₦airaland Forum

rockycongos:
My guy my wife is like dat, she is a baby and emotional giant. Ignore the punk, go to d meeting and be calm. Let dem battle it dem self. My dear she wil eventually move out of yor house. Just dont care. Be yourself. U dont try, make she go look bush.

Justkatty:
This story get as e be o
You've said hers

She maybe in one group complaining of your own character too
This is a faceless forum always try and open up, so you can get a sincere answer or tips on how to go on.
Marriage needs 1fool and 1knowledgeable person to make it work .

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore.

I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

socialmediaman:
Has she always been like this?

First of all, you're African. Don't let your wife manipulate you into having some power sharing agreement with her or any of that sort. You're the leader in your home as far as your marriage is concerned, but being a loving partner and having a peaceful home free from avoidable rebellion may need more wisdom and better leadership skills.

Do you often micromanage your wife? This may not be necessary because she is a full grown adult and can make decisions of her own when you delegate tasks and responsibilities to her.

Take for example, cleaning of dishes. Some people do that while cooking and then after meal, while some people wait till after meal when it has piled up. As long as it's done within a certain timeframe (like morning, afternoon etc), don't try to control when exactly she does it, let her handle that. Don't see her sitting down for some rest and ask her to go clean the dishes immediately like she's some child. If she's lagging in her responsibilities (e.g. not doing the dishes at all through the day) due to too much downtime, then you can step in and demand an explanation, maybe she needs better time management.

If extended family meetings are not working for her, try couples counseling and see if that works, but I recommend you honor the invitation from your in-laws and possibly go with someone/people from your extended family as well, as witness(es)

Make your home conducive for her, but if she still insists on leaving and continues to be malcontent, maybe she needs some space for her emotional well-being, don't force her to stay so that you both don't end up in a toxic situation

Kobojunkie:
Abi oo!

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

Ken4Christ:
If you are a child of God, pray about it. I mean, if you are born again. Otherwise, first surrender your life to Christ.

Sometimes, marital issues have spiritual undertones. She might be under the influence of a wrong spirit that wants to ruin your marriage. You can take authority over that spirit and ask it to stop. If it's a spirit responsible, her attitude will change almost immediately.

But if it's something you are doing that she doesn't like, ask her what she wants. If it's something you can do just to please her, do it to save your marriage if you truly love her.

I strongly recommend you see your Pastor for counseling.

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

barneystinson:
Genuine desire cannot be negotiated. You cannot talk her into wanting to be with you. Neither can her parents. With women, the medium is the message. Her disrepectful behaviour and avoidance of intimacy is her way of saying she's done with you. Move on.

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I

theForth:
Do women truly love?
I dont really buy that.

All that is needed for a realtionship to run is respect and everyone pulling their own weight, the man providing and the woman nuturing.

medriano:
Marry a second wife please.

elonmuskbaby:
lmaooo man wey don get migraine,you wan add diabetes to solve migraine?

Sominablack:
Greeting Nairalanders,
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment which I have learnt to ignore. Her mum visited and confirmed these attitude, she did counsel and advised her to change yet she was reluctant and stated she dont want to continue being a wife that she has lost love and feelings for me because I want things to be done decently and in order in my family which she is opposed to. Having observed this her mum left angrily and told the matter to her husband to confirm some of the issues of my wifes behaviour which I had stressed on and as a result had a family meeting with her family since I was invited not long ago.

Now with the attitude still being displayed by her, her dad asked me to come down to the village by next week so the issue will be discussed in their larger family so that my wife would come and explain to them why she is behaving the way she is doing, but not up to three months we had a meeting and now this one billed for next week again.I dont feel like honouring the meeting because I have done my best to follow peace even though I cannot fathom where I am at fault. At this juncture what do I do?

MartinCorridon:
Any wife who's disrespectful has cheated or will cheat.

That's a final stage. Shows she's not emotionally committed.

King2019:
African
Have humans become something that can be separated by geography or regions dictated by the past
Everyone is equal before the creator the faster you realise this the better for you.

Sominablack:
My wifes attitude has been unbecoming, disrespectful, avoiding intimacy for months, insultive and always playing the silent treatment

boldx:
Tell your own people to call a family meeting for her.

GooodHardDick:
Oga, do you need a prophet to tell you that your wife has another guy banging her pussy?

Haven't you heard Nigeria girls are so useless, All of them? With her behaviours, you don't need anyone to tell you that your wife secretly and codedly has another dick banging and servicing her pussy. My brother Your wife Na Olosho, just as most Nigeria girls are. your wife is looking for a way to end that marriage and be with her new lover. That meeting definitely won't stop her from hoeing around.

Oga, You better divorce that girl for your complete peace of mind. Stop killing yourself, forget her and move on

baby124:
Hmm. Hope you have not turned your relationship to master-slave relationship. She’s not your child, she’s your wife. Apply flexibility and trust her to take care of things. Maybe you are authoritarian and controlling. She’s tired of it. You can’t fully control and dictate to another human being. It will make your relationship fall apart. All humans desire free will and it is our nature. Try to be flexible and overlook petty things.