For him to buy you phone by himself means your phone is probably tracked and all your calls/messages monitored, so be mindful of the calls you make ahead of whatever plans you have in mind.

Either you continue to stay and pray pending when the spell will be broken, or you quit.

My weakness is lieing about the price of things,anytime I want to lie once I look at his face I will say the price...I have tried to lie on price of things but I didn't work...why can't he just do the right thing so we be happy..is that too much to ask?

ellaV:
I am married to a man for 6 years who goes about telling anyone whose cares to listen that he is not the marriage type and family guy..we have two kids,he doesn't want to set a business up for me,give me money for upkeep,or give me money to start my Masters...this is someone that has millions as savings and I borrowed 20k from access bank since last year March he can't give me money to pay...I decided to work, 3 months to the work,I was dropped I did my findings,someone came to testify negatively about me to my boss and that was it...I apply for jobs,a contradicting mail will be sent to the company and i won't be calledi,I graduated with 2:1...my husband buys my phone and it's only him that has access to my mail,i asked him if he did that he said no, but I know it's him...as am talking to you know everyone in my area has light since 4 days ago because we use prepaid meter,light has finished, he is not moved that we are in darkness? He traveled for a job since 5 days ago and he don't care,there is so much I want to say but let me not bore you...I feel unproductive and stucked in this marriage, pls what should I do? I went to church and I was told his mum is in the water kingdom and tied him to herself that he only listens to her and whatever I say means nothing, all he does is sleep with me , that's all, if you knew me when I was single , you will be in awe to see me now...what should I do pls?

if he opens business for you now u will start overiding him insulting him so baba wan manage u if u feel u can't cope file divorce ungrateful house wife

ellaV:
I feel unproductive and stucked in this marriage, pls what should I do? I went to church and I was told his mum is in the water kingdom and tied him to herself that he only listens to her and whatever I say means nothing, all he does is sleep with me , that's all, if you knew me when I was single , you will be in awe to see me now...what should I do pls?

Wait a second....don't tell me you seriously want to believe the reason why your husband doesn't value you as an individual is because of a cock-n-bull story fed you by some mog or pastor?.

Anyways, you explained that your husband has near no respect for you in the marriage you both agreed to - marriage is a contract/agreement between a man and woman - and you are merely a glorified intimacy gadget, baba mama and housegirl in your union, but desire more. So tell us, what do you intend to do about what is your predicament? Surely, if you truly believe you are worth more, you must have ideas on what you would rather do to change your situation?

heniford2:
if he opens business for you now u will start overiding him insulting him so baba wan manage u if u feel u can't cope file divorce ungrateful house wife

by their talk you shall know them ...that why at old age or when they are sick like julius agwu they get a dose of their medicine..smh it takes nothing to be a good human being...change

Increase prices of items, simple as abc. If you have children, that's another route you can be using to collect good money from the selfish* man. Why should you Pity a selfish man who has the money, yet is frustrating* you.

ellaV:
My weakness is lieing about the price of things,anytime I want to lie once I look at his face I will say the price...I have tried to lie on price of things but I didn't work...why can't he just do the right thing so we be happy..is that too much to ask?

ellaV:
it's well thanks..pls anyone with a job offer in ph pls am interested , atleast you know what I am seeing without being told

I thought you said the man has frustrated your many efforts at getting and keeping a job so far? So, would he do the exact same even this time?,

Pierocash:
intensify your prayer. Seek counselling from your pastor.

SMH.... intensify prayer? LOL....

ellaV:
pls recommend

Stop letting people pile on what is their foolishness into what is already your overflowing plate of the very same. No false mog or pastor can save you with lies from what is a terrible situation in marriage. Engage your brain instead abeg!

ellaV:
it's beyond physical and he was not like this when I was dating him

Stop lying to yourself thinking you decieve others by doing so. You are not a caged animal and you can as well chose to walk out, move back to live with your parents, get a job and start life anew if you wanted.

ellaV:
by their talk you shall know them ...that why at old age or when they are sick like julius agwu they get a dose of their medicine..smh it takes nothing to be a good human being...change

just like you will dump ur husband and flee to another man claiming you have done enough when his sick if u can't stand it why not divorce him so that another woman can enjoy him also greedy housewife

Kobojunkie:
I thought you said the man has frustrated your many efforts at getting and keeping a job so far? So, would he do the exact same even this time?,

if he sends an email..you ignore simple....there's is prior notice here to what am going through

ellaV:
if he sends an email..you ignore simple....there's is prior notice here to what am going through

Oh, so you are looking for a person who will not only hire you but also carry your drama for head as well?

All while you continue to occupy role of sex try, house gal and baby mama for a man who does not acknowledge you as a human being or his partner - that Mrs title sweet you very much, abi? . You never serious at all.

---

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

Pierocash:
then I advise you visit another church like winners, or MFM. That your pastor is not a serious pastor.

If you are in Ph, I can recommend one for you

How's the pastor not a serious one?

Make he go arrest her husband or make he use magic sermon him?
Op no go use pastors complicate your matter

heniford2:
just like you will dump ur husband and flee to another man claiming you have done enough when his sick if u can't stand it why not divorce him so that another woman can enjoy him also greedy housewife

I pity your wife...your maltreating her,she keeping quite, nature will put you at her mercy and those period she will have her own pound of flesh...pls men,am talking about the irresponsible once,you know yourself,when you have a good loyal woman by your side treat her well,help her grow cos the seed you sow in her today is what you will reap tommorow...

Kobojunkie:
Oh, so you are looking for a person who will not only hire you but also carry your drama for head as well?

All while you continue to occupy role of sex try, house gal and baby mama for a man who does not acknowledge you as a human being or his partner - that Mrs title sweet you very much, abi? . You never serious at all.

---

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

thank you I got the message

ellaV:
I pity your wife...your maltreating her,she keeping quite, nature will put you at her mercy and those period she will have her own pound of flesh...pls men,am talking about the irresponsible once,you know yourself,when you have a good loyal woman by your side treat her well,help her grow cos the seed you sow in her today is what you will reap tommorow...

am already married to a white lady self developed lady with Three kids so shut up if he helps u grow now u will still not support him when his down u will institute hate among the kids against ur husband, am glad men are wise enough if u calm ur a super lady why not divorce ur husband and watch how it goes. yeye housewife

ellaV:
thank you I got the message

Don't get me wrong here. I don't advocate divorce for anyone since only the one wearing the shoes knows where it pinches.

If after 6 years, you are OK with living in a deluded state consoling yourself with the savory lies fed you by pastors and mogs as explanation for your situation...if that helps you believe the humiliation worth it, then by all means, continue.

If you are really ready to see change, then i would expect you be willing to at least abandon the lies and take meaningful risks in assuring change.